Who is joining me on the hideous 2ww?

[LauraM20]

Hey All!
Im currently on CD 20 so around 8-10 days until the AF arrives or I can test :D Just thought there may be some others that are waiting and driving themselves crazy! Thought we could hopefully share our BFP within the next few weeks, and keep each other sane! :D

Hi all, just checking in as i am now in the dreaded 2ww.

Had a termination for medical reasons in dec so this is my first (and last) month trying. Dh working away till next summer so if it does not happen now it's really not likely to in the odd snatched weekends.

I got a strong + on opk last tues and wed so not sure what date I would have ovulated?

Am hoping to hold out until thurs 9th to test but I am slightly obsessed by poas and have a bundle of eBay cheapies so I doubt I will last that long

Thanks snowbeetle for your kind words.

One thing my mc taught me is that you never truly know what other people have gone through to get their children, for some people it seems so easy from the outside but they may have hidden an awful lot of difficulties from their friends and family.

I see we're due AF on the same date (although this is only the second cycle after my ERPC so I could still be off my normal 28 days). Can you hold off testing or will you do it next weekend?

Hi ifrsutrated - sorry to hear of your termination and hope you get lucky. If it is any consolation my friend had T for medical reasons and got pregnant again very quickly - tho not sure how quickly. So I hope you get some similar luck. :)

Good question MissLAL, think I will wait till 2 days late, and the only way I can achieve this is by not having any blimmin sticks in the house to pee on and then somehow not managing to find the time to go to the shop!
This is cos 2 cycles ago I was 2 days late and felt pregnant, tingly boobs etc. Was so smug I managed to wait to poas (tho up at 5 am on the day cos so excited) for 2 days. had did pee feeling it was very much a formality and wondering what to do with all the stilton in the fridge but it was negative. Coulda blown me down wiv a fevver. Then the second I threw it in the bin I came on big time!
So after that I am going to wait as long as I possibly can so I don't get my hopes up too high. If it wasn't for that I would probably be lucky to wait as long as next weekend. Come ooonnnnn babba - I want you!!!!

Sorry for excessivley long answer!

p.s yes - this whole experience of having babies and being there for and with others has definitely been an eye opener - I rarelt ever catch myself feeling jealous of others now cos they look like they have it all when you never know what is going on behind closed doors. compassion for everyone I say. :)

rarelt - rarely

That's why I'm not sure about testing on tues because it might still be too early and don't want to waste the test.

I don't know if my willpower will let me wait any longer though!

I don't think anyone really knows, but it doesn't make it any easier unfortunately :(

Two women at work - one of which I am really close to and it took a year, the other conceived without ever seeing a period after she came off the pill.

Woman I'm close to - I spent so many lunches with her comforting her, telling her it would be OK, telling her she wasn't crazy with her VERY unreasonable reactions to another trying IVF as a single woman (she was in her late 30'S - i completely understand her thinking in that situation!), telling her it would happen etc.

She also knew - the whole time she talked on and on and on and on and on about her pregnancy - that I was TTCing in the last couple of months before her maternity leave. I really felt like - she should have remembered what it feels like :(

The other woman - who never saw a period - can't understand why in the end, it was a relief when the first woman left. But she hadn't gone through the struggle, the disappointment, the worry, the fear. So until - if - that happens, how can she?

I really feel like I will struggle to ever really forgive the first woman, and I'm one that really lives and lets live. I honestly feel she should have remembered EXACTLY how it feels and to give me grief because I had to walk away from numerous conversations about how amazing it is to be pregnant...well, as much as I know how wrapped up you can become, I also know I would have those same conversations away from her if it was pregnant. I would have recognised it was a sensitive subject, one she was not able to be around.

Oh Bettybat - what a tale of thoughtlessness! Poor you.

I had a friend I know wanted children so I reined in the effusive raving of being pregnant a mum etc. I was so glad I did, as I later discovered she had been ttc the whole time! She is now expecting - hoorayyyyyy.

Some people really do forget about others feelings when so wrapped up in their own sadly. I'm sure we've all been guilty at some point - but like you say - she should have known better. :(

I think that's the thing....the thoughtlessness. When she was here, I sat between these two women in a line of desks. So often, they would talk pregnancy things around me. Only recently have I mentioned to the other woman I'm TTCing. her reaction immediately - oh my god, I'm so sorry, me and X had all those conversations...it must have been so hard for you.

But the thing is, she didn't know so how could I be annoyed with her? But the woman I'm close to a) did know I'm TTCing and b) went through all the same irrationalities I am feeling now because it took her a while too.

So yeah, I do feel justified in being glad she's gone because to be honest, even though it was probably just innocent thoughtlessness, I still don't need that kind of "friend".

You sound very kind, and very sweet to your friends Snowbeetle - it's not about not wanting to hear and share your friends joy. It's also just wanting someone to remember and understand the lack of joy too.

So true about having someone to remember - we have had a conversation about it recently actually where she said she didn't want me to hide my happiness and I said I didn't want to trample all over her and we both agreed we would share the pain and the pleasure together. I think sometimes it is (unconsciously) not wanting to take on someone elses pain - but that is what friends do. Funnily enough she is now the preggers one and I'm ttc - so what goes around... :)

Thank goodness one of your ladies has some empathy for you - or you could end up feeling all invisible - I think you are right - you don't need friends like that who take and don't give - life is too short!

p.s glad you're not stuck between those conversations anymore - talk about ramping up the agony of not conceiving.

I have been been fairly open with people, including cho workers about ttc. Another girl at the office has a 1 yr old and we have been chatting and it took her a year to concieve. She is still bf right now so no period yet and have been chatting about if she is going to try again.. At this point she doesn't know as it was so hard on her last time. another girl got married would the same time and is also trying. Nice to have x someone to swap stories with.

Who have you told you are ttc?

I have hinted to my mother and mother in law, but not outright told them.

snowbeetle thankies :)

Beeblebear not sure if you're asking me or the group or someone else specifically but I shall answer anyway :0

I personally had not told anyone except this woman and my mum until...last week, maybe. I think - getting the impression - DH has told a lot more people than I have. Like you, I've started saying things like, oh when such and such is finalised/sorted we'll start trying.

This woman and I were very close, we shared a lot - all of our (very similar) fears regarding conceiving. Except when she completely freaked out over a much older, single woman considering IVF/single parentdom. She raged to me that this woman had no right to have a baby in those circumstances...then collapsed in floods of tears, saying she knew she was being irrational.

I guess this person really hurt me because she knew my concerns, knew I'd had an MC months ago (which was a huge shock as I was on the pill and subsequently what got our arses in gear for TTC). I guess it was the thoughtlessness of it all. I sometimes wondered how she would have felt if I'd have come into work with pregnancy news before her and because of how I'd seen her get upset, would have kept talk within her vicinity to a minimum.

I really should just get over it! :)

As its out second dc we've told everyone except dh's side. Most people are pretty blasé about it because it's not our first!

I'm sure hope everyone will still be v excited. Dh's sis has just got preg with her second so will be v close in dates with her.

Been reading about period type pains and it seems fairly common in early preg so I'm def not ruling it out unless AF shows. I will be testing tues morn!

Hi all! And welcome to the newbies :)

I have told a couple of close friends that we are ttc, one of whom had her ds at the same time as my dc and is pregnant again herself. Another of my friends from nct (which invariably means all the other nct mums probably know too - not that I mind) and an old uni friend who I know is ttc too. The last of these is a slightly awkward one as she had an ectopic pregnancy last year and I really dread having to tell her that I'm expecting my dc2 when she's still ttc dc1...hmmmm...

cakes and dh21 - sorry to hear you're both having af twinges... I really hope they turn out to be figments of your imagination. Still nothing here for me, trying to keep really busy so there's no time for symptom spotting. I was feeling quite sick this afternoon but I think it's because I ate too many nachos
I think I will test on Tuesday but like I said though, my cycles are all over the place still and I've only had 2 proper ones since I cut down on breastfeeding dd.
I think the three of us are next in line are we not? Baby-dust to all! :)

Elle x

Stats List - Please cut, paste and update!!!PLACE IN AF DUE DATE ORDER!

BIGFATPOSITIVE- YEHHHHH BABY!

Winnie31- 21/1/12
Milk -BFP -26/1/12
browneyesblue BFP 13/1/12

--
ONLY A MATTER OF TIME FOR US -

Desperatehousewife- TTC no. 2, second month. AF due 31st (ish) Jan.
Cakesareyummy -TTC no 2, Cycle 2, AF due 31/1.
Ellesabe-TTC#2,1st cycle, AF due 31/1(could be later as my cycles are weird!)
KPT083 TTC #1 for 1 year, MMC Aug, AF due (god knows when) but if a short cycle 30jan-2nd feb
twolittlemonkeys - ttc #3 for 2 years, AF due (if Clomid works) 1/3 Feb (ish)
Misslaughalot -TTC #1, mc Nov2011, AF due 5th Feb if cycle is back to normal
Snowbeetle - TTC no.2. 7th cycle. AF due 5th Feb
Beeblebear ttc#1. 2nd month. Cd 14 af due Feb 10-15
LauraM20-AF 16th Jan TTC 10 months AF due 14th AF Due 12th-14th Feb
Bettybat-AF was Jan 16-19Last cycle27- 33 days.AF due.11th- 16th Feb.
CMyB-35-AF 17th Jan.(trying since aug)AF 16-17/2(hope it dont show!).
Confusedmumdotcom. TTC no2. Cycle 2. AF due 22/2
Alibobster-TTC baby no2 for 3 1/2 years, had- 4 m/c. On cd20 of 28/29 cycle

Welcome Ellesabe - added you to list!
this is just so we can support each other as the dreaded AF hag trys to stop our BFP!!!!
oh B.Bat - the thing is some people are clueless how to act and as i call it suffer from goldfish brain in which they so easily forget things spoken about or have happened. but you should look at you as a person and remember how you feel and hope that when it happens for you, you don't forget how hard it was for you to get there! keep being you regardless of others is my saying at work!!!
welcome IFrustrated -so sorry to hear about what you have gone through i hope your time spent here will be helpful and we all hold hands to offer support, please add if you want to the list!
welcome misslaughalot- welcome and I'm so sorry to hear about your loss and i do hope that you also get your BFP real soon, feel free too add yourself to the list also.
let hope the AF hag stays away and those cramps are going to bring a BFP!

Hmm now im thinking I could be preg, dh and I dtd earlier and it was quite painful when he went in deep (sorry if tmi!) and I never usually get that when expecting AF so fingers crossed.

Ooh dh21 yes that is far tmi bit sounds promising nonetheless!!! :) :) :)

I need distractions... otherwise I know I'm going to POAS far too early, which will result in a premature BFN and copious chocolate eating! I have a really quiet week ahead unfortunately.... what can I do at home to fill the next week?

TBH I am fully expecting AF, despite all the SWI - I have the telltale hideous breakouts all over my face and am craving chocolate so much (trying to avoid it because I'm doing Slimming World to support DH as he needs to lose a few stone). I kind of hope she arrives earlier in the week so I don't get my hopes up too much.

Come on girls, give me some ideas for 2ww distractions pleeeeeeeeeeeeaaase! (Preferably vaguely productive ideas or at least things to keep my brain working and stop me overanalysing) I can't spend the whole week MNing!

2lm - reorganize the linnen closet.
Bake an oven ready dish to bring to a friend, then go visit that friend
Go walk around the mall. (do not sit in a glider chair in the baby section of the department storeand update posts on mn, cause tnen you will be nuts like me)

Haha yes maybe avoid baby shops!
Meet up with friends, bake anything, clean the house from top to bottom. Not all in one day though!

Any news today? I can't keep away, it's so exciting to see who's going to get a BFP next! I've just ordered some Pre-seed to fuel my obsession

It's so hard not to test, I've only got to wait 24 hours. I'm scared to test though because I don't want to see the words not pregnant.
Praying so hard AF doesn't come.

Haha, OK, going back on what I said about the OV sticks....on Saturday it was slightly lighter than the control line - but a WHOLE LOT DARKER than previous tests. They were barely, barely visible for the last week.

24 hours later, the test lines have gone back to being barely visible again. Could I have ovulated? I really think it was too early - I was expecting maybe Wednesday. But maybe the combination of cycles varying between five days, and a month a day longer than last month have made it early?

God only knows. We've DTD every day since Thursday. Was the OV test on Saturday a positive? I wish there was a fertility godmother who could pop up when you need her to give you a definitive answer - I'm really not confident of my ability to decide what is or isn't positive or negative :(

I think now - looking back - the OV test was positive. I did it at 4 pm on Saturday, not having drunk since 12pm. We DTD that night. Sunday morning I woke up gagging, about to be sick but wasn't. Of course I know - I'm not mad yet - that it wasn't morning sickness But could it have been some kind of hormone, sperm-meeting-egg type thing??