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Original poster

Child has high expectations...

129 replies

lemonied · 14/08/2021 09:28

This is absolutely not a boasting thread.

Last year was awful for everyone and we over-did Christmas gifts to try and compensate. We were very fortunate that I didn't lose my job and wanted the children to have a magical day. They did, which was great, but now my daughter expects to have more this year. Whilst I am still employed, finances are tighter this year, and I have quite a smaller budget. I know that I could shop around for good deals, but I have an issue with the 'expectation', which I know is one that I have set. I tried saying to her about how it may not be as much this year, but it'll still be lovely, and she had a meltdown. How can I manage her expectation?

Also, I know that it's August, but she's a little obsessed with Christmas, mentions it at least once a day and always wants to watch Christmas movies/episodes.

OP posts:
Mommabear20 · 16/08/2021 12:30

Maybe try something like this:
'Hey sweetly! Santa called earlier and said that he was suuupppeerrr busy this year so would like to know what you would like so he can try his very best to get you what you'd like. Can we write down 3-5 things that would make you super happy and then we can make a list of lots of activities that me and you can do together at Christmas so I can make sure I can get them planned in for us! It's going to be so magical and special this year! Im so excited! Are you??'
That way she knows it's going to be special but understands that santa is busy this year so there might not be as many physical gifts under the tree

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 16/08/2021 12:30

so let her have a meltdown.
what's wrong with that?

LockdownCheeseToastie · 16/08/2021 13:21

Father Christmas has only ever brought stockings in our house, everything else is from the people themselves (so they can be duly thanked and appreciated). Makes it all so much easier re ‘billy got an xbox and I didn't’ unlimited funds issue and also that what is bought by people changes every year.

sadperson16 · 16/08/2021 13:27

Santa called earlier.....? Really.

HoppingPavlova · 16/08/2021 13:44

Also, I saw it on the news that Santa has fewer elves this year, what with Covid.

Precisely. The child is 5yo. This is not hard. If they crack it tell them it’s out of your control and to write a shitty letter to the Big Man himself and risk getting nothing otherwise shut up and put up (put in nice language for a 5yoGrin).

00100001 · 16/08/2021 13:54

@Mommabear20

Maybe try something like this: 'Hey sweetly! Santa called earlier and said that he was suuupppeerrr busy this year so would like to know what you would like so he can try his very best to get you what you'd like. Can we write down 3-5 things that would make you super happy and then we can make a list of lots of activities that me and you can do together at Christmas so I can make sure I can get them planned in for us! It's going to be so magical and special this year! Im so excited! Are you??' That way she knows it's going to be special but understands that santa is busy this year so there might not be as many physical gifts under the tree
It's August and she's 5...

The child could be distracted with looking forward to any of the following.... And the list is obviously not exhaustive....

A day trip somewhere...beach, park, theme park, farm, zoo, London, aquarium, museum...
Returning to school and seeing all her friends again
Halloween, dressing up and parties
Bonfire night, oooh fireworks and bonfires
Fetes/fairs.
Going out with family to anywhere.
Camping in the garden... Den building, fishing, going to ride bike to the local cafe for tea and cake, going on a train somewhere,
Baking or cooking, pizza/cake/spring rolls/doughnuts, biscuits....

Honestly..a 5yo shouldn't be obsessing about something that is 4 months away... 4 months may as well be an entire year at that age. It's definitely unusual!

00100001 · 16/08/2021 13:57

.. so rather than lie to her about a lie, by coming up with some odd tale about FC calling you...you could just distract and refocus on aaaallllll the other things in life.

Anordinarymum · 16/08/2021 13:58

What a spoilt brat OP and all of your own making !

NowEvenBetter · 16/08/2021 14:13

Surely Santa only brings the stocking/one present? Why would anyone set themselves up for that character to bestow ALL the gifts? Plenty of ‘magic’ from the character delivering a small amount of tat, and parents working and saving to buy the rest.

Bluntness100 · 16/08/2021 15:10

@Anordinarymum

What a spoilt brat OP and all of your own making !
Wow did you jist call a five year old a spoilt brat? That’s horrible and so uncalled for. When you start Hurling abuse at little kids on line you need to take a step back 😱
ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 16/08/2021 15:59

I just don't understand any advice of catering for this nonsense.

if any of mine said they wanted a 100 presents I'd say "yeah, me too, but that's not gonna happen. let's talk about something else."
And that would be the end of it, I would not cater for her obsessing about Christmas gifts in August!
And I ignore any tantrums relating to it. Seriously, when have parents become so afraid of their own children they don't dare to say "no, stop this"??

SemiFeralDalek · 16/08/2021 16:45

@ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba

I just don't understand any advice of catering for this nonsense. if any of mine said they wanted a 100 presents I'd say "yeah, me too, but that's not gonna happen. let's talk about something else." And that would be the end of it, I would not cater for her obsessing about Christmas gifts in August! And I ignore any tantrums relating to it. Seriously, when have parents become so afraid of their own children they don't dare to say "no, stop this"??
Yeah to be fair, I agree with this.

"I want 100 presents"

"don't be daft, shall we do some painting?"

If she kicks off, let her kick off.

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 16/08/2021 17:02

@SemiFeralDalek

pretty much.
DS6 is 7. he asked for a pool table for Christmas (because he plays with Grandad, PILs have one) and he wants to put it on the rug, between sofas & tv because "we have space there mummy!". (yeah, right!🤣)
I said it was an interesting idea but no.
the end.

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 16/08/2021 17:03

you could give her 100 x 1p coins though 🤣

MMMarmite · 16/08/2021 17:16

@unlimiteddilutingjuice

Last year my 5 year old asked for "A giant statue of myself made out of gold" She was quite happy with her dolls house on the day.
I like her style! GrinGrin
SemiFeralDalek · 16/08/2021 17:21

[quote ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba]@SemiFeralDalek

pretty much.
DS6 is 7. he asked for a pool table for Christmas (because he plays with Grandad, PILs have one) and he wants to put it on the rug, between sofas & tv because "we have space there mummy!". (yeah, right!🤣)
I said it was an interesting idea but no.
the end.[/quote]
My DS would quite like to be allowed to drive Grandads car right now, he's 4 and he "knows all the pedals so he can definitely do it himself!"

and perhaps a more difficult request, he wants to be Lady Gaga when he grows up. "That will be tricky, maybe for Halloween buddy". Spoiler alert, they don't make "mother monster" costumes in age 5-6 Grin

00100001 · 16/08/2021 17:33

@Anordinarymum

What a spoilt brat OP and all of your own making !
How very kind and constructive
Antwerpen · 16/08/2021 17:36

@Mommabear20

Maybe try something like this: 'Hey sweetly! Santa called earlier and said that he was suuupppeerrr busy this year so would like to know what you would like so he can try his very best to get you what you'd like. Can we write down 3-5 things that would make you super happy and then we can make a list of lots of activities that me and you can do together at Christmas so I can make sure I can get them planned in for us! It's going to be so magical and special this year! Im so excited! Are you??' That way she knows it's going to be special but understands that santa is busy this year so there might not be as many physical gifts under the tree
Is that you Pollyanna?
ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 16/08/2021 17:39

@SemiFeralDalek

yeah, he might have to wait a few years.
my 16 & 18 yo had a go at driving my car on a field (nobody within a mile radius) while on holiday. they were unsurprisingly rubbish...GTA doesn't quite prepare you for actual driving dudes!🤣

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 16/08/2021 17:40

@unlimiteddilutingjuice

🤣 is she a mini Rachel Berry?

irresistibleoverwhelm · 16/08/2021 19:07

Wow there are some horrible mean people on this thread! 🙁

unlimiteddilutingjuice · 16/08/2021 22:44

ZingDramaQueenofSheeba More like Turkman Bashi

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 17/08/2021 00:07

@unlimiteddilutingjuice

ZingDramaQueenofSheeba More like Turkman Bashi
@unlimiteddilutingjuice

"tastelessly iconic"
🤣🤣🤣

SemiFeralDalek · 17/08/2021 08:09

[quote ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba]@SemiFeralDalek

yeah, he might have to wait a few years.
my 16 & 18 yo had a go at driving my car on a field (nobody within a mile radius) while on holiday. they were unsurprisingly rubbish...GTA doesn't quite prepare you for actual driving dudes!🤣[/quote]
😂 We've compromised on the driving and he's planning on requesting a bike with gears off FC.

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 17/08/2021 08:49

nice one

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