Feisty Fabulous Forty somethings - part 2

[Curlylox]

woohoo over here

Mitzimaybe Greetings and welcome, of course you can join us.

Lou so pleased, still grinning.

lia I might be interested, can you send me the link or post it on here?

Thanks Italian XXX
Hi Mitizimaybe welcome X
Lia whoop whoop 4 days hope little Lia isn t late!!! Surely not???? I m one of 4 and by the time my mum got to my youngest sister she was way early and had a virtually non-exsistent labour.Kate was born on the doorway of A&E at the entrance to the hospital,surely, by your 6th your the same????
Gum thanks.As we say you ain t out till the fat lady sings!!!!

Hi all hope everyone's well.Bit of a mixed day today off to collect Georgie's ashes as we re off to have her paperweight made tomorrow.I m glad to bring Georgie home but Ant is dreading it .As i see things these ashes don t seem real to me i still think of Georgie as the darling baby we held and her spirit is with me all the time anyway.Another hard task for us to do.

lia that email looks interesting, would you be able to pass my details or give me their details please? Wow can't believe you're due in 4 days your pregnancy seems to have flown past...well perhaps not for you though

Welcome Mitzimaybe sorry about your mc, how far gone were you? Please feel free to share quite a few of us have experienced a mc so can relate to how you feel. Will try and explain the abbreviations:
mc - miscarriage
swi/swoi - shagging with intent/without
dpo - days past ovulation
poas- pee on a stick
bfp/bfn - big fat positive/negative
opk - ovulation predictor kit
ff - fertility friend
fx - fingers crossed
There may be more or I could have got a couple wrong.
I will also post our list if I can find it of our details too.

Hello! Massive congrats to Lou - that's brilliant news
Back from Cardiff last night - very tired, and also seems that the cyclizine isn't working anymore . Very nauseaus and also being sick 4/5 times a day, so am now combining the meds with vit B6, and will contact GP again next week if no joy. Really want yto avoid being signed off work/having to go ti hossie like last time. On the positive side, I have never had sickness with a mc, so at least the stickiness of this bean looks good!
On the early scan front I have been playing phone tag all week with the EPU, so will try again and get something sorted. They don't scan here usually unitl 8 weeks anyway, so no massive rush.
Will catch up later and open up the bistro - I will have to have a segregated area though so that I don't get a whiff of anything spicey!

Lou and Diege have had BFPs, yay!

BeattieBow - 40: 5 children - 2 sons (12 and 2) 3 daughters (10,8,6,). Wanted one more to make it up to 6, mmc Feb 10. 3 cps since then, but nothing since Sept.

Curlylox - 43 (44 in May): 1 DS 21, 1 DD 6, ttc since Dec 2009 got a BFP Jan 2010 then mc 10 weeks 6 Feb 2010.

Diege - 40: 3 daughters (9,8,5) 1 son (20 months). Have been trying this time for 10 months (mc at 7 weeks October 2010).

Hippychick - 44: 2 sons aged 7 & 10. Decided to try for a cheeky last baby about aug 09. One MMC in Feb 2010 and 1 MC in June 2010. (8 months since last MC - longest trying time for me).

Hopefulgum - 44 (45 in Nov): 5 DC: ranging 19yrs to 2 years, ttc since May 2010, mmc 10 weeks Dec 2010.

Isaboo - 42 (43 in July): 2 sons 7 & 10 trying to squeeze a last one in from July 2010 one MC at 10 weeks Oct 2010

Jollster - 43 (a few days ago so still in mourning grin): one DS 2y9m. TTC#2 since June 09, 3 MMC all around 11-13 weeks. Recurrent MC tests all clear, now TTC again, on month 5 (longest I've tried without a BFP).

Lolfactor - 44 (45 in march :-/): 3 teenagers, ttc since Jan 2010 - 3 cps so far.

louisesh - 40: no living children, Georgie stillborn at 41 weeks 10th October 2010. Ttc since January 2008. MMC October 2008, MC September 2009, CP December 2009 and CP December 2011.

OooohShiny - 39 (40 in Oct ) no children (1 MC almost 4 years ago). Decided to start TTC in April 10 when my last DEPO was due and didn't go ahead with it but then had no AF until Jan this year

panashe - 41 2ds 19,12 2dd 15,13 tcc (with new dp) since sept 2010. mc 8 weeks 2011.

TinaO99 - 42: 1 daughter (19) TTC since December 2010, one MC/CP in Sept 10

thinking of you today lou and welcome also to Mitzimaybe I also had a mc last year so I can fully sympathise with how you're feeling and gum is right they are a great bunch on here

Thanks Tina X
Thanks Diege how awful you feel so crap,does your ms normally last a long time? Im lucky [in this sense only!!!] don t really suffer with m.s.

Georgie's home well,her ashes are.Really, i can t relate my baby to this little box and as i said to the funeral director i hope to god thats the last time i step in to a funeral palour for a very,very,very long time.

Thanks for the welcome and the bit about you all. I started writing about my miscarriage (in response to Curlylox) but it was turning into War & Peace so I'll spare you that and try to keep it brief. In your style it would be:

Mitzi - absolutely ancient (47.) No children, not TTC per se but no contraception for 18 months without result until this year. MC started at 6½ weeks, two weeks of hell, just finished at 8½ weeks.

In slightly more detail: I don't have any children, mainly because I spent over 20 years with the wrong man. In 2009 I started seeing a lovely man 10 years younger than me (!) and we've never used contraception because I thought I was too old to conceive (but didn't mind if I did.) When my period was late (in Feb) I thought it was probably the start of the change but I kind of felt pregnant... etc. Unfortunately only a week later I started cramping & bleeding, when I was only 6½ weeks gone (from SMP date.) It took another two weeks of an awful emotional roller-coaster from despair to joy and back again ? "there's not much hope" - "it might be OK after all" - "no, it's not, you're definitely losing it" ? "it's still there, might progesterone supplementation help?" ? "nothing we can do to save it" etc. However repeat scan this Wednesday showed it's finally gone.

I'm surprised at how weepy and devastated I feel, given that it wasn't planned and was with me for such a short time, but the nurse practitioner explained that my hormone levels are plummeting right now (like PMT but many times worse) so, even if I didn't have something to grieve over, I'd most likely be feeling weepy and emotional anyway.

I'd kind of like to try again but my bf (having watched me go through agony the last 2 weeks) doesn't really want to. I'd be happy to go with a "que sera sera" attitude except that I suspect my progesterone levels may be too low and if I want to get that investigated, supplemented etc. then I know it's likely to be a huge struggle with doctors and I'd need my bf to be in it with me.

OK still a bit war & peace-ish ? sorry! - but believe me it's a lot shorter than it could have been. Obviously more details available on request.

mitzi hello and welcome. So sorry to hear about your recent MC. It is horrible, I know. I think nearly everyone on here has been through similar and we all feel for you. Whatever you decide to do about TTC - do feel free to hang around and chat to us. Oh by the way - don't get excited about the Friday Night Bistro - it's all feckin' virtual food!!!

lou My heart breaks just imagining bringing home a child of mine's ashes. Oh God here I go with the tears again, woman!

Anyway, what I was gonna say was, when we scattered my dad's ashes i said, "This isn't really you Dad, you were so much more than this. You meant so much more to many people." Obviously that was an old man who had had a good life and had produced children and grandchildren and with Georie it is so much more unfair that she died. But the fact remains. She was so much more than just the ashes and in your head she will always be that beautiful little girl you held in your arms. Sending you one of my super duper 'squeeze you too tight' hugs, my love.

Hi Mitzimaybe and a big fat welcome. So sorry about your mc. You're in good company on this thread.

It's good to know there are others out there who've been with the wrong partners and found new younger lovely ones. Do go to the Doctor and check out the progesterone; it would help to know anyway, regardless of whether or not you want to conceive. I was mortified to go to my doctor (a friend of my teenage daughter's) and explain that I'd now got a younger partner, who doesn't yet live with me, who wanted a baby and could she check to see if it was all ok. I mean, how flaky is that? But she was brilliant - kind and supportive. And the nurse said 43? Just go for it. That's nothing these days.

I'm now 45 next week, 3 cps and an mc at 5 weeks (Dr's timing) - BUT, still trying. The mc was only last month - and I've just been through the same tears. Although we're a little traumatised, we both feel happy that we shared that little moment; we were never sure that we would. Your previous modus operandi sounded great. I was going to say 'suck it and see' but I don't think that's part of the SMEP plan

Diege bad luck with the voms. How long did this last with your previous pregs?

Lou so so happy for you. A picture of your bean? Have you seen it? I hope so. Aren't those pictures lovely.

all 'waves'. Hiya. No symptoms after initial long list of them. Was gutted. Now 4 days before due to come on and smear of beige (spotting?), digging-like niggling intermittent pain in one side, cramps and mildly tingling boobs. I'm wondering if it's one of those cyst things, when the egg doesn't come out properly. Can't think of the name. Think those have similar symptoms. Has anyone else had this?

Lou read your message about Georgie AFTER posting my last. So sorry to be crass. Your little bean was uppermost in my thoughts, but Georgie is uppermost in yours at the moment - as she should be. Much love ((()))

Oh lol have same symptoms as you except for beige smear thingy and due on in 2 days. Mitzy sorry for your loss and all what you posted about grieving is normal. I remember breaking into floods of tears standing on the platform waiting for my train, in the supermarket, in the office at work etc etc. I echo what lol says about still getting fertility checks done regardless, oh and SMEP means sperm meet egg plan ( this involves lots of shagging]

lol are you sure the symptoms you have aren't implantation??

I like the sound of virtual food at the friday night bistro - calorie free and having just purchased some rather 'snug' size 12 skinny jeans virtual food is just about all I should be eating at the moment!!

hope everyone have a great weekend - I have an ice hockey fest this weekend, watching nottingham panthers tomorrow and my hubby falling over on the ice sunday playing hockey himself 9not that i go there to laugh at his misfortunes you understand)

oooooohh Curly please be my ov buddy! I'm due on Tuesday - can never count the days properly - is that 4? - but will keep fx for you. Let me know how you get on. Desperate to find out. oooooooh

Lou fantastic news have everything crossed for you over here ...

Diege hoping the chunderbus is going well in the best possible way

Hello Mitzimaybe poor you the fall out from a miscarriage is awful I think other people who have been through the same thing really help but its very very personal hope you will stay.

can't stop have a list of friday jobs a mile long and have wasted half the day on Ihavenoideawhat so must try and cover this up quickly before they all get home

oh and Curly maybe the camera had run out of film or bytes or whatever "ever the optimist!"

Lol please don t worry its fine. No photos this time she also said she couldn t date me yet as if i m bothered about dates!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Isaboo thanks X
Hippy know where you re coming from as i say theses ashes aren t my Georgie X

Of course I'll be your ov buddy Lol, but you've confused me a little (quite easy to do most days). Am I right in saying af is due on Tuesday? If so and unfortunately af does arrives, cd1 (cycle day 1)as the first day of red blood....hope that makes sense. To be honest I don't think it's happened for me this month though.

Lou sorry I hadn't acknowledged your post earlier. I'm rather touched by your story and words fail me. If I knew you in rl I would just give you the biggest hug and would have tears in my eyes. I think Georgie would be proud of her Mummmy and Daddy. Here's a virtual hug {{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}

Oh buggery I managed to miss an entire page before my last posting useless Lou I am still happy...selfishly about the scan but can't imagine the emotional roller coaster you are both on at the moment it can never be a good day to bring your child's ashes home sorry

also Deige posted thinking drugs working ...sorry sorry no more vomit jokes I promise for the next 35 some weeks .....will order some good morning sickness food in sympathy when the Bistro opens

right
I fancy thai... can I have some red prawn curry pls. And then some mango and coconut ice cream exactly like wot they serve in Wagamamas.

What I need to know tonight is... whilst I have had 2 consecutive nights out this week (unheard of!) I still did dinner, bath, bedtime, running out late both nights at about 7.40, and came home both nights to an untouched departure scene (not all washing up done/tidying etc etc). DP has a night out tonight (well deserved to be fair)and he slopes off at 6.30 having done sweet FA. ...

Anyway better crack on with my chores whilst Diege chops the lemongrass and deseeds the chillis...

Wave to all. xx

Right, that's a large glass of red while I check the menu. I'm thinking it's late, but I can still manage a broad bean and asparagus risotto.

Right, af due on Tue, Curly so I'm going to take this seriously and chart from CD1. And pray that this is academic because af decides not to visit. Tina's version sounds better than a ovarian cysts. Hoping it's not just gripey af pains that last days before the real thing. I'll be pretty cheesed orrff. Just watched The Fight at the local cinema - great film but had to bury my head in dps armpit every time someone was hit. I'm getting too soft in my old age.

Can I have what jolls is having, please. Not to late am I?

Mitzimaybe welcome, so sorry you had this sad experience but so happy you are now with someone who cares for you and is not the wrong person like the one you were with for ages.

Louise Big hugs.

Love to all.

Enjoying/sadly watching Comic relief red nose day. Tragic, just so tragic, what a weird combination, comedy and tragedy.

I'm not an Eastenders fan but the Witney storyline was really tragic.

jolls I find that when DH has one of his rare nights out the whole house goes into chaoes just before he leaves and yet when I go out I just do all the necessary and slip out the door with a bit of last minute slap on my face

Didn't bother with the Bistro last night. To be honest I was well put off by the chef vomitting all night - sorry diege I know it's crap but it is a good sign for you, so I am allowing myself to make jokes still (tell me if that's wrong!)

I had a big worry this morning. DS1 had what looked like a weird rash on his face (like little red grazes). I tried the lick your finger method ("get off mum") and it was still there. Called DH and said I think he has a rash, DH pointed out that he still had red spray in his hair from yesterday (crap mum sent them to bed with it still in). So we got the flannel out and YES it was just red dye. See jolls I can be a hypocondriach by proxy too

lou thinking of you today. I do think it's a good idea to make the paper-weight as it will be a reminder of your darling girl but I agree that she will never be far from your thoughts anyway.

italian You made it to the FRIDAY night bistro - but only just - you little minx

I had my friend over yesterdy with her 6 month old. He was born a few days after the due date of our MMC. It was weird holding him and thinking that if that foetus hadn't stopped at 8 weeks this is what we would have had by now. But to be honest, that all seems like a long time ago and I wasn't upset at all. I did enjoy holding him though - he is a great big chunk of a boy just like our boys were/are .

Sun is shining here - hope you all have a good day. I am planning to emulsion the downstairs loo later - who is of that????