Immune/natural killer cell treatment when TTC or pregnant (aka the 14th pred thread)

[sunnyday01]

Continuing from 13th thread

Determined I'm gutted for you - big hug. We all know the feeling.. Surely this time it will work, this time I deserve it to work, or at least it should be good odds by now? I'm sure as everyone has said though it will- we can't lose hope as we've seen, those who persevere seem to get lucky .. We just don't know when but must keep hoping it's soon. It's just not fair though is it. I'm also on the complex programme so hope our levels aren't too high or something - maybe worth asking if would be helpful to take intralipid infusions every month.. Expensive though. It's always possible it was just an unlucky one.
Hope- it's great you're able to give us all hope and so happy for you you're passing some major milestones now. I've not done the herbs but maybe I should. I'm weighing up doing SO now though and not sure how much I can juggle! Do you know anyone who can do the scan in Edinburgh as Edinburgh Clinic and Spire can't :-/ Hoping accu helps. She's v nice and seems good. The sessions are much shorter than others I've had though but might not be a big deal.
Trying - I'm also wary of the pred and been avoiding but pretty sure I shouldn't be. It's partly Hope's success that made me think it might be ok (but she doesn't have the same NK issues) and also I am worried about my sanity.. Have a full on job too :-/ Nobody can tell you the answer but Mr S is best qualified to advise. Would you think about SO?
Hi everybody else - every month is a new month and a fresh start :) x

Hi rosa. I'm not sure what I think about SO. As I'm ovulating (my day 21 bloods show I am) so not sure why releasing another 2 eggs would help really? So I'm not sure if I would go down that route until I've had a hsg and sperm test and even then I need to read into it and get a lot of advice about it first...I'm convinced my tubes are blocked as I had 3 weeks of retained products on both of the last miscarriages. I've also had 3 quick pregnancies and now it's stopped. It makes me feel something has changed....I took the pred as prescribed for 3 months and haven't had them for last 3 so i doubt it's the pred stopping me....

Who knows!

I'm going to have pred this month for 6/7 days only and then not taken it ever again unless I get a bfp

I have to admit I've looked into IVF as I do feel I'm headed that way.

Work does make this difficult, I had a full on job too but after last miscarriage went part time (went down soooooo badly at work but I couldn't care less!)

Trying I think today's stresses are so high at work full time and then all the stresses team nk cells go through defo part time was really good move. Fx for your pred month! I hope IVF doesn't have to be your next step and this month works for you both x

I'm really sorry determined, I hope you are looking after yourself and I am sure you will regain your strength to carry on with the journey. It is so hard and frustrating that we have to go through all this but we will get there - when i feel down i look through earlier threads to find stories of other ladies on here who have gone on to have children and that really helps me.

Sorry your feeling down trying - its so hard being positive month after month, and picking yourself back up. Don't give up hope though - i am sure it will happen soon for you.

I actually find going to work helps me, it gives me a distraction for the majority of the week so I can't keep thinking about what i am going through/keep researching thing as i just don't get the time to do it.

I used to find work a distraction but after each miscarriage I found work unsupportive of my time Off and just gave me a added headache. I did think i would get preg quickly so i could relax during my preg rather than running around! I'm a doctor and found my mind wandering wasn't great for my job. I've found part time Is letting me have some time to do fun things at home and my stress levels are def lower....
that's great u find work a distraction!

Nearly weekend, another week and hopefully a week closer to our babies

Nearly time for ur moon face to go hope! Yay! So pleased for u :)

ah yes as a dr - i guess your mind wandering isn't the best plan! i'm lucky that i sit at a desk and write reports most of the day so some mind wandering isn't too bad. Plus I have been very lucky that when i had my 2 mc my previous employer (and line manager) was very understanding. I have changed jobs last year though so no idea what my new company would be like! I can't believe companies can be so unsupportive with mc - i found it a hard balancing act the second time as i wasn't sure if to tell them or not - in the end it all happened so quickly i didn't have time to tell them before it happened.

Hi ladies

Just wanted to check in and say hi and thanks for your lovely words, love, e-hugs and support. It really means a lot...more than you could ever know so thank you so much ;)

Have to admit I did have a few cheeky glasses last night and am in the process of Od'ing on chocolate, French bread and more wine later!! (So much for a low alcohol, low gi gluten free diet eh!?).

Lots of virtual hugs back and good luck whatever CD you are on

?Xxx

Go for it. That's exactly what u need and have some glasses of vino on me! C

Enjoy determind, love a bit of Choc wine overload hope your doing ok.
Tryig how the heck do you deal with the copious amounts of pregnant ladies that must come through your doors? Well done for staying sane ! X

I don't work with preg ladies phew!! I'm in a totally unrelated field phew again!

Getting there thanks Dildoos! Sugar and booze overload is numbing the pain ;)

Deffo double phew trying...now that would have taken some special skills!! X

That is a double phew!
I think we should as part of a miscarriage after care be sent to spa for a weekend to help with relaxation x

i agree dildoos! i think unless u have been through it u can't understand how devastating it is. i never did.

hope u have a few more days away determined. i hope ur DH is sending lots of hugs and kisses ur way.

its a long though road we are on. so not fair! but hopefully worth it in end

The sad thing about it is I never reLly heard of miscarriages until I has one then you hear of lots and lots of them. They are actually the most hideous situations to go through as your on the highest high so the bump seems so low! Of that makes sense, when there is a bereavement in your life your allowed to openly grieve and feel sad and talk about that person, with a miscarriage I find you can only talk to your dp as they are going through it and every other person didn't grow to love and feel the wa you feel about your tiny seedling , share the hopes and dreams you have for them so it's a lonely loss and that's the hardest part?
Sorry I really feel sad about them xx

I totally agree dildoos. Noone else understands the loss.

I said to DH yest that I think u become a parent as soon as u see those 2 lines on a hpt. U plan, u change ur whole life, wot u eat, wot u drink etc. and then for it to go is devastating. It's truely so so sad.
I've found people around me think I should be ok and normal again.
Hope ur ok, u seem v thoughtful about it all....

Dildoos - I totally relate to everything you wrote. It's just the hardest thing. I can see how some people sink into depression and take years to recover. I feel guilty moving on in some way .. But eventually it's too painful and I realise I'm compromising my future and the life of a future baby etc.
Trying - been thinking a lot about pred. I might try hanging the pred this month and take a reduced dose - better than nothing but hopefully kinder to body and mind if not successful. Thoughts??
Hi everyone else - thank god it's Fri tomorrow x

I second that! Spa weekends should be mandatory!

I know exactly what you mean Dildoos. I will be coming home from hols in a few days and everyone will ask me how it was and I will put on my best enthusiastic voice to say it was amazing, relaxing, fun etc when in reality I really could do with a bit more time and sleep to process our loss (I am having a great time but it has been overshadowed somewhat). Like you said it seems acceptable to talk about losing a loved one (part of the process) but seems taboo when it's about a baby and hopes and dreams you may have had. I also find sometimes when I have brought it up some people feel uncomfortable with it and don't really want to talk and then I feel worse (and guilty for making them feel awkward) so I tend not to bother. ;(

It's so hard but you have us here on the board who are always here to listen! I do not know how I would be coping without you lovely lot!! Xx

I agree Rosa, I have really struggled to think about much else and make any sort of conversation and do feel like I may be a bit depressed. My rational brain tells me it's the grief, hormones and steroids and I will be fine in a few weeks and the pain will get better. But I can see how it can happen to people.

Re: pred I was thinking only the other day (for when we ttc) that I would maybe take something like 10mg pred until bfp and then full dose after as I worry about the long term effect of all these meds on our systems.

Yeah I've had a long chat with DH about the pred tonight. I've done 3 months on it and 3 off. I'm trying one last time as per mr s and then not again.

mr s says to take a break at 6 months. So I think that would be wise. Ur body def will need a break from it, it's hard stuff! And yes I think taking half or taking it for less days is very sensible. As I've said before mr s is one of the only consultants to say to take it from ovulation. All others say from bfp.....but obviously this doesn't make sense as the nk may stop us getting preg?! It's all sooo confusing. I've done my research and its all very early stages and noone really knows. So mr s has his protocol based on his best guess and his exp. but prof quenby in Coventry does pred from bfp based on her experience. But there's no study to show us what to do! It's all very experimental and we are gineau pigs! Therefore we all go round and round in circles. Would be easier if someone said it DEF helps.

Determined I know wot u mean exactly. I have learnt to pretend im ok so well. And I can go from
Crying in the loo to laughing and joking very quickly. It's really awful to have discovered I can do that!!!
After my second miscarriage I was broken and DH was keeping an eye on me And I was worried I was getting depressed too, but after a few weeks I came out of the fog. The sadness didnt go, but i got back to normal life after a few weeks (although i only took 3 days off work which was the most stupid thing i ever did). What im saying is, give urself time and don't be hard on yourself. Let urself grieve, don't push urself to do anything u don't want, look after urself and u will come out of it and be ready again. I've learnt this the hard way from work sadly. So now I put me first.

We are all very strong ladies.

Ps determined have u looked into nduke or gorgy? They do immune stuff too...
X

I was adamant the pred was not helping/harming but since I have got pregnant on it and also not on it (took from bfp) I am now even more confused. The first one on it I think the egg wasn't great (SO and 2 large follies and one very very large).

I must admit I am looking forward to some 'me' time...I know that sounds silly it has all been about me so far but it's been about my body and a baby...I just want to be a bit more carefree and not think about meds, scans, injections etc. it's no consolation but I am happy to not be on pred, cyclogest and the aspirin at the mo.

Yes I have. I enquired about Dr Ndukwe a couple weeks ago. I am going to see what Dr S says about 2 losses on the complex programme and what further tests I can have. I know he doesn't seem to do all of them (infections?? dq alphas?? etc) but if it doesn't progress I may go elsewhere (nothing against him, really like him but need the full picture I don't see the point carrying on, leaving no stone unturned!). Oh and I think after 4 losses I prob need a hycosy or whatever they are called?!

After each miscarriage I spend 2
Months holidaying eating and drinking. I think it's therapeutic. We are hard on ourselves with dont do this and do that.i don't think any of it matters, it just gives us a seance of control. So yes concentrate on u....

That's interesting so u have got preg on it, and then off it? I can't rem why I stopped SO?

U stopped SO

Because we were on a break after the last m/c. I didn't think I physically could get preg without it (only got preg on it or with herbal supplements to balance my pcos hormones because I ovulate late and have a short LP).

Only thing to bear in mind is that I had ILS only 6 weeks before I was preg again so maybe that helped? God only knows!!

What's ils?

Intralipds?!! God it's so confusing to know wot worked!

I think sometimes SO kick starts some womens cycles and some do get preg when they go off it.(weird but I've read a lot of women that happen for) I hope that happens for sunny!