40+ and TTC? Join the club...

[cloudjumper]

To continue the support for everyone 40 and over who is or wants ttc. Lots of hand-holding and understanding, we're all together in the uphill struggle.

Hi guys I just wanted to chip in regarding late ovulation. I have always ovulated late.conceived my only dd on ovulation on day 19. Two subsequent pregnancies were late ovulation. The other two were iui and ivf. After the miscarriages cycles went AWOL and dropped back a few days but recently back to ovulating later. I too though longer ovulation means egg hanging around longer but it worked the first time.
Worry is that my period are becoming lighter.. Does that mean uterine lining is thinner also which has been a major problem for me before not helped by 6 months of clomid 2 years ago. Any tips for helping it out ?

We have decided on ivf in jan so it feels like we have we some sort of plan.

Hi ladies, another question from me! I had an answer phone message today with my blood results. My first test before I knew about mc was 98, 2nd test was 3 days later (last Friday) and 31, 3rd test was yesterday (thurs) and 38. Why would it go up by this small amount? They have said I should go again next Thursday for another test. Should I be concerned?

I think Grizzer 31 to 38 is within the error margins and since these numbers are tiny they will fall to zero soon enough. You have not bled after the period you had just before you found out you were pg, have you? That means the few cells which create hcg are still there, even if not developing. Your hcg will soon dwindle to 0 or even if not, woth so low levels your period will most likely come and clean everything out. I would not worry as yet.

Grizzer - glad Jass has posted, she seems so knowledgeable about HCG tests. Her error margins explanation seems entirely reasonable - I know from having had a kazillion thyroid tests (I'm hypothyroid) that even testing at different times of day can generate small fluctuations in hormones.

Well here's some stats trivia to (hopefully) cheer the start of the weekend. Has anyone ever taken a look at the ONS birth data by year and by age of mother? This particular dataset goes back to 1938 - before reliable contraception and IVF of course - and the 40+ year olds were going strong!

For example in 1938 (in England & Wales) there were 24,474 babies born to mothers aged 40 - 44 (in fact, roughly the same number as born to those aged under 20) and 2,085 babies born to mothers aged 45 and over.

www.ons.gov.uk/ons/datasets-and-tables/index.html?pageSize=50&sortBy=none&sortDirection=none&newquery=characteristics+of+mother+2014&content-type=Reference+table&content-type=Dataset

Thank Jass & Chewy. I did bleed after my scan for 4 days so I thought that would be it. I think I just felt nervous yesterday because I felt so achey & flu like & those were my first symptoms of previous dvt from retained products. I think I'm just a exhausted though. Full of cold so am probably just unwell.
Very interesting stats Chewy. I'm feeling quite positive about the next few months. I'm in the 24,474 bracket so should be no problem to have a baby in 2015!
I'm going to arrange a phone consultation with my 'natural gynae' dr & he is going to tell me how to get pregnant..... I'll let you know when I know ??

Just realised my smiley faces are coming out as squares! just practising!

Hello all.

Had a break from this thread for a few days, but thanks for asking after me, Grizz. I was getting incredibly upset and panicky, and, with lots of money worries at the moment I could feel I was getting a bit beside myself. So, I stepped away for a bit.

I've had some lovely PMs that have boosted me, and I have an appointment with the GP on the 9th. My plan is to ask for as many tests as the NHS can provide, and quickly as possible. Thanks to MN I have a rough idea of the cost of private HSG and I'm also encouraged by a couple of options that seem to be out there that are cheaper than full IVF. This could all be hypothetical, of course, due to our parlous situation (I'm on the 'how cold is your house' thread at the mo!).

Anyway, I'm now back in the bosom of you lovely ancient ladies.

Welcome back Awomb. Glad you're feeling better. Very quiet on here! I've started a new exercise regime - 40 mins a day for 60 days!!!! I really want to tone up a bit so will try to stick to it. Dh is doing it too so not sure when we'll find time or energy to dtd.....

Grizzer what sort of exercise are tou doing for these 40min? I hope after 60 days tou feel addicted to it and will not stop! I really think exercise is making me feel and hopefully also look 10 years younger than I am. I went back to figure skating class this autumn after 30 years (!) and I find that thanks to my excessive running habit I have a fitness level much above the girls half my age. It is amazing how much doing sports helps to keep us young!
How is Hcg doing? I hope it is not detectable by now. But I admit it is scary - once you know your womb has a habit to retain even tiny bits of conception products it is really worry each time. I have an eerie feeing that only in thelast clean-out the retained products from my first mc were properly eliminated- because after the last cleanout my period is now as it was pre-mcs saga. I have no more spotting before period. I never had it before first mc. The products of that mc were removed twice and even if hcg was zero, the tissue was still there. I am quite hopeful that now when my cycle is back to norm maybe the mcs will somehow end too. Unfortunately I am already almost 45 so now the risk of all other trouble is so high that I can not have much hope:-)

Jass, I hope you are right about the miscarriages, the clean up, and hopefully better luck for you next time. I think I had a long time between conceptions due to something not being quite right after my second ERPC: my periods were so light and practically non-existent, with lots of pain for a while: I worried there was scarring, and there may well have been, fortunately things are back to normal now.No pain at all, thank goodness. But I don't know if there's permanent scarring,which may be causing me to miscarry the two times I've had a bfp since the second ERPC.

As for the exercise, Grizzer - well done - a great accomplishment if you do it. I started that grueling diet/exercise program 5 weeks ago, and that had a hour a day, 6 days a week, but sadly I couldn't keep it up with all the worries: MIL almost dying, FIL dying...However, I do love exercise, and do try to do something daily, even if it's only something small. Yesterday I didn't because I went to acupuncture instead. Which was very good. I was told my Yin is a bit depleted, and Yang a bit too high. Yang is the masculine/activity etc. My TCM lady says I work too hard and do too much and I need to stop in order to balance my yin. Well, that isn't going to happen (though after Christmas I have 5 weeks off work). She thinks I am not conceiving because of this misbalance, but I am inclined to think she's putting too much into a small thing.

Anyway, tonight I'll go to the pool for a swim, tomorrow I have a yoga class, and on Friday I'll take the dog for a very long walk.

It's called 'Insanity' Jass. It's just online so I jump about the kitchen with the laptop shouting at me! I'm not sure it's my kind of thing really but I'll give it a go. I prefer classes at the gym or swimming. Dh is doing it too but we've decided to do it every other day so we can dtd on the inbetween days I don't have the energy to do a full days work, get dd sorted & off to bed, do 40 mins exercise & then dtd! Not sure I could even do that in my 20s!
As for levels - I have another blood test tomorrow. I'm sure I have retained tissue too Jass. I have never properly expelled the placenta after longer pregnancies so don't see why I would after short ones. Maybe I'll ask tomorrow if they will do another 'clear out.' I always spot before AF but acupuncture seems to have reduced that which is interesting. I have made an appt to talk to the natural gynae man in a couple if weeks. Don't really want to wait that long but there is no way I'll find the time or the privacy while at work so will wait for Christmas holidays. I may have had my first AF since mc by then so that would be good.
How is dh Gum?It can really hit home once all the arrangements are over.

Hi Have been on this board several times.. Recognise Gum.
44 have 5DC Ds is 3 and Dd 9 mths. Older dc are 17,16,15. It certainly is possible to have a baby- I used the sperm meets egg plan and success first go. Although it is exhausting and unromantic!i had 4 mc one of which resulted in large blood loss,so risks are there.

Main message is that it is possible!

Just popping in to say hi. Nothing to report sadly. DPs semen results came back normal, although most of his good swimmers are swimming in curves and zigzags, probably why I'm not duffed lol. Still taking the supplements and having weekly acupuncture. Booked our holiday for my 40th so at least I shall be celebrating it and not hiding away.

Fingers crossed for all of us xx

Sorry to be dim/boring/annoying, but what is sperm meets egg plan, please? Thx.

Sundae if you just google SMEP then all the details will come up.

newera Well done on booking your holiday and definitely celebrate your birthday!

I've tried the SMEP, but gave up because it was exhausting

I am currently ovulating and stressing about dtd. Already panicking we missed the boat again - very strong OPK on Wednesday evening, dtd. OPK line still present last night, but much weaker, Cbfm only saying 'High' yesterday and today (stupid thing). Did not dtd last night, but will try again today - I really don't want to get another bladder infection, but at the same time, I am worried it'll be too late. Why can't this be easier?! Why do I have to devise strategic insemination plans like for a WW3 battle?!

(Rant over, sorry)

Funnily enough I was having a similar convo with my acu lady saying that I was so sick of peeing on sticks, inserting soft cups or probes, using lube etc etc. I honestly can't be bothered and even when I know to the millisecond when I ovulate and time sex accordingly I still don't get pregnant. So I am knocking the whole thing on the head this month.

I read on the Preseed site that it's a bad idea to stop having sex during our non fertile times of the month as regular sex increases a mans testosterone. So this month we are going to have sex every third day across the month with an extra session thrown in around the time I normally ovulate. I think it will be good for us as a couple and good for me to not me doing the DPO countdown and getting myself in a fizz.

Thanks for your positive story Littlepink, I'll keep hoping!!
Where have you booked newera? I would love a holiday.
I've just ordered new ov sticks. Can't help poas just to check even though I'm trying to dtd every other day throughout the month
I started that last month & it does stop you counting days.
I've been called back for another scan on Tuesday. It was just an answer phone message so I didn't actually get my blood results but I'm guessing the levels aren't going down. Apparently it might be a small ectopic so might need some intervention. Why is nothing ever straightforward?

Hi newbie here two daughters I'm forty nine Angels just been referred to specialist for help scared what will say , I'm disabled with few disabilities but tic for six years lost last angel three years ago daughter no 2 was a clomid baby

Hi Foggy & welcome. So sorry to read about your losses. Were they before or after dds were born? Seems like a lot to have to go through before being seen by a specialist. Do you have an appointment yet?
Quiet here this weekend. Hope that means everyone is out & about having a lovely time. We've decorated our house; Christmas lights everywhere - I love it! DD has a temp & is a bit out of sorts though. Duvet on the sofa & TV on now. Hopefully it won't come to anything too much x

Hi everyone. Hello foggy and welcome. Big wave to Littlepink.

How's everyone?

Although I'm no longer ttc, it seems that I am in the tww, feeling nauseous and actually took a test this afternoon. I had the familiar nausea plus metallic taste in my mouth and a terrible craving for vegemite toast. All of which are pre-menstrual symptoms, but it did drive me to do a ept. Of course it was negative.

So it seems, despite convincing myself that I wasn't ttc, I have in fact had timed sex and am in the tww, dealing with maddening symptoms yet again.

Bah humbug...

I hope your DD is feeling better, Grizzer.

I found out last week that DS's persistent cough is likely to be asthma, so he's on a preventative now. His cough is gone and he's much better now.

Work is winding done now, I've finished reports and marking, now it is all planning for 2015. I will start holidays next Thursday, and have 6 weeks off. Hurray! we are really ready for a break, and a positive new year after the awful one we've had. My dad came through his operation with flying colours, all is well and he may not have to have further treatment (for prostrate cancer), they'll check PSI again in January.

How are you feeling Cloud ?

Morning all, and greetings to foggy.

Had my GP appointment this morning, to try to get to the bottom of those confusing test results that caused me so much anguish a couple of weeks ago. Turns out there was some paperwork I wasn't given, which showed my day 22 result was 34.9, so that's much better. Neither me nor the GP (AKA The Loveliest Man Alive) know what that weird printout was that I was given.

He has put in for me to have a Day 21, a Day 2, an overall hormone profile and a referral for DP to have his SA done again. The idea is that we get tests that are as up to date as possible and we go from there.

He said that he couldn't see anyone on the NHS doing another HSG, given that the last one showed no problems (although I'm convinced it helped me get pregnant). He also agreed with the consultant who had told me that he wouldn't recommend Clomid for me if the test results come back to show I'm still ovulating.

I don't really know what the test results will hold, I've been really ill for a few weeks now with a virus, so perhaps that will affect them, I don't know.

The GP also spoke about how tough IVF is to go through, and that he knew of couples doing it who had been taken to the brink. Oddly, that made me feel a bit better about it, given that we can't afford it anyway.

With a proge above 30 at day 22 it is good chance indeed that you are ovulating. Of course tou can always temp to be really sure:-)

I've always resisted temping because my sleep is so awful. Don't you have to have a certain number of hours asleep, then take your temp when you wake, but before you get up?

No idea. I fall pg often enough to believe I OV without temping. But Gum would come along and tell