Not looking forward to it

[Flowers1985]

I absolutely love christmas, and the lead up to it, its my favourite time of year, the only difference this year is I dont feel lile i can look forward to it because I'm struggling for money. My kids are 11, 13, 15. Have quite a big family to buy for as well. Im sure it will come together somewhere but I just feel like iv failed and its gonna be shite.

That’s a shame. I don’t spend much at Christmas but we all still have a great time. What do you normally do/buy that you won’t be able to this year?

Can you tell the wider family that you will be cutting back a bit this year?

Tell your family members now, rather than later, that you cannot afford to be buying for Adults, this year. Concentrate on your children, who are old enough, to understand not to be expecting too much, as things are a bit tight. Don't get into debt, just to cover a short period of time. It is more important to have a warm home, and food, in the cupboard.

I don't spend a lot myself, at Christmas time, and never feel like I am missing out on things. But it depends what things you like to do, I suppose.

Just be honest with everyone and prioritise your kids - but also be honest with them too.

Definitely this. Immediate family only.

Perhaps a few tokens to others but most people will be relieved not annoyed to be freed from exchanging stuff that no-one really wants and many cannot afford.

Prioritize your children and suggest to the wider family that this would be an ideal time to do a Secret Santa and set a budget for that one gift. It could well be that the family may be struggling themselves and have just have not revealed this to you.
If you get together as a family for Christmas Dinner then costs can be split or shared with someone providing a roasting joint or turkey, another the vegetables, pudding etc.

Prioritise your DC and tell the wider family now that you won’t be doing gifts for adults.

If you really want to give the adults token gifts then perhaps some edible homemade gifts? There is a thread running on this now in this forum, but be selective and choose things to make that have inexpensive ingredients. Or give a family group a box of chocolates and a card.

For your DC I’d be honest with them over what you can afford.

If there is young family members that you need or want to buy for start scouring the charity shops now for new/nearly new toys and books etc. The trick is to go regularly as possible as stock can change a lot, rather than going once or twice and thinking there is nothing here. People always recommend Vinted but the postage does add up.

Like others have said, prioritise your DC and try to get on the Christmas bargain thread, some really great deals come up on there and it can make a big difference. Also have a look at places like Vinted for bargains.
I know it’s stressful, but changing the way you shop can really help. You’re going to need to shop smart and be a bit more efficient with keeping an eye on deals, offers and dates.
Honestly, the Christmas thread is one of the friendliest threads and everyone is always willing to help if they spot a deal they think your DC might like. I don’t know if you have a daughter, but the P.Louise deal was brilliant. It’s a little harder with boys, but there have been a few good deals on Nintendo games if they have a console.
Amazon Prime day is on the 6th too, and Home Bargains, B&M and the supermarkets will all have some great bits coming in over the next few weeks.
Good luck Op. I’m on a tighter budget this year too, as my delightful neighbours set fire to their home and caused smoke damage to my lounge 🙈 So I’m dealing with that at the same time as trying to get Christmas shopping sorted.

You don't have to buy presents for everyone it's ridiculous cut back.

Suggest Secret Santa for the adults in the ‘big family’ and set a budget. This way you only buy 1 present but it’s a decent one.

Suggest Secret Santa for the kids in the ‘big family’ and set a budget. Each kid has fun shopping for one decent present for one of their cousins.

Or something along those lines. Get creative OP.

Then you can focus on buying for your own DC. They are at an awkward age, where everything seems small but costs a lot. Focus on a couple of nice things each, then bulk out with board games, books etc..

One year I knew I’d be taking my kids on certain day trips in the Feb half term and Easter holidays so I gave these experiences as Christmas gifts. for instance a theatre trip, white water rafting etc.. I had actually booked them but if you wanted to kick the payment-can down the road and book nearer the time then they’ll be none the wiser, you can still gift them at Christmas. Also, it means there’s no extra costs for those school holidays and you’ve maxed the Christmas gift giving.