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Original poster

Ttc after recent mc, for Creme egg scoffers, shared confusion and joint cursing of mother nature

955 replies

Thundercatsarego · 06/02/2013 21:32

I couldn't bring myself to call her a bitch, we still need her help! Come on ladies, let's do this thing....

OP posts:
ChocolateCremeEggBag · 10/02/2013 20:13

Ta Da!!!!!

And now back to the Wine, hope this week brings everyone lots of smiles (opks, BFP's, cards, chocolates whatever)

JBrd · 10/02/2013 21:00

Camomile and bzzbee You're both ahead of me with the job hunting! I'm still fretting about what to do next/where to go/how this 'career change' that I am envisaging is actually going to happen. I'm nowhere near to applying for jobs yet, sadly Sad - but oh so near to handing in my notice regardless Confused, it's that bad.

Camo is right, we do deserve jobs that we like! It's where we spend most of our time, after all. Well, it feels like it for me, even though I work 80%. But of course they still expect me to do the same amount of work as a full-time position. Just printed out about 10 pages meeting preparation notes for a meeting tomorrow morning - which got sent around today! So annoyed Angry

Bodicea I never had any follow-up from my PE than a chest x-ray and meeting with respiratory consultant after 6 months. The haematologist saw me once, changed me from being on warfarin (wasn't working) to clexane and then released me from his care.
They think my PE was caused by birth control pill, which I had just started taking again a few months earlier. That with my age (then 40) and weight (almost 3st heavier than I am now), as there were no other factors like family history or previous dvt.
I have been thinking about this in the last few weeks, but it didn't occur to me at the time that all this could have something to do with the mc... And I imagine that it will be difficult to determine. But I will make an appointment with my GP to request the thrombophilia screen and the aspirin. I will do anything to avoid another mc.

And I would like for af to show up!

IBelieveInPink · 10/02/2013 22:29

Hi all. Hope you have all had good/bearable weekends (delete as appropriate for mood!)
I had a lovely time away, was too scared to go in spa bit in case af found me and I had a Laura Ashley moment, but made the most of the yummy food and wine!
And as if to welcome me home, af made an appearance this evening. So am officially back on track now, end of wtf cycle after mc number 2, and back to the start again. Scary, but feeling positive for the moment. We shall see how long that continues!!!

SpanishLady · 11/02/2013 12:30

sounds like you had a great time Ibelieve - thats is very good!

May I ask how long you waited for this AF? presuming this is the first since what happened that sadly brought you to this thread?

SpanishLady · 11/02/2013 12:32

Camomile - it is very unfair and I am sorry but you didnt say that the Drs think this would prevent you from having a baby - right? so I'd grab tightly onto that!

Hope you feel better soon through as its easier to think clearly when you feel well.

CamomileHoneyVanilla · 11/02/2013 12:44

Thanks for the support guys.

I'm feeling better today. Pain/bleeding etc have reduced alot since yesterday and I have come in to work and its proving to be nice and distracting. I'm a bit confused about the whole uterus thing so am going to just book an appointment with my GP in a few weeks for clarification and forget about it in the mean time.

I think it didn't help being told during the miscarriage when its harder to think rationally and calmly about things. I'm better now - apologies for being histrionic.

Bodicea · 11/02/2013 12:45

CamomileI don't know how sever your bicornuate is but I see plenty of ladies take their pregnancies to term. I don't know about the stats but we never really make a big thing of it. I prefer he term normal variant to malformation as well. Please don't think that this is going to be a major problem for you and you are able to enjoy your next pregnancy xxxx

BumpKitty · 11/02/2013 13:27

camomile do not worry about venting with us, you have been through a huge ordeal and we're all here to listen and support each other. I'm so sorry you had such a horrendous time in hospital. It sounds like you're doing the best thing in seeing your GP and getting more clued up, if your GP is crap then ask for a referral to a specialist.
z thanks for the sperm meets egg plan, I was flailing a bit thinking I wasn't getting anywhere with my methods so it's good to try something else. CD 9 here so first dtd last night and starting on the opks tomo :) good luck everyone

BumpKitty · 11/02/2013 13:30

And sorry to those of you with crap jobs, mine isn't that inspiring but it suits at the moment. jbrd I've left a job with nothing to go to as it was so awful, I'm not sure I'd recommend it though. I did get another job pretty quickly but nowhere near the same pay etc. it is much easier toget a job when you already have one x

grotbagz · 11/02/2013 18:09

Thanks bodicea - I'm going to look into it! Glad they're being helpful for you though!

Feeling much better today so I have just got my treadmill out and if I didn't have respiratory problems before I'm sure I will do now after cleaning off the thick layer of dust. I also bought some jillian michaels DVDs in the hope of her inspiring me but she appears to be a lunatic and i want to be toned NOW so I'm not sure how far ill get with that.. Enthusiasm is high clearly! Help?

grotbagz · 11/02/2013 18:10

And camo glad you're feeling better!

3sthenew2 · 11/02/2013 19:31

I'm giving this baby aspirin thing doe serious consideration now. Just wondering if its called baby aspirin? Thought I'd better check as I thought you couldn't get it anymore due to not being able to give aspirin to babies! I've only had 1 mc but want to do everything I can to prevent another one, if it happens again I don't think we'll try for a third time.
Cam; I hear you on being psyched up for a year off. I'm trying desperately to get back into work, I was feeling very smug at the thought of not having to do my turn on the christmas rota this year and if we're not blessed thus month I guess I'll have no excuse.

diyqueen · 11/02/2013 19:32

Hi everyone, just popping in to say hello, been lurking and reading but nothing worthwhile to add, am feeling pretty low at the moment and don't just want to come on and whinge. ibip I'm glad the wait is over... Hope for better luck for you this month.
Hello camo and spanishlady, sorry you find yourselves here too.

JanieLovesHerThreeLeggedCat · 11/02/2013 20:17

hey girls, jut been hanging at the sidelines. sorry to hear some of you are having a shitty time... i also hate my job, so if you find a good one, be sure to keep me posted :) ibip glad (in a 'at least you know where you are' way) that AF arrived and didn't ruin your nice weekend :)

have we got anyone getting ready to poas?

i'm off to have a hot cross bun

Zeuxippe · 11/02/2013 20:37

Hi everyone. camo I'm so sorry to hear about your ordeal in hospital. It sounds as if asking your doctor about everything they told you is a good route to go down.

thunder thanks for letting me know you had that exhausted/achey feeling too. My doctor actually agreed to let me have blood tests even though this was my first miscarriage so am going to get tested tomorrow morning. I don't think they'll do the full set of tests but should at least cover thyroid/anaemia/diabetes in case any of these are a problem.

Sorry to hear so many people are unhappy in their work. I got made redundant from a role last year that I really liked, then redeployed into a new position that is oh so dull!! I had thought it wouldn't matter cos I'd be getting pg straight away but that doesn't look as likely now Sad

IBelieveInPink · 11/02/2013 21:20

Just curious to those being allowed tests after 1 or 2 mcs, was there some specific reason you are being allowed them? I went in and begged, but my doc wouldn't do anything even though I have had 2, just told me I had to wait for a 3rd!!

Spanish - it took 5 weeks for af to come back. Both this time, and the last time.

Zeuxippe · 11/02/2013 21:33

Hi ibip as I said not getting full tests that look at hormone levels thru cycle etc but just a one-off blood test. I said to GP thought I might have low thyroid levels as was permanently cold and weird shivering alll the time before I mcd.

I cried a lot in the appt too, could have helped persuade them?

Bakingtins · 11/02/2013 21:48

Seems to completely vary when you get what tests. Since I ended up on gynae ward for MC2 they did swabs, then they lost them and said I had to go to GP to have them redone. I asked about toxoplasma because of my job (can you believe after 14 yrs working with sick cats I'm not immune) and had TORCH testing for infectious causes of miscarriage and chlamydia swabs. All negative, no answers there. didn't push too much for the clotting etc since I know I can carry to term, assume it's genetic or implantation probs that have caused MC for me.
It does seem to be v dependent on if the GP is sympathetic. I cried too, the hospital had totally panicked me that it was something I'd caught that had caused the MC, didn't appreciate the implication I had an STI....just another example of their crappy communication.

Bakingtins · 11/02/2013 21:50

diyqueen if you can't whinge here, where can you whinge? This is not a thread where you have to be sweetness and light all the time.

diyqueen · 11/02/2013 22:17

I know, just feeling a bit pathetic as not much to complain about really, at least I have gorgeous dd. Just had a low few days, pregnant best friend has just developed a little baby bump, and I saw a friend who started ttc at the same time as me... and has a 6 week old baby. Dp is suffering from stress and is needing some tlc, dd is going through a needy phase and I feel kind of wrung out and daunted at the prospect of months and months of waiting and failing (we may get a miracle but have fertility issues on dp's side).

diyqueen · 11/02/2013 22:28

And am probably hormonal as have what I think is first af, but random stop start bleeding. That probably isn't helping.

Bakingtins · 12/02/2013 07:50

I don't think already having children makes the loss easier - you still wanted the baby you lost and want a sibling for your DD. You do have the advantage of knowing it can work out for you when everything is right, but that's not much consolation when you are grieving a loss and wondering if it will all work out in the future. Don't feel you have no right to complain, there is always someone worse off than you, but that doesn't negate what you are feeling.
Hope your hormones sort themselves out soon, easier to think positive once you know where you are. Hope you have a better day today. Unmumsnetty hugs.

Bodicea · 12/02/2013 09:53

i believe that's horrible to hear. What a knob your gp is. It's just a few blood tests for goodness sake. How heartless to say you have to wait for a third mc. I went though my epau - not had anything to do with gp - think they are useless anyway. Maybe you could try that. If that doesn't work go back and stamp your feet. Or do what zuipe said and try crying ,

CamomileHoneyVanilla · 12/02/2013 09:57

Morning everyone. On day 2 of feeling better (yay). Going back to work definitely the right decision for me. My job isn't bad, actually I really like it, but it is unfortunately not a permanent post (I work bank shifts as a nurse) so lacks job security. The year off I was excited about was more to do with avoiding sorting it all out and getting career back on track. I left my last job before having another one JBrd because it was so awful. It's a difficult one to call really. I'm much happier now but the lack of security and knowing where you're going to be is stressful. I suppose it depends on the field you're in and how often posts similar to yours will come up. Nursing obv has lots of posts so fingers crossed will be ok. Found out i have an interview for that one I applied to the other day which has cheered me up. Fingers crossed.

Bodicea, I prefer normal variant as well. Will be adopting it for now. Thanks for the reassurance that lots of people do fine with one too. Very calming. Are you a doc/nurse/midwife then? (Don't answer if you don't want to).

diy, hope you're feeling better today. I don't have children, but honestly don't believe having one would make the pain of this any easier. As tins says, don't negate the pain of your loss. Look after yourself today. Xx

arigold · 12/02/2013 10:33

ibip my gp said the same - could you perhaps see a different doctor at your practice or is this unlikely to change anything?