Page 8 | Lighthearted: If you're not British, what's the Christmas food that you just can't eat?

BetsyBobbins · 2023-12-09T15:17:45+00:00

I've been in the UK 22 years now, but I can't still bring myself to eat some of the traditional British Christmas food. I tried them once and never again. Mind you, this is coming from someone who got used to, and now loves baked beans among other things. But Good Lord, what's up with the Victorian puddings and cakes? Christmas pudding: Looks like Elephant poo, smells like stale booze and tastes like soil. Christmas cake: More of the same. Looks horrid, smells weird and has an even worse texture, a mix of soil and sawdust. Plus, how can you trust something that was cooked months in advance? I don’t. Mince pies: now, that is the worst of all. Looks good, I’ll give them that, but they smell like vomit and have the texture of baby sick. Tell me the ones you never got used to

Hattie89 · 10/12/2023 17:15

flyingvisit · 10/12/2023 11:32

Roasts, Just Roasts....bleuurgh

YABVU

Hattie89 · 10/12/2023 17:23

nameXname · 09/12/2023 22:40

Am ancient British (Scottish) and many of the things now touted as 'traditional' really are not so. As others have said, pigs in blankets are a modern marketing ploy. Traditionally no-one traditionally EVER ate cauliflower cheese with a roast, or mashed potatoes, either. Sugar-glazed carrots and ditto parsnips as an accompaniment are also not trad, and, IMHO, an abomination. Cranberry sauce is American - as others have also said 'why put jam on your meat?'- and Yorkshire puddings were traditionally only an accompaniment to roast beef, not to chicken or turkey.

Bread sauce was a trad luxury accompaniment to dry game birds, and, if properly made, can be good (breadcrumbs, single cream, butter, an onion stuck with cloves, a bay leaf, plenty of salt and pepper and an optional sprinkling of nutmeg). But it's wrong with other roasts except perhaps LEAN poultry. I agree also with previous poster about stuffing; the whole point of it used to be to put it inside the bird to absorb some of the fat/juices/flavour during the cooking and thereby create something extra to eat. The simplest versions were breadcrumbs, chopped onion, parsley, salt and pepper and an egg to bind the mixture togther. Fancier versions involved sausage meat and lemon peel - small quantities - as well.

If only people could taste some of the simpler, more elegant past versions of Christmas foods, rather than today's offerings.

Brussels sprouts WERE trad - because, again as a prvious poster has said - they were one of the few green veg available at that time in winter. But has anyone here ever tried chopped brussels sprouts very, very quickly stir-fried with garlic and black pepper and - if you like them - chopped chestnuts.? A revelation.

But has anyone here ever tried chopped brussels sprouts very, very quickly stir-fried with garlic and black pepper and - if you like them - chopped chestnuts.? A revelation.

Yes, I feel the same about cabbage. Pile of watery yellow mush? No thanks. But I love sticky red cabbage when still a bit al dente. So much boils down to (pun unintended) how it’s cooked. My nan’s Christmas dinner is all over cooked and looks a bit sorry and definitely not appetising but my mum’s looks and is delicious.

isthismylifenow · 10/12/2023 17:31

Chilicabbage · 10/12/2023 17:10

Yup. Pretty sure many people living in other countries have a"god no" Christmas food list too. Like Slovak soup with sauerkraut, czech fish soup, borsch in Poland and others, carp in central Europe and so on.

There si a list every year of worst foods around the world. It's interesting one!

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I need to have a look for that thread.

But yes this is very true. I will weigh in here with just one off the top of my head.

It's called a skilpadtjie. The direct translation is 'little tortoise'. They are sold in the butchery section and are cooked on a BBQ which is a popular choice here on Christmas Day. It is not a tortoise though, although it does look a bit suspect it you didn't know any different. I see how it got its name.

It's a lambs liver and it's wrapped in a layer of kidney lining.

😄

Chilicabbage · 10/12/2023 17:44

It's not a thread @isthismylifenow https://twitter.com/TasteAtlas/status/1621601683112329216?t=BTs3y4A57XsTvFHM72l9zw&s=19

They also do best dish, best cuisine etc.

Yours mentioned sounds to me like if Stephen King tried his hand in cooking😂

Itisyourturntowashthebath · 10/12/2023 17:45

Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g · 09/12/2023 18:50

Not that recent. Arrived in the UK in the 1420s. Started supplanting the goose in the 19th century, I think, possibly because they're easier/cheaper to rear, or bigger.

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1420's Wow those feckers can fly well.
Columbus didn't get there until 1492.

CuteOrangeElephant · 10/12/2023 17:48

I have not read the entire thread so sorry if it's already been mentioned.

Sprouts. Why why why. They are rarely cooked well either.

In my country it's considered a hearty midwinter meal of the peasant variety.

Chilicabbage · 10/12/2023 17:51

So much boils down to (pun unintended) how it’s cooked.

I had colleague who cooks veg for roasts in pressure cooker. As lovely as she is, that horrified me😶

WhatWouldJeevesDo · 10/12/2023 17:52

“In my country it's considered a hearty midwinter meal of the peasant variety.”
What is @CuteOrangeElephant?

CuteOrangeElephant · 10/12/2023 17:56

WhatWouldJeevesDo · 10/12/2023 17:52

“In my country it's considered a hearty midwinter meal of the peasant variety.”
What is @CuteOrangeElephant?

Sprouts! They are not seen as a festive food at all.

What I find weird about Christmas in Britain is the collective menu. Everyone seems to be doing the same kind of dinner with maybe some variation in sides? In the Netherlands every family just does their own thing.

isthismylifenow · 10/12/2023 17:57

Chilicabbage · 10/12/2023 17:44

It's not a thread @isthismylifenow https://twitter.com/TasteAtlas/status/1621601683112329216?t=BTs3y4A57XsTvFHM72l9zw&s=19

They also do best dish, best cuisine etc.

Yours mentioned sounds to me like if Stephen King tried his hand in cooking😂

Thank you for linking this. I had a good laugh.

How did tuna casserole get on there 😂 in almost every other US TV show there is someone making one.

And if anyone Scottish could explain a deep fried pizza to me please .... What happens to the cheese?

The skilpadjies also go by other names depending on their size:
Muis - mouse
Vlermuis - bat
Pofadder - puff adder snake. This one is more for larger gatherings 😂 it's adder snake sized, more so in width than length though. And this one is sliced once it's cooked.

The tortoise is the most common though. Because the fat crisps when it's cooked, and well, then it looks a bit like a tortoise with the shell.

Maybe it will make the list next time. Almost as bad as fried spider.

Chilicabbage · 10/12/2023 18:01

CuteOrangeElephant · 10/12/2023 17:56

Sprouts! They are not seen as a festive food at all.

What I find weird about Christmas in Britain is the collective menu. Everyone seems to be doing the same kind of dinner with maybe some variation in sides? In the Netherlands every family just does their own thing.

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That's very common. In most (I guess?) places there is traditional food for specific days

Chilicabbage · 10/12/2023 18:02

@isthismylifenow oh my god😂 I love it yet I hate it

ButterCupPie · 10/12/2023 18:05

Chilicabbage · 09/12/2023 15:29

Delicious as they are I find pigs in blankets bit disturbing when you think if the name.
Oi piggy parts, here is a blanket made from your flesh😂

Edited

They don't mind, I have it on good authority.

SwedishEdith · 10/12/2023 18:12

CuteOrangeElephant · 10/12/2023 17:48

I have not read the entire thread so sorry if it's already been mentioned.

Sprouts. Why why why. They are rarely cooked well either.

In my country it's considered a hearty midwinter meal of the peasant variety.

I had a French friend who felt the same way about parsnips. "Urgh, how can you eat them? We feed them to the pigs". And then she had some - honey glazed and roasted and was converted.

I love the feeling on Christmas Day that everyone is sitting down to a similar kind of meal. In the same way, I love that most things genuinely shut down - shops, transport etc. Most people getting a genuine day off. It's what makes Christmas stand out from any other celebration.

ButterCupPie · 10/12/2023 18:12

When my English relative who lives in France was over a few weeks ago she spent £40 in M&S on mince pies to take back to, or feed to, French people who love them. She can't stand them.

WhatWouldJeevesDo · 10/12/2023 18:22

CuteOrangeElephant · 10/12/2023 17:56

Sprouts! They are not seen as a festive food at all.

What I find weird about Christmas in Britain is the collective menu. Everyone seems to be doing the same kind of dinner with maybe some variation in sides? In the Netherlands every family just does their own thing.

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It sounded as though sprouts were considered to be a hearty meal in themselves 😀in your homeland.
I suppose they used to be a winter thing and they have gone out of favour but hang on at Christmas.
Yes. Everyone doing the same thing at once is good for the spirit - maybe not all the time but regularly.

Minimum85percentCocoa · 10/12/2023 18:27

Am I misremembering pigs in blankets as a kid in the eighties? (born in 81). Judging by the other things we used to eat I’m pretty sure we weren’t at the cutting edge of culinary fashion… (can’t remember if we called them that but I’m sure we had sausages wrapped in bacon).

Kendodd · 10/12/2023 18:48

You're doing it all wrong op. At Christmas, you eat loads of food you don't like, it's traditional!

CuteOrangeElephant · 10/12/2023 19:04

WhatWouldJeevesDo · 10/12/2023 18:22

It sounded as though sprouts were considered to be a hearty meal in themselves 😀in your homeland.
I suppose they used to be a winter thing and they have gone out of favour but hang on at Christmas.
Yes. Everyone doing the same thing at once is good for the spirit - maybe not all the time but regularly.

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Yeah sprouts is just regular winter food to us, I guess it has not fallen out of fashion for normal dinner like it has in the UK. We eat loads of kale too!

My mom used to make sprouts, covered in puree and cheese from the oven all the time.

Bideshi · 10/12/2023 19:19

BetsyBobbins · 09/12/2023 18:48

To the people saying I had some substandard versions of mince pies, Christmas cakes, puddings: I used to work in the head office of a company whose chairman was a Lord. Not a lot of people working in said office, 40 people tops. Every year we got a small Fortnum & Mason hamper from Lord Chairman with the offending trio in it: mince pies, Christmas pudding and Christmas cake. He was also fond of telling the office manager to put a plate of mince pies (F&M obviously) at reception throughout December.

I don't think the quality of their food can be disputed, can it? I'm sorry, it's just the smells, tastes and textures that are vile to me, it is what it is

It can actually. Fortnum and Mason hampers keep getting gifted here and the stuff is distinctly mediocre. I love mince pies and Christmas cake but I've never had a bought one that I liked. They need to be home-made. I don't understand the cakey texture of bought mince pies. It ought to be made with light buttery crisp pastry.

Titicacacandle · 10/12/2023 19:51

moggerhanger · 10/12/2023 16:18

Please can someone let me know a good recipe for Jamaican rum/black cake? I think I need to try it, it sounds amazing!

Basically there's no real recipe as each family will do it slightly different and most eyeball it rather than measure ingredients. You need Jamaican red wine (it's different than wine wine) and rum. You can either let the fruit stew in rum or wine for months or you can heat it up (not boiling) and blend the heated up prune, raisen and booze mix. Then mix it in cake batter with loads of nutmeg, cinnamon, vanilla, almond essence pimento and I think rose water. When it comes out the oven add rum or wine drizzle over it. I can eyeball it but not explain it! But like any cake if it's not thick enough add a bit more flour and if it's too thick add a bit of milk so it's the right consistency.

Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g · 10/12/2023 19:56

Itisyourturntowashthebath · 10/12/2023 17:45

1420's Wow those feckers can fly well.
Columbus didn't get there until 1492.

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Don't know what I was on when I posted that! Bang to rights there. Maybe the 1520s ...

Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g · 10/12/2023 19:58

moggerhanger · 10/12/2023 16:18

Please can someone let me know a good recipe for Jamaican rum/black cake? I think I need to try it, it sounds amazing!

This is the one I use. No idea how authentic it is, but it's lovely. I make one big cake and I don't bother separating the eggs, just mix in the whole eggs. https://www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/womanshour/food/recipe46.shtml

BBC - Radio 4 Woman's Hour - Mini West Indian Christmas Cakes

recipe for woman's hour

https://www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/womanshour/food/recipe46.shtml

Nonentity2023 · 10/12/2023 20:21

We were definitely eating chipolatas wrapped in bacon with Christmas dinner in the 1960s, we just didn’t call them in blankets then.

I love Christmas cake and mince pies. I hate Christmas pudding and Brussels Sprouts.

WhatWouldJeevesDo · 10/12/2023 20:50

Wikipedia says the first known recipe for pigs in blankets was published in 1957 but they were popularised by Delia in the 1990s. I’ve never had them on Christmas Day. I don’t think I’d come across them until the 90s.