TTC - To shag consistently or on those all important days?

[sunnyg]

Hi everyone
This is my first post so please excuse lack of knowledge a re acronyms etc!

It's only my 2nd month TTC but I already have a few questions from you ladies in the know.

So am using Clear blue Fertility Monitor and on first month didn't see any peak. Was told that was quite normal. Now on 2nd month and have just had 2 peak days. So that's good. In first month myself and the hubbie went for trying to focus baby making on or around those specific ovulation days. On our second month we thought perhaps more consistent (every 2-3 days) baby making was better. However by the time these 2 peak days came around, yep you guessed it, hubbie felt too pressured etc and no joy on these peak days. Tried not to react like a crazy woman, but I suspect I actually did.

So my question is, for the future would you recommended 'focused' baby making or more of the same consistent styled baby making?

Although we have only been trying 'properly' for 2 months we have actually not been using conception for over a year and I'm 34 very soon so you see where this is going.....!

Any thoughts or tips would be gratefully received!

Hi, I have only just started TTCing and so have been making a, ahem, concerted effort on the allegedly important days but also just for the hell of it!

I am not using any fertility stuff, and people I know who have used them have advised against doing so at first as it can make everything seem a bit clinical. My GP advised to do it every 2 to 3 days if you can, rather than when you think you may be ovulating, so maybe try that. (And if you're using the fertility stuff, keep it to yourself, he'll never know!)

maybe you should consider doing it a few days b4 u ovulate?? The only way you know this is by monitering your temps, cervical mucus and positioning?? Taking charge of your fertility is a fab book, i highly recommend it!!
Good luck, this is now my 6th cycle with no joy. X

first time round i was a "slave to the machine" and we did it every two days around the right time, and didn't do it for 3-4 days before ovulation.

18 months, no luck. impatient me, IVF, very lucky, first time conceived DS1

second time, conceived DS2 first month of trying - we just went for it for all the days before/around/after (for good measure!) ovulation time, no monitor.

i'd ditch the machine at least for first few months of trying and just have fun fun fun!

very very good luck.

maybe you should consider doing it a few days b4 u ovulate?? The only way you know this is by monitering your temps, cervical mucus and positioning?? Taking charge of your fertility is a fab book, i highly recommend it!!
Good luck, this is now my 6th cycle with no joy. X

My Gp suggested three times a week every week. Doing it too much depletes the quality of his sperm. I try not to tell Dh when I work.because of performance anxiety! As ladies above say, realistically try to go for every day/every other day the week if your expected peak. Charting will help you understand your fertile phase better. Would def recommend above book. Try going in www.fertilityfriend.com where you can do online charting which helped me a lot.
Initially though I'd just encourage your man to ravishing you regularly!

Ditch the clearblue monitor as of now; these things are themselves not without problems. They work on the misleading principles that there is only one rise in LH every month and that such a rise is followed by ovulation. Its not the case at all.

Timing of intercourse is certainly not to be recommended; it can make the man in particular feel used.

Take the pressure of yourselves; ovulation is not an exact science. Make love when you both feel like it and forget any idea about it being "ovulation time". Two or three times a week throughout the month is fine. Trying to self predict ovulation is nigh on impossible to do with any degree of accuracy (blood tests would give a more accurate result).

What are your periods like generally; if they are irregular in nature then it is better to seek medical help sooner rather than later.