To scale christmas WAY back?

[OhMyGodSusan]

I have ds15 and ds10. Ds10 birthday is next month so added expense. Brought his presents for that just 3 things as I never go mad on birthdays but all things he likes/wants.

Im struggling with christmas this year with the cost of living. Usually I manage to save £150ish a month leading up to it havent done that this year.

Ive got 3 Xmas presents for ds10.. 10 manga books, pokemon cards and monopoly.

Would it be bad to put a limit at 5 or 6 presents each? And then take them for a overnight London trip in spring for christmas as there joint present?

They aren't massively into things other than computer games and I'm thinking it would be better to do some experiences with them. Anyone else done this?

I think that sounds a great idea. I’d discuss with them now though so they can get used to it and get into the idea.

I’m thinking of doing similar and trying to make it more about the spirit of it rather than the stuff. Especially when there’s not a lot they want. We do homemade gifts for adults now like chutney, sloe gin etc too which helps.

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that not saying it’s his birthday soon so an added expense does that mean he’d get more if his birthday was earlier in the year? Is the train, hotel part of their present?

Also trying to scale back this year!

I think experiences are the best thing to have, a trip to London is what they will remember in years to come rather than a pile of presents :)

No i never go mad for their birthdays its always one big present or a couple of small things and then restaurant/takeaway of their choice with one or two of their friends.

No just the trip to London. Thinking of taking them to the national history museum and then a show of their choice on the night. Wouldn't say hotel and train is part of it.

Ive already asked the oldest and he loved the idea but youngest was a bit iffy. I want to teach them that Christmas isn't about money and presents especially now they are older. Will get the things on their list which is literally 5-6 things each but I dont want to fill the presents out for the sheer sake of it like I usually do when it could go on something they'd really enjoy!

I was thinking about this exact issue last night - everything is SO expensive now and I'd have to spend twice my previous (modest) budget to get the same amount of stuff this year.

Maybe doing lovely things together (whether it costs money or not) is a better option than spending money on "stuff", especially once they know about Father Christmas...

That all sounds great then. Sounds like you’ve really thought about how to make it nice for them

A trip to London sounds great but it could potentially cost the same, or even more, than present buying! Depending on how you travel and where you stay you could be looking at hundreds for a train, hotel and show tickets. Not to mention snacks/meals etc on top.

Sounds fine in theory , but realistically as PP has mentioned could get really expensive, especially if they have a particular show in mind . I wouldn’t promise it unless you have costed it out and will definitely have saved enough , not forgetting you will have to pay for the tickets , accommodation in advance of when you go .

We don't live anywhere near a big city so I'm looking at more regional theatres etc for shows...and maybe stuff like ice-skating or one of the "house of illusions" type things followed by lunch somewhere they'd choose rather than me. Also matinee shows rather than evening ones, so you don't have to stay overnight...or if there's a late train coming back late could just add to the fun?

Yes would be around £1000 for London just costing it up for Edinburgh which we're a lot closer too thinking Edinburgh zoo and will compare the two. Could do Edinburgh in Feb half term then and then London in the summer. They would be happy with that as presents.

I went overboard last year due to dh serious illness and I'm still paying it off tbh. So this year we will definitely be cutting back. Also did two expensive experiences last Christmas. I'm hoping dcs won't be too disappointed. Eldest was just talking about how much they got last year which makes me feel bad. I'm thinking of surprising them with next year's summer holiday to try to make up for it. They'll get about 10 things each totalling about 200 each. Last year it was at least 500 each plus the experiences. We also have a complete lack of space which will make me stick to my guns.

Will be scaling back on gifts, food, drink this year for sure! We just cant justify spending such a big proportion of income on treats for a few days.

Another thought that if the holidays are their presents they might
a. Prefer somewhere different to that
b. Rather not go away and have the money or go somewhere cheaper and have more money

Yes, I've spent the day looking at other cities. So far London, Edinburgh, and York. Will ask them both if they prefer the money or to go away.
But regardless I am not buying tons of presents just for the sake of it. Will get the oldest some tracksuits he wants and some legos. And the youngest some legos. But im going to stand my ground on this one.

Lot of children will have less than yours. Much less. Of course it's fine to scale down.

I think it's fine to scale back....but I think the suggestion of a holiday at a later date as an alternative defeats the point as you are still spending money, potentially more and it doesn't sound like it's what they both want either.

Yep just wanted to post in solidarity that due to cost of living we just haven't been able to save the money for Christmas we usually do 😔

Normally I would have between £600 and £800 saved now which would cover the kids presents; this year it's more like £250.

I will still be able to add to that in my November and December paydays, but we normally do that anyway.

I am still stressed about it but equally, I'm going to enjoy the season and work hard to do more things with them to make it special.

My kids are now adults and their best memories of Christmas are of things we did rather than what they had.

Could they tell you what you bought them for Christmas last year? Do you remember many of the Christmas presents you received when you were a child? I think keeping the present pile to a sensible number is a good idea and it's what we do too.

Quite often we will do an experience or a day out rather than loads of physical stuff. Like others said, it's not necessarily a cheaper option as things can really add up but DDs still talk about going to Harry Potter Studios, or the time we went to Bath and I'd rather have those memories and time with them than more stuff in the house.

An experience gift is always a hit with our 10yr old granddaughter (and her parents). They are my go to christmas/birthday gifts. For her 10th her parents took her to a fun cake decorating experience in the metro center and we gifted tickets to Harry Potter drone show. Is there anything local coming up next year that would interest them? I've picked up loads of ideas from local social media groups. We are gifting a joint family gift to Harry Potter studios. It's a coach trip that includes hotel, evening meal, breakfast, travel and entrance. It worked out cheaper and easier this way (coming from Northumberland), with jan/Feb being quiter and cheaper. This was one I had spotted on social media by other families. Other family members are gifting dgd some spending money for the trip.

I’ve done this for my teen DC over the past couple of years. We go on holiday together 1:1 just me and them somewhere I know they’d appreciate and I get them a very small selection of gifts as a result. They haven’t complained whatsoever and have really enjoyed it.

I’ve also scaled back this Christmas. So many presents are entirely unappreciated and sometimes unused that each year I just feel really disappointed. I’m also scaling back on the food. I’ve decided we’ll get a take out on Christmas Eve for the first time because I’m tired of the effort I put into a buffet only to have half uneaten.

Nailed it

Also scaling back this year. We've never gone 'mad' but they actually don't need or want that much anyways. Mine are 20 (works full time so is earning decent money) and 13. As for adults I've scaled it right back. I have to. I can't justify spending loads of money on tatt. It's not needed. My MIL goes mad and its like Santas grotto in my house on Xmas day so I always feel the need to buy her loads of things too. But I can't take the stress of trying to keep up with her lol