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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

How often do you do the deed?

11 replies

SnowBells · 28/10/2013 10:55

DH and I are TTC, and are in our mid-30s. Just wondered how often is reasonable to do the 'deed'?

We are finding it difficult to fit 'TTC' into modern life (both working long hours, etc.). I know this sounds terrible!!! We manage to 'do it' each day during the weekends, but not sure we can maintain it during the week!!! We're basically shattered by the time we get back from work.

We will try hard this month. Just not sure, it will completely take the fun out by making it obligatory almost. Worse still - on my most fertile day (ovulation) during the next cycle (should this one prove unsuccessful), I will be thousands of miles away from DH on business. Not sure, we can 'do the deed' before I head to the airport!!! Hmm

OP posts:
shelterbelter · 28/10/2013 13:40

We're the same. We could defiantly try harder and it do it fire frequently. Promised to do it more this cycle!

Metalhead · 28/10/2013 16:30

If you can manage to dtd once mid-week on top of your weekend activity you should be ok as sperm can live inside you for a few days, especially around your fertile period.

And you're not alone in finding it all a bit too much, DH and I are usually quite relieved when we get to the end/beginning of my cycle and can have a little break from dtd! Grin (Though obviously getting a BFP would be preferable...)

Original poster
SnowBells · 28/10/2013 19:09

Phew... we're not the only one. We used to joke that one day, DH will have the exact same face as my dog when a female dog/bitch around him is on heat - let's just say: the breeder kept him as a stud - but very soon sold him as a pet! Anyway... DH is getting there sooner than he probably thought!

This TTC thing is not easy - especially when your friends and relatives just manage to get it right the first time round!!!

OP posts:
eurochick · 28/10/2013 21:11

It's definitely not easy. You have to prioritise it over the best times (close to ov) - make an effort to both get back from work and make sure you get down to it before you nod off. We both tend to get changed when we get in, so that tends to be our mid-week opportunity. We both work long hours too, so I get that it is not easy but we have made the time around ov for every one of the 36 cycles we have been trying.

We were weekend shaggers before ttc so midweek ttc sex is obviously ttc sex, but we keep it up for a week to ten days after my period and then we go back to weekends once I am sure I have oved.

I have a real bugbear about people who say "ooo, it took us about 10 minutes to conceive, my partner was very disappointed " If only they knew how shit ttc sex is once the novelty has worn off.

NoAddedSuga · 28/10/2013 21:15

When i came off the pill to start ttc we had sex every other day for a month. 6 weeks after coming off the pill i found out i was pregnant.

Even when you are really tired or dont feel like it, its important to still do it

Lexie1970 · 28/10/2013 21:21

For us this method had the desired effect:) DTD on 10th day of your cycle and then every other day for 10 days....

Original poster
SnowBells · 28/10/2013 21:52

Hmmm... I have a 30+ day cycle, so apparently, my fertile days don't com in until Day 14 at the very least.

TMI, but this cycle, we did do a warm up on Day 11, before going on to Day 14, Day 15, etc.

Let's see whether this works. Right now, DH is on his laptop doing even more work though!!!

OP posts:
KatAndKit · 29/10/2013 08:31

Three times a week from the end of your period to when you know you have ovulated. That's probably only four or five shags a month. Once you are sure the egg has gone you can go back to once a week for fun or have two weeks off
(i wouldn't do that, having some non ttc sex sometimes is important for your relationship and sanity)
Friday, Sunday and Wednesday is only one midweeker and means you always have sperm no more than three days old up your tubes.

obviously, if you get a positive opk it makes sense to at least try to have sex on that day. Might be a bit of a chore but it is going to increase your chances

Writerwannabe83 · 29/10/2013 08:57

When I fell pregnant me and hubby had DTD 3 times over the course of 8 days and focused on my fertile window.

Tea1Sugar · 29/10/2013 12:32

We dtd 4 times in about 8 days. Although it was only my second cycle we used pre-seed and got a bfp but not sure if it was fluke or if it actually helped.

PinkHat1 · 29/10/2013 15:01

I don't really have any tips/advice to share but just wanted to add you are not alone! It's also quite difficult for us to dtd a lot so often weekends are the main times although very occasionally we manage it in some mornings! Lol

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