How many gifts per child?

[Smarshian]

I am just starting writing out my lists for the kids.
so far I have a Xmas Eve box each (I know these aren’t universally loved!) with hot choc, new pjs, a mug, a bath bomb and a book. Total cost £10 each.
then stockings with sweets, fidget spinners, small toy (Gu jitzu dinosaur for him, uno for her), oodies (fake £10 ones), selection box and cans of pop. Total cost approx £25-30 each.
then under the tree maybe 4 gifts each. The cost will be quite different for these I imagine as he doesn’t want much and she is after a switch, so will get that and 3 very small other gifts, he might get 2-3 medium gifts and 1-2 smaller.
what is everyone else doing?

So they actually get 13 presents each- not one.

I made it clear - one present, plus stocking fillers. Nothing has changed. Stocking fillers are always wrapped.

The stocking fillers are things like hair slides, socks, sweets (when they were little), mascara, (when they were teens). All wrapped up individually. Just little things. There’s only one “present”.

I definitely go a little overboard but try to rein it in. From me I do broadly follow the something you want (requested, usually the "main" gift like a bike or tablet), something you need, something to wear, something to read principle. But add a couple of larger surprises to this. The children then get a stocking each with maybe 15 presents in. Stockings are small gifts but proper ones though, not just sweets or a bouncy ball etc. Things they will love, not just bought for the sake of it to fill it up. They also get gifts from family. I think that is plenty and they are always very happy.

I think I tend to give them a lot because I had an abusive mother who sometimes gave me a stocking with coal in it while my siblings were given stockings full of presents, because I was "bad". In fact, I had undiagnosed autism and ADHD. So there is no linking here of behaviour to Christmas presents, no elf.

Why does it matter what other people do? Everyone has their own traditions. For me, the magic of many things to open at Christmas is very special for small children. That magic lasts only a fee years, that excitement. I know how it felt not to have that. But I am not remotely bothered if other people celebrate differently.

You said ONE present and made that look really matter of fact

then added
well maybe two

• gifts from sibling
• 10 wrapped gifts in a stocking

You made yourself look a bit silly honestly and that kind of mumsnet race to be the least dishonesty is why these threads dont work.

no idea why it came out as bulletpoints like that it was meant to say

then you added:
well actually maybe two
PLUS gifts from sibling
PLUS 10 wrapped gifts in a stocking

@Greytea you say "one main" present but does that mean literally one object? Or would you add extras. For example a Barbie Doll plus extras of some outfits. Is that (in your mind) one present or several?

The fact that people can’t read and understand what I said isn’t my problem. If people want to buy stacks of stuff for their DC, I don’t care. I wouldn’t do it. It’s certainly not a race to the bottom. I think it’s a journey to the top. If people think that hair slides for a toddler that I wrapped for their stocking means I’m being dishonest, so be it. I, as an adult, wouldn’t count hair slides as a present. A three-year-old would, hence their excitement on Christmas Day to unwrap some in a stocking. And everyone surely buys a small present for their child to give to their sibling on Christmas Day, just as your child also “buys” or makes a present for their parents etc. That’s normal.
If people are adding filler stocking presents to their total of gifts that their child gets, that should be made clear. So, those who said they get four, or seven etc gifts for their child, that also includes small stocking fillers? Or are they being dishonest too?

I think it is the opening of many gifts that excites children, as much as what they contain. So it's not necessary to spend a fortune, but I do find it sad when people say they don't wrap stocking presents. That would make the excitement so much less IMO.

It's funny how what is classed as a present is being called into question now that things have got a bit interesting.

My kids get plenty to unwrap, it takes all morning as is so if we wrapped everything the whole day would be spent unwrapping instead of playing.

Theres zero reason to wrap stickers, a pen, a mug, a chocolate bar etc... that they get in their stocking aswell.

@mam0918 yeah as I said, I put more substantial things than that in stockings, so they do get wrapped. There is something magical about the rustle of a stocking full of wrapped presents. My children love it. Each to their own.

Aaaahhh, well now you put it like that, my DCs only get 1 present each then too. This year they are getting a bike each. The other wrapped items under the tree and their stockings aren't presents as I don't count books, treats, toys or anything else I have bought and transferred ownership of on Xmas day as gifts either 👍🏻 I'm not sure how to describe these assorted items that I choose to pass over for no payment or exchange of services though - can anyone help me with the correct term?

😂😂😂😂😂

That’s more then one present then isn’t it 😂😂😂😂

Nearly finished for the kids. I’ve never counted presents but try to match to an even amount so piles look the same !

From us-
DD1 - iPad, Apple pen , squishmellow

Santa -
popcorn maker
waffle maker
squishmellow
Posca pens
art & craft supplies
slime
braclet making set
journal
light box
joke toys
fidget box
Tom gates books
Buzz wire
squishmellow duvet set
lego set

stocking - slime ball, pringles , shower stuff

DD2

from us - tablet, lol headphones, lol omg doll

Santa
playdough ice cream cart
gooey Louie game
Microphone
arts & crafts things
squishmellow duvet set
playmobile dentist set
playmobile swimming pool
LCD writing pad
squishies
Magna tiles
lol make up
space hopper
lol watch

stocking - lol balls , lol lipgloss , lol nail polish , slime ball, choc coins

I do Christmas Eve boxes but re-use a lot every year!
christmas books
santa sack
Santa cup and plate ( for milk & cookies )
reindeer food ( we make on Christmas Eve)
new pjs
toothbrush & tooth paste
socks & pants
one arts & crafts activity
one small toy - beanie baby or lol ball
hot choc
choc Santa

I for one have never bought gift for my kids gifts to give each other, thats wierd.

I mean I would understand if you give the kid money and they pick and buy for each other (but honestly we have never done that, given the age gaps we have it wouldn't make any sense to do that) but whats the point of you buying a gift then saying its from them?

Also most young kids have no ability not to just instantly tell each other, I mean is that why you buy it? so are they are suprised by the gift they are giving as the reciever is recieving it?

But you mentioned sticking gifts such as marble run in stockings, thats not just a tiny insignificant present, you also said the stocking being a foot long. Not everyone has/had stockings, I never had any growing up, so any present, regardless of size was put under the tree. So one “main” present plus what ever was wrapped in the stocking would in my books be multiple presents. Same with sibling presents. I’ve started to give my DDs gifts or let them pick gifts from each other, but ultimately they come from us in the grand scale of things as we pay from them, therefore I’d count them in the number of gifts my DDs get from us.

I really don’t understand how you don’t count “filler stocking presents” as presents from you…

I think it's nice to get presents to and from siblings, we will be starting that this year now they are a little bit bigger :)

I do stockings now for my kids but also didnt have them as a kid neither did DH or many other posters on mumsnet.

We also shock horror didnt grow up with wrapped gifts (they where out on the sofa ready to play with) but they where still gifts wrapped or not, stocking or not, tree or not.

I referred to “wrapped” presents because greytea said they wrapped presents such as hair clips and mascara. I had plenty of unwrapped presents and so have my DCs. Wrapped or not, they are still presents and I would count them as coming from us regardless of size or value.

I don't know anyone who didn't have a stocking (mums old tights, long white school sock, dads football sock) of some sorts in the 80s.
Admittedly they took a whole lot less filling than today's purpose made Stockings.
But hanging them up was still part of the Christmas Eve ritual along with milk for Santa.

Sorry the wrapped thing wasn't aimed at you just a general comment on gifts being gifts regardless of how they are presented.

👍