Five and the Mystery of the Declining Fertility - the BESH engage the services of the Famous Five to track down their baybees and finish with lashings of ginger beer. Topping!

[ArielThePiraticalMermaid]

Morning everyone, just let me wolf down this amazing meal of tinned tongue, hardboiled eggs and ginger beer (don't you find food always tastes so much better outside?) and we'll toddle off on our latest adventure. We'll make sure Anne does the washing up (you'll make a proper little housewife and no doubt the fecund mother of four fine sons one day Anne ) and us boys can have the proper adventures! No, not you George - you're nearly as good as a boy but not quite. Leave the actual procreating to me and Dick. Woof woof! Shut up Timmy!

Oh Euro that sounds unpleasant. But chin up and don't cry, you're not a girl after all
I have a "thing" on my right upper eyelid, next to my nose. It's like a skin tag or summat. No idea what it is but as far as I can remember its always been there. Every time I see a new optician they have to comment on it. It doesn't cause me any bother though.

Ooo, drinks on you then Rie?

Where did you win it? Gambling, hustling pool?

In a quiz. I had to WORK for it. It was the jackpot question.

Shame, I quite like the idea of the BESH hustling pool in smokey bars like they do in the movies

Ooh. Am in awe of ries win. Pub quiz? I love a good pub quiz (with a pint and pork scratchings, obviously). Anyone else listen to Chris Evans this morning? Quiz-team Agulera. Snarfle.

euro, I have a quite frankly massive scar over my right eyebrow from 3 separate head injuries. I see it it every photo, and think it makes my eye brows wonky (the right is flatter/drooped). I'm really irritated you can see it in all my wedding photos. But obviously, everyone else is oblivious.

Or tell them it was from a shark attack. Either or.

I love pub quizzes, well done rie!

euro I have a fairly large scar on my left cheek from being burned as a child, it's not that bad to have some facial scarring, and yours will be much smaller than mine. Chin up old bean.

HWHNN does a lot of quizzes in the RAF. Quiz-team Aguilera is one of the more "family friendly" names I can repeat!

He also favours KenDoddsDad'sDog'sDead

Ooh. Besh pub quiz team! Either in real life or a fred feem. We're all intelligent, life experienced ladies and evil enough to cheat when needed

Bagsy first go on the puggy.

A quiz! A quiz! Ooh goody..

Why hasn't the hospital called yet about my MRI results and million blood tests? WHY?!

Hurrah for Rie's winning ways. Ginger beers all round? I love a good pub quiz.

Thanks for all your scar solidarity ladies. I don't think it will be going any time soon. I saw the surgeon for the initial consultation this morning and he was awful. Complete god complex. The cyst is v close to my hairline, so I asked if he would be able to remove the cyst from the top, so the scar is practically on the hairline. He said if he did that there is a 20-30% chance of it coming back, whereas if he cuts straight across the middle of it, it shouldn't. I said I was fine with the 20-30% chance. He then said in his clinic judgement that wasn't the best way to it and I might find someone who would take my money but he wouldn't. I asked him whether the fact that it was on my face didn't give me the bigger say. Apparently not. And this arrogance from a man whose main line of work is making boobs bigger... He was very rude and said I had the choice between a scar "and a big lump on my head". How very sensitive. Anyway, I left swiftly after that, and told his nurse who showed me out that I thought he was a prick. I think he probably heard. Good. So all in all, that wasn't terribly successful. I will be looking for another surgeon. I went to have my haircut after that and have had it cut so it should fall across it -plan B.

What a cunt

I really hope heard you. What a tosser. We shall set Timmy on him right away.

I love the bluntness of the BESH.

Go Timmy, go!

Euro he sounds like a twat.

Love the quiz team name Frank. I'd be shit in a quiz team, I don't know anything.

I have a chicken pox scar between my eyebrows, euro. I don't think anyone but me notices it.

Have had a dreadful day, filled with hysterical people all trying to create a crisis. And there wasn't any fucking haggis in Paddington, so now the planned lovely Burns Night reunion with AMMH is ruined (not that I care about haggis, but he really likes to make a thing of Burns Night and I have cocked it up. And my bloody family will all want to hover and converse and I would just like ten bastard minutes alone with my boyfriend to recover from my day and get used to each other after two weeks of being apart. ARGH.

On the other hand, I do like quizzes

Sorry euro, I also meant to say that the consultant is clearly a bellend of the highest order. Stupid cock.

at bellend. Love that word.

Me too.

A MNr was once memorably told on a thread "your a belend". Caused much mirth it did.

I've just eaten a Chinese takeaway. Mmmmmmmm.

I have accidentally semi ended up being out on a Friday night, how novel. I will soon be drinking a strawberry milkshake.

Note to self - don't drink before your nightly stabbing. It will cause bleeding. Ouchy

Ouch :(

Twinkly - you made strawberry milkshake sound like a euphemism for something sinister/exciting there. What could it mean? Also, my autocorrect is desperate to call you twinkletoes. Thought you'd like to know.

I want sponge cake and fresh raspberries. Where's Cook?

Frank - also ouch.