Freak out room for those newly updiffed after MC to hold hands and support each other...

[DachshundsWantPuppies]

Hello!

Newly updiffed and freaking out about spotting, cramping, the wait until your first scan and each little twinge? Settle in for lots of hand holding and supprt until you're ready to move to grads

Oh Dachs big, big hug to you, isn't it all horrible?! It is so unfair on us who have had trouble conceiving/holding on to little beans. So, very unfair.

I am actually feeling majorly stressed - so much so that I'm going to book tomorrow off to relax :(

Ooh big hugs Dachs xxx I have felt (and continue to feel) exactly the same repeatedly!! My symptoms keep coming ang going. Boobs have remained much less sore than they are usually pre-AF and haven't grown at all. Nausea really comes and goes (I'm talking goes for a week, returns for a few days/half a day and disappears again - it's absent much more than it's present). It doesn't stop me freaking out, but logically it should be some comfort that in two of the weeks when I've had no symptoms at all I've had (i) a blood test that showed HCG levels higher than av for triplets; and (ii) a scan showing bean with HB. I know you're not going to be reassured until you've got your own results but I hope this helps maybe a little to show you're not alone in the varying symptoms and it's not necessarily a bad sign xxx

Big hugs for you too Hairy xxx

thanks hairy

I hope the day off helps you relax! :) Anything exciting planned?

thanks wombie - I'm just really really not connecting with this pg at all because it doesn't feel real. The next week and a half is really going to drag :(

I'm hoping that after I've seen a bean it will all be fine and I'll get excited. Assuming there's a bean (which I'm quite disheartened about at the moment but if the hcg reading goes up I guess i should stop worrying, for now at least!)

You all really should charge for advice - what would I do without Mumsnet to keep me sane!? Amazing news on the twins Tigger (and am jealous!) and Dachsund hope everything's ok at the doc - I have very few symptoms too and I know the worry it causes.

hairy omg you could have been writing about my life....

dachs huge hugs. I felt similar then the bloods came back higher and they don't lie... Fingers crossed they will be lovely and high.

I told my best mate from uni about the BFP yesterday-she had a MMC at the start of last year and is about 21 weeks now. She's decided that it's now ok to tell me all about the massive kicks that she's feeling and how exciting and enjoyable it is now blah blah blah. Problem is it doesn't uplift me, it make me want to run to the toilets and sob my heart out. For all the positive thinking it feels impossible to get that far and have the reassurance of feeling something move :( I wish she wouldn't share with me-really can't think about other people's happy pregnancies right now. I know that sounds mad because as far as I know I'm happily differd too.

Btw I've found eating jelly is helpful for sickness..... Collleagues must be moments away from sussing me-don't think jelly for lunch has ever done the job for me before....

Hello, can I join you please ladies?

Had a mmc in early December, now 5+4. So want to be excited but cant get over theanxiety at the moment. Have done 2 first response tests, two cb digi, and 6 boots cheapies!!

Went to see GP and they wont give me an early scan - am considering paying for a private one just to put my mind at rest. I have no sickness, no sore boobs, no nothing apart from a little bit of lightheadedness and an incredibly sore back.

Keeping everything crossed for all of you that goes wellx

Pink I'm sitting at my desk eating a whole bowl of olives (from the salad bar in the staff canteen - they're meant to be a garnish ). No one's said anything - yet!

Welcome Silverangel sorry for your loss.

I had a suspected ectopic in June, MMC mid November, I'm 5+5 today, so we are at about the same stage. I am also in not-getting-excited mode - first scan on Friday and really pooping myself over the whole thing. I will be staring at the wall crying, I think.

Can't believe they wont' give you an early scan after having an MMC :(

I have a little bit of sore nipsness, and am feeling mildly sick around mealtimes (also ravenously hungry 2-3 hours after eating ), I also have lightheadedness, but I want proper full on symptoms to make me feel better :(

So sorry we are all feeling teary. I have just sent an email to two colleagues saying 'I'm not feeling too good today so am going to leave early and will be on holiday tomorrow' and to my HR lady saying that Im having a bad day thinking about what happened to me in Nov, and can't say it out loud (hence the email) as I will burst into tears if I do.

Gah. :(

Keeping everything crossed for all of us.

Extra big hug for Dachs.

I keep telling myself

"You have been updiffed three times in 9 months and you are forty two (ie: you are amazing!)
There is nothing to say thins won't go right this time, just because it did last time.
Don't worry about what hasn't happened yet"

But it's hard!

Dachs I've said this before but will repeat it in the hope it's helpful - I had pretty much no symptoms at all when I was where you are now - I've never had the tiredness and the sickiness didn't start until about week 7/8. I was never emotional either and my boobs have not done anything spectacular (damnit). The only symptom I had was belching. Seriously. I hope the blood test reassures you - I completely understand what you mean about not connecting with the pregnancy just yet. I think I'm only just starting to do that now.

Hairy that's a cracking list of symptoms the knickers one made me laugh out loud.

Silver welcome & nice work on the big heap of tests

Pink jelly is lush, that and creme caramel puddings.

good luck for your scan hairyfairylights, easy to say but try not to get too stressed. I'm going to push my mw when I go for my booking in appt to see if I can get an warly scan - need it for my sanity:)

Should have mentioned the only other symptom I have is being RAVENOUSLY hungry!!

I went to the toilets for a big cry. People are looking at me even weirder now.

Am just so pissed off with her-how can she have forgotten how scary it is to be at this stage?

owl Thanks for the reassurance but I think until I see a scan with a heartbeat I'm going to carry on freaking out! (Although I have no idea why because I know it's all a load of rubbush anyway and every pregnancy is different.) I had sore boobs with the MMC and that one didn't work out, so even if I did have them then I'd still be paranoid.

Hey ladies - I've got a fab idea for a great money making scheme - all we need to do is invent a time machine that enables pregnant women to fast forward a couple of months to get to the first scan. We'd make a fortune!

Unfortunately my addled old tax accountant brain wouldn't have been able to do it when I was studying astrophysics, let alone now, so i'm going to have to leave one of you to put the machine together and then just take credit for the idea! :)

wombie I know pg women get cravings but that one is seriously weird. (I can't stand olives, I was much more with you on the salt n vinegar crisps)

silver welcome and good luck with everything :)

pink People really should think a bit more, shouldn't they! You'll get there soon enough - you've already seen a nice healthy bean with a heartbeat, which is a good start :)

Dachs , Owl is right lovely; I have been reading(books, NOT GOOGLE) around the subject and they all concur with our wise owl that morning sickness wouldn't kick in until about week 8 for the average gal. Good luck with the tests.

Hairy I feel bad now, you do know I was laughing with you honey, don't you? I'm sorry you are teary and having a shit day. Things will hopefully seem brighter tomorrow and a day off for some R&R is probably just what you need, big hugs lovely

pink perhaps you could tell your friend that you are a little bit on edge and until you reach 12 weeks you'd rather keep baby talk to a minimum...for fear of tempting fate. She's your best mate, she's excited and means well hon and I'm sure would totally understand your hesitation about getting too excited and drawn into those type of conversations.

Hi Silver (lovely name btw), that sucks, it does vary from area to area, I seem to be one of the lucky ones. Private scans are about £70 and I wouldn't book one before 7 weeks as they may see so little you'll end up paying for another a week later for reassurance.

waves to pippa and wombat

Sorry full rant alert but still raging. Seriously, if things were the other way around, I can't believe I would be sending her texts saying how amazing and reassuring it is feeling your baby kick from 18 weeks blah blah. I really don't care what its like for her-I want my bean to be ok and I won't know whether thats the case for months and months yet :( rahahshshs WTF is wrong with me?????? I might well end up in her position in a few months, why am I so convinced I won't???

That sounds like a good idea, Pink - just tell her. She's probably thinking it would be encouraging and cheering for you and means it with good intentions.

Dachs I would have given my life-savings for a crystal ball :) BUT - I can tell you that this horrible constant paranoia and mentalling does end. Because I am not stressing any more. If, god forbid, there was the slightest sign something was going wrong then I'd be instantly stressing again but post-12 week scan and nuchal fold/bloods etc it really, honestly, does get better. And you lot are all getting one day closer to 12 weeks with every day that passes :)

See, I've got my pom poms out now

Mmmm your friend probably thinks she is giving you hope that once you have got past the scary stage you will have the exciting & reassuring bit to follow, she also probably thinks that cos you have told her, you are ok about talking about pg now... maybe she thinks that its ok to get excited... cos although she may still be worried about upsetting you she is having a baby and had a loss so really is probably incredibly excited about it and wanting to share some of that excitement with her chum?

I hid my excitement from my friend when she was mc'ing whilst i was pg, and i felt very guilty...but as soon as she was pg again it was excitement...right lets chat about things - maybe shes so caught up in her excitement its made her be a little tactless?

pink you are diffed, its all going right, where has the positive poisson gone?! It will happen lovely - stay positive

dachs my symptoms come and go too...its normal xx

hairy PMSL at the knickers

Thanks everyone, you are all lovely. She knows I only told her now cos she was asking if I'm going to a reunion dinner in March and the answer is yes if the bean is ok, and hell no if it hasn't made it. I'm just gonna give her a wide berth for at least another fortnight. I don't know what's wrong with me today-I've become totally taken over by a fear that its all going to go wrong...... Urgh early night for me tonight I think!!!

Pink this room isn't exempt from the haddock you know!! Where the hell has your Zen gone... c'mon pal, grab my hand and repeat after me, ''it will be ok, it will be ok, it will! And if I keep stressing like this, it'll do my bean noooooooo good'' Chin up babe, big hugs xx

Hi all. Can I join you ladies? I'm a whisper away from 40 and if this works, will be my first (and probably only) child. I had a MMC and a MC in 2009, and then a year of TTC again through 2010 (which was dreadful). 2011 and I am now 7 weeks (as of tomorrow). I was given an early scan at 6 weeks and we saw a heartbeat - I got such a shock because I was fully expecting it to have failed that I cried so hard the sonographer had to stop. We've been promised another scan at 9 weeks. But within a day of feeling reassured I began worrying again (with my MMC the baby died at 6 weeks but I only started bleeding at 10 weeks.. so my thinking is, 'so what that I saw a heartbeat at 6 weeks'). No real symptoms - boobs a bit bigger but that's it (and they seem less big than a couple weeks ago). I'm now paying for a private scan next week Tues to try get me to the 9 week scan in one piece. I am maybe getting 3 hours a sleep at night, such is my worry. And bizarrely - or maybe not - my DH is in a worse state than I am. So, there's no way I am a graduate yet ... and no way I can even dare to think I ever will be at this stage.

Chill out FFS lovely, ZEN is good for the bean raging is NOT!

mama of course I do! [silly]

hug for you pink.

I've deliberately not told my friend the hr person as she will so put her foot in it. Last time she kept telling me " ooh imagine the staffs faces when announce it at a staff meeting at twelve weeks" etc and I just kept saying "if I make it that far" and "I won't be making an announcement at any staff meeting"

I am at home in bed and have booked thu and fri off. Lots of rest for me.