ttc and OH has low/no sex drive - any recommendations???

[onemoreforgoodmeasure]

Pretty much as it says in the title. My OH gets increasingly worried each month, which I can tell by the increasing number of excuses he comes up with to get out of it. I'm lucky if we get two goes around ovulation time, but often it's one or none. I try so hard not to add any pressure, but as the months pass I'm also getting frustrated with him. We actually never have sex anymore so I can't just not let him know when sex week is and pretend it's causal. I was wondering about whether we should go to a clinic or something... does anyone have any suggestions?

I was talking to my DH about this and he says pressure really puts him off, pressure for him is swi every other day or swi all through the month, so it works for us to use opks and target that zone. BUt that doesnt work for everyone.
Some ladies on here, dont tell there OH, they just seduce them around ov, wether that be with sexy underwear or just jumping on .

My DH has said that the vitimins he is on help to improve his sex drive, he takes wellman conception vits.

How many months have you been trying?

This is actually a common problem! However twice around ovulation time is enough. Do all you can to ensure you're certain of the timing of your ovulation then i'd just seduce him. Do something you know will get him going, it means you have to be proactive and do most of the work but if its just 2-3 times hopefully not too arduous. Many women swear by oral to start him off but whatever works best for you both.

though it would also be good for him to clear out his old sperm prior to entering the fertile period, apparently old sperm isn't so good.

Thanks guys. I can't seduce him because it's got to the point where we don't actually have sex anymore, so I have to tell him when it's got to happen, which is unfortunant added pressure. I'll have a look at the wellman vitamins, OH has also greed to try some herbal supplements, neither of us really take vits of believe in herbal rememdies but want to try everything, and going to the GP will freak him out more.

We've been trying since December, got pg after a month where we only dtd once but the timing was perfect. It ended in MC and we've only just been able to start back to ttc this month. Before getting pg I was quite casual about letting it happen and so I didn't risk putting pressure on him. This month though was really difficult so I know we're going to need to look at all our options.

And I told him about the clearing out the old sperm bit, I'm not totally confident he still does anything to be honest, but he says he does.

Anyway, thanks, I just wondered what other peple do, I am begining to see it's more common than I realised and that's a comfort.

Hi onemore, it seems a real shame that you are not having sex at all anymore regardless of whether you want a baby, there are things that can affect sex drive, perhaps it's worth a trip to the dr to discuss that?

If you are both happy enough not having sex it might be worth getting opks, working out when you ov so you can target when you do have to do it. Maybe turkey basting might work if he would prefer to sort himself out?

If it was me though - and I did actually do this once when DH lost his sex drive - head to the drs and talk about what could be done to increase his sex drive first. DH was just stressed with work and TTC amongst other things so it sorted itself out after a while but at the time we found out that some men have a huge dip in testosterone which makes their sex drive disappear but can be sorted out and increase his sex drive again.

Hope which ever way you go works out x