Five and the Mystery of the Declining Fertility - the BESH engage the services of the Famous Five to track down their baybees and finish with lashings of ginger beer. Topping!

[ArielThePiraticalMermaid]

Morning everyone, just let me wolf down this amazing meal of tinned tongue, hardboiled eggs and ginger beer (don't you find food always tastes so much better outside?) and we'll toddle off on our latest adventure. We'll make sure Anne does the washing up (you'll make a proper little housewife and no doubt the fecund mother of four fine sons one day Anne ) and us boys can have the proper adventures! No, not you George - you're nearly as good as a boy but not quite. Leave the actual procreating to me and Dick. Woof woof! Shut up Timmy!

I could be twinkletoes for you moll

frank what on earth? Did you try to tattoo yourself? You could be a gnarled old seaman, dispensing clues and tobacco smoke towards our intrepid adventurers.

Oh it wasn't that bad norf, just a a trickle. Oh and at "seaman"

Urgh. Have t try and get to work, but the snow is baaaad. (stranded on th m6 for 7 hours?! No thank you)

Mr Carruthers the caretaker has teen terribly remiss with his snw clearing..

Wish me luck BESH.

seaman

snarfle.

Morning BESH. I'm off to the clinic for my third dildocamming of the week later. Now that never happened in Enid Blyton world.

PS "snigger"

Enjoy your dildocamming, Euro. Three in a week eh, you lucky schlaaaaaaag.

Where is this snow still? Thought we would all be under water by now. FLOOOOOOOOODS! SAVE YOURSELVES!!!!!!!!!!

Drama queen. I always thought that about you Rie. We will just build ourselves a raft and sail away for an adventure.

The dildocamming was fine. They also took blood for an LH test and maanged to spray it all across the room . My follie is growing nicely (17mm now) and it looks like EC will be Wednesday, but I am to have another scan on Monday to make sure.

"Sail away with me BESHes..."

to misquote David Grey.

KFZK had his first dildocamming experience (as an observer, obv). I think he will recover. Eventually. He was going to stay on the other side of the curtain but the sonographer sort of bullied him into it. I think it's not a bad introduction to being there when someone is interfering with me, in case he decides he wants to be there for EC or ET next week.

MrA was fascinated when I had my one and only (thus far). He was staring at the screen and nodding appreciatively when she was pointing stuff out.

I must have had at least two dozen of the things by now. I see more dildocam action than swi these days.

but :(

I am watching racing from Cheltenham. I never watch racing. It's exciting, but I don't like it when they hit the hosses

In Other News, what can I do to make MrA to clear the fuck up after himself. It's SO frustrating. Not just clear up after himself, but NOTICE things? He would no more give the fridge a bit of a clean up than he would fly to the moon. He would no more look at the bathroom and think "Hmm, looking like it needs a clean - I'll do it," than he would don a leotard and dance at Covent Garden. How do you ask them to share the work equally, or even try harder to notice it needs doing without nagging? Even if he says "Sorry, I'll try better," something else will slip. I promise you all I am not a doormat whinger, it's just I hate the sound of my own voice when I am saying "Can you CLEAR THE FUCK UP AFTER YOURSELF, DICKHEAD."

SSG was obsessed with the dildocam scans. I'm also very glad he was there for ET. Euro that was the worst bit for me. Don't believe them when they say it's just like a smear test.

Rie I have the same problem in this house. My solution is twofold: SSG pays for a cleaner & when other stuff needs doing I say, we've got some jobs to do, tell him what needs doing & then say which jobs are you doing? Still doesn't stop me getting annoyed that he NEVER puts the dirty dishes in the dishwasher or EVER notices that washing needs doing.

Do they advise you to take painkillers before the ET, Jethro?

that's not good to hear Jeff. I was pretty relaxed about ET but a bit nervy about the GIANT NEEDLE used for EC. I don't see how ET can be that different to IUI, as they are just putting an embryo where they would have put the jizz, aren't they? I've had two of those and hardly felt a thing. They really were just like a smear test for me, just a bit longer. What made yours the worst bit?

KFZK is pretty good, but des suffer a bit with mess blindness. I tend to just get him to do things with me, rather than tell him to do things himself cos I think I would feel like his mum either clearing up after him on my own or standing there, hand on hip, while he does whatever it is. So I'll say "the fridge is looking a bit grim, let's clear it our on Sunday" or whatever, and he'll just go along with it. And things take half the time that way.

I never had IUI. ET hurt. It was very invasive. But everyone's different. After hearing about your down regging I was really worries but in reality I sailed through it. Won't you be sedated for EC?

Not sure Rie but if I have it again I definitely will.

What's EC? Egg C.... what?

Collection?

Yep, EC=egg collection, ET=embryo transfer. Or extra terrestrial, if you prefer to describe alien things being shoved up one's fanjo.

Yes, I will be sedated for EC. It's just the thought of someone putting a needle through the side of my fanjo that I find rather offputting.

DId you have Mr Jeff in there with you for either EC or ET? I noticed on that docu about IVF the partners tended to be in there. KFZK has generally stayed away until now, but came in today as I wanted to sort of get him used to seeing me fiddled with in case they suggested he come in for either procedure.

They put a needle through the side of your fanjo? How on earth did I miss that bit? Does sedation help?

Oh fuck. That sounds like the far side of Grim :(. Oh I don't think I could do that :(