Works Christmas do

[Heartattack41]

What do you all do to accommodate every one for a works Christmas do? Only 15 or so if us but some are Muslim so don't drink or gamble , need halal food etc. One is in a wheelchair and needs accessibility, one is grumpy and refuses everything. Just after some fresh ideas that I can put to everyone.

Well that’s told us. Thanks for coming.

Lot of anti-muslim sentiment coming out for a simple thread about a Christmas party

“Just go for a curry”

as if Muslims ONLY eat curry. So fucking stupid.

Assuming the curry is halal (I know we call it ‘Indian’ food but most of the curry places I’ve been to, other than those owned by relatives, are Pakistani owned and halal) would exclude both Sikhs, who can’t have any animal that has been ritually slaughtered, and Jews, who can’t eat halal.

Explain to me again how this doesn’t exclude anyone? What if I have a nut allergy?

We’re in a similar position. We asked our Muslim colleague what they’d be comfortable with. We ended up in a restaurant, rather than a pub. I’d just check it’s accessible first. We tend to have a nice lunch rather than a night out so we can include everyone.

Lots of Muslim women won't set foot in a pub even during the day

@elbone No one has said the Christmas party should be mandatory. You seem to have completely fabricated this.
No-one, including me, has said the Christmas party should be mandatory. I will simplify it for you. You (not just you, lots of PP) seem to have completely misunderstood me (deliberately?). I have said that everyone should feel able to attend a works event; and that some people may not feel able to attend a "Christmas party".

As I say, I have worked with people who have told me they feel this way; I don't really know what you think should happen, should the rest of us have gone "ah tough, fuck you, we're having a Christmas party anyway and you can come if you want but you don't have to"? Rather than go, ah interesting - hadn't occurred to me before, thanks for raising it, let's not call it a Christmas party then so you don't feel excluded? Or should we have gone "well if we can't have a Christmas party then let's not do anything, you spoilsport"?

Anyway, I am sure you are all very nice people, even if you're not willing to take a step back and think, maybe other people feel differently about things than I do, and maybe I can take on board other points of view.

Just because you’re offended, doesn’t mean other people should have their culture erased.

We should be celebrating cultures. Not removing them from existence.

even if you're not willing to take a step back and think, maybe other people feel differently about things than I do, and maybe I can take on board other points of view

actually laughed out loud at this.

“Why would you invite Muslims?”
“Just go for a curry”

You’re so out of touch it’s laughable.

Anyway, I am sure you are all very nice people, even if you're not willing to take a step back and think, maybe other people feel differently about things than I do, and maybe I can take on board other points of view.

Goes both ways surely.

What you posted went beyond some people feeling uncomfortable and to not mentioning Christmas or anything related to it such as crackers which is all manner of fucked up.

How did the Christians feel about their festival and all association being banned? Or don't they count?

As a previous poster said Jesus is a very important prophet in Islam and so many Muslims celebrate his birth to some extent. I have worked in a few schools in very multicultural areas and have never really had an issue with religion or faith. Often what divides people is the cost of the event. We used to book a restaurant or pub with a separate area.

We would start off with tea coffee and cakes at school then move onto the restaurant later and then those who wanted to would go off clubbing. It just meant there was a bit of something for everyone.

@candlewhickgreen How did the Christians feel about their festival and all association being banned? Or don't they count?
I can't speak for all the Christians, I didn't ask everyone. I'd be quite surprised if any of them had said they can't attend a works meal that isn't described as "a Christmas do", given that would be very limiting for 11 months of the year. Personally, as a Christian (practising) I felt entirely comfortable attending a work event that wasn't labelled as a Christmas party, but did happen in December, i.e. at around Christmas time. I continued to celebrate Christmas with my family and friends outside of work, I attended other Christmas parties outside of work, and I enjoyed church - which I attended outside of work time, and didn't ask anyone at work to accompany me to, and actually probably didn't even mention to anyone (of any faith or denomination) in the workplace. I did not feel that I lost anything, and I didn't labour under the delusion that anything had been banned; I admit, I was a bit disappointed about the lack of crackers at the meal, I do like a cracker, but I can live with that if it means that my entire team felt comfortable to attend.

@LordEmsworth do you have a shovel?

I have personal experience of arranging a Christmas party and being told that I had offended some of the team (who were Muslims) because they don't celebrate Christmas and felt excluded. I am sorry that you think I shouldn't have listened to them, and asked them where they would be comfortable going (guess what they said...).

The fact that you can't understand hyperbole doesn't mean I'm not allowed to use it to make a point - I am sorry it went over your head.

I did, in my very first post, suggest some other alternatives. Why is afternoon tea so laughable? I would have thought that most faiths and denominations would eat sandwiches, and cakes can easily be arranged to suit dietary requirements. Tea or coffee can be replaced with juice, or booze for those who want it. Or an activity like wreath making would be seasonal rather than cultural/religious, avoid dietary requirements, and people who want to can arrange to go elsewhere themselves afterwards. Did you not bother reading that, and just cherry pick the bits you don't like?

ROFL, I don't need one, you lot have all got the flaming torches and pitchforks out.

I am very sorry that none of you feel it's relevant to take different religions, faiths, cultures and perspectives into account. I am also very sorry that you're all reading in things I haven't said while ignoring the things I have said. I understand and accept your right to have a Christmas party, I hope you enjoy it.

Don't be daft. In our office everyone goes to Christmas lunch regardless of creed.

As usual, it's people assuming Muslims are offended by the word Christmas, and then they get all defensive about it.
Honestly, I know and work with many Muslims and they all (without exception) come to the Christmas lunch. There's never an issue with food - they simply order vegetarian or fish.
A PP is claiming that Muslims she or he works with refuse to attend Christmas events. I find this quite hard to believe as I and many others have never experienced this with Muslim colleagues.
Just choose a nice restaurant that has good vegetarian/fish options and is accessible for wheelchair users. Easy! What a lot of fuss about nothing.
And the idea that Muslims will only enjoy curry is a little racist, in my opinion!

Because we should CELEBRATE cultures not erase them.

I’m equally as supportive of Eid events, Diwali events, Hanukkah events being arranged with an open, non-mandatory, invitation. It’s what makes living in a diverse society so good.

My Hindu ex-colleague always attended the Christmas do. In fact his role was at its quietest in December so he'd often decorate the office and put the tree up too.

OP, we're also about 15 in the office and after years of cripplingly dull joiner parties always with a crap DJ we've switched to lunches in recent years and everyone prefers it. The non-drinkers have lunch and then get on with their day, the drinkers can carry on if they want to. We don't have many employees with kids but if childcare were an issue they'd be welcome to bring them. The lack of a DJ churning out Christmas cliches makes it feel more like a normal meal out for those who don't celebrate Christmas. It works better for everyone.

@SallyWD A PP is claiming that Muslims she or he works with refuse to attend Christmas events. I find this quite hard to believe as I and many others have never experienced this with Muslim colleagues. Thanks for clarifying. I now realise that when 2 of the team approached me to tell me they were upset, I should've said "I've never experienced this before so you must be lying" 🙄. I'll do that next time.

Our last Xmas party held after work in a local pub had Muslim Jewish Hindu various Christian types and atheists all attending.

Meal was pre-ordered and pre-paid, vege options included .

We paid for our own drinks as we went, though a generous manager also bought several rounds and bottles.

Those not drinking alcohol for religious reasons, pregnant or driving chose a non alcoholic drink.

Those who didn't want to attend or had other plans, didn't come.

It was all over by 8.30pm and those who wanted to carry on partying, did

No muss no fuss.

You can make this as complicated as you want .... Or not

@LordEmsworth

Assuming

a. you are in the UK and
b. The arrangements made were not mandatory attendance in a drinking establishment with pork and stuffing batches the only food option

I would very diplomatically remind anyone offended by a Christmas do that this is the UK and Christmas is one of the 2 most significant cultural and religious events in the UK and that people have the right to celebrate it.
I would also remind them of the significant adjustments that are made to enable the observance of Ramadan, prayers, particularly Friday prayers, celebration of Eid, Diwali etc and that no one objects to that.
I would also remind them that attendance is not compulsory
I'd be interested to know if your team members who were upset by the notion of a Christmas do set foot in a shop, stop watching TV, leave the house between September and December because otherwise they cannot avoid Christmas.

Please don't buy into this nonsense. I highly doubt any Muslims were offended by it. It's a myth perpetrated by white people. I've yet to meet a Muslim who is offended by Christmas. On the contrary, they are interested and respectful of other religious traditions.
And let's be honest here - your average UK works Christmas lunch will have absolutely nothing to do with Jesus.

@SallyWD

I'm not buying into it. I too never experienced any non Christian objecting to a Christmas do.
In fact one of the biggest fans of Christmas was a part time Iman who observed prayers every day and dressed in traditional Indian dress, and whose lovely Pakistani wife sent on boxes of home made samosas for every festival going.

I don't have faith myself but my parents are practising Christians who find certain aspects of the over commercialised Christmas very difficult. No one thinks about people like them who may be offended

Actually. Wreath making would be questionable for Muslims. There are rules around Muslims hanging wreaths etc.

You really should do more research about what is inclusive before flinging ideas out.