How much do you spend on your adult kids of Chistmas

[J7223j]

I have an 18 year old and 22 year old and wondered what those of you with similar age children spend on presents for them?

Our mid 20s children asked for something similar. Neither were able to think of anything they wanted other than about £100 worth of odds and ends. They are not materialistic and do not see the point in getting stuff for the sake of it. Now that they are adults we don't buy random things for them - only what is expressly asked for.

They suggested we make some donations to local foodbanks. I think we all enjoy this more than gettng them stuff that they don't really need.

It's an annual thing each year.

My children are very short of funds and have asked to do secret Santa. I kind of resent spending lots of money on them and getting one smaller thing myself when I do all the organisation , cooking. and present buying.
I will get one thing in return. What do people do in this situation?

I would understand if my children were too hard up to buy presents apart from one Secret Santa gift. Just buy yourself a nice gift from you to you.

Yes, it’s just last time I put all this work into their presents. Did all the prep and cooking and hosting for two weeks and had one scarf as a present. Sounds a bit grinch like but I felt a bit crap .

I do know what you mean because I used to feel like I put a lot of effort into people's presents and get mostly tat back.

That's why I now make absolutely sure I get at least one really nice thing I want, even if I have to buy it for myself! It makes me feel better 😊

But I would be easy going about my children not buying me anything worth having if I knew they were hard up. Secret Santa is better than getting lots of cheap tat you don't actually want.

Reading with interest. Mine are 26 and 31 but both are currently single and they won’t get gifts from partners. I’ll spend about £250 each- half on main gift and then bits such as PJs. However, I’m not with their dad and he will spend the same so they do pretty well tbh. I guess once the Grandkids arrive (hurry up), we will spend less on them and more on the grandkids.

Total budget for Christmas gifts for family is 1k and then extra for food. I have a huge family, whereas my husband doesn’t so we just buy separately. He does put towards the gifts for my children though, maybe £50 each.

Mine are 26,24 and 18. Around £20\30 each.
We have never been big spenders and I'm happy to get a chocolate orange and a bottle of Bailey's for my gift.

The honest answer is to only spend as much as you’re able to afford. Yet again there are many answers given by swank posters.

How odd. Why is that?

We still buy for both our boys. One has SN and will never work. The other has just started his first job, will be travelling 400 miles to see us at Christmas and will appreciate some treats. Spend only as much as you can afford but everyone enjoys a few treats which don't need to be expensive - very little joy to be found in some of these posts.

Hmm. Mine is 21 and still studying. I normally do a her a stocking with stuff like nice stationery, shampoo, chocolate, socks in. Will buy her some trainers, pyjamas, notebooks, nice jumper etc for under the tree, and then transfer some cash. She likes the cash best . She is trying to persuade her boyfriend to travel more, so I am tempted to get them each e.g. a Ryanair gift card this year. We are bit limited on family members these days and abroad, so I have always gone a bit further to make sure there was a suitable amount of pressies under the tree for her. I had a million aunties growing up and I can't cope with an empty tree.

Yep. MIL is in her early 80s, a comfortably off widow who will be taking her DC, their partners, DGC, their partners and some waifs and strays to Boxing Day lunch. She spends about £150 on gifts for each person (we have to send an Amazon link!) and insists that no one buys her anything on pain of being banished from next year's festivities. She can afford it and it gives her great pleasure.

And she donates generously to charities all year round.

Same in my house, we do kris kindle and if my parents draw one of their children then they buy but other than that nothing. If they come for dinner on xmas day they will come empty handed. Its not that they don't have it, they do they just choose not to. I thought it was normal until spoke to friends and then seen my husbands family. My inlaws are very generous and still give their children money even though the youngest is nearly 50. If we go for dinner to my in laws we also come out laden with food etc. Its odd but then everyone is different

Can you suggest that no one buys presents but everyone brings something to share for the meal/festivities?

you resent getting your kids a present because you are hosting and only get one present in return? 😬

I know that sounds awful. But I’ve been killing myself every year for everyone else. I’ve just had enough of it .

Two sons aged 20 and 17. About £200 ish each. They get a couple of big presents then little bits....new pyjamas, socks etc. I've always been a practical parent Lol

on the other hand I have hosted my mother many a time for Xmas. and she doenst bring anything. not even a box of roses. turns up eats drinks and sits on her arse. I have stopped doing it now. and I get the passive paggrssive comments every year just goes over my head now.

My special needs adult ds has had a new winter coat from me already to count towards Xmas (as he was walking around with a jacket with holes in!). He will get some other clothes and I’ve helped him pay for a trip he wants to take (I’m guessing combined I’ve probably spent £500 on him). He needs a bit of extra support.

adult dd asked for a cashmere jumper and cash - I will probably spend the same on her

I’ve been putting it aside all year so it’s not a big hit in one go

Mine are 18 and 20, and I spend about £250 on them each. A lot is practical and consumables and things like PJs etc with stuff they want like fragrance and make-up etc.

About £500 each.
£50 on their partners.

Bet their partners love you 😂

My parents put £50 in a card to DH and I every Christmas. Been the same since I turned 18 then DH was added on to the card when he came along. They give each of us £30 in a card for birthdays.

LOL! They aren’t living together partners. I probably should have said BF/GF.

I also pay for each DC accommodation abroad every year for them to holiday with their DP.

They do love me, honest! You are right though, I will definitely need to rethink this as things “progress” 😊

I was just teasing you @Zempy 😀

I'm facing a similar dilemma as DD and her BF are thinking of moving in together. I love splurging on DD but think I'll split the budget rather than double it to include BF!