TTC 10+ months thread 12

[buzzybee123]

A very friendly and supportive thread for those taking way longer than they had ever expected to make a baby.

Thanks ladies. I'm on CD9 now. Next step is another scan on Saturday. It's looking like Tuesday or Wednesday for EC now, but they should be able to tell me more on Saturday.

rabbit I was really hoping for two big follies, but it looks like just the one.

Heh@tree licking. I'm sure I have done stranger things in my ttc quest! I spent my honeymoon in the Borneo jungle. But we weren't trying then cos of the malaria pills. Perhaps that is where I went wrong...

doll I do love your family's low key approach to all this. you are the very opposite of a drama llama!

Hello ladies

lemons I hope that you are feeling better. The slumps are the pits. FWIW I think that TTC dregs up all manner of odd feelings and in my experience has tapped into emotions that I thought I had dealt with a long time ago. It has made me dwell on the past, wish away the present but at the same time fear the future. I think sarlat hit the nail on the head when she talked about grieving for an imagined family. Anyway I hope that the fog has lifted for you a bit.

viv sorry about the ishoos with SWI. We went through this to some extent...mainly me wailing about not wanting to have sex, again and again and again. We now only really bother when we absolutely have to. It was part of my giving up and finding a routine that we could live with for the next however many fertile years. Things have improved a bit but I still feel really guilty about not doing it enough but then remember all the times that we have had sex bang on the right times and not got pregnant.

mrsd I am so happy for you that the lap is done and dusted. I am sorry that you felt a bit icky afterwards. I wonder whether you feel worse after a lap when they actually find something and have to have a tinker. I hope that you are feeling better today.

rabbits My periods sound a lot like yours TBH. I worry about it too and stress about menopause I used to have a couple of very heavy days and then pretty much nothing. Now it is pretty much nothing full stop. Like you lining thickness has never been an issue on scans. It is weird.

Hope that you aren't working too hard.
at bark licking

doll I did laugh about how low key your family are.

gin I am addicted to the Bake Off too and like you it makes me want cake. I have yet to test the new oven. If I can't make cakes in it I will die.
Any sign of AF?

Euro Wow at how close you are to EC. It all seems to happen so quickly once you start. Ovaries are weird. I always thought that my right ovary was the stronger one based on the ovulation pain being more intense on that side. Turns out the left seems to work better. Maybe the ovulation pain is the right side having to try harder because it is shit

joy hope that you are okay. I am thinking about you alot.

nelly welcome back. It felt like you had been gone an age! So glad that your wedding was brill and that you had a lovely honeymoon. Sorry about AF waiting in the airport lounge.

Well I am in the mega doldrums. I had my baseline scan this week and have got the practice egg transfer run next week and drug teach. I just feel so not ready and miserable about it all. I keep thinking if only I had another 6 months to get my head around it all. I am never happy It didn't help that I received through the post this morning a leaflet/letter, addressed to me, for a baby show???????????????? What the hell....why the hell....who the hell???????? Totally pissed me off

euro but this could well be THE follie! That's a lovely thought. I'm living in a dream world that clomid will bring me twins, one boy and one girl (names picked), deal done, burn the opks/thermometer/books in the garden whilst they are blissfully sleeping (they are sleep through the night babies from week 3) and never think or talk of ttc again! It WILL happen!!! In reality I know it won't, given that I don't know anyone for whom clomid has worked when they ovulate but hey, it's a rosier head place than being turned down at the adoption panel.

joycep talking of twins - thinking of you.

Aw hello pout I miss you and think of you lots. You CAN do this! Hand hold. Bt generally ttc is just a bit poo after the first month of unprotected shagging isn't it? In all ways, it sucks and I hate it. There, random pathetic bleating. How's the crafting? I have loads of stuff to tel, you about mine at another point! Fabric has become like crack cocaine to me. And I'm learning to crochet. Badly.

doll I need to take a leaf out of your book. I am the original Drama Llama (nice one euro and a keeper).

Going for record number of posts in one day. Right next up visit. Sigh.

Yes, I've also been thinking of joy. She must be about a week past transfer now? I hope she's doing ok.

rabbit part of me would love twins, but having seen a twin pregnancy and then twin toddlers, I think I will pass if I can! They are so cute but bloody hell a lot of work.

pout the ball is rolling then! And you are outsourcing now, so no more swi stress for a while!

EC isn't far off but I'm a bit irritated that I'm not oving from the right as that would mean EC a day or two sooner (I always ov earlier from that one). Now we're going for this, I just want to get on with it!

Euro ? Sorry! Forget you were doing a natural cycle. Can I ask why you decided to do it without drugs? 13mm is v good. I guess it doesn?t matter what side as long as you have one that?s a good side ? no? You only need one to make a baby!!

Rabbit ? yes ? this is my first time doing any AC, first time on Clomid. I wouldn?t worry. I have heard some horrible stories about Clomid but I believe they are in the minority. I have had no side effects at all aside from a headache on day 1 of taking it. I too have quite light periods and it concerns me too. Docs don?t think anything about it but my Chinese doc tells me it?s not ideal. She managed to get them to around 4 days and healthy (no clots) through herbs but I had to stop (the herbs) for the IUI & Clomid. As for the pill, don?t think that taking it is what messed up your fertility? I never took the pill (aside from 2 weeks when I was 19 years old) and I have been trying to TTC for more than 3 years. I know so many girlfriends in RL that were on it for 10 years and came off and became pregnant straight away so it?s really nothing to do with that.

Doll ? I am the same. Haven?t told anyone in my family and only v few close friends about AC (I was also v vague ? saying I might only try sometime this year). Not sure why ? fear of failure I think. DH think I am crazy and tells everyone he meets.

I'm not sure what I think about twins either euro. My friend has twin boys, they're 18 months now and very hard work, she is permanently exhausted. The high risk pregnancy, premature birth stuff concerns me too. I think the risks can be glossed over a bit. I remember when my friend was pregnant, she said her consultant told her that every twin pregnancy is high risk because the human body is not really designed to carry two babies at one time. I also have some personal experience because a close female relative had non Id twins very prematurely and they very sadly didn't survive. But, would I rather have two babies than none? Absolutely! I just think I will worry far more about it. The decision over whether to have one or two embies transferred (if I get there far) is going to be very tough.

Hi pout, I've missed you. How's the new home? Are you about to start ivf? Sorry, I can't remember where you're up to?

rabbits Ohhh yes for burning the TTC OPKs/vits/thermometer while Roger and Rufus sleep through for twelve hours in the cot in between making home made jam and hosting a coffee morning.
How are you learning to crochet? [jealous face] I never could get that How to Crochet magazine despite looking everywhere!
Fabric is addictive. I am mad about it and if I buy some particularly nice stuff I can't actually bring myself to cut it up and use it! Have you heard of Fabricland? They are online. There is lots of totally shite & old fashioned fabric but some hidden gems too that are really cheap. It's also good for the bog standard staples like plain cottons and ginghams. I am working on MrP to take me to an actual shop rather than doing it online

sea When I did Clomid the only big side effects were the sweats (which was actually a bit of a novelty because I am always cold usually!) and weight gain. That has been a bit of a bitch because I still can't lose it.

euro How are you finding the injecting? I know that all you ladies who have done IVF have said it is okay but I am totally bricking it. I literally feel all peculiar when I think of the part where I will have to stab myself with the needle.
Hoorah for outsourcing. MrP reckons we can still SWI this month. Can we? I keep telling him that we can't 'cos it's not allowed

mrsd x-posted. How are you feeling today?
The new house is fab thanks glosses over the fact that the boiler is leaking water. Anyone familiar with the horror film Dark Water Still not sorted and not unpacked but we are going to a carboot at the weekend and I hope to find some furniture to upcycle so we can unpack the rest of our stuff.
IVF starts next cycle. I'm doing all the baseline scanning stuff at the moment and very last minute HIV and hepatitis blood tests and some other blood test beginning with an E. Think it's a genetic thing.

The twin thing is a hard one. I think that it's easy to get carried away thinking about the cute side of twins and very easy to forget the health implications and sheer hardwork of it. MrP is a twin so it is especially easy for us to think that it's no biggie and quite normal.

Wow, pout that's so close to you starting. I reckon you'll be fine with the injecting. You don't sound like a wuss like me, remember I was scared about doing the enema on Sunday? It was fine, I found the hole! The first thing they did when I got to the hospital was give me a huge big thing to stick up there for anti nausea and I did that with no fuss. Proud of myself for getting over the bum phobia.

mrsd at bum phobia. A pessary to counteract nausea? Ye Gods. I'd rather be sick! My IVF blurb sheet mentions pessaries. I have taken the decision not to read anymore of the info. The way I see it they will do what they think is best. I don't need to know and worry myself to death thinking about it.

Unfortunately I know that I will be a total crying wreck about the injections. I can take all the indiginities but stabbing myself several times a day with a needle is just too much. I feel faint about blood tests and can't watch. The thought of standing in my kitchen, filling up a syringe or loading that pen thing and then making the leap to sticking the needle in my flesh makes me want to have a little cry wee

Are you in pain today or has it subsided? Is MrD with you?

Sea I specifically sought out a clinic that would do a natural cycle because I tried conventional IVF (NHS cycle) last summer and it did not go well! I downregged and it worked really well - everything shut down nicely - but the drugs made me depressed and gave me anxiety. They turned me into a different person and it scared me and Mr Euro. Anyway, at the scan to make sure everything was shut down, they asked me to downreg for another week, to fit in with the clinic's timetable. I lost it in the waiting room and we decided to stop then. I then had a 6 month break from AC before trying again, naturally. Don't let my experience worry you though - the Pill also makes me depressed (although rather more gradually). I'm just not good with synthetic hormones. It's not a common reaction though. I had never heard of anyone else feeling similar, but a couple of weeks ago, one poster on the "egg buddies" thread mentioned that she had had a similar experience.

Yep, it doesn't matter which side it comes from as long as it is a good'un!

pout I'm not injecting yet this cycle. I'll have to do the trigger shot in a couple of days though. I have injected in the past though (trigger shot when on Letrozole and the downregging drugs) and it was fine. The first time you put the needle into yourself if weird, but only mentally. I didn't find it hurt most of the time (occasioannly it would sting a bit, but nothing too bad).

If you are doing LP and starting to downreg on day 21, I think some clinics say you shouldn't try that cycle. Mine didn't so we did still try. You are v close now!

mrsd that bodes well for future local medical care where you are!

As well as my friend who had twins having a mega bump during pregnancy, it was all a bit tricky medically. She bled a lot early on, and then her waters went at 31 weeks. She was taken to hospital in Brighton(!) (she lives in London) as it was the nearest place with two NICU beds available in the same place. They eventually sent her home after a while, on bedrest (which drove her crazy) until she eventually had them at 35 weeks. It was a very worrying time because of the risk of infection. There was also some minor twin to twin transfusion system (the babies are mixed race but one came out white and the other a reddy brown as he was hogging all the blood). I always fancied twins till I saw all of that up close! They are amazing now though, but such hard work.

pout most clinics give you progesterone pessaries to take after ET. I've tried those before too. Getting them in is fine, but they melt into a masty gunky mess.

pout can MrPout give you the injections? Most ladies here do it themselves so you can get loads of advice. Not me though. Spread the burden I say. Ken figured it out, preps the needle and meds and does the injection. I don't even watch, not because I'm that bothered, more because I believe in outsourcing

doll The nurse said that the drugs will prob have to be administered 12 hours apart like 7am and 7pm. MrP is out of the house for longer than 12 hours most days so that wouldn't work. I don't want to rely on him and then find that he isn't here IYSWIM. He also doesn't seem keen on doing the injecting. Can't think why

euro is it you who left a trail of pessary gunk on the carpet or was it art ?
It's not really the pain issue for me it is this strange, bordering on phobia, about the actual act of sticking myself with a needle. Oh dear.

MrP's mother had to have total bed rest for weeks with her twins.

pout that was art
Mmmm yes that wouldn't work would it. My Dr said around the time each day.We are doing it between 9 and 10 this time as there is so much going on until then.

I was only injecting once a day, but did it myself anyway. After the first couple of times, I made Mr Euro come and prep the injection, more to make him feel involved in the process and less like it was my treatment (rather than ours).

That wasn't me pout. I think you usually have those 12 hrs apart for IVF, but when I tried them in case my prog levels are a bit low I just did once a day. I used them last thing at night, so most of the gunk was washed away with my morning shower, thankfully. That reminds me, we must get in some sff this weekend before the gunkiness starts!

My prog fanny candles for IVF were three times a day euro I'm sure it will be the same this time. The middle of the day one is the most annoying. How is your work schedule in the next week?

Manic. The other senior person here is having a big op here, and I am having to babysit her caseload, just when I want to be taking it easy. Her op is far more important though (hysterectomy after years of dodgy smears) so even though my IVF was planned first, I can't complain (although I no doubt will).

3 times a day? Yeuch.

Oops, pressed post too soon. How is your work schedule?

euro sorry that sounds heavy but complain away. Mine is a nightmare too, last time it was pretty heavy but there was more anaytical, desk based independant stuff now more operational, involving more staff and more running around in and out of town. I'm noticing it, for example, in my diet. Last time I was able to choose what I was eating to a large extent, this week I have grapped whatever on the street everyday. Weridly, you remember my last IVF coincided with decisions regarding a move to Tehran? We turned it down in the end after weeks of wrestling with the idea. It has come up again, totally werid. Anyway, in summary way too much stuff going on...

Hello ladies, just sneaking on at work. I do keep up with what?s happening on my phone but it?s so hard to keep posting that way. Things move so quickly!

Mrsden ? well done on getting through your lap. Sounds traumatic but it?s great things are looking healthy in there now.

Euro ? hope your ovaries get with the programme soon! They do like to confuse us and have a mind of their own, I?m sure.

Rabbit ? What you wrote about your periods could have been describing mine exactly. I remember having to wear more than one pair of underpants (sometimes 3!) to bed at night as a teenager because my periods were so heavy and would sometimes leak. Post pill they are SO much lighter. I?ve never had my lining measured but sometimes I do worry it?s not enough.

Pout ? How do these people find us? I got a leaflet through my door last week for a local mother and baby group. Sorry you?re feeling a bit dodgy about IVF. I think those feelings must be completely normal and although I haven?t been through it all myself, I can imagine i?d be exactly the same. You can do it!

Waves to everyone else!

I?m on CD 29 and the usual spotting has started. I?ve had some stringy brown CM since O (bleurgh) and am expecting AF by the weekend so that is at least slightly less spotting that usual. I do feel it?s easing off ever so slightly as the months go on. This is also the first month I haven?t felt completed crushed when the spotting started, indicating that AF is well and truly just around the corner. Ho hum, onto cycle 15 and I'm off to lick a tree.

Doll I can't believe you are on round 2 already! I had the Fail bleed, and then this weekends post honeymoon surprise was the next one -5 and a half weeks on. They said i should expect my cycle to be 4-6 weeks, although of course i hoped it meant something else. I need to have a normal cycle before I can go again. Also I have no idea how we can pay for another one just now

Pout the jabs were a piece of cake and I really don't like needles. I found there was a certain way to hold the pen as the plunger is quite stiff, but otherwise it was fine. My only stress about going again is work, plus the issues I had with slow response. You will be totally fine!

I wish my clinic did natural, Euro.

nelly it's hard to know what to believe regarding returning cycles. I wasn't warned about cycle change (obviously). In my case I had the Fail bleed then a 25 day period with + OPK at CD 11, that's totally normal for me. Followed by a 18 day cycle without ov - never occurred before. Dr said they often see this after IVF. But then here he would do back-to-back IVF cycles if I wanted.

25 day cycle not 25 day period obviously.