My partner (35M) and I (31F) have been together for around 10 years. We’re both professionals and don’t have children. We love hosting friends, cooking, going out for nice dinners, and generally enjoy a fairly relaxed, grown-up lifestyle.
For the past couple of Christmases we’ve spent the day with close friends who are also child-free. It’s been very low-key and indulgent - champagne, oysters, great food, good wine and long conversations.
This year we’ve agreed to host my partner’s family. His parents have downsized and his siblings have had more children, so we’re now the only ones with a house big enough for everyone at Christmas.
I know it’s only July, but I’m already feeling a bit anxious. There will be four children (aged 5, 4, 3 and 1), and we’re the only child-free couple. His nieces and nephews are lovely, but they’re also quite full-on. Family gatherings tend to involve a lot of shouting, squabbling and general chaos, and we usually come home feeling pretty overwhelmed.
I’m genuinely not trying to sound judgemental or anti-children - it’s just very different from the Christmases we’ve come to know and love.
Has anyone been in a similar position? I’d really like to keep some of the elements we enjoy (beautiful food, nice wine, a bit of a luxury feel) while still making it fun and welcoming for a family with young children. Any tips on striking that balance without coming across as a complete snob?