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Christmas

From present ideas to party food, find all your Christmas inspiration here.

Tales of Christmas disasters

74 replies

Pumpkinstace · 21/12/2021 22:27

I'll start.

One year I bought a frozen turkey but didn't realise it had giblets.

They were inside the turkey in a vacuum sealed but of plastic.

I cooked the turkey without removing them and had to bin the part cooked turkey once the smell of melting plastic was noticed.

Oops

OP posts:
GinandGobbledegook · 21/12/2021 22:31

DH doesn't like proper gravy so MIL does him Bisto. One Christmas she accidentally covered his dinner in homemade gravy. He couldn't eat it!

He still won't let her forget it Grin a sunday roast he could have forgiven but Christmas! Shock

JimmyGrimble · 21/12/2021 22:34

One year our cat and dog formed a criminal gang and the cat pushed the turkey off the worktop to where the dog was waiting to receive it. Mum just managed to grab it and burned her hands in the process.
Two years running we ate Christmas dinner at 10 o clock at night because my partner put the oven on grill. I cook now.

APurpleSquirrel · 21/12/2021 22:36

One year our oven broke on Christmas Day whilst we were cooking the turkey. We ended up having to cut it up & cook it in the microwave!

StarryNightSky26 · 21/12/2021 22:36

One year I'd been shopping and hadn't had chance to stash the presents so I left them in the boot of the car. All santa presents.

Totally forgot that night to bring them inside and took dc to football the next morning. Out of the car dc get and go to the boot to get their football - and I didn't even think to stop them 🤦🏻‍♀️

7.5 year old dc saw it all, all their main gifts 🤦🏻‍♀️ We had to give some stuff from mummy and daddy instead of Santa (so no surprise gifts but kept Santa safe) and took others back to exchange for something else and said the boot gifts were donations for a local appeal. It was an absolute nightmare, a few days before Christmas.

Looking back I have some perspective but I was ridiculously upset at the time, I absolutely balled my eyes out over it and felt like I'd ruined Christmas for the dc.

tearinghairout · 21/12/2021 23:08

The dog pulled the remains of the turkey off the kitchen table where it had been put after we'd eaten. We were in the front room and heard a crash - she'd broken DH's grandma's turkey plate in the process! So no leftovers that year (but the dog had turkey for her dinner for days after).

BonnesVacances · 21/12/2021 23:12

A legendary story from DH's family pre me. DH's aunt arrived for Christmas with a homemade Christmas cake. When they went to have a slice it had disappeared. Couldn't be found anywhere. They eventually found it in the dog's basket, I think a few days later. Flat as a pancake and covered in dog hair.Grin

Gingernaut · 21/12/2021 23:17

Mum in her psychotic manic phase was completely disordered so Dad had to buy a turkey, there were no trimmings, everything else was squished to fuck in the pressure cooker and he got blotto drunk as I was trying to roast my first ever turkey. It was grim

AdoraBell · 21/12/2021 23:21

2 years ago, Zoom call, an hour watching FIL eat with his moth open 🤢 I forgot to baste it and turn to oven down. DH carved and said “it’s dry” I just looked at him 😠

Also, about 30 years ago, abusive bf fuckec off to the pub and left me and his sister to cook the dinner. She brought a bottle of vodka and we drank the whole bottle. I have no idea what the food turned out, just remember his face when he returned and I looked after her while she was puking.

This year I’ll prepare the turkey on Christmas Eve and ignore FIL and SIL.

Hope everyone has a good Christmas 🎄🍾

MrsLeclerc · 21/12/2021 23:34

Complete first world problem but my parents booked us on a holiday abroad for Christmas and new year. I was 15 and devastated as I love Christmas. My parents argued pretty much the whole time and as my DB are a lot older I was trapped alone with them. One night we were sat in a bar and DM stormed off after another row. DF sat there drinking and I was worried about DM wandering alone but hesitated too long to safely follow her.

On Christmas morning I had a few tiny presents to open (I think it was Claire’s accessories style bits) as the holiday was my present.

I remember calling my friends from a pay phone to wish them a Merry Christmas and them telling me it was snowing and they were all meeting up to play in it. I sat outside eating a melty Dairy Milk and wishing I was at home.

The main town we were near was aimed at clubbing crowds and I was a very shy teen. I kept getting stopped by rowdy 20 something blokes and felt really intimidated. I was genuinely miserable there.

The only nice memory I have was sitting on our balcony on New Year’s Eve watching fireworks.

SingingSands · 21/12/2021 23:42

This was a disaster, but not for me...

We had Christmas at home instead of travelling to visit family so we had a big family facetime session. We waited until after dinner so we wouldn't be rushing around. My mum was drunk and in her excitement to see us she spilled her entire glass of RED wine on my aunt's cream silk sofa. My brother and cousin were so drunk they fell over laughing and knocked their beers over the other sofa and my SIL jumped up from the beers and dropped her red wine on the cream carpet. It was like a domino effect and something from a bad sitcom!

DH, myself and the kids watched it all open-mouthed on the iPad from 250 miles away. We still talk about it, but not in front of my aunt!

growyourownjam · 21/12/2021 23:49

One year my parents left the price stickers on my Christmas presents. It kind of killed the joy for me.

FruityPolos · 21/12/2021 23:49

When I was a child our cat did a poo behind the Christmas tree, which was in the corner. It was a real tree so moving it would have knocked off loads of pine needles as well as decorations. I remember my dad laying on the floor reaching round the tree to clean it up.

HideousKinky · 21/12/2021 23:56

The ceiling collapsed on the beautifully laid dining table

HideousKinky · 21/12/2021 23:56

No-one was hurt - we hadn't sat down yet

slavetothekittens · 22/12/2021 07:04

Was dishing up the Xmas dinner, all going well, when one of my cats got over excited at the smell of one of his favourite treats ( mashed potato, he loved potatoes) and jumped up on the table, landing slap bang in the middle of my plate....cue a very bemused cat and yes, he got his dish of potato and gravy after he'd had his paws wiped. Xmas Grin

00100001 · 22/12/2021 07:26

@GinandGobbledegook

DH doesn't like proper gravy so MIL does him Bisto. One Christmas she accidentally covered his dinner in homemade gravy. He couldn't eat it!

He still won't let her forget it Grin a sunday roast he could have forgiven but Christmas! Shock

Why is anyone putting gravy on someone else's dinner...??
Lovelydovey · 22/12/2021 07:28

The year we went to Scotland and forgot the presents.

This year where child with covid has cancelled our Caribbean holiday.

DrSbaitso · 22/12/2021 07:33

@HideousKinky

The ceiling collapsed on the beautifully laid dining table
What??
ArblemarzipanTFruitcake · 22/12/2021 07:39

Not really a disaster but my dad once mistook the stock I'd simmered for hours on Christmas Eve as waste and chucked it down the sink on Christmas morning.

I managed to make some more out of what I could cobble together but it wasn't very flavoursome

SmolCat · 22/12/2021 08:00

Why is anyone putting gravy on someone else's dinner...??
Exactly what I thought!

babycornrock · 22/12/2021 08:30

One memorable Christmas, my sister was making her 'famous' gravy, we all waited in anticipation and poured it generously all over our lunch, except for my dad.

Unfortunately for us, she had 'washed' the gravy boat prior to the gravy making. However she had forgotten to actually rinse it, meaning that there was a ratio of about 1:5 washing up liquid to gravy all over Christmas dinner... nobody realised until bubbles appeared and everything tasted distinctly soapy. Oh how my dad laughed as he got on with eating his, whilst we had to forage for frozen ready meals instead...

JuneOsborne · 22/12/2021 08:38

Ours is terrible!

My sister hates washing up. So she bought those foil trays to cook everything in. We had a waist height oven. She'd put the oil in the foil trays to heat up for the roast potatoes. She got them out and hadn't realised how light they'd be and tipped all of the hot fat all over herself. She was wearing a lace dress that melted instantly into her skin.

We spent the day in A&E. My mum spent the day cleaning up the oil from the kitchen floor while my demented grandmother kept asking where we were.

My sister still has the massive scars on her boob's.

We don't buy those foil trays. In fact, we don't have Christmas dinner on Christmas day any more.

I also spent another Christmas in hospital as my mum had a huge surgery on Christmas Eve.

I also spent another Christmas with a very poorly child. Tonsillitis like I've never seen. He vomited all over his breakfast, couldn't open any presents. The walk in GP was amazing though. That was the year my bil got food poisoning because the turkey was under cooked (I turned the oven off when I went to the walk in).

Christmas is a fragile thing in our house.

Toplowlight · 22/12/2021 09:58

When I was 16 my entire family except me came down with some kind of sickness bug on the 23rd. You know the kind - simultaneous eruptions from both ends, absolute inability to keep anything down, weak, miserable beyond words. My siblings were 12 and 17, and my parents were too ill to care for them at all. I spent three days cleaning up vomit (and worse), laundering sheets, encouraging sips of water, making dry toast, bleaching bathrooms. Everyone eventually recovered and we had ‘Christmas’ on New Year’s Eve.

To this day I do not know how I managed to avoid whatever it was!

PegasusReturns · 22/12/2021 10:04

Why is anyone putting gravy on someone else's dinner...??

Exactly what I thought!

Me too - most bizarre thing about this thread unless I’ve misunderstood abs DH was 5

BiddyPop · 22/12/2021 10:23

Our village has 2 power lines - the main one covers the village, and the other one goes to an industrial area but also covers some houses on the outskirts on that side. The main one comes from the local power plant, the industrial from a separate power plant a distance away. (I think the industry itself actually has a link to the village one too as a backup...).

Anyway, the local power plant had an unexpected shutdown on Christmas Day about 20 years ago. Having lived through the 80s and frequent power outages, my DPs had a cooker powered on a gas bottle as a spare. And they had already done up the kitchen so had an electric cooker with 2 ovens for everyday use. So that day, as we had power, DM cooked 4 turkeys, (1 had to be chopped up to fit in the smallest oven) - 3 of them being for neighbours with no power from other parts of the village. I think she also sent them all home with a few roast potatoes each as well, and steamed veg to 2 (the 3rd had camping gear so could cook on a ring, just not an oven).

Luckily, we only ever ate in the evening anyway so our turkey went in at lunchtime once the neighbours had left from the annual mid-morning post-mass drinks gathering (oven was needed for "nibbles" for those guests before then!). But it was a later than usual finish to that gathering so cooking could finish (as the men tended to drive, a few ladies were rather less able than usual to finish off their preps once home, both due to more drinks than usual and no soakage as turkeys took precedence over nibbles for oven space - we did hear 1 teenage daughter put her DM to bed and finished it herself Xmas Grin ), and we ate much later than usual.

There was also the year that DSiblings opened the turkey to put into the oven, which had been kept on the counter in the cold back porch, and realised it was not edible. The mad thing is, as DM had taken our old fridge-freezer off us as a beer fridge, she had tonnes of fridge space even with the annual "Christmas Fridge" going on in her everyday fridge in the kitchen. Our old fridge had a broken handle but was otherwise perfectly functional, and we had replaced it when upgrading to a larger model - and she literally filled it with so much beer and wine that people were never going to drink, and left the turkey on the counter beside it in a "cool room" for 2 days - but probably still about 15 degrees compared to 20+ in the rest of the house, so it was totally totally off! She wasn't told for another few hours, by which time the turkey was in the food bin, BBQ coals were lit and ready to cook on, enough steak for everyone had been thawed from the freezer and DSibs had plied her with wine...