Just MC and ready to try again? Pack your cake wine and tightie whities and join us for more ranting weeping and most of all laughing! All welcome! (Part 10)

[youremindmeofthebaubles]

Had a miscarriage and ready to try again? This is the place for you, support in the form of virtual wine, chocolate and a great big shoulder to cry on (tears not essential). The new year beckons us, lots of BFP's for everyone

UCL= Usual cycle Length
CD= cycle day

oh ladies what a lot of worry.

Orange, Wombat I hope so much that everything works out for you both.

I've managed to get an appointment for Wednesday with consultant so hopefully can get meds sorted then.

Gah have work to do - need to stop MN-ing and get on with it.

(((((Un-MNetty-Hugs))))) to all.

mummya just a quickie but are you sure cd13 isn't too late in cycle for HSG? I need one next month but they told me it needs to be between day 7 and 10, 48 hours after no bleeding and no sex after cd1 (as if DH would be keen for that!! Boak! ) i guess it might vary from hospital to hospital though. also think you're good to swi straight after as soon as you're ready so hopefully not a write off.

orange sorry it's all so stressful, fingers crossed tis all ok!!

dachs really good Yo hear more follicles! That is great news!

knitter sorry you're not feeling great, hope to see you with a bfp soon

mamamp hoping for a bfp before your due date hun xx

Sorry for no more shout outs, only skimmed thread xx

Hello everyone and big hugs to orange and wombat...what a rollercoaster this all is...am willing everything to be OK for you both.

Gah MummyA what a terrible frustration . Is there any way round it?

Just to add to the general worry, I'm not feeling all that great and am a bit concerned there might be some aspects of the MC lingering...have a hospital appointment on Thursday and was hoping not to have to go back in but think I probably should now :(

Ladies with BFPS don't go anywhere...you give me hope!

Orange thinking lots of positive thoughts for you, remember some women do bleed and have a healthy baby, it does happen, why couldn't it happen to you?

Not a lot of excitment going on here, tried to jolly myself up by telling another corner of mn that I hide in but doesn't really feel real. Bumped into one of the midwives who I saw with dd today znd had a quick word, she rang the other one that covered me and booked me straight into see her on thu. Haven't been to the docs, partly cause I was worried it would temp fate but also I guess I was expecting to be told off for it being so soon after the last one.

Mw1 said I need to tell mw2 about everything that happened around the time of mc. I do really like my mw and totally trust her, I know her surgery was full but she's going to see me anyway.

Just can't seem to get to the level of happiness that I think I should be at. Of course I am pleased very pleased, I thought I might never go through with getting of for the secong time cause I didn't know how it works with two. But I was ready. I keep thinking about my dad.

I don't know how to work out my dates with no period but I'm going to be due in sep aren't I?, thatS when my dads birthday is. Still haven't told mum and had said that when I was pg that I would tell her abouv last time but I'm not sure I can. Sorry for going on. Just don't have anyone to talk too.

Lots of positive vibes to you all x

Love...you havent had much time to grieve for your mc, or your dad... your head must be about ready to explode. On top of all that emotional stuff, its wonderful and terrifying getting a bfp after an MC. Sounds like you just need to talk about it.

You also sound like you need to get in for an early scan.. mousebacon/caribou conceived in their WTF cycles after EPRC they would probably be good to talk to. The only way without a period i think they can date you, is through a scan. (although could be wrong!)

((hugs))

Hiya

I'm totally absent around here lately. Have been trying not to think too much about TTC.
SWI in full progress

Must read what's going on with you all ( hopefully only positive) and will catch up in next few days.

Niteynite everyone!!

Hello all just popped in for mememe. Need a hug. Zen has evaporated. This evening have cried so hard I want to throw up. I can't believe how shit this year of ttc has been and I don't know where I'm going to find the energy from to keep trying month after month:( how am i going to keep going if it takes several more years?? every month more of my friends get pregnant with no drama-WTF is wrong with me??? I'm 28, I don't smoke, I don't drink, I don't take drugs, I eat healthily and take my vitamins. According to SIL I should "think of happy times" and apparently she knows how I feel because she can't be arsed to go to work any more and has been ttc for a month..... Right.

I know I'm being ridiculous but I am so bored of being in this pit of despair. Everytime I think I've turned a corner and have finally managed to leave it behind it hits me in the stomach again and I turn into a big wailing mess :(

Urgh anyway I'm knakered which doesn't help so will do a bit of positive thinking (not sure it works if you think it's pointles though....) and get some sleep. Hopefully it will all seem better in the morning....

Sorry again for whingy post, just need to vent somewhere.... Xxxx

Pink you rant away! I've had two mega rants so far in the last couple of weeks, just before new year and this last weekend too. The first few months after a mc you think positive, like it will happen again quickly. When it doesn't the depth of despair takes over quite fast.
There's no sense or fairness in it, but for some of your friends you may not know for sure that they haven't had any drama or wait with the ttc game. Think of happy times is crap advice. You can not magic a baby by reminiscing about last years holidays!!!
I sincerely hope it won't take too much longer for you. How long did it take to conceive before the MC?
Nowt wrong with venting! we are all here to listen to it.
There's nothing wrong with you. And most likely you will get your baby one day too. How long have you been trying?

Hey Kat only took a couple of months first time, been trying properly for 5 months this time, its been 6 months since MC. I know that's not meant to be long statistically but it feels like fooorrrrrever. I'm also aware that so much worse happens to other people so am aware that it might seem insensitive but can't help feeling sorry for myself.... I think you're on your fifth month too right? (((hugs))) for you too. This is truly shit.

Oooh just realised that it's 6 months to the day since MC started, that's slightly reassuring as I swear I forget the date but have a random meltdown on the 10th or 11th of each month.....

Thanks nice lady xxxx

Velvet I'm an engineer by training and did heaps of physics and loved it (due to having a wonderful teacher at school!) but can't remember any of it now but my DSis-in-law is at Oxford studying it and is aiming to work at CERN and my DH is just a freak and remembers everything he has ever studied - he grilled his DSis's new boyfriend once by making him work out whether it was more cost effective to make ice in an ice maker or to drive down to the shop to buy a bag, which somehow involved them all rattling on about thermodynamics!!!! I do not envy the future boyfriends of our girls!!!!! Good luck with it ...

Sending CEP calming vibes - try not to put too much pressure on yourself. Bloody hard I know. We all worry

Pink here is a mega-water pistol to point in the direction of your S-in-law. I hate false empathy. Hopefully it is an anniversary blip - you have most definitely been in a good place more often than a bad one in recent posts so maybe it is more of a tanker turning of a corner rather than a sportscar turn ( full of rubbish metaphors I am)! 5 months does feel like forever - it only took me a couple of months for my first two but the last one took 6 months and I was going bonkers. Keep chatting to your lovely MIL, chanting your chants even if they feel stupid and here's hoping you wake up and the millstone has been lifted.

MummyA can't you just have a complete meltdown and get them to see you a couple of days earlier so you are still in there with a shag window this month - how is your chart looking and TMI your pant snot (I have been on here too long - don't even feel embarrassed any more asking someone that)

Orange I so want it to be all ok for you. Big hugs. How are you feeling this morning?

I am off to Oz today. Too excited to sleep. I get to see my Mum (and the rest of my far too large, mad family!) I have been desperate for a hug from my Mum since the mmc and I just can't wait to see her ....

Thanks nikster I do feel like I'm going to explode. Dd is going through a bad time at nighttime as well (both going to sllep and staying that way) so can't be helping. Just had so much over the last couple of years but honestly the last 6 months have about finished me off (my nan passed away also) feel like I'm losing my friends and my marbles. Mn is the only place I can really let it out how sad is that!

Water pistol!!! Awesome idea aandr!! maybe I'll fill it with some of the water from the fishtank we have here seeing as it hadn't been cleaned for a while mwah ha ha. Hehe love the tanker metaphor btw I did engineering af uni too!!!! You are gonna be knackred today-4am!!!! Have an AMAZING holiday and get heaps of hugs from your mum. Am hoping for an Aussie bean for you :)

love you poor thing, it's very tough losing a parent and a grandparent, and going through the headf**k that i would imagine being pg after mc is at the same time will put you under lots of pressure. My only advice would be not to suppress your grief-I did when my dad died and then I think lots of it came out during several major meltdowns after MC. does your gp practice do counselling? Even if not I'd really recommend talking to your gp-you're understandably under a heap of pressure at the moment so they will be sympathetic I'm sure. And they won't be cross with you!!! (hugs)))

Sorry for rant,am feeling much better today. 15 hour day yest and am knackered-things always seem much worse when I'm tired and have had a shite day.... Recommencing Plan Positivity..... (and sending a great cheery fook off to SIL!!!!! If you're not gonna be nice, you can naff off is my new mantra!!!) hope you all have a lovely day! Xxxxx

Velvet my fx this is your month, I don't think 15dpo is too early to POAS
Cep I do hope things sort themselves soon, it's the unknown and the waiting that makes this unbearable isn't it?
Pink glad to hear you're feeling better today, sometimes it helps to have a good cry and a vent. Good new mantra too!
Daddysgirl what a terrible time to be going through. That's what we're here for, though
Hadrian if you have any doubt you should go back in, then at least you know and can start trying to move forward
AandR whoop for Oz!!

Thanks for everyone's positive vibes, it really helps. I now have a list I make myself read to try and keep my spirits up, though my mood us directly related to how much blood I have when I go the loo. I feel really cranky and sick, which I suppose on it's own would be a good sign, but it's just making me feel worse. Oh well, back to crappy tv!

Morning all, just a quickie because I've got to go to work but just wanted to reply to some of you who sound like you need a ((((hug))))...

mummya that's so frustrating!!! You must feel like you're banging your head against a brick wall right now. Check and double check the timings. Is it worth ringing round any more people to see if you can get in anywhere else quicker or does it have to be that day? Really hope you manage to sort it out; but if not, then deep breaths and go with it - if you can't ttc this cycle then you can't change that by stressing and there's just as much chance next cycle. If you can I would still throw in a couple of sneaky shags after the tests etc; ds was conceived on day 24 of a 28 day cycle so it's worth a shot! Thinking of you chica x

daddysgirl wow you have had such a lot to deal with there's no wonder you feel like you're about to explode!! I second the others: can you look into counselling? No normal person can deal with that much emotional turmoil thrown at them without some help, please look into it. And in the meantime rant here as much as you like!

(((( pink )))) hang on in there, I know it's tough. Take a break from seeing the sil if she's doing your head in, no point adding to the stress. I was 8-9 months each time conceiving ds and dd, and we were not being careful for almost 3 years before I got pg again (I won't say we were trying because we has given up!) then still didn't end up with dc3. So I know it won't happen easily for me, but every month there's still a chance and still some hope and that keeps me going iykwim. There's a few of us here that have been here a while and it is hard, but we can help each other through x

Right got to go but aandr . Safe trip xx

Hey velvet I just scrolled back up and saw you're teaching yourself physics!! Good for you, you complete mentallist!! . I reckon...... If you POAS it will be a BFP because that is classic sods law while you're trying to get your head round your exam on Wed!! But of course will be a brilliant distraction though!! I might not be back here for a couple of days if work atays like yesterday so really good luck for your exam on Wednesday and a big wave to everyone else. I've put some flapjack on the side which apparently will make you all preggers according to my Chinese medicine fertility book because it's got dates and oats to nourish your Qi and some other stuff that seems blatantly unhealthy like butter but is apparently fabulously good for you! Anyway don't ask questions, it will be worth getting fat if it gets us all a BFP!!! Xxx

pink I've eaten porridge oats every day for my breakfast for the last month, will this be my month! sorry to hear you're a bit down, hope you can ride the feelings and feel better soon, as aandr says, you have been much happier on balance recently, so don't forget how well you're doing!

I am happy today. And yesterday. God only knows why, am 9 dpo today (I think)

izz I was like that after ds, haven't used contraception for around 2 years before the MC and then 6 months so far this side. How are you, my love?

Velvet I reccomend not temping after ov, I think it's chilled me out a bit this month, Que sera, sera. Whens 15 DPO? monday? I don't know if i can wait that long! how long is your LP? mine was 11 days last month.

ladybee a whoop for seeing the consultant on Weds, Hurrah!

mummya How you doing?

waves and hugs to everyone else, got a manic day at work, so perhaps no time for further catch up!

So sorry to hear so many people feeling grotty and down. I reckon today everyone should treat themselves to something lovely cos you lot are ace & deserve nice things.

Pink message me your email addres via messageing here or on FB. I am going to forward you an email from one of the leading fertility specialists in the country regarding my situation! Essentially my love, me and you have freakily been on the same journey, conceived within 3 months of starting to ttc, and got pg in same week, lost our babies around the same time, dd for you Fri and me Mon, and now we are getting frustrated that efforts to ttc are not working!! He totally put my mind at rest and there is lots of positive and helpful info in it! Ignore the crap about a happy place! Pah!

Morning all

Forgot to say, Mummya did you have any news back about the scan? How frustrating, I hope you get things sorted soon

Daddysgirl sorry in my early morning fug I missed your post. I can't agree more with others on here on the need to talk all this out. What a huge wallop of shite to be dealing with all in one go. Even in my naive days of my first pregnancies I never had the pure joy of just being pregnant - it came with all sorts of worries generally relating to my work and losing my identity and not earning money - this time I know I will just panic from beginning to end about losing it and having to go through all this again. To add to that all the other things going on in your life, this is going to be hard and it is perfectly fine to feel conflicted. As long as you don't get stuck in the pit of despair - a good wallow, holler, howl, kick of the rubbish bins, comfort eating, duvet hiding, generally solid mope are all perfectly good for the soul every now and then (I indulge in them all!). I hate this American concept that you have to be happy and positive all the time!!!

Pink I agree with your mantra. When I was being coached at work we spoke quite a lot about removing toxic people from your life! Another twin Pink, does that make you Nix and MamaP triplets?

Fingers crossed everyone that Brisbane airport remains open long enough to let us land.

hi all, Thanks velvet aandr and orange. i guess like so many others on here it had taken so much longer getting pg this time than with ds (2 months with ds and nearly 12 months this time.) only for me to lose it. i've only got till sept to fall and if it takes nearly a year again, then i'll run out of time. I do need to start thinking a bit more positive about it all though, it could be quicker this time round right???

aandr love the dsis's boyfriend test. have a fab time in oz, how long are you there for??

pink i hope you're feeling better today.

love oh hon you are dealing with so much all at once. As others have said i hope you're able to get some counselling to help, we're all here to talk to about whatever you need to.

what an odd day i made it into work (still feeling rather ill) my second week back, to find an e-mail saying that someone i had gone through training with a few years back had died of cancer at the weekend. Then got a call from the nursery saying ds had a temp of 102 so am now home again.

Cep there is every chance it could happen straight away, but it must be so tough to keep positive. I'm terrified I've left it too late, I'll be 33 next month and ttc #1. What a strange day, I hope your ds is ok?