The 6th form post mc ttc and pregnancy common room Part 2

[brokenbarrenbrook]

Getting us started on a new thread; this one is gonna be a lucky one!

Just checking in to see how you're doing battery - pleased to hear it's stopped. I know you'll still be worrying but I hope you're coping; doubly hard when you're on your own. Pg after mc is certainly not the laidback carefree joyous experience it was pre-mc but we're all here for you x

yrmotb in awe of the gym, really must get my act together and do something. Trumpy is good btw as far as symptoms go

jolls can't we persuade you to poas tomorrow just to satisfy our collective curiosity?!

Feeling all and out of sorts. Another sis-in-law has sent through her scan picture. I just feel like someone has pushed a pause button on my life just as I was in mid-stride and everyone else is carrying on around me.

AandR Isn't it crap when people just send you these pics and it hurts you badly? I don't mind seeing strangers with bumps etc but when a close friend or family member tells me they are pregnant I find that the hardest. There is a particular frined of mine who I have not and won't tell about this pg because she has been trying for years and has had a mc last year. I want to tell her on our own so she can be upset and I can give her a cuddle.
(if this bean lasts)
You know your bean is coming but it does not help right now xxx

p.s belly fluff is fascinating I find xxx

AandR it's shit isn't it? Can I join you in the gloomy corner - my belly fluff very pleasant and most fascinating.... DS2 is 3 today, but I keep thinking I should be 7months pg by now :( And if three years ago I was giving birth, why can't I get there again?
Meanwhile I haven't done my latest OU assignment & so may fail final course for MA. And there's tumult afoot re DH's work so we may be moving country again in a year or less - or not. I HATE the not knowing.
Sorry for mememe post xx

jolls !!!!! . Congratulations, lovely, fabulous news!!!

battery how're things with you this morning? Hope there's been no more bleeding and you're feeling ok.

((( aandr ))) big hugs, it really is horrible. And I do understand that sometimes people have to tell you, but there are ways of doing so and I really don't get the need to flash scan pics around like some kind of badge of honour. In the 8 months I was waiting for this bfp I lost count of the fb pg announcements, birth announcements, scan pics, newborn pics I was bombarded with; it felt relentless. As battery said, your turn will come but that does not make things easier now x

Sorry x-posts, big (((hugs))) to zam too, sorry you're having a hard time atm x

jolls brilliant news!!!! So pleased for you - I hope my gloomy post didn't spoil your moment for posting such great news. You ladies getting pg is the best news of all to hear as it reminds me that even after all the shite there is likely to be a good outcome.

Thanks for all the lovely comments - Battery I think your approach is the right one.

Zam sounds like your life is in flux as much as ours is. Potential shifting of country is a big one. Happy Birthday for your DS - the milestones are a bit difficult, aren't they.

Just rushing in to say congrats to jolls and request the full 'just POAS' story

So happy for you

Back later xx

Morning ladies, looks like I've come back to a mixture of news.

Hugs for AandR Zam and Mouse and battery.

battery I hope everything has calmed down for you. Your hcg results looked fantastic so I'm praying it's just the bean getting comfy. Why do these things always happen at the weekends when the epus are shut though? Gah! I'm on clexane too (have the bruises to prove it!) and am wondering if now you've started it, it's just loosened things up a bit which may have caused the bleed? I hope you get the reassurance you need this week x

Mouse I am and by the way you are been treated at work. I hope you get support from your union - that's what they're there for so don't get pushed into a corner x

Zam and AandR I've been feeling pretty low this week too. We had a lovely time at my parents' house last weekend but I've had three more pg announcements this week. One was from a friend who e mailed me when I was pg last year to said she couldn't imagine having another baby yet - she'll now have one before me! The second was a friend I saw at Xmas who said she put on so much weight the first time round that it was putting her off having another. The third was a total and fantastic surprise from a schoolfriend who claims that 'something I said last October changed her mind about having a baby and resulted in her getting pg'!

This 2ww has been the hardest and by far the longest so far, it's felt like I've been counting every minute so Jolls WOOOHOOOOO!! your news has just made my day Congratulations!!! I have absolutely everything crossed that this is a very sticky one for you.

And whilst I'm there, do you mind if I hold your hand please? I had a v faint line on an internet cheapie yesterday and a faint line on a superdrug test this morning. I'm not due to test until Tues and don't want to get too excited just yet as this is what happened two months ago (the lines never really got stronger and I had cp) but for today, and until proven otherwise, I'm clinging to the fact that there is some sort of fertilisation/ implantation action going on!!

Ooh! Wiggle! That is FAB! Fingers crossed for lots of darkening lines to come!

Congratulations

really must go now...

Thanks mouse! My wish is for everyone on this thread to graduate to the freak out room before the first baby arrives over there (I think Nix is due at beginning of August!)

Wow wiggle how exciting!! congratulations!

Gosh this thread has turned into a real rollercoaster!!

Whoop! Hoooooooooge HOORAH for the TWPs and BFPs

Me and Nix are both due on 7th Aug. I too hope by then that this thread will be entirely empty with those dust thingies rolling through it. That would be ACE. :)

Woo hoo! 2 more BFP's to join the mentalling! Huge congratulations!!

Sorry quick post, hope zam and aandr are ok xx

< rushes in and grabs jolls and wiggle into her large bazookas >

Hooray for both of you. I can't belive jolls hasn't posted yet - we all want the details :) wiggle here's hoping that line gets darker :) am so pleased for you both.

zam limbo land is not a nice place to be. I hope you get some definite answers soon xxx

My bleeding has subsided (touch wood) but still spotting a tiny tiny bit. I don't know what to do about work tomorrow. I work an hour away, so don't know wether to call the hospital first or go to work and call them from there. oh the decisions.

have a good sunday everyone xx

Wow what a busy few weeks with BFPs, massive congrats to Jolls and wiggle

The rate we're going everyone will be off here before we know it.

I'm sorry that you are both feeling so down AandR and zam It is horrible finding out about other people getting pregnant. The thing that bugged me the most was the fact that I felt so pissed off about other people's happy news. I should be happy for them (and sure, I was) but mostly I was annoyed and depressed that it wasn't me, and that's not very nice. But MC isn't very nice all round.
The good thing about this thread, though, is that it really shows how everyone will get there in the end.

I'm not sure I'll be graduating anytime soon because that would actually admit that I'm upduffed. And if I'm not upduffed, I can't have another MC right? I'm staying in cuckoo land for a bit longer.

How are you today chookster

Big waves to everyone else xx

Hi All,

Issy I think in your case the doppler is a great move. I think its outrageous that mw's dont use them at 16 weeks - and the reasoning its just . FFS!! It IS important to catch an mmc at the earliest possible moment - if you dont infections, and the risk of Ashermans are greater. Private doctors over here do fanjo cam on the first appointment just the see if there is anything to see. OK, so they need to justify their fees and the scanner machine that they bought, but it shows that you can give so much more care and attention to pregnant women if you want/can afford to. You might be able to tell, I am feeling very ranty about this. Even though I dont live in the UK anymore, I still want to be proud of it - but the third world Costa Rica health service that cant afford to give women epidurals in labour is going to doppler me at my next appointment at 16 weeks!!! How can Britain be offering a poorer service than here??!!!

wiggle I am smiling ear to ear reading your news I know you'll be anxious until you see some nice dark lines - hope they come on really fast for you so we can all give you a proper big whoop whoop

jolls more for you too, looking forward to the CB digi's verdict.

battery oh no! the last thing you need is this! so sorry its causing all this worry. glad to hear its stopped, and I second the suggestion to pop over to recurrent buns to ask about clexene (or start a thread), I am sure it is related and you need as much reassurance as you can get to help you de-stress.

Zam big hug for you. Hope you enjoy DS's birthday, mine is also 3 on the 11 June.I am looking forward to it, because he really seems to understand what it is all about so much more than last year. I am also living under the (slight) threat of moving country, but I havent been taking it very seriously. DH just got Italian citizenship (via his great grandfather) and now wants to apply for jobs in the E.U. The way I see it, I spent all of last year making plans around a future baby which never showed up, now i think planning is pretty pointless, you never know how things are really going to work out - so I am just operating on a "deal with it if it happens" basis.

AandR sorry about the scan-pic. Sis in law is the worst in my opinion, mine was a few weeks behind me in her pregnancy when I mc'd and its been SO hard following the whole pregnancy and birth. I still look at her baby and calculate the age mine would have been every time I see him. Sorry no advice, just sympathy. xxx

mouse getting the union rep in for the meeing is a great idea. and you can use it to postpone the meeting to when they are available too. Tell them you have already taken advice and that is the way its going to be or no meeting. Watch them start to get scared and back off as soon as you start standing up to yourself.

waves to owl freezing babe bbb and travelling/lurkingLadyB

A&R Know how you feel. It's shit. I ended up deleting and blocking a ton of people on FB after getting sick of constant pregnancy announcements, births, updates of what sort of shit their child had done today (seriously), moaning about being pregnant, gushing about their perfect family day out. Bore off! Every time I saw one, I wanted to write something rude but thankfully never did . A day after my third mc, my best mate came over for the weekend and announced she was 13 weeks pregnant and produced a scan picture. Horrid. I felt terrible as I had to pretend being happy for her. I was of course, but God it was so difficult not to be a bitter twisted bitch! You've just got to have a bit of self preservation and if that means withdrawing from being bombarded with baby stuff for a while, so be it. It helped me.

jolls I knew this was going to be a lucky thread, I just didn't realise how lucky! This is the one jollipops, I have everything tightly crossed that we end this two year journey together xxx

wiggle yey! quiet squeal with excitement. Keeping everything tightly crossed for you too that this one is a sticky xxx

Izzy I'm astounded that after your history that your mw isn't taking that into consideration! That is absolutely shocking! Is there anyone you can appeal to?

battery glad to hear that the bleeding has subsided. Hope that this is the end of the stress for you now xxx

Hope everyone else is OK and that you've all had a good weekend.

Woooohoooo for jolls and wiggle it's all getting flipping exciting in here!!

Hooray to jolls and wiggle fingers firmly crossed that darker lines follow.
battery hugely sorry abuut the red bleed. I don't know whether the clexane (or aspirin? are you on that too?) would cause it as such - maybe if you were going to bleed because of implantation it might make it more 'flowy'? but please do hold on to the 'no cramps' thing, I think that's really quite key in that your progesterone levels must still be high to stop the uterus contracting and it obviously isn't trying to get rid of anything. Best of luck.
AandR and Zam I will link arms with you when I re-surface (albeit upside-down) in NZ, this'll probably be my last post for a bit as my final list of stuff to do now that DH and DS have flown out is ENORMOUS.
Best press on with it.
Will be hoping for only good things when I log on again.

I am watching TOWIE and just heard some use the expression "Keith Cheggers (Preggers)" Apologies in advance for repeat future use, I think its my new favourite expression for up the duff.

Mouse good luck with the meeting - I really think you should take someone with. I think you need to start by ignoring the options on offer and going back to the root of the problem - namely your head has failed to support you throughout your difficulties and has made them far worse and this needs to be sorted out as a priority. The offer then needs to be seen in the light of this background. Frankly from what you've described it sounds like a campaign of bullying and harrassment on her part and she's doing a great job of creating a case for you of constructive unfair dismissal plus sexual discrimination. I'd also suggest taking advice from ACAS and putting this on the HR threads again. There must be constructive steps which would allow you to return to work and build things up again but these do not sound like them at all. If you think that it is impossible to work there then you need to consider how best to get out with the most compensation possible.

Izzy I didn't realise you were a solicitor too. I had ds when I was an nq and left private practice recently to go in-house which is amazing. I kept on waiting to see if I'd get pg but when it didn't happen decided to sort out at least the part of my life that I had slightly more control over. It was a very good decision and 3 months after starting the job I finally got pg.

jolls congratulations. I hope this one is really here to stay.

Official congratulations to jolls!

And whispered congrats to wiggle - hoping the next few days fly by for you. Are you on prednisolone at the moment? Any side effects?

Wow, thank you so much for the job advice ladies. tigger I'm really grateful for your POV sometimes I think it'd be easier to just roll over and let her get on with it but who knows what the next 12 months have in store for me (possibly more of the same ). Hopefully the union will help me see the best possible route to take through all of this. Luckily I have evidence that all my targets were fully met last year so she can't start saying she's had concerns prior to the mc(s). Ugh. All I wanted was a baby. I feel like my whole life has imploded.

Big waves and lots of luck to ladybee looking forward to your first post from NZ

Congrats to all the BFP ladies, especially hairy Hope this is it for you my love