TTC 10 + months, part 14 (eek)

[GinSoaked]

A friendly, supportive thread for lovely ladies taking waaay longer than they ever expected to win their babies

gin - what? eh? what? updiffed? hoorah! that's just marvellous news. congratulations!

All quiet here as I am taking woo doc's advice to take a couple of months out and get warm and ready for IVF.

What are you doing to get warm free? I'm a bit worried I haven't done anything to prepare even though I've been waiting for this for 3 years. What should. I Be doing? Day 1 today so first injection on Friday.

Gin still smiling at your news. Do you think it's true that fet are better?

joycep you are not being sensitive, I think we just have good days and bad days. I had a few sensitive days really. Easter Sunday with the church full of the kids of people I grew up with, instead of celebrating Easter and counting my blessings, I was blinking back tears thinking It's not fair. And a preggers annoucement at work, and another colleague said - "you'll be next free" and I was almost crying again. Why? Why would they say that? I have never said anything about kids at all at work. It just gets to you sometimes. Just let it out if it gets too much and move past the moment. Big hugs to you.

mrsden eating well, exercising, and some woo stuff like hot foot baths before bed, drinking chinese herbs, ginger tea, chai tea, eating nothing cold. but mostly relaxing and not taking any drugs. I am enjoying a little break from the prodding and poking (apart from the acupuncture).

That egg-meets-sperm-implants-low-HCG-possible-ectopic-ending-in-megaheavy-period nonsense a couple of weeks ago left us feeling a bit disappointed (surprisingly MrFree too this time) so we're just taking it easy for a while.

Sounds sensible free. I'm trying out the eat lots of chocolate to ensure pregnancy diet.

ha! excellent mrsden I'll cross my fingers for you.

Poor little poorly rob. :(

I feel like my period is imminent and have had a tiny bit of spotting, so it looks like I will soon be on my last cycle before IVF#2. I'm quite impressed with my body's belligerence and apparent determination not to be knocked off course by the mc. Ov was a day or so late, and it looks like my luteal phase will be about 11 days, so slightly short, but not bad at all considering what my body has been through. So that gives me a month to sort myself out and then we will be off again. If things hadn't got back to normal, another natural cycle would have been difficult, if not impossible, so this is all good.

I hope all the IVFers are doing ok. Critter you are on the way! I think downregging made me spotty, but not that quickly. I'll be about 3 weeks or so behind buzz I reckon, bringing up the rear! It was lovely to have doll as a cycle buddy last time so it's great that so many of us are going so close together.

Hi free. That all sounds terribly healthy. I'm with mrsd on the chocolate diet at the moment...

Free - I am hardly suprised you both feel dissapointed after what you have gone through. Aww, big hugs. I know exactly what you mean about being places where everyone has children - it makes me well up to. I feel like the odd-ball of the group. And the reality is, people do feel for sorry for us becuase they know the joys of having children and feel we are missing out. But I don't think they fully understand the grief and despairthat fertility issues themselves bring. It sounds like you have a good plan and do keep up the good work with the warming up treatment.

Den- don't worry at all about what you should do or not do leading up to IVF. I think we all know instinctivley what pre-steps we need to take (or not) iyswim. Finding a way that enables you to relax, a way for you to distract yourself and a way to be kind to yourself is the most important of all. It will be fine, I promise. Chocolate diet - I am with you on that one. Currently after the new thing here - a block of chocolate malteser style - mmmm, want one now!!!

Gin - How are you today? Have you told anyone in rl? I am just so thrilled for you both. Goodness knows you two deserved some luck and have more than earned this. There is no reason to think anything is wrong with the embryo. Not all embryos are text book - there is a range of normal and that is 100% ok. I am a good example of beautiful embryos going nowhere. I really hope you are starting to feel less scared and more relaxed but I know that may take some time. I wish I could meet up with you in person and give you a big reassuring squeeze. Also, I am glad for the sake of this thread that you have shown FET and IVF in general can be a success. My reperated fails make the whole thing look a bit hopeless. But it certainly is not lovely Gin. You did it!!!

Buzz - I have been thinking about you. I hope you are ok and not experiencing any horrid side effects. I got big and sudden gungy bleeds with down regging. And I was very tired too. But other than that it was fine. How is Mr Buzz dealing with it all?

Euro - I am sorry that your AF may show but hoorah for sensible cycles post mc. Mine are like that too. Even after IVF they make a good come back, we are lucky. I agree that it may be transport issues for you and Barry based on what you describe (mild MF and ewcm ishoos). I wonder if that means you are truely in the unexplained catagory?? I do hear what you are saying about 80% fragmentation ishoos but I still think there may be other more logical causes. I think you art right about returning to the preseed during natural cycles. As much as poss placed you know where before you know what . Sorry, to be gross, but I just want you two to be as happy as you deserve to be.

Critter - how are things with the stabbing and the jabbing? Thank you for your advice about clomid. I guess you are right, after what I have been through it won't be such a big jump. But selfishly I do worry about the weight gain thing. As to why I will be taking it (assuming tubes are ok) I think you are right it is partly to do with timming ovulation perfectly (I don't know if that can be monitored and predicted better than with a nautral cycle) because I have always ovulated easily on my own. But it is also simply to give the swimmers more target practice as tubes which are a little less than perfect such as mine may have a slightly harder time capturing the egg, or wafting the egg or sperm. Also if one tube is weaker than the other it gives conception slightly more chance if an egg comes from each side I guess. I think it literally justs boosts the chances. However I am going to ask Prof Tubes for more specifics about it as I have gleened this myself so could be wrong.

Joy - How are you feeling just now? Did that a+ annoucement ever materialise? I hope you are well and looking forward to your fancy holiday which is muched deserved. Any more test results back or discussions?

Pout - are you ok my lovely? Are you managing to forget about TTC for a bit until the FET? Now we know how succesful it is you have every reason to be positive. I have read very good things about it indeed.

Angel - so sorry you are going throught this sweetheart. It is the pits I know. The reality is that it is highly highly likely that you will get a baby. When - that is the hard part. I would advise you to do those initial basic tests (hopefully just for some reassurance) and then consider ways to try and be kinder to yourself and take the pressure off. iam sorry about the mc - that is very hard indeed. I am better at giving advice than following it myself course.

I am back - just had to go and give our tea a stir - turkey mince chilli con carne and roasted sweet potatos - our favourite. It is ver ver rock and roll in this house.

Despite the uncertainty about my job work has been very very hectic. I am not quite in Euro or Rabbit's league for working mahoooosivly long hours but I am certainly getting to cut my teeth in the world of supervision and staffing ishoos. I am a bit tired but I have a long weekend coming up and then a 2 week break in May. We should be planning some holidays but I'm not sure we can now that I am paying for this private TTC treatment with Dr Tubes, plus the job threat. But we shall see. I still have a good look at groupon and laterooms to see if there is a sneaky get away I can grab.

It is 12 dpo for me - don't feel at all preggo. This is my second natural cycle post surgery. I did feel a bit preggo during my first cycle. Damn it, I was supposed to be fixed by now. I also have a severe case of progesterone poo aka constipation in the leutal phase. Really not good. I have a night at in the 'pool on Saturday with 2 wonderful, babyless and much younger friends and I really don't want to have progesterone poo by then but can't shift it. Ideas????

Hello lovely 10 plussers- long time no speak! I'm sorry that it has been months since I posted, or have even read this thread. Once you leave it for a week or two it's impossible to catch up! But I still think about you lots and do lots of non-religious prayers for you all.

I'm sooooo thrilled to read gins news- absolutely amazing! You have been through so much and this is so well deserved!

From what I've read I'm sorry to see that some of the little beans didn't make it. Totally heartbreaking. You are such strong ladies and this will happen for you.

Lots of you seem to be really moving forward with tests, scans and treatment. I have absolutely everything crossed for you and hope there is another run of BFPs soon.

All is going well here. 28 weeks now and is starting to feel real. After 2.5 years of googling mentalness I have totally avoided it in pregnancy, including MN, which has been a lovely change! I still struggle with instadiffs and feel like a barren at heart but at the same time, weirdly, i wouldn't change what I've been through....if only I'd had a crystal ball!

Anyway, I just wanted to pop in and say hello and to also say that I still really appreciate the support I got on this thread when I really had no one else to turn to. You're a fab bunch- here's hoping for lots more good news very soon!

Much love x

Hi everyone? just popping in to say hi.

Euro ? I?m sorry to hear about the mix up with your smear. How frustrating? You do wonder sometimes how everything functions with missing letters and appointments etc.

You mentioned a few posts ago that you read somewhere that DNA frag issues are found in 80% of cases of unexplained. Do you happen to know where I can find that article? Also, would you test to DNA frag with the Karotyping tests? Sorry for the questions but I am about to have quite a few tests done before embarking on my 1st IVF and want to be as informed as possible?

Gin ? Have are you feeling? Has it all sunk in yet? I laughed at your comment about friends who are baby are Boden-ised? I have never shopped there but they keep sending me catalogues for some reason!

Angel ? Sorry you find yourself here but as others have said you do have time on your side. I know it doesn?t feel like it now but it could well happen when you least expect it. Sensible to have tests done early on though? Good luck.

Nelly ? hope all the stabbing is okay. I don?t know how you ladies do it? Quite nervous for when it?s my turn.

Buzz ? How are you feeling? No more wobbles I hope.

Joy ? Was there an announcement from your friend? Hope you don?t receive anymore thoughtless scan pics via email. The more I thought about that, the more it seemed very wrong.

Critter ? well done on the stabbing. Hope the spots stay away. Pls excuse me if I get the terminology re IVF a bit wrong as I am still trying to learn the difference between downreging, stimming etc.

Madness ? Well done on the run. I really want to get back to exercise but with all the upcoming IVF madness I don?t know how to fit it all in. I think it might just be yoga for me. I feel so unfit.

Freedom ? good luck with the woo warming. Remember lots of ginger, no cold drinks, lots of soups/broths and no walking around barefoot with no socks/slippers. I am slightly obsessed with Chinese meds so I repeat all these like a mantra. What are your next plans? I remember you did IUI, will IVF be your next step?

Mrsd ? at chocolate diet!

Sarlat ? Re prog poo problem. Have you tried Linseeds soaked in water and drinking all of it in one go. I also find lemon hot water works for me in the morning. I hope you are wrong about natural cycle and you get a surprise positive.

Frannie ? Haven?t met you before but can tell you are a grad. How nice to see success stories from this thread. Always gives me hope. Hope you are enjoying a drama free pregnancy.

28 weeks? blimey.

I dunno sar - the mc would support the presence of frag issues.

sea this was the article:
www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1110569013000137
It was also reported in the mainstream press (daily fail, etc) last year and discussed on here.

I had a bit of drama last night. As I came home from the office, I spotted a neighbour's door open. It turned out she had been burgled. :( Mr Euro and I tried to help out with calling the police, finding a locksmith, etc. I don't think they took much other than a couple of laptops, but it was really unnerving for them. And it has made me nervous for us too - we are right opposite and there is a history of tight clusters of burglaries round our way. We were planning to replace our burglar alarm (has never worked) and put an additional look on the front door anyway and have already got quotes and so on. We'd better get on with it.

euro about discovering burglary. That's horrible. What an awful and unsettling feeling. Your poor neighbours.

sea don't worry at all about the terminology. It's something that's impossible to get your head around until you actually have to do it! I remember my friend talking to me about downregging and blastos about a year ago, and having no idea what she was talking about! I was trying to explain the process to my sister last night as she kept on referring to it as 'the insemination' and I could tell she was glazing over within about fifteen seconds!

frannie yay, can't believe you're 28 weeks! Your pregnancy has flown by. So lovely to see you back here - do pop in and update us when you feel like it, and of course after your little one arrives! Good for you on the no-googling.

sar sorry you don't feel preggo this time. You have a plan now, and I really think your time is going to come soon. Incidentally don't worry about weight gain on clomid. I gained ,more weight after my cancelled injectables cycle - I only put on about two or three pounds on clomid. Especially if you're eating yummy healthy food like turkey chili and sweet potatoes, you should be fine. Childless friends are crucial for sanity's sake - I hope you have a lovely weekend with them. And if you can get a break next month or a last minute deal, grab it with both hands! You and Chumba deserve some nice time together.

It's been quiet on here. Where is everyone?

I'm excited that so many people are on an exciting journey of ivf. I think I'm excited and scared in equal measure to lose my ivf virginity later this year. Who knows if Ill get any nhs treatment, the fsh may well be a sticking point. I'm hoping I find this out before I go through the actual menopause Whatever happens I WILL be having a go at ac this year, ridiculous cervix permitting.

pout poor robin

euro so sorry to hear about the burglary, that's a horrible thing and no wonder its unsettled you. Lock is a good plan.

sar how's the progesterone situation? There was a whole thread on that before! If I ever get in that situation, which is only ever when I'm in pmt phase I swear by lactulose. Sorry for lack of symptoms.

frannie lovely to see you 28 weeks! I'm glad you've been able to ditch dr google. And if you ever find that crystal ball...

critter how's it feeling after initial jabbing?

gin your last post made me hope you stay for a bit.

Big old wave to doll

free here is a big squeeze. It's no surprise at all that you feel disappointed, you've been on a right roller coaster so taking it easy is important.

nelly I liked your tale of ivf no 2. How's it going?

thinking of buzzy, mrsden, sea, joy and anyone else missed.

I am immersed in yoga of all temperatures and I'm feeling very good and also shattered, in a nice way. Spag Bol and game of thrones and a glass of white tonight.

rabbit it's great that you're doing lots of yoga and your evening sounds perfect - white wine and tv, brilliant! I'm doing a pilates class this evening, I'm looking forward to it. Always feels good to do some physical exercise.

Stabbing is going fine, I am still on BCP with lupron until Tuesday, then I guess I'll get a period and have my first u/s and blood test on Thursday morning before adding in the stimming drugs. I have been spotting pretty much constantly for the past two weeks and it's finally stopped, which is good. And I'm feeling a bit tired and sluggish, but the weather here is stunning, and I have a lovely weekend coming up - dinner with girlfriends tonight, pilates, gardening, and maybe a run down to the Mall to look at the last of the cherry blossom. Mr C is off on a stag weekend tomorrow morning, so I am also looking forward to having the run of the place, and giving our flat a really good spring clean! Anyone else got nice things happening this weekend?

I was also going to say rabbit that it's awesome that you have a plan. We will be here to hand hold if you do get to IVF this year!

It has been very quiet.

Critter am I going to miss the tail end of the blossoms then? If so I will have managed to visit just either side of them!

I love having the place to myself occasionally. I'm not sure I'd look forward to the spring cleaning though!

rabbit the yoga and the plan sound great.

How's everyone else? sar any update?

AFM, AF is definitely here. Unfortunately, dates mean that my next ov will be right in the middle of my next work trip, so that'll be two months with no chance. And then back to IVF. TBH, I've pretty much lost faith that it could ever happen naturally anyway, so I am not as bothered as I thought I might be about missing a second egg.

First injection today and of course it couldn't be straight forward. I'm supposed to be on dose of 125, my pen doesn't have that degradation on it. So I've had to go lower at 112.5 hoping I can get though to the clinic tomorrow to find out what I should do.

Sorry the witch got you euro.

Just a quickie...

euro sorry bout the badly timed red witch arrival and burglary. I'm sure they won't come back have a baseball bat under the bed just in case

mrsd just wanted to say my doses were 112.5 and 150 alternatively, so sounds like you've done the right thing!

Waves to all, esp the awesome foursome. Will catch up properly at le weekend.

Thanks gin, that's made me feel better. I've been in floods of tears thinking I've ruined it already. The pen they showed us in the clinic was different. I don't know why I didn't check if before tonight. The injection was good though, didn't even feel it. Dh is being very kind to me, think he's feeling guilty.

How are you doing? Has the news sunk in yet?

I'm not letting myself believe it until the viability scan! I'm a total bag of nerves and still pretty emotional. I actually cried this morning at euro's lovely fred about Robert Edwards! The dose with be fine and you can just do a higher one tomorrow. We screwed up our first ever stabbing, as Dave didn't actually press the plunger down properly.

Night ladies.

Where's the frd about Robert Edwards? A truly great man.

MrsD I am sure it will be fine, and that's a small variation on what they said on just the first day. I managed to inject myself yesterday before I'd turned the pen at all - so I stabbed myself then pushed the plunger and nothing happened . Had to take it out, dial it up, put a new needle in, and stab myself again. I'm such a wally.... Anyway well done on the first injection, it definitely gets easier afterwards.

Madness how are you getting on? We are all quite close together aren't we? Still bet you all beat me to theatre

Critter the blossom sounds beautiful. The grass hasn't even started growing here and my garden still looks in shock.

Gin I say hurrah for emotional!

Rabbit you sound in a better place re AC. I still quietly hope you won't need it though.

Euro that's rubbish about the timing of your OV. Nature really does love to throw the curve balls at us. Perhaps though, clutching at silver linings and mixing metaphors, this gives your body another month to repair after the MC? I know you said it's fought it's way back fairly quickly, but let's face it, none of us have a ruddy clue what's going on in there!

Hello to everyone else. Where is Lemon, isn't her lovely long holiday up by now? Is anyone friends with her on the other site? I hope she's ok. And everyone else too.

Tis late so must go to bed but will catch up tomorrow.

Well done on the first stab mrsden the first is the most difficult. nelly i could really relate to your post 'bout stabbing in the kitchen. It's really different the second time right? For me some things were easier and some things harder. Strangely I had a little sob in the waiting room for EC the second time. 'Twas my only IVF sob. Ken had just popped to the loo and when he came back I was wiping my eyes. He was very surprised and asked 'is it because I went to pee?' Yes, yes that was it twat I'm glad to hear Mrden is treating you well mrsd milk it for all it's worth I say and do Sorry to hear you are not in the same clinic nelly and mad that would have been fun.

critter I love the cherry blossom season, I know DC tops NY for that, but I loved the season when I was there.

euro sorry to hear your news, break-in, period and second cycle mess up with work. My post IVF cycles didn't workout either one way and another. It's a drag.

sar great news on moving forward with HSG and Dr Tubes. Sorry to hear about the work problems though. That must be very hard.

Ok, my time is up for now, lovely to see you here frannie happy warming free waves to all rabbit joy sea pout buzzy lemon (are you out there?) gin and ginlit...x

Euro -what a horrible shock for you and your neighbour.

Gin -awww tears are normal. Hope all is well with you and the wonderful news is sinking in.

Den - don't worry at all, there will be room for margin of error with this. But you likely haven't done it wrong. Did you get to speak to a nurse?

Rabbit-I am with you. Last night I played badminton (badly) then had left over chili and a glass of red wine.

Hello lovely doll, the super energy super glossy 2nd trimester is just around the corner.

Sea - thank you for your good advice, I did have some linseeds so gave it a go and it has helped.

Thank goodness as I am out on the 'pool (large north west city) tonight and plan to wear the new maxi dress and wedges.

Hello to all. Xx

Buzz-you ok my sweet?

Morning everyone!

I have been trying to read on the run but very short of time so just a quick catch up post.

mrsd I'm sure your stabbing worries aren't a big deal. I hope that you managed to get through to speak to someone who could put your mind at rest.

euro we had a break in at old flat (it really was a rather rough neighbourhood!) and it was hugely unsettling. Glad that your place was spared but totally handstand the desire for more security afterwards. I came home to the kicked in door and was too frightened to go in so just waited in the street for the police and MrM to get there. I am also sorry for the bad timing of af but envious of your repeat trips to see Critter .

Nelly I don't have a pen to dial up at all. I am curious about your dispute with consultant in the east. I haven't had any contact with the man in charge but my endometriosis specialist is there so feel a bit more confident knowing that they can discuss my case with him and I can call his secretary if I think they're doing something dodgy. That said I think he might also do some work for the west clinic so wouldn't make much difference. These guys do get around!!!

critter your weekend sunds great. I like having the bed to myself from time to time and my spring clean made me feel so much better. Cleaning the house makes me feel so much more in control. If only I could get myself to do it a bit more frequently :)

AFM I have now done two days of self stabbing and it has been alright. The needle doesn't really hurt at all but I'm on a really high dose of stimming drugs so it is taking me ages to mix up the injection. I'm on 300iu of menopur daily and 0.5ml of buserelin. Does anybody know if they keep you on the downregging drugs to stop ovulation? I hadn't expected to still be taking it at the same time as stims. My first buserelin injection went a bit pear shaped as I mucked up changing the needles after extracting it from the bottle and then couldn't depress the plunger when I put it in. There was some blood so maybe I was just unlucky and nicked something??? Second attempt was fine though and this morning went smoothly. Made MrM watch and then guilted him into making me breakfast ;). Interestingly clinic gave me no advice whatsoever about diet during the cycle. I'm drinking loads of water and fruity teas, skipping the caffeine and alcohol and may drink a few glasses of milk for good measure. Nothing too extreme but it's making me feel better to be doing something. Talk to me again if and when we get to round two and I'm sure it will be different!

Sorry not to mention you all but if I waited until I had time for a full on catch up I wouldn't be back for days. Thinking of you all and hoping that we have happy and relaxed weekends.