TTC first time

[StellaLuna82]

Hi there,
I am new to mumsnet although have been lurking for a week or two!
This is our first time TTC, last month was my first cycle, AF came on Friday. Disappointed, but don't know what else I expected!! As this is my first time I am just after advice really, didn't realise pregnancy was such a mine field until I started looking into it properly!
Some people say you ovulate at 14 days, some say before, after...when is the best time to DTD (last AF was 28 days) or should you just be doing it constantly!
Any advice would be great. :) Thanks.

When I came off the pill last December I hoped it would happen within a couple of months for me.... I had been on the same pill for 10 years and hoped my body would just go back to normal.

My first few cycles were 29,31 and 30 days.... I kept thinking I would probably ovulate around the 14th so from around then that's when we would dtd the most...

Then my cycles got a bit longer... I started having 34-35 day cycles and even had one that was over 55 days. This was totally unpredictable and obviously made it hard to pin point ovulation and the months just dragged.

I tried charting my bbt but that method didn't work for me because I was doing shift work including nights so it was hard to take my temp at the same time in the morning every day.

I started using clearblue digi OPKs coincidentally around the same time that my cycle started to regulate.
I started having 34-35 day cycles more consistently and for 3 months in a row I got a positive OPK on cd20.
Knowing that I was ovulating a bit later we started dtd (for conception purposes) around cd16 and would basically do SMEP (google it) - which is basically where you dtd every other day and when you get a positive OPK you step up a gear and dtd every day for 3 days... Skip a day... Dtd one more time.

Anyway I actually conceived the 3rd month of using digi OPKs and only wish I started using them earlier cos we spent months dtd at the wrong time of my cycle!

I had my 12 week scan on Wednesday and everything is perfect

So I conceived in September ... 9 months of trying but 6 of third months we were, a lot of the time, focusing our efforts at the wrong time of the month!

Lots of people say to just have lots of sex.. At least 3 times a week throughout your cycle. That's fair enough but that was not possible for me. I was working crazy shifts... DH often works away... We have low-mediums sex drives anyway and both commute in and out of Central London most days... Getting up at 5am and not getting home til 8-9pm some days... Let alone when I was doing night shifts! So it just wasn't possible for us to have sex every other day through out the month! Nor did we want to

This is a really long post... Sorry!

If you can have lots of sex throughout the month then just do that! If that doesn't work for you, I would strongly recommend clearblue digi OPKs and SMEP.

Make sure you record everything - I used a couple of different iPhone apps.

And one last thing... Pay attention to your cervical mucous.
In the last few months of ttc when I was using OPKs, I also finally started to notice EWCM which would start to appear in the few days leading up to a positive OPK.
When you start to see EWCM, start dtd more because it means ovulation is on the way

GillyBillyWilly, what a kind and very informative post. Am going out to buy an ovulation kit today now. Congratulations on your news. How exciting for you

Good luck

Ttc can be stressful and worrying... In hindsight, I suppose it didn't really take me that long to conceive but every month when AF arrived was heartbreaking and I started to really worry if maybe something was wrong with me... Maybe we should go to the doctors... Get checked out... Maybe we will never be able to conceive...so many thoughts go through your mind!

I would also recommend taking conception vitamins such as pregnacarez

Also, DH and I used conceive plus lubricant... Purely because sometimes I probably wasn't in the mood to have sex and a bit of lubricant kinda helped to get things going if you know what I mean!

And also because some of the earlier months I didn't seem to have much EWCM and so I thought the lubricant would help carry the sperm to its destination

First of all thank you for all the information!! Really helps.
And secondly, congratulations, how wonderful! :) :)
Think I will continue TTC to DTD for a few more months, but wont rule anything out! Now hoping for a Christmas BFP, though am unsure how I'll explain not drinking to friends!! Anyone else ever been in that situation?

Back from Lloyds Pharmacy with a bag full of stuff that will probably freak out DH . Stella, I was thinking that I won't cut out alcohol completely; small glass of red wine/mulled wine every now and then should be alright. If I go to any parties, I was thinking of getting non-alcoholic beer straight into the glass or just having a half a coke and pretending there is vodka in it. Just to avoid some embarassing conversations. Not sure I want to 'announce to my friends' DH and I will be DTD regularly; if you see what I mean!

Ha - I was thinking that too, rum and coke without the rum! ;)

How do you work the smileys on here btw?

Underneath "Add your message here", there is a list. Next to the smiley you want, will be what you have to type in, in square brackets x

Congratulations GillyBillyWilly :D

Thanks for your info I will follow your advice this month and try the SMEP I've read great things about it. I have also bought the conceive plus this afternoon so we'll see if that helps move things along IYKWIS.

For the not drinking, perhaps some Appletiser in a champers glass if you're in your own house? Looks similar! Or some sparkling water with cordial for a sparkling rose? Depends what your usual tipple is or use the antibiotics excuse? Or slimming for NYE?

StellLuna We're also ttc our 1st and I'm on my 2nd cycle this month and got positive CB OPKs last month for 2 days and DTD but AF still arrived so will follow GBW advice above this month. Exciting!

Good luck Stella & Kitty :)

I conceived after 8 months in October using Chinese medicine. I went and got assessed at my local centre and had acupuncture, as well as some foul tasting herbal teas and pills but it seemed to work. If you're in the London area I can highly recommend the centre I went to.

Ok, Ember, you're further on with the lingo than me, going to embarrass myself now, what's CB OPKs?
Yeah, we spend Christmas with family and friends so the alcohol tends to flow quite freely, will be thinking of some excuse just incase! Good luck to you too!
Congrats to you Dizzy! How far along are you? Also noticed you must be a Smiths fan? Me too, awesome band :)

Thanks for such an informative thread ladies! I am new around here and it was only when we started TTC that I realised that its not so black and white as I first thought! I came off the pill in September and still have not got regular periods, my body is still adjusting and I have had 3 periods since September. This obviously makes it hard for me to predict or test when I am ovulating or whether I am actually ovulating at all! Does anyone have any tips for this when to test if your periods have no regularity? I am tracking them via an iPhone app at the moment! Thanks again! :-)

Also, the closer I get to 30 (I am 29) it scares the death out of me that I won't be able to conceive naturally? Does anyone else feel like this?

I'd aim to have sex every other day, over the whole month, that way you're more likely to catch your fertile days, remember though that sperm can 'hang around' in there for a few days too, so that increases your chances too.

Try to relax, it's easy to get caught up in the dates, timings etc.

Please make sure you take folic acid too, it's really really important.

Good luck!!

Also, buy pregnancy tests from eBay!! They are pennies each & work just as well. I should have had shares in clear blue when ttc!

I'm 31 and worry sometimes. But my Mum had me at 34 and sibling at 38, and there seems to be so many people having babies later now. A doctor told a girlfriend of mine that the average age of a 'career' woman is 34 for her first. There's time yet!! :)

Thanks StellaLuna82 I know what you mean. My mum had me at 33 and my partners mum had him at 38. I guess its just the norm now which is comforting to know

Yes! stickysausages I have been checking eBay and Amazon for pregnancy tests. I can't believe how much they cost in the likes of Boots. OP kits too. At this rate I won't be able to afford a baby

I hope not, Becky2984, I'm 32 and 33 in January, so I really wouldn't panic about suddenly not being fertile as soon as you turn 30-you'll drive yourself insane, I'm sure! I hope we all get the BFPs we deserve [fingers crossed]

stickysausages, just bought 2 packs of 4 ClearBlue; feel sheepish! If I need them, next month, I'll order off eBay. Thank you!

They cost a fortune! I could never wait to test, and my cycles were very long, and slightly irregular, so I never knew when I was due. So I went through a lot of tests!