Put on your capes and rub the Unicorn belly aka "my dear, please pour baby gravy on my egg!" - JUST SHAGGING PART 18!

[ZingWantsCake]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share and with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo;

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

The link to Part 17 is here

Happy shagging shaggers!

no grad thread link sorry, can someone else add this please?

Oh right! That's good then minion. Do you have to tell them as soon as you find out then, to get grounded? Or do you still wait until 12 weeks? I am so nosey! lol.

Welcome back bear! Sorry you are exhausted though. Any plans for the week off?

Two days from ERTD here. Been doing a pretty good job not to think about it too much every second of every day but i'm not feeling too hopeful. Not begging DH to do his SA yet though, thought I would wait and see just in case a miricle happens and we crack it this month so he doesn't have to go! As soon as she gets here though I will be kicking his ass to get a day off!

haha. Cross post with essie but same questions! See, it's interesting minion!

How exciting for you essie! Hope he's got something fab planned for you. You both deserve it!

Ooh a surprise trip! how exciting! I wish my DH was that imaginative! Although he's been magic doing DIY round the hose lately, so I shouldn't talk him down

You're not really supposed to fly for the first 12 weeks anyway but after that you technically could till the 27 weeks cut off.
BUT because our wage chances dramatically the moment we ground ourselves a lot of the girls don't tell work till either after the 12 weeks or till they start showing.
How they must deal with the tiredness, hormones and generally feeling quite off, is beyond me.
I would have done the same but made the mistake of telling the husband and he would like me to ground myself straight away and the closer it gets to actually having to work on Xmas day, I'm agreeing with him.
Haha, I'm a lazy worm!

Just been to docs to check out this random growth on leg. It started out last year as a red mole but it's grown a bit and now a deep purple colour with a red ring round it,
Gulp.
So I called them this morning and she saw me within half hour. Now that's service from the NHS. I guess anything to do with the big C has to be dealt with straight away huh? Anyhow she said it just looks like a collection of something's or other which has bled into itself but if I want it whipping out (I do, I do) then she can book us in.
20 mins apparently nowadays, last one I had took off took an hour!

Right, I reckon your husband is taking you to York/London/Manchester or Leeds for a Christmas shopping/dirty weekend extravaganza.
He sounds like a keeper! (though if you coincidentally end up in a town when their home team is playing footy and find him musing at what you can possibly do on the boring Saturday afternoon) LTB hehe.

Any other bets?

Minion you are scaring me slightly, DH's Dad has season tickets to their fave team and I did say once I'd like to go as I've never been to a proper footie match (the seats are in the Directors box too, some ancient family thing means they get them every year, can't wait to inherit that one! Though apparently you get champers. So I could probably learn to like football!). DH doesn't got that often cos its a really long drive. Hoping he wouldn't do that to me! I know its not a spa, cos I mentioned booking that and he said to go ahead, though I didn't cos I couldn't find a good deal. It won't be shopping, cos I'm crap at that. Not London cos I went on Sunday. I will try and get a hint later! Normally I can guess, but I haven't a clue this time (not that this happens alot!). He knows I want to go to Edinburgh but 2 days and 1 night isn't enough time cos its so far. Hmmmm.

Really I didn't know you weren't meant to fly for first 12 weeks but makes sense. I think I'd be scared of flying when preggers but then I'm shite at flying anyway, don't understand how the plane stays up though my SIL flies all over the place all through her pregnancies.

Fab they got you in so quick to look at your leg. Will they remove it (the mole, not your leg!) under local?

minion I hope you get xmas off and a bfp. That really sucks your wage drops with being grounded. Are they even allowed to do that with all the preg discrimination laws?

We're trying to get on the right side of the law of sod and have just booked a holiday abroad for May 2014. Not too worried about flying later on in pregnancy as I did at 6 months with ds but would be nervous before 12 weeks as I wouldn't like anything to go wrong away from home.

I didn't know the 12 week thing either! I was trying in lead up to wedding and honeymoon so probably good job I didn't get BFP!

Essie - what about a trip to lovely Bath or Cambridge? Lovely weekend treats I think.

Oh surprise present! I'd be dying to know! DP is amazing in so many ways but doesn't have a romantic bone in his body. He keeps telling me he'll be romantic the day he proposes but I think his version of romance will be quite manly. Bless him.

Urgh I don't think I can actually be bothered to have sex this month. I'm all sexed out from the last few cycles of non-stop-every-other-day shagging.

Anyone else feel like that? I love my dp very much and find him very attractive. but I just can't be arsed and I'm completely knackered all the time. I went for 2-3 hour naps during the day most of last week.

But as dp told me yesterday 'can't make a baby without having sex'. Cd7 and haven't managed it yet.

Nooo, it's cause I'm working and on my feet for 12 plus days, pulling 18stone carts and lifting metal canisters with 30 bottles of water etc in. As a passenger you won't have to worry about it, but because we are always walking around we are more susceptible to turbulence etc.. So it's frowned upon.
I mean, you can, but there's always the question of 'what if' isn't there?
There was also a situation years ago which involved 2 pregnant crew members who passed away and as the foetuses were of a certain stage the final toll was 2 more than actual passengers present..
So very very sad. Poor girls.

Yes I said I want the mole thing whipping off ASAP so they've got me in in about 2 weeks, standard to send it off for analysis but I'm not worried about it.

essie I'm just yanking your crank, it won't be a footie match... I hope that's not final last words being the law of sod.
I think it's a posh hotel, restaurant and general country manor in a beautiful country surroundings, either that or a travelodge in Weston super mare... X

Minion - that's awful that your pay drops once you're grounded. It's not like it's your fault! That's rubbish.

Dulcet- I'm with you. Bath and Cambridge are lovely. Bath is tres expensive though. I'd recommend staying in Vradford on Avon which is much cheaper and a pretty little place and it's ten mins on the train into Bath. They have done nice pubs in BoA too. The Cotswolds are nice for a cosy weekend away too.

I'm off to the Peak District for a few days of hols. Looking forward to it. Spending the rest if the time catching up with friends and stuff. Got work to do as well but not thinking about that just now.

Vradford= Bradford on Avon!!!

I'm voting for Paris!

I suppose I should explain about the way thing.
Currently for the company I work for we get a basic wage, a flying hourly rate and a split of money made on board.
So when I stop flying before I go onto maternity leave/pay I lose the flying allowance and commission payments. And a hosties basic wage is ridiculously low, so we get an average payment for a year split into the months we work.
And because we are so heavily protected re flying hours we only really need to work 10 days a month in winter and 20 in summer depending on actual contract.
Does that make sense? So if I was to get upduffed between nov-apr I would only have to work 10 days a month as its quieter etc...

Hi all just checking in! Sorry I haven't been around, just been waiting for ERTD to show up and I think she has made her appearance. Good thing because we are off on Holidays on Sunday so she should be tailing off by then!

Essie how exciting a surprise trip! Wish my DH would take the hint and do something like that but he says I ruin surprises by guessing them!

Minion fingers crossed for your pre Christmas BFP!

Hi! minion, here's hoping we are both knocked up by Christmas! If my IVF schedule goes as planned, I'd take a pregnancy test the weekend before Christmas.

ERTD is over and out, so on my last natural cycle before pulling out the big guns. We are going to shag, shag, shag just in case! I have a good girlfriend who was basically told at her IVF consultation she might never have children (she'd just had a huge tumor removed from an ovary or uterus, don't remember which) - and then two weeks later, found out she was pregnant. She now has three children, all naturally conceived and delivered. So anything can happen!

Oh, and jealous of your trips, essie and bear! I'm trying to squeeze in a weekend getaway soon (we celebrate our five year anniv. tomorrow) but it's been so tough with work and other schedules. Grr.

Stories like that Red are awesome.

Here's hoping we are all knocked up by Christmas!

Still no idea where the trip is though DH tells me I need my bathing suit! He actually used the term bathing suit. So I think we are having a trip back to the 1920s. I'm hoping its Bath though!

OPKs have fizzled out, and I never got a proper strong line, though I have been doing them in the evening, as it's the only chance I get, so perhaps they are not working properly. Who knows. Blood test is next Weds so we'll see what they say.

Nothing much to report. Cat brought in a mouse which took DH and I 24 hours to evict. Bloody thing.

hi all,

as I had a MC 5 years ago today I can't help but re-living what happened.
it's nice that the kids are all home (teacher's strike & illnesses) as surrounded by them makes me feel strangely peaceful.

I'm about to ovulate and we are going to give it one last try this month to TTC - but I just had to be on the other side of today as sometimes the build up to a sad anniversary can be way worse than the day itself.
(and it's been horrible again this year)

although I haven't posted for a bit I've been reading - again so sorry the MCs and ERTDs and all your struggles.

Zing, sending you love on a very sad day. Hope you are ok xx

Sending you a hug Zing.

I hope everyone is ok. I had a very emotional day for no apparent reason other than DP is not in the mood and I'm ovulating :( he has a chest infection so I shouldn't be too cross with him but I am. He then made a comment about not wanting our DC to be the youngest in the year as they'd be behind everyone... I said 'like you?' as his birthday is towards the end of the month... I know he was joking but seriously don't!

Saw my GP and I've got to have blood tests to see what my hormone levels/PCOS are/is doing now I'm off the pill and another one to see if I'm ovulating. The good news is that the prediction strips seem to be working for me (they don't necessarily work for women with PCOS as their hormone levels are high anyway) as they were negative a couple of days then positive. I should count my blessings really. I'm due to see my Gynae in Dec if I haven't got pregnant by then so fingers crossed...

Hope you're ok today zing. remember it's ok to be sad sometimes.

maggie hope the docs and tests go ok.

I have doctor tomorrow to see about cyst in my uterus. I'm so worried about being fobbed off. I just have an instinct something isn't right. Constant dragging/heavy ache in my belly, stabbing pain in ovaries, needing to pee all the time, long heavy periods and complete exhaustion/lethargy. I hope they take me seriously. My dp knows I'm going to the doc and he hasn't even really asked why I feel like there's no one I can really talk to about this. I don't want to worry my mum and it never comes up in chat with friends. Glad I have mn.

What a lovely story about your friend Red! So nice to hear the hopeful stories.

Auntie my DH does that all the time! I'm August and he's September so clearly intellectually superior to me. Arse. He used to mean it, that we wouldn't have a baby towards end of the academic year but because its taken so long he's let go of that now and its just keep trying throughout!

Hope you get the answers you need pizza. Is it weird DP hasn't asked why you are going to doctors? I don't talk to DH about any of it in detail but im sure he would ask why.

So AF due today and nothing yet...

sending you hugs zing and
ertd pretty much gone so shags ahoy!

News this morning that my SIL had her third baby boy, I should be happy for her but just feel sad and jealous. Feel like such a cow! Also found out via facebook so not the best way to hear. How are some people able to just pop them out!?

Doctor was lovely although I wasn't in long. She suspects urine infection so have been fobbed off with anti-biotics. But she did also order an ultrasound for cysts so I should get an appointment time sent to me in next four weeks. Just in time for xmas!

Need to heave myself out of the pity pool now. Going to go for a nap Going cinema tomorrow so that should be fun not been in ages. Been pretty good on the dieting/healthy eating so will treat us to some naughty snacks.