Does anyone else not hate the big present pile?

[Christmasiscoming2025]

My 4 year olds favourite part of getting presents is opening them so I get him loads of things but it’s not all big gifts/toys. I have got him clothes with his favourite characters on, books, games and puzzles from charity shops, sweets ect.

A lot of people don’t seem to like the big piles of presents on here and say they only get a few presents for their kids and I just don’t really get it as the magic/wow moment is the big pile for kids 🤷‍♀️

Op just do what’s best for your family I used to do this not clothes but books, dvds, toys a bit of everything if you enjoy it and can afford it don’t compare yourself to others. Some people can’t afford it and some people think about the planet wastage etc but you should not expect to follow others.

I go completely overboard despite my best efforts, I really do try but I can’t help it. My two daughters will have a pile each for sure, all of the presents are things I know they’ll love so none of it will be going to waste, lots of books and jigsaws but then dolls etc too. They are so excited to see what Santa has brought and I’m not twitching to buy more just yet.

Love the big present pile !!!

Our DC’s birthday is close to Xmas and then we obviously have Xmas day. Doesn’t matter we still want to have a pile of presents and stocking. No stocking in my household growing up but my parents did wrap a few things separately (from Santa lol). Maybe a toy and then something practical and chocolates. DH and I have always been on the same wavelength with celebrations and enjoy making a fuss and now we have DC to put in the mix.

I loved a big pile as a kid. Now I do genuinely worry about landfill and also where I’d fit all the stuff, so I’d say we do medium piles. I have two different kids, one who would love a big pile and tears through presents, and the other one like another PP who is wowed just by a stocking.

I have tried to save up things they need and things they will use, I do think a big pile under a tree is lovely but ours aren't always for just us, we have lots of family and the best part is always handing out presents to the family that come over - the kids love that! I agree the stocking is always the best bit and when we were younger it was opening one present on Christmas Eve. I think Christmas is so personal to people now, especially in the current cost of living crisis times are so hard and it's so easy to feel we have to over compensate for our children to give them what we were given. Truthfully since growing up found out that my parents would burrow large amounts on catalogues to pay for what we had and that to me felt awful. You just have to do what's right for you and your family and situation. 💚

I grew up with the big present pile and it was magical. We now do that with our children, though don't go too overboard.

Unfortunately, my mum also continues to do that for our children. So we end up with piles and piles of stuff (some that she's bought because it was cheap to make the pile bigger). One year, she had got so much that some of the kids got fed up opening presents and we had to leave some till the next few days. No matter which way you look at it, that's obscene. How much do you need to get for a kid to be fed up opening presents? We also don't have time to play games, which I also remember as a kid and want mine to remember. Sadly they won't.

I wish she would reduce the amount, or transfer to an angel tree if she still wants to buy. Those kids are far more in need and will be incredibly appreciative.

I go round to my parents Xmas eve to boxing day (I've offered many times to host but kids and my mum just love Xmas there and she loves cooking) so with 3 kids, a stepdaughter, ours and parents presents it looks like Santa just dropped a present bomb in the room. But I wouldn't say I buy lots each. I prob would if I only had 1 cos I love Xmas and love getting that special gift! I think I actually more spoiled hubby this year but we've been together 12 years and he has supported me and kids through some dire times so he more than deserves the fussing!! He never asks for anything!

I think it depends how big you mean, there's big and then there's going way overboard where no one can dit in the room.

I do like dd to feel she's had plenty at Christmas, but usually that means a decent stocking and 1-2 main gifts depending on what she's asked for. This year she didn't really ask for anything that I really felt was a proper main so she has a pile of about 7-8 medium size gifts. They all fit into a sack I've bought to put them in this year, so I don't think it's a silly amount.

I also think that the huge amount of packaging can make a not huge number of gifts look massive. When they are unpacked and all of that is gone it looks a very different size!

I got quite a lot of presents as a child but not a disgusting amount. My mum said I always opened each one and was very grateful and spent a lot of time looking at it before moving to the next, which she loved (though present opening took a long time!).

My friends children just tear through their gifts and chuck them to the side. I got them 3 each last year and they didn’t care about any of them. It was open and move on. They didn’t even look remotely pleased with any of them. One even had the cheek to complain I’d only got them 3 gifts! They are getting 1 this year now!😅

I love a massive pile for the kids. It creates the magic. But it’s all stuff they want, need or will use, not landfill tat. They get books and nice pens and pjs etc. as well as the toys. I have friends who give about 5 presents but buy their kids toys nearly every week. E.g. every time we go to a zoo or theme park together whereas we say no to a lot. I also tell my partner off for buying aftershave or socks in November as they should be for Christmas!

I hated when my eldest was small, she just wanted to open the present & get on to opening the next, with hardly a look at what was inside.
I devised a game called Christmas Countdown, where each gift was numbered, and starting at the highest number, they (I had a second by then) could open 3 gifts (say 10, 9, and 8 if there were 10)
Then we’d go & have some breakfast and talk about what had so far been opened, it gave breathing space.
Then go back and have another couple of gifts opened, another break, and a chat.
Sometimes we incorporated a treasure hunt, with a range of clues in envelopes, where they would have to find a gift that has been hidden in the house.
The final gift, number 1, would be their main present, but it might be opened a couple of hours after the first.
It might seem controlling, but the brattiness of an overstimulated child was worse for me.

Why are people always so convince it's 'tat'?

How is the stuff some people are lucky enough to buy year round on a whim magically 'less tat' than the stuff some people have to plan, save for all year and buy in one go?

Or do you (as so many do when saying 'tat') mean your lucky enough time wise, health wise, access wise and money wise that can gift your kids year round 'experience' distractions rather than 'physical' items to entertain them, things that are well outside of many peoples financial abilities. Things like hobbies/extracurricular, trips/days out and holidays that distract from them actually needing physical stuff to do at home all year round.

The kid using their imagination to play tea party in their bedroom surrounded by their dolls and teddies with their toy tea set in their fancy dress costume with the crown they made from their craft set is not surround by 'tat' or 'spoiled' more than the kid thats parents can afford to send them out of the house to ballet/gymnsatics/horse riding/music/football etc... after school clubs instead to fill that time.

Unless you are saying you really don't provide anything stimulation for your your kids all year round to make you superior in your race to the bottom... in which case thats not something to be proud of and something child services actively look for in neglect cases.

Privilege or neglect... wonder which it is.

Because it’s MN Christmas bingo.

Piles of tat.

Frenzied unwrapping.

Children bored of opening presents.

We do experiences with our children not material things.

Something you need, something to wear, something to read, something you want being trotted out repeatedly

‘Twas ever thus.

We are team big present pile too. I think I try to recreate the christmases that I had as a child and we always came down to a really exciting pile.

I buy a lot of things second hand from Vinted or charity shops. I also wrap craft kits and supplies which are a god send for half terms etc all year long.

What’s considered a big present pile? 10+ or 30+? Im probably team big present pile but I do buy about 12/13 gifts per child which all vary in size and price. It looks like a big present pile to my 4 years old I guess. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Partner grew up with huge piles of presents, and there were three of them to buy for, yet he is the most humble guy who doesn't ask for anything.

My sister's kids are lovely but have been brought up on huge piles of presents for every occasion, and it recently got to the point (early teens) where they stopped thanking me for gifts and money I was sending. I think it largely depends on the parents.

My kids rip them all open and move on to the next but as soon as they've finished unwrapping they look at them properly and start playing with them, I don't see whats wrong with that or do you mean your kids unwrapped all the presents didn't look at them and then started complaining they was bored and showed no interest in presents at all

I love how it looks for DC but personally I think we all go OTT for the sake of it and hate the waste. Xx

Just a word of warning, OP:
What they want gets much, much smaller and much more expensive as the years go by. Just have a slight eye on keeping expectations within manageable limits each year that goes by.

No, they didn’t complain about being bored.
It was the frenzy of opening them that, even if they were at the end of opening their gifts, they were addicted to the thrill of opening them and wanted to continue the high.
They were only small, but it didn’t seem healthy (it felt like they had a hundred e-numbers 😬)
They just needed an adult to step in and help them manage their feelings.
They love the Christmas Countdown.
They are adults now and it’s mainly clothes and toiletries (plus a nice envelope as number 1)
Glad what you do works for you.

I think I'm like your first point too but I don't think I'm 'humble' just awkward about the whole thing.

I was a very lucky child and got loads at Christmas as a kid, MN would label me 'spoiled' if they had saw the piles.

I never asked for anything and dont expect anything from anyone in life (except my DH because we are a team). I was raised that 'begging' for stuff you don't need was the height of rudeness, that you just don't expect and demand gifts. If you get them its an nice thing but its not 'owed' to you.

As such I find the concept of writing gift lists (even to Santa) so uncomfortable because 'asking' for stuff was never part of our Christmas. I hate being asked 'what do you want?', they don't need to give me anything if they are struggling.

I must admit I do enjoy a 'full' tree on Christmas eve, we don't do individual piles it's all under the tree so it's really easy to have it look full without going nuts or spending unnecessarily, especially with a 5 year old!

We've got 4 large presents (a pc for the eldest, one of 5 presents, the others being small and fairly cheap, a folding gym mat and scooter for the youngest, and a bug salt gun for OH), so with the others (8 smaller ones for youngest, 4 for biggest and then my 1) filling in the gaps it's going to look epic this year and I can't wait to see their faces.

I don't know why I like it, I do remember the feeling the one Christmas as a kid when it looked like we had loads, there were a few big ones and only a handful of smaller ones each but just the immediate feeling on seeing it has stuck with me and I want my kids to feel it too.

I don't think it's materialism, I'm not materialistic in any way otherwise, I love gifting, I enjoy Christmas more now as a parent than I think I did as a child receiving

I enjoy the giving more as an adult too, it's lovely seeing dd enjoy things I've chosen. I also don't think it's materialistic, it is just one day of the year after all. I also think people have a different understanding of what a big pike is, to me yours sounds great and plenty without being over the top.