What is the best tack to take? Diligent charting or just 'relax'?!!

[jacey2001]

I struggle so much with what approach to take while ttc. Charting, checking cm etc or just trying to ignore all that and bd every 2-3 days. This cycle I decided to do the latter but then I read on a board somewhere about someone having success with bding every day and v. conscientious charting- arrggh!

We are ttc no.2. With DS it took 4 cycles (cycles of 45-58 days mind you!). I charted for the first three and then gave up and got pregnant on the 4th cycle. I found the eternal waiting for Ov really demoralising and my temp in the morning used to effect my mood all day. The stress of ttc delayed my ovulation I think (strange that I can be stressed by other things and that doesn't effect ovulation).

We're on the 4th cycle and I know I should have more patience but I just hate the whole uncertainty of ttc. So, basically interested what approach to ttc worked for anyone who's a bit too negative about it all like me!!

I think there was a thread on charting vs chilling out and as far I can remember there was no real 'winner' - about evenly spread.

I would say that if you fell pg the month you stopped AND if getting stressed about it delays your ov. then go for the relaxed approach (if you can!!!)

the discussion re prediction vs regular sex was

\link{http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk?topicid=1366&threadid=160375&stamp=060406134509\here}

I think generally that a lot of women preferred to do charting, use OPK's etc because it makes them feel in control of their bodies, but imo as long as you're having regular sex, you're just as likely to get pregnant as if you predict your actual time/date of ovulation. In fact if you look at threads such as the one for persona users and the isis scope one, there are no more bfp's on there than on the positive june/july/whatever month threads. In fact the isisscope thread was started some time in March and to date there hasn't been a single bfp, not very positive marketing for the scope then, lol.

And if you talk to a doctor they'll invariably tell you to throw away your OPK's and thermometer because of their unreliability, and a gynay won't take your charts into consideration when treating you, which also doesn't speak volumes about the respect for charting in professional circles.

i charted.used ovul tests,etc, but my Dh had been stressed(low sperm count??not diagnosed) and we appeared to be having too much sex and were used up by my ovulation dates(or my ovulation was a few days late and we hadn't had sex close enough to get pg.Originally we were hoping for a girl hence the stopping too early thing (differant thread)

Bottom line, i decided to chill out. We had less frequent sex and now i'm 13 wkks preg.

Goodness knows if it would have happened if i'd charted that month and I was lucky to conceive at all. Just my limited experience. Charting is useful to get to know your body. I sensed the day i ovulated the month i conceived and sitting on toilet(TMI) at work I thought "ok, i've ovulated when I should have this mth.that's possitive. Pity we didn't make love last night.I'll have to try again next month"

Good luck

Thanks for that link wannBe - I am so rubbish at that!!

Thanks for the good advice. From charting before I pretty much know what my body is doing and when. I think it would be too stressful for me to do all the time.

I'm going to just try and bd every 2 days once any cm starts. My cm has been less than when ttc no.1 so I'm drinking more water which seems to be helping and I think we'll get some pre-seed. My LP is only 11-12 days so I'm going to get some B6 vits as well!

jacey2001 - good luck with it all
I've got a bit of a checkered past with ttc and m/c......dd1 was no prob, was preg but lost 2 inbetween dd1 and dd2 . I temped, charted, used the sticks, I so so so wanted to be pregnant and have another baby - and eventually did

just after dd2 turned 1 , I became preg - wasn't trying, was pretty shocked actually but really happy. Didnt even think I was and did a test at about 8 weeks or so. We had never gotten around to the conversation of having a third - decision made for us.

but it's too easy to say stop temping, charting, checking the signs, etc etc and it's hard to stop even when you've told yourself to stop.
hope you're preg soon1