Need to rant? Come on over.

[DontlikeChristmas]

I’ll start. We’ve just opened presents. I couldn’t give a fig about presents for myself, but I think if you’re going to spend money on a gift for someone you’d may as well make sure it’s something they will like/use. DH has panic bought me a horrible tie dye jumper two sizes too big. I’ve never worn tie dye in my life. My mother has inexplicably bought me a truly awful outfit clearly meant for a teenager (I’m 50) in a colour I never wear, also in the wrong size. DH has also managed to buy DC a load of stuff they already have because he couldn’t be bothered to check. I feel so deflated by this & think it’s all such a massive waste of money (we probably could have gone out for dinner with the cost of the presents no one is going to wear/use, or made a charity donation).

We now have DHs family coming for dinner, who are lovely people but seem to have ever changing dietary requirements (none of which are due to diagnosed conditions) that it’s impossible to keep up with, so I’ve got to make about 15 different gluten-free/oil free/non-acidic/anti-inflammatory and whatever else dishes (DH ‘doesn’t do cooking’).

I’m over Christmas & it’s not even 8.30. Anyone else?

Oh - and to add insult to injury - my birthday is in December, so I am used to that being forgotten about too as everyone else is too busy/skint/forgot/too close to Christmas (despite it being at the start of the month) & this year was my 40th. I did get some lovely thoughtful gifts from friends, which was a bonus though.

I'll be glad to see the back of 2025

I don't get people toiletries for this reason surely it's a personal present, best to gift a boots voucher . It's like the universal standard kosher gift

Decided what to get the kids, paid for it all myself, went out and got them, wrapped them all. Laid them out myself. Spent a fortune on a new phone for 'D'H, he opened it, complained and moaned shoved it back in the bag and hasn't looked at it since. Cost me nearly £900 and I saved hard for it. He's had a face like thunder all day, snapped at me and the kids all day. I paid for and wrapped every single gift everyone received without an ounce of help from him financial or otherwise workout a stick of help from him. He took all the praise and credit for it.
I am sick of him. He's ungrateful, entitled and a total twat.

I love this reply!

Yes! My mum would rather handwash than use the dishwasher because "it isn't nice to use that, is it?"
For who???

Solidarity with you all having crap Christmases. Mine started yesterday, when I had it made very painfully obvious to me that I mean less to a certain member of my family, who I've known all their life, than their sibling's boyfriend who they've known for a couple of months.

I knew my siblings were arseholes, but I stupidly expected better of their children. I was so upset that I couldn't get to sleep until gone 2am this morning, so I feel absolutely crap today.

In NZ I hate Christmas and so I take myself off to a campsite to avoid everythind and usually people don’t turn up until Boxing Day.

This year a huge group of people turned up with a zillion kids all running around and screaming until past midnight and then at 6am in the morning.

At 1 pm they completely commandeered the cooking space and the rec room so there was nowhere for anyone else to sit. They won’t take there kids offsite to run around on the huge beach about a 5 min walk away.

There is only one person actually parenting, and she is completely overwhelmed and none of the other parents/grown ups are intervening at all.

It’s been an absolute nightmare.

I have a friend who always buys lovely gifts and I always put a lot of effort into finding nice gifts for her and her husband.

This year’s gift from her was a joint one between me and my husband, a bottle of Prosecco and a box of Quality Street.

She’s known me pretty much all of my life and knows I don’t like wine and rarely drink anyway, and the same goes for my husband, so not sure why she thought that was a suitable gift which we’d enjoy.

We are at my sisters. DH is pretending to look after the kids which means getting out of everything. Not helping. Not joining in. Ignoring PIL. Ignoring me. Not doing games/presents. Barely saying a word to anyone. My mum keeps sayinh "poor DH looking after the kids all the time".

He is hidden at top of the house with kids on iPads and him on his phone. Evrry 5 mins hes like "kids could do with some tiem out" and he just wants to leave the whole family. Kids fell asleep at 7.30pm last night and DH didn't come back down again. Cue mother saying how dedicated he is to the kids. He just was on tiktok in his room all evening.

I’ve got a stinking cold, managed to cook Christmas dinner for everyone but really just need to go to bed now. I wish they would just fuck off so I could crawl into bed, but unfortunately I’m the designated driver so have to drive them all home first and they’re showing no sign of wanting to leave yet…

Bloody hell, some of these comments make me so grateful for my partner. My kids are with Dad this year, so it's just me my partner and his son. He purchased and wrapped all the gifts for his son, (I gave him money towards it all as my gift). He went to sainsburys Tuesday and got all the food for dinner, and cooked it today. He asked what I wanted, a spot cleaner and I had that today. What is wrong with some of these men???

A family member got my DD13 £200 worth of M&S clothes and half of them she told me aren't her style. I also got some skin care from M&S and I'm really sensitive to most skin care. We're taking it back for a gift receipt however people pleaser here and I feel so bad. We thanked said family member over video today but I didn't say anything about not liking the gifts.

Single mum to twins who are 4.
They’ve been manically hyped up for days, yet still don’t seem to get the whole “Santa will be coming soon…” narrative enough to be a little more tame.

They see their Dad once a fortnight (his choice) so today at 8.30am we FaceTimed him (id been awake and dealing with utter mania since 5am)

He was still in bed, and I’m convinced clueless what day it was. DCs then said “thankyou for our presents!” (None of which were purchased by him) “can we come to your house today?!”

I know they’re only young, but I was up until 1am building their new toys and getting the house prepared to look like Santa had been! Their Dad won’t be seeing them until NYE and I’m exhausted.🥱

My eldest (adult) got into a fight last night and has spent the day feeling sorry for himself trying to doze on the sofa.

The twins have been wired, naturally. They’re young.

Boy has been hassling eldest constantly, which hasn’t gone down well.

The girl has been concerned, but was unwanted, so was needy for cuddles.

Then the homeless guy turned up, asking for food. It’s Christmas, so I gave him a good meal, but then he kept coming back because I’m a sucker.

I live alone, so it’s been a lot, but could be worse, I guess.

Oh, they’re all cats, by the way!

Actual rant now - someone is setting fireworks off close by and they’re so loud my windows are shaking and the cats are terrified.

I’m sorry so many of you have had an horrendous time. My heart goes out to you and I hope next year is so much better for you all.

My partner went out all day yesterday to the pub - came in, went straight to bed. Today he got up with us at 6.30, didn't engage with DC at all sat looking bored whilst they opened gifts & then made himself breakfast & left me to tidy everything. We went for dinner which was nice- went to visit his parents until he suddenly announced we were leaving - came home & lay on the couch. DC wanted to play games & he wouldnt join in & instead sat staring at his phone. Added to the fact DD has been unwell with a fever I am done. The kids never seem to be his priority - who refuses to join in with games on Christmas !?! This will be our last.

As always I bought all the gifts and food, planned it all. I do enjoy doing it so not really complaining.

I cooked our Christmas dinner and once we‘d eaten started to tidy up. Last year we had a huge row because DH sat on his arse while I cleaned up everything. It was awful, and something I’ve desperately tried to avoid this year. I’ve simplified our menu and used foil trays to ease the burden.

This year he helped me clear the table- then sat on his phone again. I asked him twice to wash the oven trays and he ignored me. I started to do them myself and reminded myself I don’t want to argue. Then remembered that I‘m a human being who deserves a nice Christmas too. So I asked him to get off his phone and help me.

He responded by asking why I was picking a fight, and that I don’t get what Christmas is about. He said I always want to argue at Christmas when it’s a time for peace and being with your family.

Without me, there would be no fucking Christmas in our house. He did apologise later and said he felt attacked when I told him to help. Then started again saying I just want to argue.

I‘d love to just give up and not bother next year, but I do it for the kids.

My DH got up late, made Christmas lunch while snapping at the kids, then went upstairs for a lie down. That was five hours ago.

My mum keeps saying it's fine because he made dinner, but I did literally everything else - bought and wrapped all gifts for the kids and the family, planned and purchased food and have entertained the kids all day.

I'm so embarrassed by his behaviour today, and now just want him to stay in bed because I can't face him and keep a pretence for the kids.

Not a massive rant, but MIL posted in family chat yesterday (think she'd been drinking and not realised it wasn't private) that she was just going to "get through" Christmas with my family today as she "just does as she's told and can't wait for it to be over". Sorry we cook for you every year and ensure you're included and not on your own. Feel free to go to your other child's house for the first time ever next year!

I’m wishing we were going home tomorrow, but we’ve another whole day to do (and then we have to stay until after lunch on the 27th, which means getting home in the dark).

It’s a lovely area and I’m getting some beach time, but more time inside the house being DiL polite and wishing I was at home in my own space.

it has been a nice day, but I’m just exhausted now and completely over visiting. I need my space!

I’m in pain and I hate it. My wrist feels like it’s being stabbed by a sharp object and that’s the Fibromyalgia, my ankle hurts and that’s the arthritis (waiting for an ankle replacement). My breast keeps cramping and that’s again is the Fibromyalgia, caused by the damage to lymph nodes when I had radiotherapy as part of my cancer treatment. My right bottom cheek hurts from where I scaled it three days ago when my hot water bottle burst and leaked hot water on me.
Pain just ruins things, without pain I would be having an excellent Christmas and that just annoys me.
So I’m complaining here as I don’t want to spoil my family’s day by complaining to them. There is nothing they can do to make it better, so here I am moaning to strangers. Although I do know that the hot water bottle bottom burning will become a family Christmas joke in years to come and that does make me smile

I set fire to the sprouts.

However, DH did all the veg prep yesterday, was helpful in spite of me being a total nob about getting lunch just so....

In the end, despite me being a cantankerous old bag, who managed to burn lots of lunch, everyone has been well fed, spoiled with thoughtful gifts, and the dishwasher is loaded, kitchen cleared down, dog lying in a stupor of being surreptitiously fed treats by everyone.

Earlier DH checked with me that it would be ok if he ran a load of laundry on Christmas day, which he is now hanging on th heated airer.

Having been a grumpy bitch about a few very minor things, (socks and candles making up the majority of my gifts), I have read this thread, given my head a wobble and am now remembering how fucking lucky I am.

My presents from DM came from Temu today. She knows I hate Temu - that it’s so cheap it can only be produced by exploited workers, that much of it is crap quality plastic tat that’s headed straight for landfill. It’s like she buys me stuff from there just to get one over on me, I just don’t know why.

Still, she also:

• genuinely believes exploitative child labour in the developing world is a good thing;
• that free range eggs are a con because “how do we know the farmers aren’t lying about the chickens being free range.” So she goes out of her way to buy eggs from battery hens.
• serves me “vegetarian soup” (as I’m a veggie) which halfway through eating I realise has lumps of chicken in. She tells me she made it using chicken stock.

One of my other presents (again, most likely from Temu) was a small piece of plastic. Apparently it’s an “gadget” for opening cans of drink.

I never buy cans of drink, but in any event I don’t have any difficulty in opening them.

She gave one to my husband and in all likelihood to my DSis and DBiL. It’s obviously something she wanted to buy and it came in a pack of 6 so lucky us eh. 🙄

Thought out partners presents for ages, wrapped and labelled them really nicely. Comes to opening presents when the kids are in bed on Xmas eve and his presents to me are a bit shit, not wrapped, bought on Amazon last minute. Fine, said they were lovely and thank you. He opens mine, clearly lots of thought put into them and then he keeps saying he feels bad because his presents to me are shit in comparison. I placate and say oh don’t be silly of course they’re not shit they’re lovely. Anyway.

We spend today at his parents, first Christmastime ever. Out of my comfort zone but have a lovely day and the kids enjoyed themselves nonetheless. He drives home and when we get back rants and raves about other peoples parking and how he hates living here, he’s sick of it, going to key other peoples cars etc etc. Obviously puts me and kids on edge. Get inside to put youngest to bed and he accuses me of having a face like a slapped arse!! Cut to 10 minutes later and he’s just like ‘sorry’ and tries to give me a hug, it’s the same every time he’s a moody bastard, I’m expected to forget straight away just because he’s mumbled a sorry at me. Try to gently explain how he put us on edge and I can’t switch to being happy straight away just because he said sorry. Now he’s ranting about how dare I start an argument in front of the kids, if this is how it is then he’s going to take eldest to stay in a hotel and I can find my own way with youngest to family get together tomorrow. Silence from me. Comes in 10 minutes later saying ‘sorry but you just take things personally sometimes. If you’re gonna be in a mood with me all night then what’s the point’ The fuck???
Haven’t spoke to him bar an ‘mmhmm’ for an hour. He’s ruined an otherwise lovely day and I’m not allowed to speak my feelings otherwise he flips out. Twat.

Just feeling constantly on edge (thanks nd brain) about nothing and everything. Presents were great for DC but not as great for me (usual smellies which will be raffle prizes). 2nd Christmas without DC’s dad and I just miss him, even though we went through so much and he had so many issues, he still did Christmas and loved playing with the kids. Plus it gave me a break!

Have to remember that we go to DM tomorrow which will be good and we are going away the day after, kids will be at SIL for a day and I get a break, woohoo!!

An update:

Massive row with the in-laws and "D"H.

They sat around being utter arseholes and "D"H not only left me to deal with everything but then disappeared for half the afternoon for a long nap and when he reappeared he sat on his own in the other room.

Dinner was served at 3 as I felt forced to cook early. Kids cranky, tired and hyped up and not hungry, wondering why mum's not playing with them only for one of the uninvited to turn around and call me a mean mummy who never wants to play (I always bloody play with them). All the uninvited moaned about the food.

I shouted that they weren't invited and to go home if they didn't like it. Cue lots of shouting back about how selfish we are for wanting xmas day to ourselves (even though we've been doing it since our oldest was a baby).

In the end I took all the food all off the table and put it in the kitchen. I served only me and the kids. "D"H called me mental. I told them all to get the fuck out.

They went for a walk and then came back an hour later moaning about cold food.

Oh and poor old ASD DS is sobbing because his hand hurts really badly so will probably have to take him up to A&E for antibiotics as no chemists open.

In-laws are always bad but I'm shocked at "D"H as he usually puts them in their place. Even the kids are shocked and avoiding him.

In-laws have camped out in the lounge. "D"h has gone to bed and I've told him he better sort himself out or else.

Kids and I are camping out reading stories and watching a movie.

Merry bloody Christmas.