Christmas moaning thread - let it all out here!

[BlowDryRat]

Getting it started early this year! The general purpose of the thread is to have somewhere posters can let off steam about family, visitors, members of the public, the shops presents (or lack thereof), food and any other Christmas-related moans. No telling other posters to LTB, go NC or any other dramatic advice. No posting in expectation of advice or a reply. Long rants encouraged. Let it goooo!

My moan: DH has been ill all week and home from work. I was in the office for a couple of days but have been WFH the rest of the week. On Wednesday, DH dragged himself out of bed to spend the afternoon destroying the kitchen cooking for his hobby's Christmas party. He then went to the party, got back at 10-ish declaring that he was far too ill to clean up the mess he'd made in the kitchen and collapsed back into bed. He got up again on Thursday morning declaring that a bit of time in the fresh air would do him the world of good and buggered off to the hills for the day, returning after dark I cleaned the kitchen... Then today, when I was working flat out so I could finish for Christmas, he decided to set off the Roomba next to my desk. I turned it off so I could hear myself think. He then got out the vacuum cleaner I pointed out that that was equally annoying and he went back to bed in a grump. Because he couldn't possibly vacuum any other room in the house.

His mother is coming up at the weekend to stay for Christmas. She stays every year because BIL declared some years ago that he and SIL just wanted to have Christmas to themselves and wouldn't be visiting or hosting So we can never have a relaxing Christmas without hosting duties, because otherwise MIL would be by herself. I personally think that BIL is a selfish git, but DH won't gently suggest to him that he reconsider his arrangements. Absolutely nothing is ready for MIL's stay, except the stocking that I bought, wrapped and filled this week.

So I finished work, picked up a pile of washing, tried to take it upstairs but it was all slippery football kit so kept dropping bits. Found DH in bed, on his phone, curtains closed and all lights off. Dumped the washing and declared I was off to the gym where nothing would annoy me. Remembered while I was there that I was also annoyed with him because he ate my last birthday Ferrero Rocher. Went on the treadmill for a bit, then to a Spin class. Bought myself replacement chocolate on the way home. Now feel much better.

I also couldn't sleep last night due to the mental load. Now I haven't got up early enough to buy Christmas without massive crowds in Asda. I've had a virus and it's made my heart go jittery. I won't go to A&E again as it was sooo awful. GP wouldn't see me as I should have gone in to A&E! I've managed to work this week somehow, I'm working over Christmas as well. Moany festive moan.

Had a random seizure almost 3 weeks ago and was taken to hospital - only just got out.. Doctors think I have secondary brain cancer. They haven’t managed to locate the primary yet so I’m due a PET scan for that. It was cancelled twice this week as machine was broken, and I knew it wouldn’t be done until after Christmas. So I decided not to sit around in hospital waiting for them to fix it, which is what they wanted, and to discharge myself and take my chances on an outpatient appointment for the scan.

Trying not to think about things too much until I’ve got definite answers but it’s bloody hard.

On the bright side, I will have Christmas with my family including my two little girls 😍

I have had 2 months of some 🦠virus that I caught on a city break.
It has restarted all my Long Covid symptoms all I have felt like doing is sleeping.
My wife asked for one specific present and I forgot.
I am so sad.
Last year we had a lovely run up to Christmas but this year....
😳
I haven't decorated the house properly or even put a wreath on the door.

This is a selfish moan, I know and I am very lucky to be as well as I am, even though I am in constant pain. So many people came off worse with Covid.but it feels so unfair to be facing all the symptoms yet again.

All I want for Christmas is my ability to cope and organise!

Love this thread. You are all brilliant and my moan is tiny in comparison, but I shall commit it here nevertheless for a chuckle.

My DH is fab but there is something about Christmas that brings out the full misogynist in him.

HE finished for Christmas yesterday from HIS very important business empire. Now that HE has finished and will be closed until 8 Jan, Christmas has begun and HE will begin sitting in his chair listening to loud music and watching the boxing weigh in. HE also went in the bath for two hours after getting in a masssive grump because the butcher accidentally sent the meat out for delivery and HE had driven 20 mins out of HIS way to pick it up. Of course this meant that I had to reorganise my plans so that someone would be here to answer the door in case it came while HE was in the bath (it did). I also finished up various bits of client work, texted a fellow mum about a sleepover and wrote a note to Akela to say that sadly, DS wouldn’t be back to cubs in Jan.

Once out of the bath HE banged around a bit when the Sonos went on the blink and Christmas might have to be cancelled because ‘the WIFI is fucking shit in this house’ and it’s the end of the world.

This was all fine until it got to 7.30 (Wi-Fi back to normal) when I asked if he actually wanted any dinner. Guess what he said from his throne? Yes, you can make it for about 8.

For fuckity fucks sake!. I’ve done all the thinking, done most of the shopping, cleaned the house, worked my socks off to finish today (until 2 Jan) and now I need to make the dinner too. I don’t actually mind making the dinner and was expecting to, but in order to cater for HIS ‘body is a temple diet’ which HE will completely ignore when HE is cooking, I need to make cauli rice and whizz cauliflower in the whizzer which I fucking hate doing.

Anyway, I made it. He teased me for stomping around the kitchen with my ‘cleaning face’ on. I had some more wine and an early night and snored like foghorn leghorn for 9 hours. I’ve got up this morning and he has done the washing up and put a wash on.

Equilibrium is restored.

My moan is my DD5 spotted a present for her friend and doesn't understand its not for her, yet she has a massive pile of presents to open today..

She cries all the way in the car to the contact centre where she sees her abusive father..

She proceeds to tell me she's hates me but loves daddy as he'll give her all the presents.

I felt cut.

Literally can't wait for Xmas to be over.

These are all excellent grumbles. Sorry to those who are really suffering

DD has been counting the presents under the tree to make sure it's "fair" and is sad because she's "only" got 2 presents. DS told her to stop acting like Dudley Dursley. We'll done DS. (A third, enormous present will magically appear on Christmas Eve. It's been kept in the loft to stop her poking at it.)

I've had enough and I'm over it already and it's not even Christmas Eve yet. I wanted Christmas at home just us three and our dogs this year which has meant that we've had to cram in a visit to family before, which has resulted in over stimulated dogs an over tired 9 year old and I'm ill.

I still need to do the Christmas food shop tonight which is going to be actual hell on earth.

Husband is being an arse and the lest sympathetic person ever and resorts to being a complete dick and makes we wonder why we're married.

My friend asked to spend Christmas together then made other plans two weeks ago and has only just got in touch now to find out what I'm planning to do. You'd think at nearly 40 years old he would be capable of making Christmas plans well in advance and taking on some of the mental load. He is the type who is very focused on feelings but is just thoughtless so if he'd come along to my plans he would have turned up empty handed. To a stranger's house at Christmas!

I broke up with my boyfriend but he can't move out for over a week and has no plans for Christmas. So I can't have a relaxing Christmas morning before I go out or lay about on boxing day as he will be there. Also the house smells of man! His room is especially manly and it wafts through the house when he goes to the bathroom. I'm glad I put him in a room without carpet. I just want him to goooo so I can play Christmas songs and drink prosecco in my pyjamas and shout on the phone to my sister and not clean up his gross hairs in the bath

I have to spend time with my lovely friend's complete arse of a husband today. He constantly makes pathetic bitchy little put downs and bores us with his boasting about money, houses and cars. As a bonus he turns downright nasty and spiteful when he's had a drink. I can't tell him to fuck off as it would upset my friend but he is hard work that I could happily do without. As soon as I see his eyes glint with drink I'm off!

DHs family have all gone back to the European country MIL is from for two weeks. We repeatedly reminded them that DH only gets Xmas Day and Boxing Day off and therefore couldn’t join them. Non stop messages about how it’s so sad we aren’t there. FWIW we offered to host everyone here and have space for them all.

Still, means we see my family who are generally rational and reasonable humans who pitch in with helping and don’t have to juggle seeing both families.

This was hilarious to read, just the way its worded had me snorting with laughter

DM staying, thankfully leaves today. She asked to borrow deodorant and a toothbrush charger (lucky for her ours fits hers). Every time she comes she asks to borrow something, in the past it's been pants, my only pair of slippers, socks and pyjamas.

This morning she called me disgusting (I'm not COMPLETELY sure why but I was taking her and DD to an activity and DS despite not wanting to go was trying to climb in and on the car because it winds DH and DD up so he gets lots of attention (he has SEN, not an excuse but a challenge to manage). My strategy is lock the car door and wait for him to get bored which he did. She then called the radio programme I had on idiotic (it was very interesting as it was about a part of the world I have lived in).

Other than that, minor annoyance with DH who said "don't buy me a novelty t-shirt" after I'd bought him two. Tough.

All food however now bought though I have a Christmas cake shaped itch since I didn't make one. Maybe I'll nip to Booths early tomorrow and get one.

@Iaspo That sounds incredibly tough - I'm glad you've managed to escape for a but and be with your family.

My moan is that I finished work on Wednesday. Immediate felt a sore throat, which by 2am had turned into the full fever, sweats, aches, horrendous cough. 😫 Pretty sure it's Covid, either way it has completely taken me out. Shattered and feeling very very poorly. Can barely stand up long enough to make a cuppa without running out of breath.

So cancelled visiting family, opera, nice new restaurant lunch and tomorrow's panto. Probably not going to do Christmas on 25th, might get a takeaway in instead. Thank goodness I've I've able to freeze all the festive food.

Two of our adult dc announced yesterday that they hadn’t thought about how they were getting here tomorrow. Neither drive. Guess who’s got a lot of driving to do tomorrow?

(I want them here so although I’m grumpy I wouldn’t not do it)

Love this thread!

My grumbles include family and um family!

My DS has SEN and can have really challenging behaviour. I want to give him absolutely nothing for Christmas. There's only so many times one can hear fat useless Mum. FF hour later, sorry mum I love you. Honestly the boy has me in 48393 different moods in a day!

Next moan is actually about DP family.. DP and his Mum & Dad fell out in July/Aug time, it was about MIL tendency to completely favour our DS and undermine us as parents. DP finally said look leave it to us. We thought this would be it (in my family stuff like this is quickly forgotten about)

FF to now and no ones speaking. We usually go there for Christmas, I'm sad, the girls are sad. I'm even sadder that my 8 month old has zero clue who they are. I flit between being sad and then being angry.

I love Christmas and I love being at home with my (immediate) family. I love lights and nice food and cheesey films. We have a couple of planned events and the rest is just chilled fun.

But dear lord I'm sick of people on the internet telling me how I should do it. I know I don't have to go on social media but I enjoy seeing others enjoyment.

There's two camps "it's just one day, people are struggling, just be grateful but don't post anything that might offend anyone who is struggling" and the "you only have 18 christmases with your children and they'll remember this forever so it must be perfect". I don't subscribe to either camp and I don't really live my life by social media but both comments do manage to give me a twinge of guilt and anxiety.

I just want to continue loving it how it is!

I ran out of washing capsules so placed a next day delivery order with Smol on Thursday. They didn't turn up yesterday. I've just checked DPD's tracking and realised that I've sent £20 worth of eco cleaning supplies to my friend at the other end of the country 🤦‍♀️ Will have to go out and buy some now!

My parents arrived this morning - a 160-mile trip. I suggested they leave early to avoid the traffic. They arrived at 8.15 am this morning - I was still asleep in bed.

I have lived alone most of my life and have gotten used to peace and quiet. Mother does not stop talking (about herself) - the same old stuff I have heard numerous times before. I tried to talk about 'me' for 5 minutes but she derailed the conversation back to talking about her.

Dad's phone keeps pinging with notifications - it's a long tune that grates on me - turn the fucking thing off.

The pair of them are constantly on their phones/iPads doing god knows what, but every now and again one of them will play a video on high volume. I admire how they have embraced technology in their advancing years, but I find it rude.

So now I am being rude and have escaped to my snug with the cat.

I have 3 days of this - looking forward to going back to work already 😆.

I’ve lost the Christmas stocking chocolate.
i distinctly remember buying it. Coins of silver and gold. Chocolate sprouts…
It is nowhere. No one has eaten it.
I’ve hunted high and low. Not sure I have the energy to start in one corner and search the entire house, I mean, how many places do you hide Christmas chocolate?? I can only surmise that I’ve thrown it out by mistake. Terrific.
Oh and I forgot crackers.
Worst Mum ever. No chocolate coins and no crackers.
I’m not braving Tesco again after yesterday’s parking shit show.
I’m just annoyed that I’ll find them in January.
I blame the menopause.

I had a lovely lunch with my lovely friend and got home to a parcel. Opened it (wasn't wrapped) and it's a coffee and biscuit hamper from my ex in laws.

Which sounds lovely but I'm coeliac and can't eat any of the biscuits, all the coffee is ground and I don't own a cafetière.

They didn't have to send me anything of course and it's a lovely gesture, but...

At least I can regift it all 😊😊

I’ve come down with a horrible virus. I live for Christmas and look forward to it for months. I’ve planned relentlessly and now I feel so ill, I just don’t give any shits about any of it. It’s probably the last year DC will believe in Father Christmas and I’m just exhausted. Missing my girl’s festive night out tonight that I’ve looked forward to.

And my passive aggressive perfectionist mum is coming to stay for the next few days, so that is just tipping me over the edge…

I feel your pain. My 75 year old father’s main topic of conversation is his iPhone and the deal he got from Tesco Mobile. He has three active ones - one for online shopping, one for his emails (used mainly for complaints) and a final one for calls which he doesn’t use because he refuses to pay for ‘expensive minutes’. FFS. He does at least WhatsApp my 8 year old using lots of emojis. 😆😆👀👻

Food related irritations, mostly based around DP's determination to be the person who does household stuff.

He doesn't like having a store cupboard. He doesn't like feeling like we're buying 'too much'. He doesn't like me using the kitchen because I get grumpy when it needs cleaning from top to bottom, the plates stacked precariously in a heap in the cupboard, the leftover food in the pans thrown out and both the sink and dishwasher cleaned of bits of food before use.

He also doesn't like putting stuff away. Or that there's no countertop space because he's left every fucking thing on the countertops, including random books, post, half empty tins, bits of bread and potatoes in plastic bags sweating in daylight to go green. It's only a waste to buy more than two potatoes half an hour before you use them because you waste entire bags of the things.

Yeah, it's great, you cook. Yeah, great, you clean (I'm done with Saturday mornings cleaning the entire kitchen to see it trashed before I ever get to use it - and five Christmases where I scrubbed it until it gleamed, only for you to decide it was the perfect time to make shit pastry and leave flour everywhere, not cleaning it up because you were 'tired from cooking last night'.

I don't like GF cheese straws. Why do you make thousands? Nobody likes them, not even you. And don't even think about making gingerbread as well. Make food, not incredibly expensive masonry.

Arggh.

Minor light hearted moan. The house is full of delicious food and drink. I have spent the past 2 days (and many previous weekends) cooking so we have a freezer full of profiteroles, boxes of cheese straws, homemade trifle in the fridge, you get the idea.

And I’m not hungry in the slightest.

Minor light hearted... I think.

I have to see my parents and their parents tomorrow and Boxing Day. Neither of them cook any food or even have a chair for me and my 2 DC so I awkwardly stand while they all sit and then they don't have any Christmas food and they buy minimal presents, almost as if we aren't welcome so I count down the seconds until we leave. Their parents don't even talk to me.

Now I know what you're thinking! Don't go but they moan so much about how we never visit and they miss us so much (my DC really, not me) and we mean the world to them but make it so uncomfortable when we are there. Gets me so upset every year because all I wanted was a big loving family.