Do you think Christmas as an event as had its day & will it look very different in 5 or 10 years?

[NalPolishRemover]

Reading through MN over the past few days it's struck me how many threads are so negative about Christmas, too much work, too much stress, spending time with people you don't like, hating the gifts you've received, hating buying gifts, hating the traditional foods, taking decorations down on boxing day, erasing all signs of Christmas as soon as possible, not doing Santa, or if doing Santa doing it as minimally as possible etc etc

It got me thinking, most of us have sort of trundled from one year to the next doing what we've always done in terms of our own family culture/ tradition but covid has disrupted everything. It's broken lots of cycles for people. Do you think it's perhaps started a decline in Christmas and over the next 5 - 10 years Christmas will no longer be recognizable?

Given how much everyone was (claiming to be ) longing for their traditional family Christmas gatherings last year, I thought this year the boards would be full of happiness & joy but they seem overwhelmed by frustration.& disappointment instead.

Maybe Christmas is actually over?

There needs to be a new festival, that also falls on the 25th December, but celebrates Humanitarianism. A day of Winter mindfulness perhaps.

I think that's pretty much what the original 25 December celebration was. No reason people can't do that for themselves if that's what they want.

I also hate how people blindly do the same thing every year. Without thinking or questioning it.

Some of us actually enjoy it though and look forward to the traditions and the specific events that take place at this time of year.

I also hate that Christmas adverts start in October. It takes over such a huge chunk of the year, and it is so commercialized.

Celebrating Christmas seems to rely a lot on female drudgery..I think as the older generations die off, women will become a lot less willing to put up with this especially once they no longer have an elder generation expecting Christmas with all the bells and whistles.

Don’t think so.
It’s not changed much really from my childhood memories of 30 years ago so I doubt it

@SpinsForGin true. maybe I would enjoy it if I was in my own house.

Having to spend Christmas with people I hate, is what really made me dislike Christmas.

If you are with nice people, I'm sure it is nice.

It is the people that you are with that make the day

If you are with nice people you will like it.

If you are forced to spend the day with people you don't like (parents, inlaws), it is an awful forced day.

Im so glad its over. It was awful

@Comedycook yes at the female drudgery. I felt like a servant on Christmas day.

@Mufasa1118

Question: is anyone here religious?

Christmas is a Christian religious festival celebrating Jesus.

I am sometimes surprised at the popularity of Christmas, when most people are not religious anymore.

Because it's cultural as well as religious.

There are certain events that take place in my village every year. Some are linked to the church and some are linked to the culture and heritage of the area but now they are part of the fabric of where we live. We celebrate them because we enjoy them despite not being particularly religion or originally from the area.

[quote Mufasa1118]@SpinsForGin true. maybe I would enjoy it if I was in my own house.

Having to spend Christmas with people I hate, is what really made me dislike Christmas.

If you are with nice people, I'm sure it is nice.

It is the people that you are with that make the day

If you are with nice people you will like it.

If you are forced to spend the day with people you don't like (parents, inlaws), it is an awful forced day.

Im so glad its over. It was awful[/quote]
Then spend it with people you like 🤷🏼‍♀️

In our household we enjoy celebrating the Jesus sent as saviour element of Christmas as well as all the sparkly extras

I'm not a devout Christian by any means but I think it's sad that the Christian message is being diluted so much. There are so many things in the story which resonate nowadays, perhaps even more than in the past.

If everyone would just go to a carol service (and I mean everyone - there are messages of joy and hope which cross ages, ethnicities and religions) really listen to the words, think about what they mean and act on them maybe this fucked up world would be in a better place.

Just for clarity i am not wishing Christmas away & I'm not bah humbug about it one already said that we had a lovely Christmas & that we celebrate quite traditionally so don't know why some posters are being so offended.

I was simply musing or wondering about how or if Christmas might change if we as a society drop so many of more traditional aspects

There are so many examples of this on the 1st pages of MN threads already today.

So if a majority drift to starting the celebrations from end November to boxing day this becomes the norm for your children who will do similar & so the 12 days aspect dies out in practice

Similarly if we decide cooking the traditional dishes is too much work or not to our modem taste & your children grow up having pizza or steak or Indian take away or whatever - this becomes the blueprint & it's harder to imagine that they will reinstate turkey or goose etc

I'm not saying any of this is wrong. I was idly thinking about it earlier & wondering in my own mind what Christmas will look like to the next generation or the one after

People are more likely to drip online than say about good stuff, a fair amount of peoples gripes could be solved by not being a pushover to be honest. I hope that in the next year people do what rhey want for Christmas and don't feel beholden to do stuff and see people they hate.

@SpinsForGin you said "spend it with people you like!" That is easy for you to say! All of my immediate family are abusive to me. The only way I will be happy in Xmas is if I spend it alone. Which I will next year.

Many of us don't. But we are guilt tripped to go and visit them at Christmas. As Christmas is supposed to be "family time" and we are socially pressured to visit family at this time of year.

I spent Christmas day with my mother and brother. Both of them spent the day shouting at me, ordering me around and using me like a servant.

My good friend just came home from Canada to Ireland to visit her parents on Christmas day. She rang me in tears and said that she was sorry that she visited her parents at all, they were so awful to her.

Look at all the threads on here yesterday of people talking about crying and suffering yesterday, being with their parents or inlaws

I had quite a nice day actually.

However the hype, expectation, fussing and carry on about one day is always the same on here. Anyone who was miserable this year will vow to address it, probably do nothing about it and the same will happen next year, and the year after, and the year after that...

I can only speak for my specific circle but I've definitely seen a move away from big excesses.

My friendship group used to buy each other presents, then we decided that was too much and moved to secret Santa. Then that was still pressure that some didn't want so we stopped presents and just meet for a meal. Then we stopped Christmas cards as we see each other frequently so a card seems a waste of money and resources and just another thing to remember. We still have our annual meal with all of us plus partners, around 15-20 of us in all and we love and cherish that time together.

Most I know have stopped Christmas cards now for all but closest family.

At work this year everyone decided they'd rather make donations to a food bank than get Secret Santa tat.

I wish crackers would die out - totally pointless generators of useless tut.

I think Christmas is what people make of it, but I don't think it will and as an event, maybe just look different. I don't like the amount of 'stuff' that comes with it but would never deprive my own DC just because I'm not bothered about it. I think as long as there's children in the world, Christmas will look similar in a lot of households. I never hold up a high expectation of a day that essentially is a gift giving day because I think it puts pressure on people.
I believe in Jesus birth so Christmas has a different meaning to me than perhaps some family members or friends. I also believe Easter holds a greater importance.
One thing I do miss though - a proper 80s Christmas. Cards that bend and that paper that ripped if someone breathed on it and those flat advent calanders that just had a picture
I do agree though OP, people would never have dared having anything but turkey on Christmas day when I was a child. 😆

a sense of entitlement around gifts that they should be something wanted/useful I mean heavens forbid people don't want useless tat r something they'll never use. Mil brought me books off my wish list. Great. Didn't know I was getting them as I don't expect my gift list to be brought out. Ddad brought me scented candles but I never burn them and they make me sneeze. It's not a cheap present and I've being gracious and said thank you properly etc but it is a waste. I won't use them so they'll get regifted or donated. What a waste of his effort when a brief chat would have offered up plenty of options, even theatre tickets which he could buy online so not making him go to X shop.

@squashyhat I agree. Even in schools it's diluted down.
Sometimes though, the most 'unlikely' people walk into church for a reason, and I always hope they get something out of it.

Look at all the threads on here yesterday of people talking about crying and suffering yesterday, being with their parents or inlaws

But people who are having a nice time don't start threads on here... MN really isn't representative of society as a whole. Everyone I know enjoys Christmas and spending time with family and friends. I adore my in laws and they were a delight to host and I'm really looking forward to seeing my dad tomorrow. I would start a thread about that as (quite rightly) I'd be accused of being smug.

I'm sorry you have had a negative experience but it sounds like you've decided to make changes for next year which is good. As an adult you have the choice about who you spend time with so don't waste your time on people who are horrible to you.

@User2638483 I'm in my 50s & i think it's already changed quite a lot from my childhood & thinking about that this morning & thinking about what we are passing to our dc is what made me think posting this thread

My mother probably sends & receives over 100 cards every year. She takes enormous pride in these cards & displays them all on the dining table. To her it 100% signifies or validates something

When I moved out of home I also wrote & sent cards but over the years this has stopped altogether. I'm not bothered as these cards aren't important to me but it's a huge thing to my mother. She feels sorry for us that we don't get cards!

Christmas dinner was a huge deal growing up & we always went to my grandparents house. It was a v simple turkey & ham meal compared to today's standards but the focus was cramming everyone around the table.

Now there's much more choice & each component is fancier but we don't do big gatherings

So my dc have not grown up with the same set of experiences as I have.

I know lots of these changes are entirely normal & nothing stays the same but I do believe we're changing what signifies Christmas quite quickly in lots of ways

And I'm really enjoying reading everyone's thoughts on It

I think we need to get the consumerism out of Christmas, but this means taking on a huge commercial lobby.

This is interesting,

theconversation.com/has-consumerism-taken-over-christmas-two-marketing-experts-discuss-108618

*wouldn't start a thread

Our plans were scuppered by Covid but actually Christmas Day ended up being pretty nice. We napped, we played, we stayed in our pyjamas and we ordered a curry for dinner which came in less than 45mins and was delicious. We watched a film while we ate and generally agreed that it was a nice way to spend the day. Certainly the last two years with covid/isolation we’ve ordered takeaway as didn’t see the point in cooking just for us four and that’s been ace, never eating a Christmas dinner again now we know that’s an option!

The things we’ve missed have been the other bits and pieces that don’t happen on Christmas Day; seeing extended family on Christmas Eve and Boxing Day, going out for a walk etc.

@Mufasa1118 but what you’re describing is nothing to do with Christmas, you’re talking about nasty, abusive relatives. Likewise all those threads you refer to about people crying and suffering. That crap isn’t a special, once a year Christmas thing is it? No, it’s indicative of shitty relationships and in some cases poor boundaries and low self esteem.

I think for some people Christmas may shine a light on how crap their relationships or family dynamics are but it’s certainly not the cause of it. If someone’s parent or OH is a selfish inconsiderate dick at Christmas they’re generally the same on a random Wednesday.