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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

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Original poster

Is weight really an issue?!

18 replies

troubled1 · 18/04/2011 15:46

I've been TTC for 3 years now without success been dr's and they are putting it down to my weight!
I have a DD 4 years old I've had quite a few MC's and a still born 3 years ago but have had nothing since I was over weight when i conceived all of these was abit smaller when i fell for my DD and ALOT bigger when i conceived but lost DS as I fell pregnant straight after DD

Just wanted some other peoples stories and some hope! i think my dr is just making excuses so not to help me!

OP posts:

RunnerHasbeen · 18/04/2011 15:54

Yes weight really is an issue, but not the only one, so you will find the stories you want to hear but will that really help you fall and stay pregnant? I can sympathise with the doctor being reluctant to help you if you are not taking their advice or doing anything to help yourself, not to mention the attitude you have towards them.

I think if you lose some weight, not only will your chances of conception improve, but the way you are treated will as well. I'm not implying it is okay to treat people preferentially by bodyweight, but more that working together and listening to each other works both ways and it sounds like you are only willing to listen to people saying what you want to hear.

Original poster

troubled1 · 18/04/2011 16:04

i have lost LOADS of weight (65lb) and still losing but it's still not enough for my dr who want's me to be a size 6 i am now smaller then i was when i fell for DD but i'm just feeling really low that every time i go back to dr's they are wanting more and more i can't see the light at the end of the tunnel atm

OP posts:

itchycoopark · 18/04/2011 16:05

If you're smaller now than you were when you got pregnant before then how can it be the weight?

Original poster

troubled1 · 18/04/2011 16:08

that's what i was thinking, but they will not investigate and other possibilities till my BMI is normal i'm still classified as 'over weight'

OP posts:

eurochick · 18/04/2011 17:03

I have PCOS and also post on a board dedicated to that (Verity) and a lot of women on there who were either not having cycles, were having anovulatory cycles or very long cycles have managed to regulate them by losing weight.

Lots of overweight women do manage to get PG, but if you are struggling, it might be worth giving it a go. I think the NHS "rations" fertility assistance according to BMI for a reason - it really affects success rates and they don't want to be spending NHS money if positive results are unlikely.

I very much doubt your doctor wants you to be a size 6... Well done on the weight loss so far.

DreamingOfABump · 18/04/2011 17:38

yep, it really does. x

stillstanding · 18/04/2011 17:44

We were ttc no. 2 for over a year. Then I lost a stone and - bingo - then I fell pregnant ... Suspect weight is one of many factors but it is a big one.

After the first year of trying we went to a fertility clinic to get tested to see if anything was wrong and they couldn't find anything but they said that they wouldn't even think about doing any treatments until my BMI was at a healthy level. And, as I said, as soon as I lost that weight (with some to go I might add) I did fall pregnant.

Bexamundo · 18/04/2011 20:01

I think whether it's true or not you'll get very little help until you shed the pounds. I'm the same weight my dsis when she got pg, took her a couple of months. I've been ttc for 15! Have lost 1 1/2 stone so far but still need to shed about a half a stone to be 'overweight' and prob two stone to be 'normal'. Of course, horrendous pms and chocolate cravings don't exactly help my cause! Good luck!

theghostofposhlymanor · 18/04/2011 20:53

I think it depends on how overweight you are really. If your BMI is 30+ then there's a chance it could be factor. But it could easily be something else. And they won't find out until you get at least basic tests. If your DP has a low sperm count, for instance, no amount of weight loss from you is going to make a difference. You need to be assertive with your GP, or see a different (perhaps more understanding) one.

Tanif · 19/04/2011 11:18

I agree with theghost. Despite a lot of, frankly unsupportive, comments on here, us fat lasses do manage to get pregnant with alarming regularity. GPs see weight as a way of narrowing the numbers with most kind of health problems and will say 'you're just fat, lose some weight and it will improve' as some kind of miracle cure all. I would find a more understanding doctor, or be more assertive with the one you have. After all, if you keep rocking up to the surgery time and again demanding some answers, sooner or later they'll get sick of the sight of you and do something useful.

Another thought, if you really are interested in losing the weight, when your GP gets unhelpful, why not ask about them referring you to a slimming club or gym? If your BMI is over 30, a doctors referral often leads to cut price rates.

stillstanding · 19/04/2011 11:52

I definitely fall into the fat lass camp, Tanif, but that doesn't mean that I can pretend it isn't a problem. Not only for getting pregnant (because statistically it is a problem even though plenty of fat people are lucky enough to dodge that bullet) but also for while you are pregant and for both the mother and child's health.

Of course, losing weight isn't a miracle cure and there could be other issues but the OP asks "is weight really an issue?" and the answer is "absolutely".

eurochick · 19/04/2011 11:57

I am a rare slimmish PCOSer (not through luck but because I work bloody hard to stay that way) but hanging around the Verity boards I have learned a lot about how weightloss can help conception. If you google you can find a lot of stuff about the connection between BMI and conception rates. Apparently a BMI of between 20 and 25 is ideal for conception.

PinkCustard · 19/04/2011 15:12

That's interesting Eurochick, will have to work out my BMI as I've been wondering whether being too slim cold be affecting my chances of conceiving. I'm a little bit lighter than I was when I conceived DS but we've been trying for 16 months now with no joy. And when I look at those friends of mine who also took longer to conceive they all seem to be the very slim ones - is this just me clutching at straws or could there be something in it?

I previously always thought that being too slim was only a problem if it stopped you from ovulating regularly and I'm in the process of having hormone levels checked over a 2 month period so hopefully the results will show that I am ovulating (I have regular periods and always get Peak days on my CBFM), but when it takes a long time you start to question everything.

I would say troubled that being healthy and eating well is important for conception and pregnancy, but just do your best, it's hard enough TTC long-term without blaming yourself when it doesn't happen. I think your GP should also do some basic blood tests and a sperm analysis to rule out other factors too.

eurochick · 19/04/2011 15:33

My slimmest friend is one of only two of my mates who have got duffed v quickly. She always had a very athletic figure and got duffed twice first time trying and the third time was an accident!

The annoying thing for me is that the first thing they tell most PCOS women TTC is to lose weight and that often helps, but it is not an option for me as I am already in the "ideal" zone (which is nice in other ways, but means there is no likely quick fix for conception!).

Tanif · 19/04/2011 16:09

I think we can establish that the real problem is that if there's a weight issue (either too heavy or too light) doctors will immediately assume that is the root cause and instruct the person to lose/gain weight rather than examining other potential problems.

Original poster

troubled1 · 19/04/2011 21:13

doctors are only going by the book & i understand that & 'wasting' money on helping people to conceive when weight is the only problem .......where i'm coming from is i truly believe there is another problem i've had a basic 'fertility blood test' and DP has had sperm check (private can't afford to do any more privately) all come back fine, my main reason for asking this question is that i feel my GP is not taking me seriously just because my weight (BMI bracket 'over weight') i've know many 'obese/ over weight' people who conceive just by looking at their DP/DH!! feeling pretty low after all my hard work losing what i think is a massive amount of weight (and feeling really good about myself) to only be knocked down again by GP i've still not managed to conceive. My GP also prescribed gym membership for as long as i need it and i was meant to get the form through in the post but never have even after 3 times bringing this up to GP! I'm reluctant to change GP as i'm not wanting to go through my whole history AGAIN and 'start all over again' i'm not really sure what if any answers so this is more of a rant really!!

OP posts:

stillstanding · 20/04/2011 12:16

Oh, troubled1, I do feel for you and so hope that things start going your way. You have lost a massive amount of weight (am v jealous!) and done very well and it must be a huge burden feeling that there is something else wrong and that your GP isn't focusing on anything else. You should ask again for the relevant gym form - it isn't your fault that he hasn't yet provided it - he should be embarrassed, not you.

goingmadtrying · 20/04/2011 12:51

Sorry your having problems with your gp troubled I too am in the fat lass camp and have been both times with my pregnancies, I am struggling this time and after Reading your post wonder if that's my problem, do you think it becomes more of a problem the older you get??

Can you not see another gp to ask for the basic tests, at least you would know then if any other problems :)

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