We are all jolly well going to get preggers this month in a nonchalant non-psycho way, and hang onto it, and there will be no brooking of any argument whatsoever!

[ScreamIfYouWantToGoFaster]

Welcome across Rat Smackers! Glad you found the place okay. This is THE MONTH when we get those deceitful pee sticks to own up to the BLINDINGLY OBVIOUS - we are all already preggers! After all; positive people get positive pee sticks!

I hope you all like what I've done with our new home

You'll note the updated title, courtesy of farfalla. Various healthy snacks have been set out on the coffee tables, to ensure our bumps are receiving the appropriate nutritional balance

Also, my personal favourite adjustment, you'll note the strategically positioned peephole, right here, providing us with a sneaky preview of the utopian delights awaiting us in the NO BROOKING vomitorium ante-natal thread.

So let's get to it preggos! Remember: see a rat - smack it!

ok i will be good in future and not write any misleading posts!

the rat was smacked, apparently i am really obvious so DH was laughing and telling me he was scared of me. he was persuaded eventually...

my temp seems to be up so may have laid an egg eventually.

sorry to hear that have, keep in touch while you are lurking. :)

Wouldn't it be great to get 3 confirmations in one day? When are you thinking of testing Generic and dream?

I think the beginning of next week may be too early for me but would hopefully be ok around Wednesday. No idea what's going on with my cycles. Always been 28 days, then had 2 months of 26 and last month was 34. CD28 will be Sunday, but I know I didn't ov until CD17. I'm really hoping my luteal phase won't be short because of it so I'll be trying to ward off AF from this Friday onwards (but not really expecting her until earliest Monday). If I get to Wednesday which will be CD31 I may test then.

Aaaggghhh it's taking over my brain. The 2ww is definitely the worst part of the month. At least at the start you know there's nothing you can do and as soon as AF's gone the SWI can start. When SWI starts you know you're doing something. This bit is just stressy.

Anyone for croissants this morning?

Really sorry to hear your news Have be strong.

Scarlet have to agree I find the 2ww is the worst (maybe also because I'm control freak). It always starts off positive but then the closer it gets to AF due date I start to doubt everything. Very stressy indeed

Have to say I'm looking forward to this 3way testing, good luck everyone.

I have my HSG next week so kind of already stressing about that, anyone else had one?

Ooh Solars ta for the croissant. Not had HSG myself but I think Have has and she is always very helpful so will probably be along to tell you about it if she feels up to it.

Scarlet I am going to wait until Wednesday too because I think AF is due on Monday (although who knows as recently my cycles have been WTF ones, but I'm staying resolute in my determination that I am updiffed. So there [hear that, AF, YOU ARE NOT WELCOME])

Can I steal a croissant if I tell you about my HSG?

I didn't find it to be that bad - I'd read various comments about them before so wasn't sure what to expect. I do know though that Have's was more painful and she was sore afterwards. In terms of the procedure itself they got me to undress and put a hospital gown on and then lie up on the bed. The staff were super nice about it all and really reassuring. I have to say that given how reassuring they were being they were perhaps expecting it might be more painful than it was in the end (if that makes sense?) basically it started off like a smear with them putting the thing in (speculum?). Then the dye is inserted and that felt a bit like period pains but lower down, right down the bottom (near my lady bits ). They can tell you straight away what the results are because they (and you) can watch it on screen. I took a sanitary towel with me because you bleed / spot for a few hours after and I had had the measure of the massive hospital issue maternity towels before . They also said I might need painkillers but I didn't.

I should caveat the fact that mine was less painful by pointing out that I do have ds and I suspect maybe he cleared the way . I certainly found my post birth smear test a lot less uncomfortable than the ones before which were really difficult so maybe that is relevant? (Poor DH ).

Oh, and we got pg second cycle after it after 19 mths of zilch so good luck :)

I have just spotted a blue ramekin on the shelf in the kitchen at work. I work in an office - there is no reason why we would ever need to use ramekins. Clearly I am not the only rat smacker in town

Will catch up with everyone later!

Gu or M&S?

Most insightful Biscuits and might I add you are looking blooming marvelous, pinch away you are eating for two after all. I was told to bring a sanitary towel and also painkillers if I suffer badly from period pains. My consultant has even prescribed me antibiotics to be a taken an hour before the proceedure, which I found a little worrying to say the least . I was told that they wouldn't give me the results straight away and had to wait until my next gynae appointment which is not until the end of September - very annoying! Thank you again Biscuits

Imps is that a blue for boy ramekin?? I'm not sure i'm going to be able to take a ramekin seriously as a kitchen utensil after this thread :)

Sorry to hear about AF have. I had all my fingers and toes crossed for you

ooh, re the antibiotics, I think Have had a uti shortly after - could that be related?

Hi solars I'll share my hsg experience with you.

It was prior to DS (I got pregnant with him the cycle after and we'd been trying for ages)

The process was exactly the same as Biscuits described. Hospital gown, same position on bed as smear etc. There were 3 female members of staff including 1 doctor and 2 nurses who were all very nice. One of the nurses held my hand (even though I'd not asked her to but it turned out it was helpful to give it a squeeze). It was all over very quickly and absolutely fine until about the last 10 seconds where it felt like a very intense cramp type period pain which calmed down straight away. I was then fine for about 4 hours afterwards until later on that evening where I admit I did suffer a bit. To be honest it could have been my own fault as I went straight out funiture hunting after the procedure thinking I was fine when maybe I should have rested a bit. I felt much better the next day and fully recovered by the following.

They didn't tell me the full results there and then, just said everything was fine as far as they could see but that it would be studied more closely and I would then get the full results at follow up gynae appointment.

As it turned out I was 5 weeks pregnant by the time I had the follow up appointment. They said the scan showed my tubes were clear but it was possible that the dye pushed out a small blockage hence me becoming pregnant so soon afterwards (or it could have been a coincidence). They then arranged an 8 week scan for me which showed all was well. DS is now 2 and a half.

I have my fingers crossed for you that you have the same luck I did, both with the not too bad hsg and for conceiving so quickly afterwards.

Thank you so much Scarlet, yours and Biscuits experiences have certainly given me hope. I will definitely ask how the proceedure is going whilst I am there especially if I can see the screen (I'm assuming it's a screen they're looking at ??).

Biscuits the hotspot thingy would be quite useful in the situation perhaps?? Have to say Biscuits my husband too needs berating regarding the 'making me watch cricket' - the funniest thing was a couple of weeks ago, my husband was watching the cricket live at Lords, I was at home and found myself switching over to sky to find out the latest score

oh and Biscuits I think you could be right about the antibiotics and uti, perhaps there is a slight risk after this proceedure ??

oh have, I'm for you. I hope the issues resolve soon, ready for happy times ahead x

I don't mind sharing or my history being shared. My experience in terms of experience was much the same. One radiologist, three nurses. I an quite twitchy at the best of times and a lie pain threshold.I took co-codamol and Kalms beforehand. I'll be honest I found it quite painful. The word 'smarted' appropriate, it stung and hurt because my cervix opening is narrow (apparently) so he had to push rather than slide it in. It also caused lots of spotting (for rest of day), I took my own pad too! I think I basically spasmed afterwards so I cramped for two days then was diagnosed with a uti. I had had thrush which just cleared up before it which may have contributed. So not so much fun for me but I think that's worst case scenario! He did tell me at the time what he could see and turned the screen round (with my interest in science I thought that was very cool!).
Am chuffed people are saying I'm helpful. I have been indulging in chocolate and Thornton's special toffee and hiding in my office whilst chaos ensues elsewhere at work.

Oh, have, bad news on both counts. At least there is something and its fixable though. And I agree, miracles do happen so some no-stress shagging is a lovely idea!

solars, good luck for the HSG, I hope its not too bad- if you think it'll be bad you might be delighted its not as bad as you thought though!!!

I did not swi last night and am currently stressing that after the most immense shagathon ever i'll have missed a crucial night. I would definitely not test before wed, and as my last cycle was 34 days which would make af due next thurs, i'd only really count myself as 'late' at the weekend or friday at the absolute earliest. So may be slightly later than generic and scarlett. If i tested oin wed and it was a bfn i'd just try and kid myself i'd tested too early anyway... or be depressed a couple of days earlier than I need to. BOO!!! I am into despondency and i can't believe i could be preggers today, sigh. Plus its lashing, the baby only wants to walk, my back's killing as she'd MUCH rather hold a finger than practice by herself, she skived her morning nap, I missed a catch when she was falling- she gave her head a good whallop, and i've had to feed her to sleep... and its only 1 pm....

Still the thought of imps colleagues in the office nipping off to do a sneaky pee in a ramekin is cheering me up. Must shake off despondency and return to positivity...

What do we want? POSITIVE PEE STICKS
When do we want them? NOW!!! (or next wed- sun inclusive, not so fussy so long as its positive)

oooh, x-posted. Seems like if you're on this thread and have an HSG you get knocked up next cycle or the one after- marvellous news solars.

apart from the odd example (really sorry have posted that without thinking because I'm a total idiot...). However, they will sort out your DH and baby-have WILL be along shortly... Really sorry again....

Not to worry your second post made me laugh! :) who knows, maybe in 28 days I'll be back telling you the irony if a bfp the cycle after a Hsg when we dodgy really try?! (Blimey now I've started this positivity I can't stop!)

dream if i were you i'd be glad dd is a girl. Ds had go to to a&e after a trip to rhyme time at the library where he tripped over my foot and bashed his head on a square chair leg. When he sttod up (howling like a banshee i might add) the poor woman next to me nearly fainted and I burst into tears at the size of the lump that had come up. The nice library lady patched him up but he looked like a war veteran. He has also been to a&e after jumping backwards into the swimming pool and whacking his chin on the side on the way in. i got a call from dp who said' do you want to come to hosp with us, we've had a bit of an accident?' there was also the time he slipped on our wooden floor when running to answer the door, hit his head on the corner of the wall, blood everywhere, one very startled playdate wondering what the hell was happening......i could go on, the poor chap is only 3.9! Wait till she can walk on her own, life will never be the same!
on that happy note,
what do we want? positive pee sticks!
when do we want them? now!

ps ds may or may not be clumsier than other children.

Oh no ninja!! he sounds like an explorer!!! and a typical go-getter boy. She can do about 20 steps on her own now, and turn corners- hence why i'm dropping her more- she can get out of reach fast now. As she is a bit of a fool and didn't bother learning to crawl first she has got no idea about falling and literally holds herself rigid like a plank and goes down like that. We've already had a big, bruised, bleeding grazed elbow and (separate incident) massive egg on her head (which she feel asleep straight after, most unlike her, and i panicked thinking she had a head injury and rang DH at work who was most unimpressed and said let her sleep it off...) and she's only 11 months tmw. Still, I am reassured this does not seem to mean I am a Particularly Bad Mother

p.s. all but todays of my dropping/child injuring incidents were in public- why oh why must they do it in public!?!?

They do it to humiliate us! DP had to carry ds out of the swimming pool covered in blood after the chin incident! By the time they got me ds was sat in the car sucking on a lollipop looking happy as larry.
Way to go for your dd to be walking, thats great, if a little hard on your back.

Have enjoy your toffees and ironic BFP in the cycle where you don't try!

Dream sounds busy in your house today! Your DD is very clever walking already and I know I shouldn't, but your description of her staying rigid like a plank when she falls over made me laugh.

I'm sure she will be fine - as Ninja says, kids are always falling over and injuring themselves. My DD managed to fall head-first onto the hearth and bash her head on the sharp edge even though I was right there catching her at the time. She also skidded over in the bathroom once and banged her mouth into the edge of the bath, biting her lip. Ooh it makes the back of my knees shiver thinking about it

generic, i'm the same, i get upset/queasy at the thought of how much it must hurt! Clever?! Clever?! clever children don't do plank impressions to cause maximum brain injury by falling onto their head from their full height!!!! She's always been desperate to walk... thank goodness she might crack it before i develop an actual dowagers hump from stooping over so she can hold a finger.... otherwise she'll be the child in the playground saying 'no, that stooped old lady with the bent back over there, that's not my mum' and i'll holler "COOEEE!!!!! DD!!!!" and wave like a manic crazy lady at her