Does anyone else not hate the big present pile?

[Christmasiscoming2025]

My 4 year olds favourite part of getting presents is opening them so I get him loads of things but it’s not all big gifts/toys. I have got him clothes with his favourite characters on, books, games and puzzles from charity shops, sweets ect.

A lot of people don’t seem to like the big piles of presents on here and say they only get a few presents for their kids and I just don’t really get it as the magic/wow moment is the big pile for kids 🤷‍♀️

I don’t buy lots of gifts as I hate the waste. I do buy them clothes, socks etc that they will use - but I don’t buy for the sake of it. I buy things they need and things they want -

But each to their own - I would only warn you not to start something you can’t finish - lots of gifts for teens is expensive and ‘expected’

I hope most of the gifts are from you not Santa !!!

Each to their own I guess.
Mine would have been overwhelmed with big piles.

Love love love a big present pile. I’ll buy ‘nice’ household items for us to unwrap just to make it larger. I’ve wrapped up nice pillows and mattress toppers before now. My kids loved that sort thing !

Ds already takes an age to open presents, he likes to open one at a time look at it, play with it/read it/use it, we've never encouraged him to tear through thing.

Things like clothes aren't really presents for young children IMO. Teenagers if it's something specific or expensive yes, but children aren't thrilled by a t-shirt. We just buy ds clothes as and when he needs them.

Also you buy a big pile of stuff you have to then have places for it all to go

😂 if I gave DS a pillow wrapped up he'd think I'd lost the plot

Grew up with a big present pile, did it for my kid, love it. Now that my child is older, I don't do it though. Fewer and more expensive presents. Miss the pile a lot though.

I absolutely love buying loads of presents for my kids for Xmas.

My parents were shit but always made sure we came down to a tonne of presents for Xmas day. For me, that’s what made it magical. I would be so excited to see the huge pile of presents waiting for me downstairs.

My partner tells me to only spend £100 each on the kids, but they would literally have about 5 presents. I just can’t do that.

Most of my friends buy under 10 presents, but I just can’t do it!!

I love a big present pile. My children don't get presents from anyone else, so it is all on me. We don't buy much through the year, and don't go mad at birthdays. But at xmas, I love the sheer joy of a big pile of presents on the sofa.

I love it! My three have piles of presents - I wrap up pencils, books, craft stuff, clothes etc that other kids seem to get throughout the year. I save mine up for Xmas and birthdays as they love a big pile and get so excited!

They don't get anything throughout the year though, no magazines etc when we pop to the shops

Can’t stand it. The amount of ‘stuff’ that will ultimately end up in landfill just does my head in. I’m not a Scrooge or an environmentalist but I loathe the endless tat that’s given at Christmas. Giving for giving’s sake seems ridiculous to me.

I like a big present pile. I had Christmases where I didn't get any presents as a child and I freely admit I probably try to overcompensate. It doesn't necessarily equate to 'expensive' - books and pots of slime and other little things that I think would normally be in a stocking are included as we don't do stockings. Things that tend to get replaced semi-regularly anyway. Her main present this year is second hand, although almost new, and was £30. She doesn't bat an eye at second hand stuff and in fact my own gifts, often books, are usually second hand too.

I don't care what other people do EXCEPT I will never understand not wrapping presents at all and just arranging them neatly.

The obscene piles you see on social media? No. Far too much waste and overwhelm.

But equally I hate the “want/need/wear/read” crap too. Xmas shouldn’t be about cutting down and scrimping!

So I have a decent pile for each child with their stocking on the top… and love that!!

Love a big present pile. One of the great things about having an only child is seeing her face on Christmas morning when she realises the big pile under the tree is all hers ❤️

It feels wasteful - I had Christmases where my parents could only afford to get us each something small & cheap (a nerf gun, a doll, a torch) or expensive and shared (e.g. a PlayStation) and they were still magical. I remember playing all day with the toys and my siblings. I loved selecting presents for my parents and siblings with my limited money so giving was also a big part of it too from a young age.

My kids don’t get a pile because it means they don’t have time to play with the toys. The magic of Christmas is in the people you’re with and how it feels not in overconsumption.

I have three kids and a small house. I always wonder where people fit all the 'huge pile' stuff 😂I'm drowning in kids' clothes and shoes as it is!

I've got a wicked headache and I can barely think straight, are you asking if we hate big piles of presents or we don't hate big piles of presents? I hate it. Looks good for a photo up I suppose but it just looks so freaking materialistic, wasteful, greedy, doesn't do much for me...

My kids always loved the big pile and it was supplemented with everyday things too! Now as young adults I have booked a holiday for us all but they have paid for their own flights just to get presents on Christmas morning!

How big is big though?

For me a lot of it comes down to our own childhoods, which then go on to form our expectations.

E.g. if we had happy Christmases, then these become the basis of what is ok, and we can be easy to judge those who do more than us, because it isn't necessary.. Or if we had a less than happy Childhood, it is easy to then react to that and desire either more or less for our own children.

But again how big is big?

I've seen some piles that I think are crazy...
But I know others will think what I do is crazy...
And others will think what they do is crazy...
Down to your 4 present rule mums...
Down to your 1 present mums...
Down to your no presents, lets just give to charity and be together mums...

My best gift for chrismas went like this.

Mum- what you want for xmas this year.
Me - i dont want xmas at all.
Mum-ok lets do that then.

She took that with a smile and we spent our first none xmas having a good house clean and de clutter, not a single dec in sight.
I was 13 at the time, and tbvh it was the best gift ever.
Went for a walk that night had a curry for dinner watched die hard, chatting about random crap.

And i have kept it up ever since then every year, i have a huge clear out deep clean of my home.
Go for walks etc.
I was never a fan of huge piles of gifts or any of the faff, neither was my mother but she did it for the sake of us.
Until we all said the same can we have a none christmas.

I would add that it is part of a larger equation - and people are often quick to judge despite not knowing the rest of the parts of the sum.

E.g. How much does the child get outside of Christmas?

I've known rich families be so proud of giving only 4 presents for Christmas, compared to those "poor" families that give so much... And yet those same rich families are buying things for their kids weekly, every time they go to town, when ever the kid wants something, while the "poor" families, save up and wait until Christmas to do it all.

Also, how much is the kid giving? That is another huge part of the calculation. Of course they shouldn't be giving as much as they are receiving, but I'd rather have a child who receives a lot while giving their mum+dad+grandma a home-made present that they put a lot of care into, than a child that gets less, but gives nothing.

You could keep going, e.g. How materialistic is the child? How generally spoiled are they? How much do you do for Birthdays and other celebrations? How old is the child, are all of the presents plastic toys? or is there useful stuff mixed in? etc. etc.

So many factors come into the equation of whether a pile of presents is suitable, and most of them you won't know, when judging others.

My 4 year old has no frame of reference/ expectation of a big present pile. He's much more likely to open something, play with it a bit, then open something else a bit later. We definitely never had it as kids.

I'm not being sanctimonious. He gets stuff through the year, especially lots of random second hand toys passed on/ chosen in a charity shop.

I don't get the "magic wow" moment bit. Is it some social media thing?

The thing is, your kids just loves the wow. I remember when my son was 2 and he honestly thought that his stocking in his room was the whole thing and he was SO excited about a couple of Hot Wheels that he wanted and I realized then, as I was filming it on an old school video camera, that I didn't ever need to go insane. I just needed to make it be a bit...wow!

Even the words “lots” and “big pile” mean different things to different people. On threads where people list what they’ve got for their dc, I’ve seen posters call a selection of 6 or 7 perfectly nice, varied, not particularly expensive gifts obscene 🙄!

I’ve also seen lists longer than my arm with multiple playsets, big take up lots of space toys, expensive tech gifts and I do wonder where people put all this stuff! Then another post will have a list just as long but half of it would fit in a single drawer because that poster will include things like hair bobbles, a pack of crayons, a sheet of stickers and a multipack of knickers as individual wrapped gifts.

I think do what you’re happy with and what you can afford but keep an eye to the future too. At 4 it’s easy enough to wow them without spending a fortune but as they get older and develop specific tastes and interests, gifts get more expensive and are less likely to be found second hand. If you’ve set the expectation that they get up on Christmas morning to dozens of presents then you may find yourself getting stressed that despite spending more it doesn’t look enough (even though it is).

I think it’s fine, but I hate when people post it on social media. It’s like they are bragging about it.

Up to you. But I hate the bragging involved. I did it once and my kids didn’t use half the stuff - never again!