Tentatively Trying for Number Two - if you had a tough time in pregnancy/birth/conceiving/carrying your first child....

[BarbiesBeaver]

I couldn't find another thread like this so am hoping there are some more people out there who had a bit of a traumatic time TTC number one and are now considering trying to repeat the process again.

Perhaps you had a long time trying or fertility treatment for your first child, or were ill during pregnancy, or suffered a traumatic birth, or had losses or miscarriages along the way.

Perhaps reading the other TTC2 threads brings back those painful memories of month after month with no BFP, or if you aren't sure you even can have another child, or if the faint positive line after pissing on a stick is just the start of the stress (will it stick this time? Can I afford fertility treatment again? Oh no what will work think if I need months off ill again? How on earth will I get through the birth? etc). I thought a dedicated thread for those in this situation might be useful and allow those going through similar experiences a safe place to share their fears and experiences. And drink plenty of virtual gin and eat plenty of hard core cake along the way!

My background - I am a previous BESH (they are a friendly bunch partial to gin) and had fertility treatment for my PFB. I had a couple of miscarriages along the way. The clock is ticking and my eggs are getting more wizened and ancient so am thinking of starting the whole horrid business again. And it's a bit scary.

Ok so a cbfm used it is going to be, thanks, as my cycles are certainly not the same each month right now!

I hated temping but used loads of cheapie opk from google and a lot of mucus spotting. My cycles used to vary in length but on good cycles I used to ovulate day 14. Since stopping bf I've had 2 short cycles 25,21,14 days then 70 :-( its all getting a bit confusing so predictably peri menopausal but I had those for 3 yrs before ds safely arrived and had 2 mc so I'm hoping-but I hate not knowing what's going on.

Yes the change in cycle lengths Andcake can be worrying, but reassuring to hear you had similar pattern and then your ds! I wonder how much pregnancy and bf affects ovulation ... So just ordered a month's supplies of cb advanced ovulation sticks off amazon, as we're cheaper than the non advanced ones! Not used before so will try. Not sure what date to start from on cycle, but guess it depends on how long it takes for them to come this month!!

I'd love to join this thread. I'm 25 and ttc no 2 first cycle. I have a 3yo dd for whom her birth included: 3a tear, MROP, PPH, failed stitches requiring full restitch and rectocele repair age 22 :(. Her dad left us when she was 2 weeks and hasn't been in touch soon. Fast forward 17months and I met my amazing now dp. As far as dd is concerned, he is 100% daddy. And to me, 100% amazing as due to all my birth problems I have had severe phobia of sex. We've been together 18months and only 2months ago I felt ready after CBT and him being fantastically patient. Next birth will definitely be a elcs which I'm fine with, I'm just ready for another one now!

Welcome Tea. You've been thought a lot by the sounds of it, but what a lovely partner you've got there.

I'm at that crazy point right towards the end of my cycle. I'm expecting my period anytime now but lurch between convincing myself I'm pregnant and allowing myself a little fantasy about that, and then not having a grain of hope that it will ever happen!!

I had so many sad experiences TTC #1 when I was crushed with disappointment at the arrival of my period that by the end, it was so much easier to not have any hope.

Does anyone else relate?

Brownbear you just described what I went through last week! The total fantasy of feeling pregnant, then crushing reality hitting! Lets hope yours ends positively!

Hi peeps

Not sure if I qualify for the thread - DS was conceived on our 3rd cycle and born on 2009, however started trying for #2 last July and had a miscarriage in Feb and June. I just don't know what to think!! Starting to wonder if we will ever have another DC x

Hello to the newcomers - grab a gin ice lolly. Everybody welcome here.
Tea well done - you are being very brave after all that! I will be having a section too if I ever get pregnant again, due to cervix damage during my last birth. I am glad you have found someone who you deserve and is being patient with you.

How are you doing Bear? I have ordered my Preseed - just thought you would all like to know!

I'm afraid I'm going to have to pass on the gin icy lolly. I craved and did a test earlier and I'm only bloody pregnant!

Needless to say myself and DH are somewhat in shock after the trials and tribulations of TTC #1.

Let's hope this is the start of many graduations from this thread!

PS Barbies I'm a big preseed fan!

I meant caved, not craved. Bit early for all that yet!

Woooohoooo Bear that's brilliant news!

Wooohoooo!!!! That is fab news BrownBear. Chuffed to bits for you :D And delighted that sometimes the end of cycle fantasy turns out to be real - I very much relate.

Hello to all new people. I'd stay away from me today, my head is full of snot - I so love being the recipient of all the germs from nursery. Does anyone else find they suffer worse and longer with the bugs than the small people?

The next problem is I now have no enthusiasm for SWI and should probably be getting on with it. I do wish my cycle was regular enough to know when I'm likely to ov, but it seems to vary wildly. Must fish out the preseed.

I have no idea whether I am ovulating either as my periods haven't returned. SWI seems like such a lot of hard work when I don't know whether it is worth it! I would rather sleep otherwise!

Congratulations BrownBear :)

How are the drugs going?

Thanks all

Dotty'spal I gather the way to try and spot ovulation before periods return is to look out for EWCM. Given I've only ever spotted any about twice in my life it wouldn't've helped me, but then we weren't ttc at that point anyway.

drugs are making me grumpy and headachey so they must be working

Waiting for AF to show up so I can ring and book a scan and start stimming but she hasn't arrived yet and is no doubt waiting for weekend when I'm off back home to visit family!

Still waiting for rivers of gore period here too Dave.

Congrats Bear

How are you all doing? Bit bloody hot for any shagging isn't it? Anything of note? Still no gore here

Nothing here either although I was so tired yesterday at work I thought I might be pregnant. I suspect I was just bored!

Lack of gore is crap Barbie (this being one of the rare occasions when this is true). Any sign of ov that might mean it's on its way?

What about you Dave? Started stimming?

We're currently SWI a bit, but my body is being its usual baffling self and doesn't appear to think ov is a good idea this month. Which probably means it'll happen three days after I give up on SWI leaving me with a longer than usual cycle and no chance of success. Hey ho.

Everyone enjoying the sunshine? (she says looking out of the window at grey sky). My small person went to nursery this morning with a thick cardi on upside down - her choice needless to say, and I couldn't be bothered fighting to get it off her. The good bit of her clothes stubbornness at the moment is the refusal to take off her sunhat (or some days her woolly hat which isn't so great in this weather but I guess still stops her head burning).

Well the gore fest arrived over the weekend while I was away

Down reg scan booked for Friday morning so will hopefully be stimming soon

DD is loving the hot weather and just wants to be outdoors all the time and in her paddling pool with the dog