I get knocked down, but I'll get knocked up again, cos you're never gonna keep me down... The big fat posifrickintivity thread for people TTC after MC.

[SaggyOldClothCatPuss]

I thought I'd start the new thread and earn some brownie points with the posifrickintivity Gods...

saggy that's such a man thing isn't it? Saying that everything is fine when it clearly isn't. It's SO infuriating. I hope that you don't kill him though

I wont. I just want him to talk to me!

saggy I don't know what to say re your DP. Mine were against having a second when we first started trying in September. He felt we couldn't afford it. After the first MC, he came up with gems like, it's better this way since you know how I felt about another child . But after the second MC, he's finally came around to wanting another one. He no long said any such things. In fact he saw the peak on my CBFM yesterday and asked if we should BD again so to maximise the chance. He doesn't have a particularly high drive so this is very out of character for him. I hope your DP can come around when he's ready.

He'll be ok. And we will sort it out. We have been together 22 years an we muddle through. Bless him he has been totally against another baby for the last 10 years, to even be considering it is a good sign. As I've already said, its mental how stressful it is though! be careful what you wish for...

FFS! I take DS to a music group on Monday mornings and one of the other mums turned up with her toddler and a snuggly little 7 week old newborn. DS was peering into the car seat looking at the baby and she said: 'do you think he would like a little brother or sister?'

ARGGGGHHHHHHHHHH Why why WHY do people think it is appropriate to say such things. I just smiled and said I'm sure he would but was bloody boiling inside and so upset. If only she knew the pain some people are going through.

saggy sorry to hear you are having a hard time, I think it's quite normal to put stress on your relationship, it certainly has with us, the stress of TTC is bad enough without throwing MC into the mix. I guess we just need to keep communicating with our DHs and making time for each other.

Liesl that's fab news, congratulations!! This thread needs a few more BFPs to stop us all moping around.

Welcome fluff sorry you are here but hopefully you'll have a BFP very soon.

Af arrived

Sorry Emki that is rubbish

Emki - oh poo! Really sorry to hear that. Fingers crossed for June - we can be poas buddies as I got my AF yesterday too.

Guff - It's so frustrating when people say stuff like that - when someone made a comment like that to me, apparently I just looked a bit awkward and before I know it there's a rumour that I was actually pg when I wasn't just because I didn't set them straight. You can't win.

Liesl - Massive congratulations, hopefully you'll have started a lucky trend for June and others will follow suit soon. x

So, my new healthy regime failed by lunchtime...the AF chocolate cravings got too strong and I had a choccie bicci. Still, I'm sticking to the no alocohol rule - shouldn't be too difficult seeing as so many of my friends are pregnant at the moment, so I've no one to drink with anyway!!!!! Bah humbug.

is there such a thing as ovulation rage? i wonder if i have it...

Can I join please? I'm new but have lurked for a while, I've just been to shy to post before. DP and I have had 2 MCs now. One on 14/6 last year, second on 3/5 this year, both early. First a eight weeks, second at four weeks. We've had the all clear to start ttc again, and seems like AF is looming. We get married at the end of this month, so that's something cheerful.

Thanks ladies. I hope it's a sticky one too and that this is the start to lots of June bfps on here! I'm just setting small milestones. First one is to get to Friday when I'll poa cd digi again to hopefully see it move to 2-3 weeks.

Emki sorry af got you.

Welcome stars sorry you find yourself here but there's lots of support.

I might be a big wet drama queen, who has a melt down at the slightest hitch, but when it comes to people being insensitive or asking awkward questions, I just come straight out and say "yes, I'd love another but I recently had a miscarriage..."
Maybe if people did this often enough, people would stop asking crap questions!
Welcome Stars and please don't be shy. Everyone here is lovely and it's a lovely place to come for support.
Liesl that's fantastic!
Alyant I think Ovulation rage is quite possible. I was definitely a bit stabby at the weekend!

Yay liesl! Congratulations! I'd got a fish out ready to slap you but I'll have to put it away again now

Welcome fluff, you must have a lot of willpower not to have done a pg test yet. We're all obsessed very keen on that here. Do let us know how it goes.

Some good news for me, I went back for my repeat blood test on Sunday and my beta hcg had fallen from 226 to 138, so they are pretty sure my mystery scan object is a cyst and not an ectopic. But they can't rule it out so I have to keep going back every 2 days until my levels are below 20. I'm going to be like a pin cushion! It seems an excessive way to get a BFN, but when I do, DH had better limber up and get ready!

Thanks everyone and you're right saggy - I promised myself I would next time it happened but I just couldn't bring myself to make HER feel awkward by saying I'd just had a miscarriage, I'm too bloody nice!! I will next time though.

That's good news penguinita hopefully you'll be ready for the TTC shagfest soon.

Welcome stars sorry you have been through this too.

I I is it's hard Guff. I can't always manage it. Bizarrely I find it easier with strangers. We had a family gathering with the ILs recently, and I just couldn't manage it!

Somehow I seem to have missed reading a whole bunch of messages before that last post so I'll carry on...

Welcome to you too stars, sorry you find yourself here.

Hope you and DP find a way to talk things through saggy, 22 years is super impressive!

Boo to the wicked witch arriving. But there is a small consolation

Guff I know what you mean, I think people just don't realise sometimes. I cringe now when I think of some of the flippant comments I've made to others in the past. But before TTC I just had no idea of the heartbreak that could be involved. Although I reckon that a mum with two kids should know better.

A friend with a newborn asked me if we were thinking of having a family a couple of days ago. I just told her the truth; it actually felt good not to be all secretive and she was great about it. I appreciate that you can't do that with everyone though!

Thanks everyone for the warm welcome, and yes katatonic, plenty of mumsnet wine will be offered

guff, I'm really sorry about that, some people really are so self-obsessed that they just don't think about how what they say might affect anyone else. I have a newly pregnant family member like that, except I sometimes feel she crows about her "success" deliberately. Ah rats, perhaps that's just me being bitter and unfair though, she did announce her pregancy (she was 4.5 wks at the time) the day after we had our most recent MC (which she knew about) I just though she could have waited a couple of days. I hope she never has to know how harrowing it is to lose a baby

saggy, 22 years is really good going, really hope you and DP can talk everything through

22 years isn't that special. We got together when I was 16!

Just a quick one to say liesl that's fab news so happy for you :)

welcome stars, sorry to hear about your mcs, but a wedding to look forward to is wonderful

excellent news penguin, I hope they don't have to stab you too many more times.

wow saggy i'm impressed by both 22 years and getting together at 16. What a lovely story.

So this morning I got another high fertility flashing smiley instead of a peak smiley. That's 3 in a row now (the packet suggests that one-two is common) and I really thought that I should have ovulated today... Hmm.... does that mean a. it missed my LH surge or b. I'm not ovulating this month? or c. i ovulate later than i thought? or d. the ptests are a complete waste of money?
so confusing

alyant are you taking your bbt as well? An LH surge can be anywhere between 12-48 hours. I assume the peak shows up when it detects LH? FWIW, the CBFM goes high when it detects estrogen, then peak when it detects LH. But it also shows an extra day of peak after it detects LH because our egg can live for about a day afterwards. So maybe yours doing this as well? If you are also taking your bbt, then you will see a sharp rise of temperature at ovulation. The two should confirm each other's reading. I find it very reassuring. Also you can check your ewcm.