Put on your capes and rub the Unicorn belly aka "my dear, please pour baby gravy on my egg!" - JUST SHAGGING PART 18!

[ZingWantsCake]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share and with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo;

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

The link to Part 17 is here

Happy shagging shaggers!

no grad thread link sorry, can someone else add this please?

Hi aloho, glad you are feeling better.

No I'm not hopeful for this month either. 5 days til ERTD due. I would have been as we've jsed lots and at the right time too, but now I know I have a roadblock I think it is highly unlikely! doubt that will stop me getting obsessive and neurotic in the next few days though

Sorry you've got to move house suddenly, have you got somewhere lined up?

essie We've put an offer in on a house, but it's in an appalling state so even if the sale goes through we'd have to have builders in for at least a month, so we might have to find something interim...

How do I view your profile?!

I don't know! I made it clickable and public and everything? MNet is confusing me! I'm going to poke a few buttons and see whether that works...

Exciting about the house! It will be worth the stress to have your own place. Nope, still can't click on you...

www.mumsnet.com/Profile?nick=bludgerwitch&photos=p

Essie click on her name. It will load her profile, which will have a link for photos.

Bludger thats a positive :)

Argh! Link works, but the photo is showing as one of those annoying little red crosses when the link is broken so I can't see it! sob!

It doesn't work cookie, it does when I click on yours but not on bludgers - YAY for the positive though! Woohoo! xx

Is it? I can't quite believe it, I'm 11DPO, shall I instruct my OH to get my a digital one and try again tomorrow?

It is a faint positive but def a positive congratulations

Oh not sure why that is essie does it work if you click on the link?

Yes yes def get a digi, when I tested at 12dpo I used a digi as I could not find my cheapo ones. Seeing the word pregnant is the best feeling! !

cookie No idea, I think the problem is my end cos if I go to your profile all your pics are blanked out too. Oh well. I will use your eyes if you don't mind!

bludger - yay! Yes, deffo get a digi and do another one tomorrow. Hurrah! We are back on track with a new bfp!

Ahurrrrr, this has made me slightly barmy! Rushed out and bought a digi test, we'll sit on my foof for a few hours without drinking and then try, or maybe if I can stand it wait until tomorrow morning.

Bought myself a big bunch of sunflowers, just in case it's a false alarm, they might cheer my up.

That's a positive bludger, I am sure. You defo need a digi. How exciting! I will check back every 10 mins now!

Just to bring the thread down again, i'm out. Unexpectedly if I am honest. Partly because it's two days early and partly because I had convinced myself that this could be it a little. Few unusual pains in the right areas, the baps are a bit tender which is unusual for me and plus going to docs, having blood test etc I thought would be prime law of sod. But no. nada. Nothing. Means another trip for a blood test monday (CD2-5 test) and need to get DH to use his little pot...

Oh, and it hurts! I have bought myself a bar of the new weird cadburys with coca cola pretzels in it to make myself feel better...

Oh dulcet, sorry to hear this. You need some sun too. Enjoy the weird choc. I had some choc pretzels earlier as they were on offer in the co-ey. Yum.

bludger - any symptoms?? Fx for digi test.

essie I had very persistent pain in my left ovary over the weekend and had a raised temperature from Sat until yesterday. Also very scatterbrained. I'm sitting here clutching the box and waiting for the urge to piddle...

dulcet That's rubbish, is AF usually a bit irregular for you or is that unusual? Get yourself a hot water bottle, too, that often helps.

Think of waterfalls bludger!

Is two days early irregular? I am not really sure what is irregular and what isn't to be honest! Normally I am about 26-28 days. This is 25 but I have been out as far as 32 over recent months.

I do love sunflowers, they were my wedding flowers too! Maybe I will treat myself. You're right. I deserve it! haha.

OMG I'm 1-2 weeks pregnant!!!!!!!!!!

woohoo bludger another bfp...there is hope for us all!

Yay bludger! How you going to tell DP? Thats assuming you told us first! haha.

Now we really need to get out of this unhealthy house ASAP, I don't think I can cope with that many life changeing events in one week....

dulcet That doesn't sound that early, really - mine are usually like clockwork but every time I haven gone on/off the pill the cycle length has changed significantly.

Yay bludger I look forward to seeing you on the just shagging grads thread

essie my eyes are your eyes!

Thanks for the eye loan cookie! I had a look on my phone just now which allowed me to view the pics - yes, thats definitely a line not that I've ever seen an actual bfp, obviously this is irrelevant now, as you have done a digi, but I felt left out!

On the topic of cycle length, mine is usually regular but last ERTD was 5 days early, so there is the odd rogue one in there from time to time too.

I wouldn't worry about 2days early dulcet means you can try again quicker!