Fantastic Forty Plus, part 9, this time is our time,bring on the bfp's!

[hopefulgum]

We've filled out thread - I do hope you all find your way here. I can't add a message on the old thread to let you know it is here...

This new thread, will no doubt have its own set of bfp's and babies. I am excited to see what it brings.

It snowed here during the night but didn't stick, thank goodness.

sparkly, what diege said. When I called the dr having started spotting, her first question was whether we'd DTD the night before as apparently that can often cause spotting during pregnancy. Hope it's stopped? Am really glad to hear you've got a dr's appointment sorted.

notsoold thanks for giving me another reason to stay away from the hoover. Hope your bruises go down soon.

glizard what news from your visit to the doctor?

gum hope DS's second day has gone better!

drwho sorry things are so hard at the mo. I really hope you get your BFP soon.

As for me, yesterday and this morning I managed to convince myself that I was pg on the basis of my 'symptoms', but I feel completely normal now so am feeling a little foolish. I was on call yesterday and fortunately didn't get called; I spent the day crashed out on the sofa feeling very unwell in a vague, non-specific kind of way (I had one day like that before my BFP last time). Am fine again today although v tired as I couldn't sleep again because of lower back and hip pain (have only ever suffered from back pain when pregnant & then once again a few months ago) (going to see the osteopath tomorrow). On top of that, yesterday I made myself a ham and cheese toastie for lunch but couldn't eat it as the smell of the ham disgusted me - then this morning I sat down on the train and was immediately overcome by revulsion at a smell...the lady opposite me turned out to be eating a ham sandwich. When I got to work this morning, I could smell cleaning products a mile off (that happened last time).

But now I'm back to normal again! And I'm only CD27 in a cycle of about 35 days, and don't know when I ovulated so not much point testing yet?

Hi to all....notsoold hope your ok and the bruises are just bruises, nothing any worse. Sounds horrible.

sparkly I'm glad you have your appointment booked now. How many weeks along are you? I have a feeling we were a similar time...I would have bben coming up to 12 weeks now. I hope the bleeding behaves and turns out to be what diege and morien suggest. Plus if you are at a similar stage to what I would have been then your symptoms ie, sore boobies etc may well start to diminish about now.
morien I feel every ounce of your 2ww anxiousness . I hope your symptoms turn out to be for real.
jbrd..is DH away for long? It sounds like the break in routine has been just enough to throw you off kilter. I am a spur-of-the-moment, nor routine type of person.. except for mornings, when I like everything to run in its smooth and original order. Otherwise it throws out my whole day, so I can totally understand your annoyance on that one.

So I'm playing along at the "everything is totally normal" game just now. When really in my head everything still feels very far from normal. I found myself tearful at work today when Ed Sheerans Small Bump played on the radio. I felt frozen for a few minutes...unable to breath or move, whilst deeply absorbed in the lyrics. I have been hearing the song for months but today was the first time I listened to it. It sums up everything I feel.

Oh Cali honey...have a warm and fuzzy virtual hug from me. By the way, given how shit you're feeling, you are being remarkably mature and restrained on that other thread that I will not be going back to. I simply can't bear the negativity and rudeness from certain people on there. It's just horrible. No call for it at all. She's like a dog with a bone, but even my dog lets go if I say "leave"

Oh and despite evil cramps all day, no af as yet. Still lots of clear watery cm (sorry for the tmi) but I'm sure the hag is going to turn up in the morning cos of the cramps, and the fact that I feel spectacularly un pregnant...

Drwhofan..thankyou my lovely. Greatfully accepted x

all, it is so good to read this thread. bear with me while i try to catch up with what is happening for everyone.

Calibee - congrats on the proposal from your dp.. how exciting!

hopeful - thank you for your encouragement. so sorry to hear about your mc. as you say im sure it can have been nothing to do with bf and brilliant that you were still bf at 17 months

miasmummy - delighted to hear about finn. i hope he brings you much joy, though of course he will never replace mia.

in case it helps with your question on c-sections/ttc, i had my daughter at 38 by planned c-section due to previous medical history. i quizzed the consultant who performed it at uclh on how many c-sections you can have and with what spacing, as i had heard you had to space. wildly over-optimistically (and not that i have managed to convince my dp of this) i thought i would love to try for 2 more dcs. anyway his advice was that you can have 3 or 4 c-sections and that it wasnt true the body couldnt sustain it/you needed to space them. his advice to me was that i didnt need to wait before ttc again.

so i would definitely get a second opinion before abiding by your doctor's advice. there are certainly other highly informed medical opinions out there. weighed agains the fact that you want to recover from the c-section is the fact that you probably want to get on with ttc given that we are all on the fab 40 thread, perhaps he didnt weigh this factor sufficiently in the cost-benefit thing.

one other idea is that some people advise that it is good to space (c-section or not) so that the mother can recover her nutritional status and go on to nourish a further pregnancy as well as possible. an organisation that i have found brilliant in this regard is Foresight/Preconception. Through them you can do hair analysis which gives a very accurate reading of nutritional status and enables you to supplement to recover more quickly, improving chances of conceiving and carrying a healthy pregnancy. so one option might be to do that to aid recovery and start ttc soon.

I hope that is some help.

Morning All

Sparkly, your bleeding sounds like what Deige said, I have had exactly the same thing happen in all my pregnancies after DTD. I hope you can see the doctor asap to put your mind at ease.

Greenlizard, sorry about the BFN, it was sounding so positive for you. Perhaps you have a late implanter.What day did you say you had spotting? If that was implantation bleeding, you would usually get a + test two days later.

Calibee and DrWhofan, I saw that thread you mentioned and put in my 2 cents worth. I couldn't say nothing. Some people are so belligerent aren't they? There are Judgy McJudge pants everywhere.

Calibee, sorry to hear that things are hard, but it is to be expected. Miscarriage is just so difficult. I couldn't believe the grief I felt, but it is perfectly normal to hurt when your future is ripped away from you. Be kind to yourself. Is DP back this weekend? Here is a big cuddle for you

My day yesterday turned out to be just fine, though by the end of it I was thoroughly exhausted. DS was really good and didn't cry when I left him, and is already asking if he can take the school bus! Unbelievable. The Health Ed class was fine.I found myself chatting away about all things conception,contraception and pregnancy. The kids were very curious and behaved quite maturely. One young lady wanted to know if you could still get pregnant using a condom if her boyfriend came so much that it overflowed out of the condom I kept my cool and told her the best thing to do would be to get the morning after pill.I am sure, despite their youth, some of these kids are having sex. It's mind-boggling, but that's the reality of it...

I had a tiny bit of spotting yesterday, but AF still not here properly, I'm guessing she'll rear her ugly head some time today. My temperature is below coverline, so I'm not expecting a surprise bfp. And I can just feel it coming on...Oh well, another month of craziness coming up. Not planning timed sex or anything, will just see what happens.

According to my psychic fertility reading, this is the month I will conceive my twins.LOL!

Hi Skylark, we crossed posts. Nice to hear from you

Drwhofan, sorry that you feel AF is imminent. It sucks doesn't it? All we want is a BFP, an easy,trouble-free pregnancy and a a gorgeous healthy baby to take home. Why is it such a big ask????

Morning Ladies

15DPO - BFN and no AF! However, she is surely imminent due to the fact that my temps dipped again (still above coverline at 36.58 but seem to be on a downward pattern) but more telling I woke up covered in sweat last night which had drenched the sheets! I usually get this a night before AF starts (think it is dramatic drop in progesterone). The volume of it was noticeable though, the sheets were soaking (doesn't bode well for my menopause!) So I am convinced despite the absent AF that i am out this month. The real kicker is that DP is taking his children ski-ing at half term which now means (all things being equal) right across the time when I will ovulate, so I am out for next month already - There only two upsides as far as I can see it 1) I get to play with my new fertility monitor and 2) I am fully intending to have an extremely large glass of red wine!

So my lovely GP had this to say: my tests results are all very good and normal, so there is nothing to be deduced from them. There is another test AMH which is used to check ovarian reserve but isn't available on NHS as can give unreliable results. She did say that she could refer us to a fertility clinic for a consultation and further investigations as apparently under the NICE guidelines we are entitled to establish if there is a cause of infertility (eg. scans etc.) but we are not entitled to be treated for any cause established. How nuts is that?! A loophole if every I heard of one. However, she did say that we might wait a long time for an appointment and if money was not an issue we should privately book a one off consultation to take advice on whether there are further appropriate investigations needed. She did say given our age we might want to think about going straight to IVF especially as we are likely to respond well given that I am already ovulating OK etc. So that is it really we are having a look at what clinics are around and about and see if we can get any recommendations.

morien your symptoms sound promising - you may now be holding the BFP batton for the thread for this month!

drwhofan sorry you are feeling so anxious - it sounds really tough. Are you getting any support for that?

Everyone have great days...got to run.

xx

Laughing at Judgy McJudge pants...I like that. hopeful being in a mixed race relationship with a man almost half my age opens me up to many people like that. I find them quite entertaining on the whole as they must have lived very small lives to not have seen that it takes allsorts to make the world turn.
It sounds like you truly believe af is on her way ..I didnt know you had a fertility reading. The week before I would have conceived last year, I was in Birmingham with my daughter. A gypsy lady gave me a sprig of heather and a crystal and told me that the miracle I was waiting for would happen and that 29th December and 10th February were significant. 28th Dec (so only a day out) was date of my first bleed....and 10th Feb, my birthday. I'm not one to take too much stock of those things but that was a little close to the bone.

Hi to skylark

Morning lizard...that all sounds interesting. I had the AMH, done by the fertility clinic and then I paid for a private one (which was done by post)...the results were really poor. I must admit if I were you I think I would go along with the fertility clinic referral or go private if you can. At least you can get the tests done and have more of an idea if there are any "mechnical" problems so to speak. I had the amh and some progesterone tests as well as an internal anatomy scan and an HSG scan to make sure the fallopian tubes were clear.

Morning ladies. I'm definitely out. My period arrived this morning as I knew it woukd. A day later than last month but hey ho.

I'm going to have to see a GP, but given that we couldn't afford to go private, all I can do is get a progesterone test done. I'm pretty sure I'm ovulating, so will send dp to see his gp about a semen analysis. I suspect my eggs are knackered and few and far between. I don't want to think it may not happen for me, but I think I have to face the fact that it might not.

Drwhofan, sorry about AF turning up - me too. I am not surprised,and I am actually glad as it means I can move on and stop hoping.

It is time to move on to a new month - perhaps it will be our turn?

Calibee - that's pretty amazing about what the gypsy lady said. Perhaps the 10th Feb is not only your birthday but perhaps another chance at conception?

I don't hold much hope out for the psychic reading I got as it was one I bought on the internet,and seriously, how on earth can they do a reading without actually meeting you? I am sure it is a scam, but it was inexpensive and I've read on other forums that she's been right. I imagine rather than her getting it right, it was merely coincidence!

I had a good day at work, but can't believe how knackered I've been feeling - it just shows how slack I was throughout the holidays - definitely my preffered way of life. If I could just with the lottery....

I suppose I should turn my CBFM on tomorrow morning. Just in case I want to ttc this month

Hi all of you lovely ladies!
12dpo and I couldn't resist and poas to a BFN..:(
I kind of knew as I just didn't feel it at all, no symptoms and we couldn't dtd as often as I would like too...
Another month , I am getting older and I can see dh ( being 54 this year) changing his mind kind of soon.
Sorry about the all mememe post...

Am finally emerging from mc haze. Stopped bleeding yesterday I think, which is a relief. Thanks to everyone for the supportive messages last week.

drwho sorry to hear af got you, that's rubbish

calibee I'm very excited to hear about wedding proposals!

isabeller am keeping everything crossed for ivf success!

Sorry for all those with bfns

Writing this on my iPhone in the loos at work so not got time to name check everyone but thought I would pop on to say hello.

Afternoon everyone,

Good to hear from you zeuxippe, glad the bleeding has stopped. How are you feeling in yourself?

Green, that seems mad that you can find out what may be causing any infertility, but you can't have treatment. It must at least be reasurring that your tests came back normal. Is going to see a fertility consultant privately an option?

Gum, you must be relieved DS was ok with being left. The health class sounds entertaining at the very least, glad it's not as bad as you expected. Sorry that AF got you though, maybe next month will be your month.

Drwho, sorry about AF for you too, I hope you get your BFP soon.

Hugs to calibee, you seem to be doing amazingly well, even though we know you're finding it hard.

Morien, interesting symptoms, maybe worth POAS just in case?

AFM, I've been to the doctor's this morning, I was astonished to get an appointment. She was very nice, I told her about the spotting, she examined me, and thinks my uterus is a bit small for my dates, so has got me a EPU appointment tomorrow. I also explained I was unconvinced about there actually being a baby in there, and wasn't sure if she was just being kind when she said it was a bit small and actually thinks there's nothing there too. DH offered to come with me to the EPU, even though he doesn't want to, but he's working and I seem to remember they don't allow partners in for the scan anyway, so I think I'm ok to go on my own and I'm expecting bad news.

Hi sparkly good that you got an appointment with the dr and they are referring you for a scan tomorrow. How many weeks are you? Is there any chance you could be less pregnant than you thought? Hope it all goes ok.

I came back to work on Monday and the first day back was fine but then yesterday I nearly burst into tears several times. Today I feel ok again. I guess things will be up and down for a bit. Trying to look forward but each time I do I feel bad for the little one that never was.

Sparkly..fx for tomorrow and I how that everything will go well...xxxx

Zeuspipe....it is very difficult to go through loss and the loss of a Little One is a hard thing indeed... ( offering unsmumnsnety hug)...you are coping the best you can in the circumstances given...xxxx

Hello everyone, I'm grabbing a half hour rest before DPs Mum gets back from her day centre. This thread feels like home and I so appreciate everyone's kind support. OTD is 15th so only 8 1/2 days to go.

So far I've had no sign of AF and no symptoms that fall outside side effects of medication/wind or having a cold. No lemsip allowed .

I'm having trouble concentrating but finally posted my OU assignment and today went to visit my cousin & her 6 week old baby!

BTW the wind thread had me in stitches, much needed after the McPants comments.

I heard the OP of that thread got very upset about the personal attacks, such a pity.

Love to everyone x Is

Ahhh so sorry for all the BFN's and grotty AF's turning up....keep hope my lovely ladies.
sparkly lots and lots of good thoughts for your scan tomorrow...I will be thinking of you.
hopeful I certainly hope you will be turning on that monitor tomorrow. I may even give mine a whirl if/when my af turns up in a few weeks.
isabeller yes that poster on the other thread was vile and sadly very narrow minded. I'm afraid I hate bullies with such a vengeance that I just had to keep my nose in there. So much for support threads eh?? What are you studying through OU??
Waves to all....be back laters

gum how are you doing...has af arrived properly yet??
I didnt know you could get readings online...

Hopefully DP home this weekend....its my birthday. I think after that it may be a few weeks until he gets back. It costs so much on the train even with forces railcard.

Thanks notsoold for your kind comments

Sparkly - wishing that all goes ok for you tomorrow.

Zeuxippe - so sorry to hear about your mc ;-(

Calibee - hope you are ok and that the gypsy lady is right!

All the best for your scan tomorrow, sparkly. Will be thinking of you.

zeuxippe, it does get easier, but it takes a while... calibee, has work improved since the first day back?

Isabeller glad things are going well so far. I love the way you say 'only' 8 1/2 days to go - I hope it whizzes by for you.

I gave in and POAS (I wasn't planning to but came to a stop in the supermarket right in front of the tests) - BFN. I think it's too soon anyway, but in any case I'm not so aware of my 'symptoms' any more so I think they might have been in my head. Maybe if I'm honest it's because the due date from my MC is in 2 weeks and I really want to be pregnant when it comes around...

Went to see my lovely osteopath today for my back. She doesn't just treat the physical side, she probes into the emotional side too, so inevitably we ended up talking TTC. She was asking about DP's commitment to us having a baby and his involvement in TTC, and I said that, having accepted that that's what we're doing, he's happy to leave it all to me and we don't talk about it very often. She was a bit and said that perhaps we should talk more, in case I feel like I'm trying to have a baby on my own. I was still thinking about what she said when I got back from the supermarket, and DP came to help unpack the shopping, inc. the pg test, which I'd probably have spirited away without him seeing - but the osteopath's words made me act differently, so I got it out of the bag and said, 'and I bought a pg test too'. He just nodded and carried on putting the shopping away so I persevered, 'so that I can do a pregnancy test'....and he said, 'well, I really hope that...' - here I assume he's going to say 'it's positive', obv, but what he actually says is - 'the plumber sorted out the heating this time so you'll be warm this evening while I'm out at tennis'!!! I was taken aback for a second at the gulf between what the osteopath thinks is desirable and what I've actually got - but only for a second, because then I looked at him still putting the shopping away, oblivious, and I thought, 'I wouldn't have you any other way - thank goodness you do just let me get own with it'.

Evening all

Firstly sparkly I have everything crossed for you for tomorrow. I am glad that your DH offered to go with you as well but wanted to wish you good luck.

Secondly, sodding AF got me too (hopeful & Drwhofan we are officially aligned cycle buddies now!) So a shiny new cycle for us all......(it really is rubbish isn't it this TTC lark - grrrrr)

Drwhofan I do think that seeing a Dr would be a good idea. I had a CD3 FSH (follicular stimulating hormone) test and a CD21 (or 7 day post ovulation). It will give you an idea of how the basics are for you and that can never be a bad thing.

hopeful I was really hopeful for this month, especially as I had a clear temp dip along with blood streaked CM on 9DPO and then my temperatures shot back up again....but hey, ho back to the drawing board. I had my palm read at the fair years ago and the gypsy lady told me that I would have 4 children but not with my ex (he was loitering outside). So even if I count my acquired 2 SC, that means in I am line for another two - twins it is then !

I will now be unwrapping and firing up my newly acquired CB Fertility Monitor, if I can wrestle it off DP (he does love a gadget!). Given I started AF this afternoon about 17:00 and I haven't yet started full flow (but way more than spotting) - do I set today as Day 1 or tomorrow?

DP and I are going to go for a private consultation at a fertility clinic to discuss next steps and do any tests that they think might be useful. I think I am ready to go straight to IVF, if that is needed but I know that my DP is not there yet. We have also talked about adopting if things don't work out for us...I really, really want to be a Mum and it makes me ache inside that it isn't happening (yet).

xx