The Genuine BESH Palais. To misquote Carlsberg, we're probably the barrenest TTC-ers in the world...

[HesterShaw]

We are Barren. We are Evil, on account of having left procreating until our 30s. We are Selfish, thinking only of careers and money and cars and holidays. And lastly, we are Hags. Welcome to the BESH gin palace. Babydusters and instadiffers need not apply.

Happy burfday frank!

HWCA is very similar to my ex, both tend towards muscular (although HWCA is also a little rounded over his muscles, they are most definitely there), dark curly hair, Roman noses, and stubborn as all hell. So despite my ex being female, I apparently have a very definite type.

Morning Gorgeous Hags

frank burpy halfday to you (a Dad joke - love it). Are you doing anything nice for it ?

raff when is your lap ? It makes you feel so much better when things happen, doesn't it ?

twonks I saw the review of ST in the paper yesterday and thought of you. Apparently it's very good. Is that right ?

Gently but playfully tweaks the nips of everyone else and sprinkles fish flavoured edible glitter everywhere.

Norks x

Fanks hags, you're not such an evil bunch after all

Off for a dance lesson shortly, then to the hat hire place to sort out my Ascot hat and then Star Trek tonight

twonks twonks twonks QUICK QUICK QUICK new ST film to be shot in the UK. It says it on the news so it must be true.

franks dance for me baby. Dance like the wind.

I am twinkly and I am a Geek

This isn't in relation to any one particular thread, but...

JUST PEE ON A FUCKING STICK, HOW THE HELL WOULD ANYONE ON THE INTERNET KNOW???

Sorry. Needed to get that off my chest. I think I might create a web page that just says that, and link to it on every single 'lolz hubby n me dtd 3 times n we r ttc r first bubz cud i be pg?' thread.

I have been perusing threads a lot the last couple of days. I now know far far more about pus and parasites than I ever wanted to.

DolomitesDonkey had an ace answer to one such question, winks - she advised the person to pee on the keyboard and the internet would tell her.

norks it's the new Star Wars film that'll be shot in the UK. I am Disappointed.

twonks oh fucking hell. I am sorry. I just saw the word 'star' and assumed it would have the word Trek after it with the fillum just being released and rushed to post. Please don't be disappointd. I can't bear it.

This afternoon I have restocked my holiday wardrobe. In Tescos. The French are going to slaughter my fat lily-white badly clothed ass, aren't they.

Fuck the French. Have never found them particularly stylish anyway, with their stripy t shirts and onions round their necks.

Ascot hat sorted. It's a whopper, but if you're going to do Ladies Day you might as well make a statement

I sometimes wish I had an event to buy a big hat for but the chances are I'd look at massive twat. I'm really not a hat person.

Evening BESH, just back from hols. Still barren and no hope this month as I failed at having the sechs. Hope you're all doing better than me. Don't worry, have cracked the wine gin

Can we see the hat pliz? I've got a massive head, hats just don't fit me.

Oh and had a mini scroll and need to point out to Frank that Grohl is mine, ALL MINE (although would also not be too put out by being left with Taylor)

Did you have some lovely hols despite barrenness, Merk? Hope so..

And yes plz to hat pic also.

Oh BESH, I am having a freak out. I am so desperately not wanting this surgery. I'm really scared of general anaesthetic - last time I came round screaming. I'm so scared that they'll find out lumperdinck is evil and take my womb out, and that whichever result comes from the dye job, it'll mean more tests and invasions and crap. I've been trying so hard to be brave and pretend it's all fine and now I'm stuck at work by myself going all wobbly.
Any words fish of comfort much welcomed.

Lovely Moll, just holding your hand. Tis scary I know. But the chances are you will be fine because they have said so. And they can't whip out your womble unless not doing so is life threatening in the short term. WHICH IT WON'T BE.

Thanks Hest.

I'm amending my crush of shame on my BESHtionnaire - Jake from Avatar. He's blue FFS.

Ps, no problem Moll. Tis natural to be scared. You should have seen the gibbering mess I was before my HSG.

cap re general. I was petrified with my first (due to not wanting to die and also horrific big fear of being sick when I woke up). Talk to your anaesthetist who can give you different drugs so you are calm and not ill when you wake... Honestly changed my fear entirely as I woke up shivering but no sickness and entirely calm. Stress how scared you are, it's their job to make you more comfortable and its entirely possible. Other than that, be brave, the being wheeled in and the countdown are awful but they only last for seconds and after that its all done. I'm behind so when is it? It will be fine, promise.
Hols were luffly, combination of dirty weekend with VVTM then girls hol (repeat of hen do) when he had to go home to work. Cheap, hot, beautiful villa and hilarious instance on a boat when a Russian Middle Ages bloke stripped off to his red speedos without realising his (large) left bollock was hanging out of his pants in an obvious manner. Have not laughed so much in years!!

Clearly the Russian was middle aged and not from the Middle Ages although that may have added to the hilarity