The Genuine BESH Palais. To misquote Carlsberg, we're probably the barrenest TTC-ers in the world...

[HesterShaw]

We are Barren. We are Evil, on account of having left procreating until our 30s. We are Selfish, thinking only of careers and money and cars and holidays. And lastly, we are Hags. Welcome to the BESH gin palace. Babydusters and instadiffers need not apply.

Sailing scares the shit out of me. It's fine once you get going, but the first setting up sails flappy bit frightens me half to death. I have no idea why. I really should get HOTB to sell our boat, I doubt we're ever going to really use it...

And YAY Star Trek, Twinks! On those lines - thanks for the link, Frank! Did you see the gorgeous Chris Pine/Karl Urban red carpet hug at the Australian premiere? They are two smiley gorgeous fuckers

Ryan Air are cunts.

Euro, it wasn't too scary at the time, to be honest, but then oxygen deprivation will do that to you. HOTB really should have called an ambulance, especially as the fuckwit GP later dismissed it as hayfever... Allergy specialist had no doubts, though! My epipen is now out of date and because there's no obvious cause I'm not allowed to get a replacement, but I still carry it with me everywhere just in case. It's far more frightening after the fact - for months whenever my heart rate went up I got very worried, but have mostly got over it now :)

We were five minutes late for check in once when flying back from some obscure shithole in France. Even though I could pretty much touch the queue the other side of the gate, they wouldn't let us on. We have to pay £400 extra to fly back to another airport in the UK, hire a car to drive back to the airport we had flown from in order to pick up our car.

They are definitely cunts. But they are the only cunts who fly direct from the UK to the airport that is a 20 min drive from the PIL's place, so we use them whenever we go there. As long as you obey the stupid rules, it's fine.

Hest you emerged! How are you doing? That is enormously shit, hest. I've heard a lot of similar stories and more worryingly stuff about them sailing close to the wind in terms of fuel on board. But, I'll sacrifice a lot for convenience.

draf what a strange incident. I don't blame you for carrying the epipen!

I am officially Up and Down, Euro.

I want a baybeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee to hold and cuddle. I have Empty Arm Syndrome.

Empty ArmS that should be.

I think Empty Arm was about right. Most people on here use one arm for the baybee and the other for MNing.

Ryan Air charged me shed loads of money for being a tiny bit over the weight limit - every other fuckers gives you a 20kg limit, not them, oh no, but I assumed - then I had a fly-for-free, weighed a shitload more than my baggage 'excess' toddler next to me, pulling my hair and climbing on me for the duration of the flight

Oh. That tugged at my heartstring. :(

Gosh. My reply there was callous. Sorry hest :(

Sorry Euro. Here, have this fishslap instead.

Didn't think it was callous so much as true, Winks. Dunno how on earth these women do it, especially seeing as most of them claim to be wall to wall breastfeeding until their offspring starts school

Empty arm just makes me - 14:00 to 14:25 ish

As soon as I clicked on that and saw the title "Hancock's Half Hour" I knew what you mean. That's very nearly an armful!

Old skool, draf.

Twink the worst is when the flight is delayed so they use the extra time to piss people off by doing things like weighing and measuring hand luggage.

Thanks hest. I feel better for that. :)

Hurrah, not that callous! It makes me laugh so much.

I'd like a Huge Ackman plz.

I have nothing more useful to contribute this evening.

Who was it who suggested a Hugh Jackman fred? I'm well up for that. We can stab instadiffers through the throat with our adamantium blade-claws. Not that I like ultra-violence or anything...

I did my first run of week 2 today. Ouch!

I was thinking more of just shagging him. We could all have a go. Me first though.

Don't tire him out too much eh?

Well done frank. Don't forget to stretch.

My cousin had her baybee this morning. I'm at home this weekend, I'll be expected to visit. I don't want to.

Um right. TWinks do we actually know each other. Because my SIL had her baby this morning also

OK, we don't know each other. More than one baby born on the same day? Remarkable.

One born every minute and all that.

So, passive aggressive gifts. Maternity pads, nipple cream, a jar of coffee for those sleepless nights?

Ah yes, we'll talk about it here.
So....

lavender oil for shredded fanjo
Pro plus
Red Bull
Kalms
Rescue Remedy
earplugs
pile cream