hmmm, but it's got to be okay if they cry, isn't it? it's not you that's causing them to cry, it's them and their useles, treacherous bodies. they don't want your babies, they want their own, and it's perfectly normal to have a weep about it, either when they read the card or are told on the phone. my point was that if you're writing a letter and add the golden 'we've been trying for a while and are relieved and proud' i think it might take the sting out a bit as it reminds the person that they're not alone and that it's not easy ttcing.
i always remember a pal came to tell me that she was pg, which i was composed and did the right things about, lots of 'oh that's great, it does make me a wee bit sad but it's nothing to do with you etc'.
until she told me that she'd had some pains and (because of my history with ectopics) had got an early scan at the hospital. hearing her tell me about how terrified she was that she was goiing to have an ectopic pregnancy (and be a wretched freak like me) was actually too much to bear, especially in light of the fact that everything was fine...
rather amazingly, she was upset that i cried in front of her and told me off about it later. to which i say... ffs get a grip. so, you mark that down as someone who is less sensitive than you thought.
i've got to be honest, i'm a bit shocked at all the people saying go for it on the scan etc front given the recent posts about how it can affect people... i suppose i should be glad they don't know how it feels to get one of those announcements.