Vegetarians invited themselves for Christmas- got beef ordered!

[EdenFlower]

So, my vegetarian relatives and asked if they can join us for Christmas? I have it planned- joint of beef on order, I've perfected my roast potatoes and like them cooked in beef dripping, likewise the yorkshire pudding, my sprout recipe is cooked with pancetta, starter is parma ham and figs...and so on! Grrr! Now everything will need to adapted to be veggie because I'm not doing two versions of everything. It was already adapted to be gluten free for MIL but now two more special diet guests is a push.

Would it be rude to ask them to bring their own veggie options with them- nut roast and vegetarian gravy or whatever it is they eat?

TEMPEH

@Gilly12345 can I come to yours this Christmas?

I'm veggie and wouldn't mind bringing my own food at all.

I'm a vegetarian and in this situation I'd be happy to bring a vegetarian main course. I'd feel it was only polite to offer - as you say, you've planned a meat dinner and the majority of meat eaters would want to eat meat at Christmas).

Compromising on a couple of side dishes would seem reasonable.

Don't go to extra trouble if you'll resent it, Christmas dinner is hard work as it is.

Have never heard of veggies bringing their own food and asking them to do so would be very rude.

It's really not hard to adapt things- potatoes etc in olive oil, take some sprouts out before you add the pancetta etc. Not like you don't have time. I'd far rather do this than have them bring their own food and sit there eating something completely different to everyone else.

@YouJustFoldItIn, I'm afraid I'm firmly in the 'Oh god not bloody goat's cheese' camp. I'll add 'oh god not butternut squash or mushrooms and definitely not risotto' too

I would not expect anything fancy like you suggest, and you mean well but meat eaters occasionally eat "vegetarian food" and think that's what vegetarians like.

I'd much rather take my own food and add anything uncontaminated if there is any or just stay at home.

they'll probably turn up with loads of champagne and a fortnum and mason hamper!

@QuiteQuaint

We'd got some chips and we were all talking about how thet were the tastiest chips we'd ever eaten. I couldnt work out what the flavour was and it was only after we'd eaten them that I realised the flavour was beef dripping

So many meat eaters tell stories like that. There’s no way I wouldn’t know something was cooked in beef dripping, huge difference between that and vegetable oil. So

I accidentally had some wierd tasting chips, and realised they were cooked in beef dripping. Bleugh. It was pretty obvious something was off with them.

OP, if they invited themselves, surely you can come to an arrangement between yourselves. Level up with them that all your food is planned and how can we work round that without making the meal a really big effort for you. In your shoes, I'd propose your guests bring a substantial proportion ready cooked, or you buy something ready made. Your style or not.

@JumperandJacket

Have never heard of veggies bringing their own food and asking them to do so would be very rude.

It's really not hard to adapt things- potatoes etc in olive oil, take some sprouts out before you add the pancetta etc. Not like you don't have time. I'd far rather do this than have them bring their own food and sit there eating something completely different to everyone else.

my MIL did...possibly for another thread

@Stovetopespresso

they'll probably turn up with loads of champagne and a fortnum and mason hamper!

This is my best version

Op makes them feel welcome with nice veggie options, guests bring champagne and chocs

Everyone has a nice time feeling welcome and appreciated

@scottishnames

Everyone Please stop going on about nut roasts. That's NOT what most vegetarians like. Nor do many of us like 'welingtons' - stuff encased in soggy pastry. Pastry doesn't make anything festive; it's just a fatty, stodgy filler.

Vegetarians LIKE vegetables. If you want to add fat - eg to roast potatoes - then a good quality olive oil is - to very many of us - a much greater treat than dripping would be to you. and lighter, and healthier, and more ecological ...

I think this shows that vegetarians are as diverse in their tastes as any other group of people. While I can't stand nut roasts, I love a wellington. The pastry shouldn't be soggy! If the OP is going to provide a vegetarian centrepiece then I would check with the guests to make sure the effort will be appreciated. There are many vegetarian/vegan Christmas alternatives that I happily forgo in favour just enjoying the side dishes.

I think that you can use lack of oven and hob space as a good excuse to ask them nicely if they mind bringing their own.

My mum is vege/pescatarian so we usually just cook a salmon fillet on the gas BBQ outside, and the rest of the sides we all eat the same. Although, we also do the sprouts with pancetta, so have to put a few aside before adding the pancetta. And if we cook the roast potatoes etc in animal fat then we would just make her ones separately the day before and reheat them.

I see you have resolved this already OP, but for what it is worth, I am a veggie and if I invited myself over to someone's for dinner, let alone Christmas dinner, I would not consider them rude if they asked me to bring my own food to be heated at their's.

Either say no or get some stuff from m&s (or similar) already prepared. I wouldn't adapt my food that I wait all year to enjoy, but give them a veggie main and they can have the veggies that don't have any meat products.

This is the Aldi nut roast, Camembert and root veg in it so a bit different. I love nut roast btw as do all the vegetarians in the house….we do only tend to have it on special occasions so not sick of it at all.

@EdenFlower

I didn't say no because it would be rude- and it will be nice to have them there. A bought nut roast and Bisto is not my style, or theirs! I would be embarrassed to serve guests that! My question was would it be rude to ask them to bring their own (which would undoubtedly be home-cooked) with them.

Now that's just ridiculous! 🤣🤦‍♀️ Why on earth do you think it's 'rude' to say no to someone who was...being rude? 🤷‍♀️

If someone has the temerity to invite themselves around for Christmas Day, and expects to not only be fed, but specially catered for, then THEY are the rude parties here!! The reply from me would have been a resounding NOT A CHANCE, accompanied by a raucous laugh!

I'm continually astonished by the lack of backbone on these threads...with posters seemingly unable to stand their ground on even the smallest of things 🤦‍♀️

Stuffed mushrooms, are great , easy to make cut like a piece of meat, Brussels with stilton are amazing, carrots in honey are stunning.

@CovidCorvid

I think it would be ruder to ask them to bring their own Than to buy something to be honest. I know people on my vegi gluten free fb group are raving about the Aldi frozen nut roast which comes in a pack of two portions. Get one of them, do the roast potatoes in oil, do some melon and fig starters and boil a few sprouts on the side. Job done and about 10 mins more effort.

Or make a nut roast the night before and leave it uncooked in a loaf tin over night and then just cook on the day.

Oh for heaven’s sake, “Make a nut roast the night before”… like this poor woman has time on Christmas Eve to spend an extra hour to two making a nut roast in addition to the rest of the Christmas meal for people who have invited themselves over and won’t eat what’s already on the menu??

OP I think it is perfectly fine to either buy something from the shop or ask them to bring their own main. At 6 weeks’ notice you can adapt the rest without too much hassle. Just explain you’ve ordered the roast already and ask if they’d prefer for you to buy a nut roast or if they’d prefer bring their own vegetarian main. That way you have played good hostess and offered to accommodate their diet, but they have the option to bring their own (presumably better?) food without seeming rude.

I just want a plate of food that is mostly veg and a bit of protein.
Roast spuds etc are a treat, but I wouldn't want ones cooked in dripping

Christmas day there's usually loads to eat anyway so no biggie, but it is rubbish eating out when you are only offered the same old things that aren't very nice

[quote ILoveShula]@YouJustFoldItIn, I'm afraid I'm firmly in the 'Oh god not bloody goat's cheese' camp. I'll add 'oh god not butternut squash or mushrooms and definitely not risotto' too

I would not expect anything fancy like you suggest, and you mean well but meat eaters occasionally eat "vegetarian food" and think that's what vegetarians like.

I'd much rather take my own food and add anything uncontaminated if there is any or just stay at home.[/quote]
So what would your own food be?

@dotsandco because one day that could be you, feeling at a loose end and Christmas and asking for love and friendship?

@EdenFlower, I usually just have what I normally have for lunch but usually make sure there's a sprout or two.

I usually spend Christmas alone as I don't really think my presence will enhance anyone's christmas. It's great. Nice lunch, presents, g&t with the Queen's Speech and no sodding "vegetarian food"

This thread has it all: laughing at beefy chips makes you a cunt, pasta on your Christmas plate, “is it the Middle Ages”, Bisto gravy is a Pot Noodle, hangry vegans. I’m settling in.

@PurpleDaisies

My question was would it be rude to ask them to bring their own (which would undoubtedly be home-cooked) with them.

Yes. It would be.

I think it would be rude if you'd invited them, but definitely not rude in this situation as they invited themselves.

Trex makes THE most amazing roast potatoes and Yorkshires. Easy to make everything but the beef vegetarian, so not sure why it's such a big deal. Richmond vegan sausages go down well in our house with the carnivores.
You can make a nut roast ahead of time and freeze if you don't want to buy one.
A lot of shop bought puff pastry is vegan, you could make a mushroom Wellington very quickly and easily.

I would say not rude at all to ask them to bring a substitute for themselves to certain bits of the meal. If you know someone well enough to have them for Christmas lunch then you know them well enough to ask. We're a veggie house, I host Christmas my DM brings meat and gravy for herself and DB no big deal everyone gets what they want and we get to be together.