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Christmas

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Original poster

No Gift Christmas Day

70 replies

ChristmasSnow21 · 13/10/2021 18:01

For the first year ever I’m contemplating a no gift Christmas Day.

Anyone who’s done this or thought of doing this wiling to share with me how their day was without the interspersal of gifts.

Reason for no gifts is children are now adults, but no partners / children of their own, and we are going away for twixmas so that is their gift which they are happy about and want to do.

Just I’m thinking how do I make Christmas just us immediate family with no gifts to open.

OP posts:
Blue4YOU · 13/10/2021 18:07

We did this on my DH’s side last Christmas but with a secret Santa gift. Because of lockdown we did it via Zoom with everyone having a drink and a chat.
It was ok. Probably less awkward than the usual gift giving on that side tbh.
My family are the opposite and so loads of presents etc but it’s probably coming from a big Irish family and Christmas is the one time of year we all try to get together

StCharlotte · 13/10/2021 18:09

Are they going to be with you on the day? If so I'd probably do cheap and cheerful stockings - and make sure someone does one for you - or maybe like a secret Santa for say £10 so everyone gets something to open on the day and it costs very little.

Original poster
ChristmasSnow21 · 13/10/2021 18:18

We are all at home.

We normally have the pile under the tree, and I’m trying really hard not to do that just because I feel I should to make Christmas.

Stocking idea is good. Think secret Santa / one gift may highlight lack of gifts more so.

OP posts:
herecomesthsun · 13/10/2021 18:27

You could plan to give each other a food item which will definitely be liked and consumed and then no item to find space for etc.

It could be a healthy food item that is a bit special eg smoked salmon.

Or homemade eg jam/ lemon curd.

Or you could give a charitable gift eg

Oxfam

Or just tell them you love them x

Mammyloveswine · 13/10/2021 18:28

I personally think it's a bit miserable...but each ti their own!!

DPotter · 13/10/2021 18:34

We have a Secret Santa type arrangement with a max value of £5. The dafter the gift the better - gives us all something have a laugh over

herecomesthsun · 13/10/2021 18:39

Or alcohol maybe Smile as that is seasonal & not very expensive

ArchangelKitKat · 13/10/2021 18:44

Do your children know that this is going to happen? Could cause upset on the day if there is not much to look forward to opening. Not that you need a big pile of gifts but important that they know it will change on the gift front. I think as long as you all agree.

CloseYourEyesAndSee · 13/10/2021 18:46

How joyless:(

ArchangelKitKat · 13/10/2021 18:48

Or is there something you are not telling us?

Cantstopthewaves · 13/10/2021 18:52

I'd give everyone a token gift. You could get something for the holiday, new beach bag or sunglasses.
You don't need to spend a lot it's just a little bit of excitement on Christmas day in anticipation of your holiday.
I'd feel bad not giving a little something to those I love on Christmas day.

Cantstopthewaves · 13/10/2021 18:53

Or gloves if it's a staycationGrin

ArchangelKitKat · 13/10/2021 18:59

I'm watching this thread whilst watching to Home Alone on film4 Grin. Please leave your 'Kevins' something under the tree.

MrsTerryPratchett · 13/10/2021 19:03

The going away present, is that from everyone to everyone else?

Robin233 · 13/10/2021 19:35

Once our children became adults it was a limit of £10.00 each
The grandchildren will be a long eventually and then you can go mad again.

Original poster
ChristmasSnow21 · 13/10/2021 19:53

We discussed going away for Christmas (which we have done a number of times in the past and had a suitcase full of gifts to open with us)

This time we (particularly the children) have said they want to go away after Christmas, part of that trip will be shopping so I asked if they would like cash to spend and they both said yes.

I haven’t explicitly said no gifts, and haven’t definitely decided if I can do the no gifts yet, because I am in the does appear bit joyless miserable camp.

But then thinking is it worth spending just to have on the day.

Hence starting this thread to see if I could make it work or is it better to have the gifts under the tree.

OP posts:
ArchangelKitKat · 13/10/2021 20:37

It doesn't sound like the kids are interested in Christmas gifts and they just want want cash for their trip. Doesn't sound very festive. Maybe just a practical gift for their trip? gallon of unleaded

1stTimeMama · 13/10/2021 20:41

I couldn't do this. Without the gifts, it's just another day but with a slightly fussier roast dinner. It sound like your children are fussed though, what about your partner?

EdHelpPls · 13/10/2021 21:55

I don't see an issue with changing the focus of the day away from gifts. I have two small kids and one late teen DD and still play down gifts at Xmas. My late teen DD dosent even want any gifts. I'm happy without too.

We play board games, go to the park or a forest walk with a flask of hot chocolate, snuggle up in front of the fire with movies and old home movies from my kids childhood and mine. We dont have many days like that through the year so it's very special to us.

What kind of things do your family enjoy doing together? Everyone could bring a board game, or bring out the old photo albums and home videos and watch together?

TheEvilPea · 13/10/2021 23:13

This sounds really joyless. Sad

Jumpingintochristmas · 14/10/2021 00:25

I would struggle with no gifts to be honest. If giving spending money I would gift it in a box or attached to a balloon etc.

Perhaps tickets to an activity on the trip.. theatre, zoo, boat trip etc?

In our house new pyjamas on Christmas Eve are mandatory for anyone staying over and Father Christmas always leaves a stocking. I would also have a gift for each of my children and exchange a small gift with DH.

Bogeyes · 14/10/2021 05:54

We stopped buying presents a few years ago and it's wonderful. Stress free. The charity shops are full of unwanted rubbish Christmas presents

Bloodybridget · 14/10/2021 06:06

I think it would be fine! Unless you know for sure something that each person would really love to receive, presents for the sake of it are a waste of time and money for adults. If you're giving your DCs money for shopping on holiday, put personalised fake cheques in gift envelopes with a message telling each of them something about them that you especially love.

LuckyLucyLoot · 14/10/2021 06:23

I hate all the unnecessary spending at Xmas but I think having nothing might be a bit miserable.
We do Secret Santa with DH's family and with my family we just play the raffle game:
Ask everyone to bring 3 small wrapped items like toiletry sets, stationery, socks, food or drink (mine are often unwanted gifts).
Place them in a pile and give everyone a strip of raffle tickets. Make sure there are more raffle tickets than presents.
Tear up the matching raffle tickets and put in a hat. Start to draw them out. If someone's number is called they take any present. Once the pile has gone they can start to steal from each other until all the tickets are called.
There are generally a couple that people like the look of and keep stealing from each other. You can wrap things up to look better than they are (e.g what they think is wine is just oil). Once all the tickets are called people open what they're left with and see if things were what they thought. It's great fun.

rrhuth · 14/10/2021 06:36

I can see the logic but it doesn't seem right to me. Christmas has long been a time of gift-giving, and gifts do not have to be about excessive consumption. Lots of things, such as shampoo bars, hand cream, shopping bags, food items, chocolate, drinks, tea bags, socks are useful but make the day nice.

I'd do a nice mini stocking. Surely everyone likes a bar of chocolate?

Or give a voucher for a nice cafe near to their home?

We have a very restrained Christmas, but gifts remain part of it.

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