Feeling my time is running out ... TTC after MMC.

[icklemssunshine1]

Hi all,

Some of you may know my story if you hover around the miscarriage thread & the original bigfatpostifrikinivity thread.

Had MMC in Feb. Wanted to TTC ASAP but I ended up in hospital on a completely different matter which I'm waiting surgical treatment for. I'm on 4 types of painkillers & have been told getting pregnant would no doubt end in MC & if by any stroke up luck I did carry past 12 weeks a pregnancy would cause greater health problems for me.

I just feel time is running out. Not even sure this is the right place to post. Guess I just wanted a rant & get things out.

I don't know your story but how frustrating for you. It sounds like pregnancy just now is not possible. How long do you think you'll need to wait for the surgical treatment - and how old are you?

I know, I think that's what's adding to my frustration & unhappiness. I'm nearly 35 (& freaked that MC statistics rise above 35), luckily I've got my first lot of treatment next month but its touch & go whether it works. I've been told its a long process, up to a year :(

Ok (I think I may have posted on a thread before actually?) So you could be looking at ttc at 36+. Time is NOT running out at that age. Yes the stats are different from those ttc at 25 but there's every chance you will be successful. It's the MMC that's the really scary thing isn't it - not the delay in ttc as such? Do you possibly feel like your body let you down before so how can you trust it again? That's really hard. All I can say is our bodies overall aim is to get us up the duff. Yes sometimes it falls down on the job but the overwhelming biological odds will be in favour of you holding your baby in your arms. Concentrate on using this year to get as healthy as you can and then ttc knowing that if you chuck enough sperm at an egg it will stick.

Thank you Northern - think you may have posted in a previous thread as your name seems familiar. You're absolutely right. The MMC was the frightening thing & it worries me I'll have to face it again in the future. I thought a woman knew when she was MCing. Didn't realise situations existed where you turn up for a scan & you're told the baby stopped developing. I know if I'm lucky to conceive again I'll be bricking it for 3 months! (& most likely for the other 30 weeks!) Thanks for your logic. I just wish I could TTC now. 12 months is so far away!

No reason why you couldn't get a scan before 12 weeks. You might need to pay for one but they aren't a massive amount and seeing a heartbeat would be a very positive sign. I don't think people talk about MMC much do they? Not till it happens to you or in my case to someone you care about, do you realise what can happen. So I think that people who have to face this feel very alone and unlucky. I know a year feels a long way - but look at this way. It's only 7 months till Christmas - and by the time you get past Christmas you'll be more than 1/2 way

I agree with northernlurker. 34/35 isn't so old (average in london, judging by my NCT group!), and the fact you got pregnant is a good sign for your fertility despite it ending so sadly.

Yes, it is true that things get tougher as your 30s progress. However, your overall chances are very good.

Re the scan, it is also quite possible your GP might refer you for one earlier given your history x

I really sympathise by the way. I didn't get together with my OH till nearly 34 and had similar concerns about it being too late, and your situation sounds very upsetting.

Definitely not too old! I got pg first time at 38 and had a mc at 7 weeks. Don't think that's as traumatic as mmc but its still shit. Then got pg within 3 months and spent every single day in a state of panic. Had 3 early scans on the NHS as they thought I was stressed (no shit! Why I wonder?) and have not managed to relax for a long time. I've now turned 39 and am 31 weeks.
The main thing is to make sure you give your body the best chance to cope so if you are told to wait I would wait 12 months and then go for it! Good luck!

Thanks all for posting. Sometimes I need a logical perspective on things. I speak to DH & he tells me motto worry but he had to say that, he's my DH!

Belissima, sorry about your news but what a wonderful ending. Hope all goes well to the end & beyond!