Those waiting to ttc... (slightly pointless thread)

[LoveYouForeverMyBaby]

We're ttc #2 in dec and I know it's a really silly thing to get excited about, but just started taking folic acid and feeling very excited about it!

Sorry for the pointless thread.

MadameLeBean yep fertility does decline, but please don't get too freaked out or worried by the article.

Yes, physically, the sooner the better, but I think so much of this age/when to have children question depends on individuals' circumstances and how people's lives have panned out.

I would be absolutely over the moon to have small children around when I'm 40! But I can totally understand you having a different perspective given that you embarked on motherhood at 18. At 40 you'll have 22 years of parenthood under your belt.

When I had DD (at 30) the midwife commented on what a young mum I was and most of my NCT group were late 30s and early 40s. I felt rather immature in comparison and they were all without doubt in a better position financially and career-wise than me.

I hope I don't sound defensive, but I'm the 'wrong' side of 35 and don't consider myself out of the fertility game just yet.

Yes totally not meaning to sound negative about older mothers just that I don't want to - as you say - have 22 yrs of small kids!

Madame totally agree that these decisions are so difficult when money is a factor. I suspect Mr Hairy would have agreed to another DC much sooner if our finances had been healthier. It wasn't the only factor, but probably in the top three.

Ooh, I feel like a proper mumsnetter now I'm on a list.

I'm preparing for a bit of 'oh aren't you too young for this' with planning to be a mum early. I'm 22, which doesn't seem that early to me, but compared to a lot of people I know it really is. For me though it seems right, and for DP too, so I guess that's all that matters. I think some people are going to be judgey whenever it is you have kids.

The only reason we can afford to have children is DP being older (34) and having been childless for the first part of his working life he's been able to save up. And it's going to be a struggle even with his savings.

I am 37 and going to be trying for my first very soon - I do worry that it might be too late but first meeting the right person and then finances have meant that this is the first time that I have been able to try. Fingers crossed....

Little one is 1 so no twice a day action for us anymore, but still want to do it everyday to help our chances, dh is acting like I'm being unreasonable he should be grateful(!)

I'm also 31 and am starting to hear that clock ticking louder everyday...i should add that my natural state is usually one of worry, paranoia and neurosis and ttc that!

Should read ttc amplifies that!

November
mrs wajs ttc#2 now
flowers for tea sooner than she thought!
Stick the kettle on age 40 ttc#3 next week!
peeohayess ttc#2 not actively, but.......
Larty74 ttc #2
setayharas November
mythreeknights age 34ttc#3 November
loveyouforever age 31 ttc #2

December
riskit4abiskit ttc#1 December
Rugbywidow7 ttc#2 dec/ jan
cunningplan December
familyguyfan ttc#2 soon
sloeginfizz December
london supertrooper age 39 ttc#2 December
bridget&hb age 35 ttc#2 December
jaffacakehips ttc#2 dec/jan
lollyshmollypop #2 December
mumaaaah ttc#2 mid December
DejaB00 age 33 ttc #2 December
loulou the shamed age 29 ttc#2 dec/jan
swedeheeed December

After Xmas
whyriskit ttc#3 after Xmas
notyouagain #2 after Xmas
amiready ttc#1 after Xmas

January
Winterpansy ttc #2 jan/feb
bourbonsandtea ttc#2 january
gooseygirl age 37 ttc#2 January
tigerseyemum age 39 January
tothemoon ttc#1 January
mrs spencer Reid ttc #2 January
2beornot ttc #2 new year
Mika2 age 31 ttc #1 after getting promoted! (fx)
serious stuff ttc#1 January
sorelip ttc#2
london supertrooper age 39ttc#2
rainbowtea23 age 26 ttc#1
zedds age 37 ttc#1
tryingtoconcievesharply age 23 ttc #1
lavenderpots ttc#3

February
crazyhead ttc#2 in feb/march
fancy nancy 77 age 35 ttc#2 feb/mar
accidental exhibitionist ttc#2 February
volleyfeet ttc#1

March
batfish ttc#1 march

April
Zen nudist age 34 ttc #2 April/may?
caramal ttc#2 hopefully April.
orbis non sufficit age 35 ttc#1 April
horseygirl1 ttc#2

May
leafmould age 34 ttc#3 May
definately sometime age 30 ttc#1 May.
jazzcat28 ttc#1 may/June
toomuchlaptop age 36 ttc#2

July
painted cat age 22 ttc #1

August
part1 ttc#2 August

September
Porridge with almond milk

Autumn
twojackrussellsandababy ttc#2

September 2014
madamelebean ttc #2

Indefinite or vague
mintberry

Once again, just say if I've got you wrong!

I have just put in a correction and a few ages, after reading that article, it feels like more than ever an important factor. . . Less like a 'choice' to have children later, and more like a battle to have them earlier!

Lots of interesting thoughts on here, both DH and I are graduates and although we have jobs they aren't exactly what we had imagined we would have gone onto after finishing uni back in 2008 but job markets and economic situations have changed. Very few of our uni friends have children yet as they try and establish careers, I've always wanted to have a child before reaching 30 and maybe a few more if we are lucky enough and be able to enjoy them without thinking about a career I've left and would find it hard to get back into if that makes sense. To me, I understand this isn't the case for everyone, the career can wait, I still have a degree at the end of the day and I have a job in a company that could lead to greater progression in the future when the time is right for me.

DH and I have decided not to TTC for another year at least, as we are struggling enough with DS. Tonight as he cries and keeps us up late yet again, I'm seriously considering sterilisation.

To those TTCing very soon, good luck, and to those waiting to TTC, I hope the wait isn't too bad.

Sorelip I empathise... My dd who is 7 and normally total angel decided to do devil child style tantrum - complete with snarling - the other night, because she wasn't allowed more cheese on her pasta (as she had been whinging about it)

Then I thought god why would I want a smaller less reasonable one?!!!

But DP and I talked a little about it last night and think he seemed keener - but we are on a mission to get our finances and house sorted first.

Sorelip sorry to hear that now isn't the right time to ttc. It's good that you and your DH can talk these things through. We have had some very challenging times with Mini Bridget so can understand the feeling that one is plenty (even more than enough) right now.

Good luck with your studies, stay strong and take good care of yourself - when the time is right, you are going to be great place to have another.

sorelip good luck with everything sounds like you're being very sensible in waiting one more year.

Have been using opk much to dh annoyance but still no lh surge detected, want that smiley face!

Sorelip, sounds like you LO is being a bit challenging! Am sure you will know when it's the right time, DH and I too wonder whether its a good idea to think about starting again with a newborn when things are going back to relative normal now the Boy is one but I think I'd be sad if we didn't try for a sibling

Am sitting in my car listening to the rain and knitting an Xmas stocking whilst waiting to go to my next appointment, not a bad job I have sometimes....

toomuch opk are ovulation predictor kit, and I get slightlym infused with cycles but think day 1 is the first day of your period, and if you count until the next day before your next on, that's how long your cycle s.

Can someone else confirm that please?

Sorry should read confused not infused.

LoveYouForever any chance you've had your LH surge already? Sorry to be personal but how is your cm? Does that give you any indication of how close to ovulation you are?

I keep hovering next to the Clear Blue OPKs in Boots but ultimately deciding not to buy them (they have been in and out of my basket a few times though ). I keep thinking that they are awfully expensive just to pee on but I expect I'll succumb in the next few months.

I have some cheapies I picked up in Morrisons that I've messed about with this cycle - not sure if I got a positive or not but I had fun peeing into an empty petit filous pot! DP saw the pot in the bathroom and asked what on earth it was doing upstairs. I just shrugged like I had no idea and sort of nodded in Mini Bridget's direction

TwoJacks very jealous of your knitting skills Will have to get around to quizzing you about managing a dog and a baby one of these day..

LoveYouForever that matches my understanding of it. I can get quite a lot of on and off heavy spotting (over a number of days) before my period starts properly so sometimes I waiver over which day to count as day 1. But I think as long as you are consistent in your own personal criteria then it doesn't matter too much.

I think I read once that if you start bleeding in the afternoon then cycle day 1 is the next day, but I've never used that rule.

TooMuchLaptop as a very general rule women with a 28 day-ish cycle are most fertile mid-cycle (somewhere around cycle day 14). However, things get more complicated if you have a longer or shorter cycle than this. It is the period of time post-ovulation (the lutueal phase) that stays roughly the same rather than the length of time before ovulation. So, someone with a 30 day cycle could expect to ovulate around day 16 and someone with a 26 day cycle on day 12.

I have normally have 27-29 day cycles. I always very, very roughly think of my cycle as..week 1 my period, week 2 my fertile week, weeks 3 & 4 my two week wait (tww).

That was all probably as clear as mud! Think there is a guide on mumsnet somewhere

Aaaaand now I think I've changed my mind. I feel so damn broody, but when DS keeps us awake all night (literally all night - DH couldn't go to work because he got no sleep) I'd tempted to try home sterilisation. He's not very well though, been off his food and very upset, so I think he's teething badly. I have to try to remember that this isn't how he is all the time.

Hi all, can I join in this exciting thread plz? This is my first time adding a msg, it's exciting! Well I'm 26 & my dh is 28 and we plan to start trying in January. We have been married for 2.5 yrs but hav been going on lovely holidays & fixing up our house but now I think it's time to take the plunge and hav a baby! :) I'vs always wanted to b a mummy just wanted to get all my ducks in a row first, and now that I hav I am super excited for baby making! Roll on the new year!!

bridget I've only used the opk for two days (today and yesterday) so maybe I haven't ovulated yet? Although the ov calculators say I am/was fertile yesterday through to sunday, so starting to get a bit worried/unneccessarily neurotic(!)

I only bought the 7 day one with a pg test included, so I guess next month I'll get the 20day one so I don't miss it.

Cm doesn't seem to have changed much, maybe ever so slight more of it, but nothing that is noteworthy.

I'll be testing around the 9th dec, will you be testing then too? Don't want to get my hopes up but really want a bfp!

sunshine welcome to our thread! It's all very exciting isn't it

sorelip why ont you try the NTNP method? That way if it happens it happens and you don't have to make a decision as such.

AF is making her presence felt today, damn her. I am feeling sorry for myself and snuggling under my blankie having a cuppa after uni instead of plodding on with more work.

As a geriatric 39 with severe endo I hope I have not left it too late :( I never picture me as a mother, never have been able to, but you never know. I am toddler sitting this weekend so maybe that will put me off!