The Elderberry Pavlovas- All aboard the Berrycopter. Thread 14

[funkymonk]

The smallprint - Berries have a strict entrance criteria (TTC #1, over 30, TTC for 3+months, NO instadiffers, must have a special pot) and def no mention of baby dust or baby dancing UGH !!! Ooh we are strict...please note your house may be at risk if you do not keep up repayments lol

Wedding was hideous. Well, not the wedding, just my experience. I couldn't cope with the bump. Every time she came near me I welled up. Physically started feeling really unwell as well. Left at 9.30 but took over an hour and a half to get home.So glad to be back in my bed now. Wedding number 2 tomorrow, same bump will be present .

Good to hear from you tally, sorry you're still so ill, fx the scans keep coming back with good news and the sickness starts to ease off pretty damn soon.

Bunny are you okay? Sounds like a dreadful day.

Commiserations on the omnibump, barking.

I think I may have figured out today that I have a short luteal phase. I OV this month between CD16 and 17 but AF due on CD26. Is that short? :(

Actually lol @ barking's bollocks!

thunder sorry, I need to man up don't I? It's just nice and safe in here iykwim.

happy I haven't seen tally in any of the threads. Hope that means she's not still sick

bunny it's you're turn soon babs. In fact, I've saved you a seat next to me on the copter

sid ha! I tried to imagine my fc saying that and I had to laugh! Mine were downright rude at times not to be ungrateful of course Why does going private mean they choose their words better?

happy tally has been in the copter thread. She's out of hospital but still feeling crap

Feeling really low this morning. The wedding was just awful. Going back to work where everyone knew was actually a lot easier as I could just hide myself away and didn't have to pretend I was ok. At the wedding yesterday I had to try and make small talk with everyone even though I just wanted to curl up into a ball and not talk to anyone. I was attempting to be 'normal' for the sake of the social occasion but it felt wrong (and this is going to sound weird) as it was like I was denying the pregnancy and what had happened, and I realised with work that it was really important to me to acknowledge and talk about it. A wedding isn't the time to share though. It also bothered me that those that might find out later might assume I was ok as I'd been ok at the wedding (only 2 people saw me get upset and they were the two that knew why) which again makes me feel like I can't acknowledge how much this pregnancy meant to me.
I'm not making sense to myself here but I'm just having a little rant to see if it makes me feel better .

barking I think most people will know how truly devastating this is for you and that frankly, you needed a god damn break, which just so happened to be a wedding. If you came to my wedding after such a loss, I would actually be thinking what a truley wonderful and selfless person you were. Stop beating yourself up and be kinder to yourself, you deserve it xxxxx

Barking, I had a friend come very briefly to my wedding, which was only a couple days after her mother's funeral. She welled up when we hugged (I lost it and bawled, I was so touched she even bothered to show up), and she only stayed for the ceremony, skipping dinner, etc, but it meant the world to me that she came at all. You really shouldn't be so hard on yourself. It's amazing that you're even trying to go to these weddings, as raw as you must be feeling at the moment, and your friends will completely appreciate that.

Sorry for the AFs that have snuck up on people. Manly arm punches of commiseration all round. Also .

barking sorry you are feeling low. That is very understandable though, you are grieving, so putting a brave face on it and pretending to everyone that everything is fine totally doesn't align.

Do you have to go today? You are still recovering and it is ok not to go when you are not feeling strong- physically and mentally.

Sorry to af-ers. Sucks.

Thank you berries. I am undecided about tonight. I am currently thinking I might go for the meal then come straight home before all the dancing etc, leave DP with his mates. It's closer, only half an hour from home.

Morning all!

Oh barking sorry you had a bad day, it must be really tough seeing bumps. How rubbish to have another one today too! Be strong my lovely, you don't have to stay long, one day people will understand x

RP yep yesterday was hideous! I got my +opks 4 days late this month and the AF was 4 days late so your LP might be ok.

kitty you'll have had that baby before I get in that bloody copter!

Hoping for a better day today, went to bed last night and had a little word with him upstairs, the whole what's wrong with me conversation, why aren't I getting a baby, what did I do wrong etc and started crying again. Later DH came to bed and gave me a hug, I told him I'm so unhappy, hope he doesn't think I'm unhappy with him!

Kitten came in this morning and jumped on my head so that made me smile

Thanks bunny. :)

Barking, I think that is a normal way to feel. Not being able to acknowledge when you are hurting is very painful. Shoe your face at the wedding and then get yourself home and distract yourself. Soon enough you will back around people like DH and colleagues who know and are supportive.

Just been lurking but had to pop in to tell Barking that I just snorted tea down my nose because of your bollocks!

I think you're being very brave going to the weddings at all. Social occasions are vile. I know I ran out of a birthday party full of bumps in floods of tears and that was a good few weeks further down the line. You're doing great, and glad to hear you're having some moments of positivity amongst the sadness xxx

Bunny I hope he (she?) was listening. You deserve your baby and I'm so sure it'll happen for you.

Charming I love the story about the donkey! Made me go all gooey!

Hello to everyone else! x

Just logged onto school email. Got an email from the head saying she was thinking of me. Oh and could I make sure the aspect groups action plan and spending overview were handed in first thing Monday morning.
That seems about right from her! Back to normality!

Bloody hell barking your head sounds ace

Thanks boom I hope he/she up there listens!

Ugh I just can't find the energy to do anything, house is a mess and all I wanna do is slob on the sofa. Even though I knew the evil witch was coming there was a tiny hope that I might be testing this weekend, why oh why is there always hope.

Bunny AF is due Monday according to my normal cycle but i'm hoping against hope she is delayed at least until Weds/Thurs. Otherwise I will officially have a 9day LP. At least 12 days, please!!!

Also I think the cheese in the sandwich I am eating my desk may be off But I am eating it anyway

*at my desk. I am not eating my actual desk.

RP hope AF behaves! And hope the desk was yummy lol

Quiet in here today, best have a tidy up, it's a bit of a mess!

Right, need to get ready for round two. Got to leave the house in 20 minutes and not started my make up or decided what to wear.

Not finished knitting the bride & groom either.

Doing well.

Bad barking

Hope today goes ok x I'll be on here laters if you come back for a natter

Why are you knitting the B&G? Are you going to a wedding of woollen people?

Lol RP

You can tell I'm bored, been googling a lot, found the best TTC phrase EVER

'And think of it, if your Palace of the Child is not fresh, springy, and healthy, how can you expect an embryo to thrive there'

Ha ha ha

I'm sat next to a 6 week old baby. And DP has just shared with me that he thinks his best mate's wife is pg. I'm now hiding in the car until it's time to eat.

Oh barking hugs x

Argh, Barking. Get the heck out of there as soon as you possibly can.