What to buy a 93 year old woman with dementia

[thepastisanothercountry]

MIL.

Over time have got her dressing gown, slippers, gloves, scarves, nice toiletries an Alexa. She's likes / uses them all (though not quite sure she knows who they came from but that's not the point). They don't need replacing.

Books, jigsaws etc. are not a great plan for obvious reasons... she forgets she's read them or gets frustrated. If we buy her food she binge eats because she forgot she's eaten already.

She's got all the home furnishings etc. she needs, piles and piles of stationery.

I'm at a complete blank (weirdly if don't get her anything she will remember. If she does not like it she will keep talking about the fact I got her something she does not like and if she DOES like it she will keep saying "look what DSIL got me". Normally she likes it but I honestly do not know this time.

I’ve heard nothing but good things about these sweets, they are designed for dementia patients.

www.jellydrops.com/

We used to use a whiteboard for my grandmother and would write a note on when we left so she could read it again. Not a great gift but she liked it and it was useful. Also I did a framed collage of family photos for her room in the care home as she had so many photos but not a lot of space.

We're making a large photo album/scrapbook with photos of DM and family, photos of films and places she loved, hobbies and recipes she liked to make. Plus her favourite perfume and a fiddle muff so she has something to fiddle with her hands.

Dementia cat- its a robot furry cat that reacts, moves, purrs, very soothing.

Music she loves all loaded on a player with speaker.

Diffusers, especially if in a care home.

My nan is 93 and also has dementia. We’ve got a nice framed photo of her great grandchildren visiting Santa, a box of her favourite chocolates and a pillow from snappy snaps which has a photo of her and my dad who passed away this year x

The dementia gift websites have a photo album with a short recordable message facility on each page so you can record who the people are in the photos then they or a carer press the button to hear who they are

I did a family history photo album for my Grandma with pictures right back to her childhood and captions of who/where etc which meant she could talk about things with us and the staff. It’s also a lovely keepsake for me now to look back on.

My nan with dementia loves her photo books of family members and friends. With names and places where pics were took! Brings back memories and starts conversations! We’ve bought her a dementia clock this year.

A memory book of photos, names and family links is always useful.

Add the family tree.

How advanced is her dementia? Not too advanced how about a photo book of old pictures of the area she grew up in?

If it’s more advanced then either a fiddle muff or if she likes animals one of those cats that breath and purr and people can have on their lap and stroke. Lots of people find them very calming.

Soft toy? My MIL has a fox and a seal, she loves cuddling them.

@NecklessMumster

The dementia gift websites have a photo album with a short recordable message facility on each page so you can record who the people are in the photos then they or a carer press the button to hear who they are

This is amazing with recordings too

Do you have a link

When my gran was 90 she said she got given lots of lovely boxes of tissues! Bit random if you ask me but she was thrilled - didn't have dementia though

Following. My gran's is advanced - she doesn't know I'm her granddaughter but somehow knows she loves me!

I'm at a complete loss of what to get her. She doesn't recognise most family members anymore and can't read or really do anything.

One that went well with my mum was a large photo frame with a photo of her and my dad - A5 size so easy to see with older eyes.

Another vote for a digital photo frame here :)

I've bought a book for an elderly family member called The British On Holiday or some such - full of old photos of people in the 1950's & 1960's at holiday camps, playing on the beach, picnics etc. Hopefully she'll like it, fingers crossed.

Twiddle muffs are very good for anyone with more advanced dementia, when they can’t really do anything else, or remember how to work anything, or even remember who family members are.

Pre COVID I used to make them for the local hospital - patients would take them home with them. They’re quick and easy to make from oddments - there’s a pattern online somewhere - Oxford University Hospital plus twiddle muffs should bring it up.

I just wish I’d known about them when my poor mother was still alive.🙁

My dad is 93 with dementia, and I agree it is very hard. I have got him photo coasters with pictures of him/myself/dd, and a DVD of a western (he watches a lot of them these days, as he used to decades ago, and he bizarrely, as people with dementia do, suddenly remembered correctly who had directed one I happened to mention - so I got him that one).

Photo book, perfume that's old fashioned eg yardley, picture of where she grew up framed

Weighted blanket

Moving photo

Dementia clock

Colouring in

Portal

Distance lamp - when you touch it it lights up the other one ( could be scary for dementia though)

Perfume - familiar smells

If you're loaded then a Paro seal

Photo album
Music cd/dvd
Hamper of favourites
Bottle of wine
Flowers
Books
Tea, coffee, biscuits in a nice hamper
A day out somewhere?

I work in the nursing home for people with dementia.
From my observation my residents mainly enjoy the gifts that are food related. Favourite biscuits, chocolate or wine and gin.

My granny loved houseplants and flowers (like those planted up Xmas baskets you can get, which live for a few weeks) and bubble bath.
But the best gift I ever found her was a "Granny's Hometown in Old Photos" kind of book ordered off Amazon. I had never been to her hometown but most of the photos dated from the 1920s when she lived there and it brought back so many vivid childhood memories for her; her parents, her schooldays, the local shops and characters.