Tips for a relaxing Christmas

[CactusLemonSpice]

I really want to relax and enjoy the day with the kids (baby, 2 and 9), but I also don't want to completely forgoe nice traditions.

As a child I found Christmas stressful as my mum was very overbearing and everything had to be 'just so'.

How do you have a lovely relaxing family Christmas, while still keeping it 'special', and not stressing myself and everyone else out in the process?

On a tight maternity budget so needs to be low cost... can't buy in a ready made dinner etc.

For Christmas dinner I do a Nigella brined turkey because it's so simple. On the day you take it out of the brine, dry it off, shove in the oven for a lot less time than you'd think, and then take it out and tent with foil and a tea towel over the top to rest it. Then you put your roasties and other veg, stuffing, pigs in blankets etc into the oven. Leave the turkey resting for the whole time you're making the rest of your dinner. It will be fine. As long as your potatoes and gravy are piping hot, it's fine if the turkey isn't really hot.

Making Christmas dinner this way removed a lot of the stress for me. I know it's not to everyone's tastes but my family love it this way and it means I don't have to play oven Tetris and panic over timings too much. Much more chilled.

Xmas eve CHANGE THE CLOCKS! . Everyone into the bath, downstairs for chilli dogs, chips and hot chocolate in new pjs. Watch the Snowman, check Santa tracker and off the go to bed (very early!).

Then kick back and enjoy the evening.

Xmas morning we have croissant (defrosted the night before), orange muffins, coffee, oj etc (basic and easy) plus the madness of gifts. At some point I slip away to put the turkey in. I let it rest for as long as it cooks so it frees time for sides etc.

Young kids bring the excitment and they day can streach in my opinion.

Some great ideas on this thread.

Agree you should do what you want not what you think you should do.

If you want a traditional dinner Jamie Oliver has some amazing tips and tricks for what can be done in advance- way more than you think actually.

*Stretch !

Delegate tasks
Wrap presents early
Buy stuff in advance
Cook and prepare accordingly
Involve the older ones
Get cards and other things now

Don't overcommit and create unnecessary work. People seem to be doing/buying more and more for Christmas and I'm not sure any of us enjoy it any more than if we didn't. Also, once you start a tradition like "Elf on the Shelf" or Christmas Eve boxes, you have to carry on or there will be disappointment when you don't, even if it causes stress due to time or finances. My advice: just don't start.

You mentioned a tight budget- Santa in our house is one practical mofo . There is a suspicious overlap between what they need and what they get in stockings- for example he always brings swimmers, goggles, toiletries and some nice stationary.

Lead times: to avoid stress of late changes to wish lists I say that Santa's got lead times and they're longer than usual due to covid- no changes after 30 November.

I think your Christmas will already be much more chilled than your childhood Christmas as you have your eyes open to the fact your mum got stressed about everything being just so. Whatever you do, as long as you are happy to go with the flow and enjoy it as it happens, it will be fun for everyone.

My first suggestion was to ignore it, but you actually want an Xmas so it's a bit different.

Why not do pizza if that's what you want? The baby and 2 year old are not going to be bothered about a Turkey.

Start a tradition that each year a different person picks Xmas dinner.

Or do a buffet that you can all pick at throughout the day.

If you do want to do a roast Iceland do offers that can be cheaper than buying things separately, last year for my birthday my carer cooked a roast dinner for me, he isn't much of a cook but the Iceland roast had instructions and it was fine.

The offer isn't on at the moment but they dochange, I think it was £10 for a roasting joint, roast potatoes, veg and a pudding.

Do have a look, it isn't home made but is edible and much more relaxing than a day iin the kitchen.

Nothing is worse that having to wrap on Xmas eve typo here, noting is better than wrapping on Xmas Eve

A relaxed Christmas comes from not setting unrealistic expectations, choosing things you enjoy and accepting when things don't go 100% to plan.

We do prep early here too, I've nearly finished the shopping and we prep a lot in the run up to the day.

What makes it relaxed in our house though is how much we love it, it's a state of mind.

I will need a coffee and breakfast to get through it, how does anyone manage a breakfast? Prepare some salmon and cream cheese bagels the night before? Or chocolate for breakfast then bagels for lunch?

We prep a continental breakfast, with something like chocolate babka, croissants, posh cereal, juices, fruit. No cooking needed on the day.

I do bacon for breakfast so that everyone can last until the distance. The easiest way is to line a baking tray and cook the bacon for 20 minutes starting with a cold oven. Crispy bacon and no faffing with pans or cleaning up. Pop on some frozen croissants as well and job done.

If you want a turkey cheat, buy a magic roasting bag and put the bird and seasoning inside. It traps all the moisture so you don’t have to keep basting and faffing. Beautiful moist turkey with golden brown skin and minimal effort.

Pour off the juices into a fat separator jug (you can buy these quite cheaply - the spout is at the bottom so when the fat floats to the top you can pour out the juices from underneath), add a spoonful of cornflour to thicken and season to taste and that’s your gravy sorted.

If you have the time to make ahead and freeze you can have all the convenience of bought sides. Line the dish you want to use in the oven and freeze your veg/stuffing/potatoes in it. Once frozen you can retrieve the dish for daily use. On the day just pop it back in, whack in the oven while the turkey rests under a towel. Or you could freeze directly into tinfoil trays too.

I love faffing about in the kitchen on Christmas Day waving rosemary sprigs about but it can be as much or as little work as you want it to be.

I do Xmas dinner at 5 pm as my kids won’t eat a full meal in the middle of the day, but 5pm is early enough to be eaten and cleaned up for a relaxing evening,

My suggestions would be...

Do present buying and card writing early to get it out of the way.

Think about what festive activities you want to do in December, they don't have to be expensive - Christmas movie watching, Carol service, going to see the lights, making Christmas cards/decorations etc.

Christmas Eve box - new PJs for all (not necessarily Christmas themed), Christmas book for bedtime reading, stockings to put out for Santa, sweet treat. Doesn't need to be fancy or expensive. Ours appears just as DC we're getting out of the bath each year to the sound on jingle bells in the distance (musical bell shaker)

On the day, DC bring stockings to our bedroom and they get opened there before we go downstairs.

Coffee for me and DH then about an hour of present opening before breakfast. We have something that can be mostly prepared the day before - baked French toast ready to go in the oven or Nigella muffins with yoghurt and fruit, along with something from a selection box. Buck's Fizz for the grown ups.

The morning is taken up with present opening/playing with/setting up new gadgets, phoning or FaceTiming family to thank them for presents and getting showered and dressed.

If it's just us at home, the Christmas starter (soup usually, made in advance) is had at normal lunchtime. We do the full turkey and trimmings around 4.30/5pm. We prepare as much in advance as possible and have a timeline all prepared. It's fairly relaxed with DH and I taking turns to do different tasks. We might put a Christmas film on during the food prep time, so easy for one of us to duck out for 5 mins to put something in the oven etc. Enjoy Christmas dinner followed by dessert.

There's always a new board game under the tree, which gets played either in the afternoon or after dinner.

Cheese and wine for DH and I once DC are in bed.

Boxing Day at home is always left overs and buffet food. Put out early afternoon and people graze whenever they are hungry.

While I was married I had to spend every Christmas Day and Boxing Day at my Inlaws so Christmas Eve was and still is a special day here. So, now I'm divorced and I can do Christmas at home I don't mind the work really but I still try to minimise the stress on the day.

I agree with getting Christmas presents nice and early, I'll be starting wrapping this week.

I send very few cards but they will be written and stamped ready for posting in November. I get family cards from Moonpig or funky pigeon, it's just easier to personalise and get the right name DC call grandparents etc. one of them will have a good offer in the run up to Christmas.

Ex Inlaws are my distribution point for cards and presents for that side of the family so I don't have to run around delivering. I do gift cards for nieces and nephews on that side I don't see very often.

For stockings, I wrap the presents (except sweets/chocolate) in cheap paper, same roll has lasted years, and keep them in separate bags per person, so on Christmas Eve it takes a couple of minutes to retrieve the stocking, fill it and return it. I also do a dry run to check everything fits.

I've already got a turkey crown in the freezer, it'll be taken out to defrosted on 23rd, put in brine on Christmas Eve and roasted in a bag so no basting. Pigs in blankets are also in the freezer and will come out Christmas morning to defrost. Like others have said the turkey will come out of the oven and be covered and then the roast potatoes etc. go in.

I'm going to par boil and freeze the roast potatoes, parsnips and carrots because that's a faff on the day. The cauliflower cheese will be made Christmas Eve as will the nut roast, stuffing and gravy (turkey juices will be added later). I'm doing pumpkin pie and a trifle for pudding, both will be done Christmas Eve, the pastry for the pie will be done in the next week or so and frozen. Green beans and sprouts will be done in the streamer and finished in the oven at the last minute. Mashed potatoes will be done and kept warm in the instant pot.

If I don't get Christmas Eve off work, dinner gets pushed back to the evening.

Wrap the presents early in December!!
Check you have batteries needed and toys pre made.
I prepare all the veg night before and leave in saucepans.
Lay the table the night before, my dd likes to make place names for everyone and dress the table up, she's 7 so actually keeps her busy on Christmas eve.
Don't have a fancy breakfast, just whatever we normally have, or croissants, something quick.
I don't get stressed about the dinner, it's just a roast dinner!
I had forgot about the Lidl snowman ice creams, kids loved them last year.
I don't make desserts anymore just buy them.

I like to take a day off work in mid December to do all the wrapping while watching a Christmas film.

I did a bbc good food tray bake recipe for all the sides last year, so prepared that and just bunged it in the oven with a turkey joint, ready to serve at 5pm.

We do little stockings in bed, then head downstairs to make coffee/pastries and do the rest of the presents.

This year, I am using (hopefully) reusable gift bags as one thing that stresses DH out is all the mess and waste with wrapping paper. I am also going to have storage boxes/trays to hand, so we don't spend the day looking under the sofa for bits of lego.

I also try to take the pressure off myself - Christmas is not something that I am responsible for gifting to my family. I can get carried away with my love of planning, but sometimes need to let go, and accept that it is a day that just happens as it happens!

Definitely get your husband to take out the kids, ask him to take a day annual leave maybe? It's easier than cramming everything into a weekend day. You then have the time when your older one is at school.

If that doesn't work with the baby maybe do it in 2 stints. I always wrap as soon as DD was in bed, nice glass of wine and carols for me.

We eat early evening. It means the morning is free for nice breakfast, presents, video call to grandparents etc. Smallish lunch and then put the younger ones down for a nap and sit down with the older for a movie or a game but give yourself a break as well.

We often do a Capon, basically a large chicken, nicer than any turkey. But we also did gammon or pork. I keep it a bit simple, normal sides but I like a nice starter and a dessert. The latter can be shop bought.

We have breakfast after the stocking to give it a bit of a break.

If you want to do your own baking I would restrict myself to maybe just one big thing, save the time to bake with the children during December for simple things.

I'm really enjoying this thread. Thanks for everyone's tips.

I've got a silly question about freezing roast potatoes in advance. I do Nigella's roast potatoes usually, how far into her recipe to I go before I freeze them? Or do you just pad boil then freeze then do the rest on the day? 🤔

@FiloFaxx

I'm really enjoying this thread. Thanks for everyone's tips.

I've got a silly question about freezing roast potatoes in advance. I do Nigella's roast potatoes usually, how far into her recipe to I go before I freeze them? Or do you just pad boil then freeze then do the rest on the day? 🤔

I do Nigella's roasties and to be honest I would just make them on the day. I wouldn't freeze them. The important thing about her roasties that makes them so gorgeous is that you're dumping the potatoes straight into searing hot fat. I think frozen potatoes would mess with this process.

According to her website you can peel the potatoes and leave them in water in the fridge overnight, which would save you some time.

@RockingMyFiftiesNot - we have delia Parmesan parsnips. Are yours the same and if so, how do you freeze then please?

Cards written and stamped and presents bought and wrapped by end of November.

Days out planned, booked and paid for before December.

Calendar a day for your big clean in November and do little and often after that.
Similarly, agree a dedicated decoration day. Schedule nothing else, get it done them chill with a Christmas film!

Get your non perishable food and booze in advance and then write a list for your perishables. Supermarkets are mad so this will help. Go early morning.

For Christmas meal, don't feel pressured. If you prefer picky bits and treats then go for it!

[quote polkadotpjs]@RockingMyFiftiesNot - we have delia Parmesan parsnips. Are yours the same and if so, how do you freeze then please?[/quote]
Yes. Once you've parboiled the parsnips and dipped in flour/Parmesan mix, open freeze on baking trays then even frozen out into a box (I separate layers with greaseproof). I let them defrost before cooking.

Personally, I think the trick to a relaxing Christmas is not to have expectations that are too high - in terms of standards, yes, but also in terms of what you want to achieve. I read Christmas magazines and they talk about gorgeous lovely Christmas brunch then a late Christmas lunch and all I can think is that it sounds great, but I'd be exhausted from that much food and cooking and formal eating.

Prep in advance is good, yes, but also, cooking a full roast dinner and making a fancy breakfast is just setting you up to fail. Plus, the chances are that no one will want the huge fancy roast dinner if you've already had a massive and rich brunch. We just buy frozen par-cooked croissants and bake those in the oven while we're opening presents. Christmas "dinner" is at some point between 2 and 4pm and if anyone is hungry they can snack on crisps or the endless christmas snacks lying around the house! I love the idea of a Christmas Day walk but frankly, unless the weather is gorgeous it just feels like another chore so we almost never do it, or I pop out by myself for 40 minutes with the dog.

But I do agree that buying and wrapping presents in advance is a game changer. I used to be quite happy doing my shopping and wrapping in the days before Christmas and couldn't work out why I find it so stressful doing that these days.... until I realised that when it was just me and DH, that was great. But now, trying to do all that (and there are MORE presents, MORE people, MORE shopping than ever before) alongside all the endless tasks of normal family life... it's too much.

@TasteTheMeatNotTheHeat thanks that's really helpful! I get so many compliments about my roasties I don't want to change what I do if I can help it 😂

I've just spent and hour or so while I had the house to myself (annual leave and dc are out) making pastry for the freezer, it still needs turning into pies at Christmas but it's a big step out of the way and a fair bit of washing up done. Making frangipani mince pies one evening after work is much more relaxed if you only have to take pastry out of the freezer in the morning then roll it out. You can buy frozen pastry but it's much more expensive and less satisfying.

I also bought a reduced loaf a few days ago and while I had the food processor out I made breadcrumbs for stuffing and a nut roast. I'm no domestic goddess, just like to be organised. I've got a list on my phone of what I've got in the freezer and in the pantry so I don't double up or forget something.