What would you put in a box of Christmas Cheer?

[DifficultBloodyWoman]

I have a relative who is a bit of a Grinch. Despite having children, in previous years, she either hasn’t bothered to put up a tree or does it on Christmas Eve. There are no special traditions or special food etc. The day is spent mostly on iPads and in bed. The kids split Christmas between her and their Dad.

I want to send a box of Christmas goodies to get them in the spirit of Christmas. The kids are 7, 10, and 13.

So far:
santa hats
a tree to stick on the wall
crackers
a book of Christmas themed stories
Christmassy chocolate and sweets

What would you suggest? (The box has to be posted and I want everything to arrive at the same time so I’m not going to order things to be delivered directly to them).

It's for her children, not her. Why should they miss out?

A bunting craft set or paper chains.

What about getting some festive card games. You can get snap cards, festive jokes, and little xmassy games they can play just the 3 of them if mum doesn’t want to join in. The Works are great for things like that.

also, what about some make your own cracker sets? They’re £3 for 6 crackers that the kids can make themselves. They’re real easy to do and you could include something little to go in them. They come with hat, snap and a joke. I added in a party popper and a flick a chicken to ours (google it for the best description lol)

You could also add some Xmas chocs like quality street or roses too. They always feel xmassy to me.

You could do a list of your top 10 Xmas films and challenge them to watch them all? Decorate the list for it. Maybe get a Christmas blanket that they can all snuggle under on the sofa to watch them.

I think what you’re doing is a great idea.

Not honestly sure this is a good idea as I can be like the mum at times as Christmas is a struggle for me. So to survive it I have to keep things simple.

If you are still after ideas Christmas jigsaw puzzle and a Wintery themed book each (even I do that stuff). They can do all of that themselves no input from mum required.

Have you ever thought that putting the tree up on Christmas Eve is their Christmas tradition so they don't do exactly the same at your sister's as they do at their dads?
Nothing gives you the right to tell anyone how they should celebrate Christmas.
You say you're DN 13 often steps in to do stuff so if a tree and paper chains were that important to him he'd do them.
I suffer from severe depression and if anyone did what you're planning on doing when I was in a really bad place it would have sent me spiralling.
Please speak to your DS first

I'd send a nice smelling christmas candle to make the house smell christmassy, a pretty light up decoration as fairy lights always make you feel cosy, a really nice Christmas book and maybe a tartan throw.

I got a really nice three wick Christmas candle from H&M this year called 'winter spices' It comes in a beautiful red box.

I second fairy lights, Christmas crafts to make decorations for the house, even a simple one like making paper chains, window stickers, a sign “Santa stop here” or a few for each child, Christmassy socks, advent calendars, some chocolates or hot chocolates bombs, gingerbread making kit, maybe a book or Christmas theme puzzle (depends on DC).
Home bargains has a lot of interesting things and cheap.
Will DC have a Christmas jumper day at school? They might need something for this e.g Santa hat or at least some hair decorations for girls.
It’s a great idea OP, you are such a lovely aunt. I’m sure your sister will appreciate it later. You just spoil your nephews and nieces a bit - nothing wrong with that.

Christmas isn't bloody obligatory! No one should be forced into celebrating a fake, capitalist, Christian holiday.

It is extremely inappropriate to send Christmas stuff to a family that don't celebrate it.

yeah let mother shit on hers kids' christmas. what do they matter anyway?

Its none of anyone's business if or how other people celebrate Christmas. Utterly baffling and completely inappropriate.

Gosh I’d be so upset if someone sent my children a gift to ‘save’ them from how awful and incorrectly I celebrated a holiday. It’s such a pointed gift. Assuming she’s a good mum the entire rest of the year it just seems unnecessary.
Offer to take them on a day out if you’re close, if you’re not you shouldn’t interfere.

the mother's behaviour? I agree. Baffling and inappropriate that she doesn't make any effort for her kids at Christmas.

Who gives a fuck, her kids need something to celebrate with!

Aldi do Xmas tortilla chips every year.

This made me so sad. I love Christmas. I do all the traditions and get super excited. I do feel sad for the children as they will know they are missing out if they have Christmas at their dads and if they miss how it was before he left. The least the mother could do would be to try and make it less painful for them. Even if I was on the verge of suicide I would drag myself out of that bed and paint a smile on my face for the children I decided to bring into this world! No one is expecting her to decorate the full house and dance around the Christmas tree in matching pjs, but watching an Xmas movie and letting them have a tree in their room etc isn’t exactly hard work! It’s not like they are not celebrating due to religious reasons either - this is something they used to do and now don’t, with no explanation, which is completely different! You sound like a lovely Aunty and this must be hard for you not being able to be there for them and knowing your sister is not going to change. I think your doing well by not having it out with her to be honest! She should probably just let them go to their Dads on Xmas eve and just explain she does not celebrate Christmas for X Y Z reasons. She obviously needs therapy!

The Works have some great cheap stuff to do and make for the Christmas season

I would suggest you mid your business.

FFS! I just read all of your comments @DifficultBloodyWoman and frankly, this is where the saying "you can't choose your family" comes from. You are clearly doing this as a way to show off how much better you are than your relative no doubt to your family and, as demonstrated here, anyone else you can inform about your 'good deed'. I don't know where this perceived (by you) competition came from but you're not fooling anyone with your proclamations of how superior your Christmas spirit is compared to your relative. You know, your relative who has gone through the breakdown of her marriage and everything that entails, the one you're childishly name calling and denigrating? You're not doing this for her or her children, you're doing it to prove how much better you are than her. I suspect you have even thought (or possibly said) that you'd 'be a better mum to those kids'. I notice that you made sure to point out how much money you are spending ( yes, the humble brag about how the main presents being more than £100 was obvious). I'll say it again, mind your own business - it shouldn't be hard since self seeking clearly comes easily to you.

I think you should respect your sister's preference.

This post just seems sort of wrong - are you implying that a parent who doesn’t have a massive commercialised Christmas and follow along with social media nonsense like the elf and Christmas pyjamas are somehow bad parents?!

I ld find this very overbearing, someone else foisting their version of tatty Christmas cheer onto my house. Maybe they are content to celebrate it their own way.

To those who have offered helpful suggestions - thank you very much. I appreciate your input and creativity.

To those who are projecting their own experiences on me and my sister - she is my sister, we grew up together, I know her, I know what she likes and dislikes about Christmas, I know what she used to do for Christmas and what she does and doesn’t do now, I know how and why she is divorced, I know how it has affected her, I know her kids, and I know how all of this has effected them. Please consider that I might know and understand her better than you, a stranger on the internet, who read a random post and replied without actually answering the question I asked.

To the trolls - wow, I seem to have pushed a lot of buttons with this! I wish you all a very Merry Christmas with children on sugar highs, endless unstoppable caroling, and Elf on loop. Happy Holidays!

The kids are excited at the thought of opening the parcel next week. They have had fun guessing what I might have included but I haven’t actually told the, because I want they to enjoy the anticipation. My sister is neither grateful nor resentful of it. She is concerned that I may have included glitter (I haven’t). I’ve had fun putting package together and decorated the inside of the box in a similar way to this
www.etsy.com/listing/1585191517/care-package-printable-college-care?etsrc=sdt&epik=dj0yJnU9aGlnWEpON1YycEVjNk1pS2lIV0ZLN05qZTZ1dk1Ob3kmcD0wJm49M0I5Ni1MZVE5WEZwNUx6M3FaeGRVUSZ0PUFBQUFBR1ZpdzA0
I should be presenting Blue Peter any day now.

I have included advent calendars, a gingerbread house activity crafty thing, Christmas chocolate galore, Christmas cards, a list of my favorite Christmas films on Netflix, popcorn, two very mini trees for the kids’ bedrooms with decorations (including fairy lights), crackers, a hot chocolate kit, and Christmas jumpers.

How about a Xmas radio times? Not sure when it's out, or whether you've posted your parcel yet, but my kids loved selecting what they wanted to watch!

Did you even read the OP’s original post? She’s not sending it to a family who don’t celebrate Christmas. She’s sending it to three children who very much do celebrate Christmas. Three children who grew up in a house where their parents also very much celebrated Christmas until their marriage ended. And then, all of a sudden, at the age where it should still be magical and exciting for them, Christmas became a non event. Can you really not imagine how those children would feel, just for a moment? How sad and upset they might be that, suddenly everything in their little lives has just been turned upside down by their parents divorce, and on top of that, Christmas was cancelled? And yes, it’s shit for the OP’s sister. Of course it is. But if she can’t pull it together to try and keep some normality in her children’s lives, then she should be bloody grateful that someone else is trying to.

@BerfyTigot I think that is a brilliant idea but they don’t come out for weeks yet. We get one every year, I think it might even be as late as 7-10 days before.