Feisty Fabulous Forty somethings - part 2

[Curlylox]

woohoo over here

thanks jolls. am thinking I won't go to scary clinic woman for that treatment - it will bankrupt me. I can get some treatment on Bupa apparently (through my company)so I will look into somewhere that is recognised by bupa (scary clinic lady isn't )

BB MummyAbroad has already replied to my post on MC thread and she'll be in touch - she's a diamond! Very knowledgable and totally lovely! x

Hello BeatieBow (and jolls ) Sorry to hear you think you might have AS. I started a thread about AS over here happy to answer any questions. If you havent found it already, please get yourself signed up to this yahoo group - the ladies on here have been collecting info about AS for 10 years, the files section is very informative and there are thousands of women with AS who can answers questions too. Feel free to PM too is that is easier.

hi there, thanks mummyabroad I'll come to the thread (just had a quick look) and look round the yahoo group.

Can I ask you something - I had a scan and my womb lining was apparently good. could I still have asherman's syndrome with this? Also, the dr referred to in that thread - you all seem pretty certain that he is the only/best dr. Do we avoid local doctors? Sorry all those questions - i'll come and read the thread properly soon I promise. (a bit scared that this is my problem tbh and not sure that I will go ahead anymore now).

Hi Beattie I now how scary it is, but just remember that AS IS treatable as long as you get yourself in the right hands, sadly lots of doctors who have no experience will tell you they can treat you (when they are only likely to make things worse) and lots will tell you cant be treated at all (which is BS), they are the ones to run from!

re questions

1. Yes, you can have a "good" lining and still have AS. Lining measurements can be inaccurate - were three measurements taken? How many times have you been measured? Also keep in mind scar tissue does not show up on an ordinary ultrasound scan, and sometimes the walls of the uterus can be stuck together, this also doesnt show up unless some kind of liquid (saline or contrast dye) is used to show the uterus in a 3d state. Finally, scar tissue can be localised to the cervix area so the lining builds up but the blood cant escape during your period. However a thick lining midcycle (7mm or greater) would indicate a lesser problem, either there is not much damage to your endometrium and/or you havent had AS for a long time.

2 The yahoo group keeps lists of doctors. The A list are considered the best, they are doctors who follow a recognised protocol for treating AS, and generally know each other. The only two A listers in the UK are Dr Lower (private only) and Dr Trew (private and NHS) B list are doctors recommened by A listers, and C listers are ones who have treated other AS members, all the phone numbers/contact details are available as well as members comments about the treatment they received and the outcome. Some A listers will answer emails/phone calls for free too. Dr March is one of the best in the world and he has helped me lots of times via email, you can send him your scan pictures to review and see what he says (although he will probably recommend you do an HSG)

Once again, I know its scary as hell reading anything about AS, but it is really worth doing your research before agreeing to any treatment plans. Take care xxx

BB, you see, told you she was good!

Morning all - throat still like razor blades and sticky sore eyes. All tres attractive. CD23 and think bastard arse bollocks feckin' RTD is on her merry way. Trace of caramel CM last night. Hey ho, let's not think about it...

thanks for this mummyabroad I have emailed Dr Lower (nothing like acting quickly!) - my lining was apparently 9.2mm just before ovulation. I spoke to my clinic too and they say this would indicate ashermans wasn't a problem, or if it was it would be mild. But I do wonder if my womb lining is so good, where does it all go to??

jolls arseicles! (as hippy would say!). its a bugger isn't it when rtd turns up. Then a day or two later, back comes the optimism.

Sat through a meeting yesterday looking at a colleague's swollen tummy. Another newly pregnant person (or she had put on alot of weight in one place). and then went for coffee with my friend who had mcs last year and is now 34 weeks pregnant. it's very hard.

hippy how did your interview go?

lou any smiley faces yet? I'm only cd 3, but looking forward to opk time!

hello

quickly read through messages and will respond properly tomorrow. lovely dm had children and lovely dp took me away for couple days but he back at work tomorrow so heading home soon

:) x

Hi BB no smiley face yet but only cd9 so not freaking out YET!!!!

Jolls you sound crap....Hope you start to pick up soon X

Hippy and Jolls sorry to upset you but Georgie is worthy of your tears.

Much what cd you on now? Hope you got LOADS of swi in

Diege Hi welcome back.Well done on all your extra work XX

Panashe hope you had a nice break.Where did you go?

Had a lovely time last night.Saw my possey of personal midwives.The remembrance book is gorgeous my family all made their entries.They are spending the rest of the charity money on furnishing a room away from the ward for women like me experiencing a stillbirth.They [theres 3 midwives i had a lot to do with and delivered Georgie] and the ward manager all want to care for me when i go in for Gbos.They are truely lovely.

What's wrong with me.......I feel quite to offload here....a few weeks ago I flew into a rage oversomething quite minor (most unlike me) and now for the past week I'm crying at a drop of a hat even now as I am typing this. Cried when I dropped dd off at breakfast club before I went to work, cried in front of my pilates teacher when she asked me how I was, don't want to engage in any conversation in the playground when I drop off/collect dd to/from school in fact I don't want to do anything at all......there I said it. Sorry and thanks for reading.

Oh Curly It does sound from your description that you might be a tad depressed. Obvously you know yourself better than anyone else, but the thing about not wanting to see anyone etc does ring a bell.
On a happier note I declare the Friday bistro open! Curly has first orders today
I have a bit of a migraine brewing so am keeping it simple. Homemade chicken pie with shortcrust pastry, with mash and gravey, followed by rice pudding with a homemade shortbread biscuit on the side. White wine spritzer to drink.

sorry - all running late in Jollsterhouse tonight.

Bistro order; tonight I fancy Seafood Fajitas! With extra Guacamole pls. And then I would like Creme Brulee... Raspberry. And not the little ones they serve in restaurants, I want an industrial size pls. And then some G&B Butterscotch. Tvm, diege you are so kind.

curly ... wasn't sure whether to post this as I didn't want to sound all "me too, me too, let me have the spotlight" But I have also been wondering whether I have dipped into depression. Very unusually for me I have a really short fuse, and have to count to ten a LOT. I have also been crying a lot. Most days I cry once or twice, often at legitimate sad things, but also at lesser ones. I've also avoided some situations/people where I know I can't get away with floating in and out IYKWIM. So I only post to say I know how you're feeling and I sympathise. I don't have any clever answers :(. Do you have anyone you can talk to? Do you have a sympathetic GP? How do you feel tonight? Where abouts are you in your cycle? Are you about to Ov? Does that make you tearful? Big Sussex squeeze to you tonight.

Love to all.

Off to watch EE as missed it earlier. xx

Curly is there anyone you can talk to in rl? I hope you can find some help soon to help you feel better.

Hi all.I 'll join you all in the bistro but not to eat just booze please!!!!!!!!!!!!! Already eaten!!!!!

Everyone else ok?

A bit sad tonight been to the pub for a couple of cheeky drinks but it just makes me sad to be doing stuff like that when i should/want to be at home with Georgie.My sadness comes up to bite me when i least expect it.Going to bed.Tomorrow is another day XXX

Morning

Hope you all ok...I am sat in bed on laptop feeling a little guilty as dp gone off to do long shift. We just had a couple of nights in Manchester in nice hotel, relaxing.I find it hard to act 'fine' around the children all the time so it was good to have some time out.
I did a pt this morning and think it one of the few times in my life I wanted it to be negative, and it was :) So at least I know if I do one in two weeks then I will get true result. Not going to stress too much this month, just hope af returns when expected.

BeattieBow know what you mean about name changes,have done a couple of times, my exdh found me when I was posting about our break up a few years ago. I guess I am being greedy like you as I had 4dc with exdh ages 12-19.And also never had problem with conceiving etc so my mc was very unexpected and felt like my body was letting me down. I know you mentioned Ashermans, don't know anything about it, and that you have had other tests,suppose when you haven't had problems before you start to think there must now be something wrong but it just could be a waiting for a good egg game.

SameOld Hope you are feeling better, and that you may be preparing to test next week??
I admire your strength to keep going, in my head I have thought if this happens two more times then I would have to stop. I truely hope you get your 'golden' egg :)

Hello CurlyLox I hope you are feeling a little brighter today. Just the thought of the days getting longer makes a difference to my mood, just makes me feel more positive. Your cycle took a long time to get back to normal but hopefully it is now. did you have a natural mc ?

louisesh Am sat here struggling to find words which is crap I know. I am just so very sorry for you.My friend had twins that were born sleeping but there were genetic reasons. She went on to have two sons and the boys know they had two other brothers and her Dad wrote a beautiful poem which is framed and on the wall with their pictures. Your circumstances must be unbearably hard and the constant 'what ifs' must plague you. You sound like you are very open about your experience, and that you got wonderful care from your hospital.xxx

hippy am sorry about your mc, but I do hope that you keep on trying, although I imagine it must get harder.I guess realistically we know that chances of mc are higher I was told that 2 weeks ago at epu,but we also know that it can happen and does happen, and if we strong and patient enough it will happen :) Your shocked faces at your age made me laugh

hello to everyone else x

Hello! Hope you all enjopyed your bistro meals last night - Louise's booze order cleared out supplies though, so must order some in if we're having a mid-week one again.
Panache I don't think I've said hello? I've also got 4 dcs so am in the greedy club. Had an early (7 weeks) mc 3 mths ago, and a mmc 2008 before ds was born (dc4). Have been trying 9 mths now, having formally got pregnant after 1 to 5 mths trying with the dcs. Temping, doing opks, and taking agnus castus and this mth vit B6 (thanks for info btw BB - do you know the rationale for stopping taking after ov?). Feb also a sad mth for me (as for many on here) as due date for mmc was Feb 13th.
Anyway, on a happier note only 85 scripts left, though am having to work solidly through the weekend as behind now on 'real' job. Cd 10 I think, and not pos opk, but have promised dh tonght, so I suppose am reluctantly in vest and pants phase
Love to all I will try and keep up a bit more now that the immediate marking pressure is off.

Hello Diege, nice to meet you, another mum of four :) Sorry about your mc, do you mind me asking how old you are ? I have heard B6 is good and noticed it in my Alpen, I like marmite on toast and am sure that is full of B vitamins.

Had agnus castus once and thought I was going to die - it gave me the most horrendous stomach cramps I've never had. This was years ago and I think was something I read in a book that it was good for pms ??

Is this just a small group, or the reality that not many ttc over 40 ?

morning all

good q panashe, I think in reality of course there are less women TTC in their 40s. But there are more on other threads on MN that I hear talk about getting pg in their forties, they've just not found us here, or not wanted/needed to share their TTC journey perhaps?

Good news diege on scripts, boo on having to work proper job this weekend though :(.

Right must shake a leg and get out into the sunshine, there are squirrels to chase and geese to feed. x

hi all. curly would agree with others that you sound depressed. Do you think it is worth going to the drs? Alternatively I suppose you could try things like exercise, healthy eating etc which are meant to boost seratonin (or summat!). anyway, this time of year is pretty bleak I think.

Like jolls I also feel that I am as well (and my dh thinks I am), but often I just think I just feel sad not depressed. anyway, have drunk alcohol this week and it definitely has a depressant effect on me, and that along with a few late nights has made me feel a bit rubbish. I am going to try to eat healthily, have no alcohol and have some early nights, see how that makes me feel.

Lovely day here now, I am going to go out and get some sun (if I can drag the dcs away from the wii that is!).

I'll join you on your quest for health BB! I have relapsed over the last few days with the work pressures, but have been feeling so much better going to the gym and eating healthily. How are is the 'shredder' going?Jolls do you actually have geese? Was chased down the school footpath by 2 as a child and have never forgotten their hissy anger.
Panashe. I am 40, 41 in May this year. Did you say your age? How old are your LOs? . I ma taking the ac and vit B for a short luteal phase which I've read can contribute to early mc/fertility problems. Hadn;t heard ac could have such effects
Dh has taken dcs to supermarket, so that I can work so had better get off here just in case he gets back early

Thank you SameOldJollster! Didn't want to gatecrash. Sitting here with large cup of tea, terrified. I want this to be a success story - but I know statistically it might not be. I've spent the last year searching for good news stories, so thought I'd post straight away just in case there are other addicts out there who need to hear something positive.

Sorry - for those of you who AREN't psychic...

I've been addicted to ttc threads for the last year. Finally, I've got a BFP - I'm 44, going to be 45 next month.

It's very very early days (13 dpo) - and I know the possible heartaches that could come. For now, though, I'm just sitting here kissing the blue line and thanking whoever that we had a chance to see what one looks like.

Is there anyone else out there who could keep me company while I sweat this out?

Hi all..

Panashe thanks.I hear many stories of people concieving after stillbirth so this gives me hope and now thats all ive got.Georgie WILL not be in vain and thats partly how i feel if we were to give up now.Won t anyway as we ve no other children.

*JollS you sound a bit better?

Diege SNAP....cd10 here also.swi done already today....give me a gold star!!!!!

BB hi you ok???

Welcome lolfactor congrats.FX for you....Is it your first? XX

mmmmm................the booze was good yes we definatly need more1!!! chin chin!!!!!

As i say cd10 here no smiley face as of yet but we re "hard" at "ye oldie ems plan" so no worries this month!!!!

Who am i trying to kid......

ooh Louise you've got it out of the way . I have it all to look forward to tonight, and not even a glimmer of a second line on my opk. Dh has agreed to sme this month after me saying you ot were all ging to be at it. With our synchronised cycles we'll produce enough energy to run the National Grid I need to book a smear for next mth, so if not successful I'll then have to take a mth off (have v.dodgy smear history and would need op if bad result - not great in pregnancy).
Hi Lolfactor and many congrats! I'm sure we'll all want to interrogate you about the ins and outs so to speak. For now, enojoy that line!

Hello all! A bit as I've been lurking for a while and although I am ttc and 40, you all seem to have been through so much and I am in the incredibly privileged position of never having suffered a mc or stillbirth so I was too shy before! I have 2 ds, ds 2 is being assessed for AS so I've been posting on the SN threads before now. You all seem lovely and I'm in awe of the work you put into getting pregnant. Because of ds2 I'm still thinking 'oh shit' about getting a BFP as much as a BFN! Is that weird? Anyway have to go - can't do this very often!

Will post again now I've lost my ttc thread virginity!

Hello all,
Another first time poster.. Also totally in awe of the courage and support on this thread, what an amazing lot you are!
I'm 40, TTC since last summer, have DD - nearly 3, terrified of getting pg but really want to!
Curly - I got post natal depression and took a supplement called 5HTP which pretty much saved me! It's a herbal thing, not addictive and no side effects, can't recommend it enough.
So glad I found this thread, been feeling a bit wobbly, nice to know I'm not alone in the Fab 40's!!